“But while I’m pretty sure we’re going to have a huge fight as soon as that first word comes out of your mouth, I won’t leave you alone, Wes. You’ve had enough of that, and frankly, it really did a number on you. So I’m sticking around until you wake up. I’m the only person who knows you’re not really in a coma and that one of these days, you’ll be back.”
I stare into his flat, green eyes, searching for the slightest hint of the sparkle that had been such a defining part of his face, but it’s not there. I can’t stand it.
“I don’t imagine we’ll ever be friends, and yeah, I know you’ve got some gripes with me. Well, the feeling’s mutual, buddy. So just keep a list. Because as long as you’re here, I am too. You said it yourself—we’re linked, connected, with or without the drugs, so we might as well suck it up. We’ll never shake each other. Whether we like it or not.”
I’m quiet for a while, waiting for a response. None comes. Finally, I say, “Your eyes are going to dry out if I keep them open much longer, so I’m going to close them now. But you’ll see me again tomorrow.” I place my fingers on his eyelids and slide them shut before hopping off the bed and settling into the visitor’s chair. I open up a book.
“Now, where were we?” I ask as I turn to a dog-eared page. I clear my throat and begin to read.
I slip my fingers into Wes’s hand. To anyone walking by, I look like a loving girlfriend. Of course, my hand isn’t here out of love but pragmatism. I want to know the instant he comes back to life. Because sooner or later, he will.
And I will be ready.
Acknowledgments
I would like to thank the team at Sourcebooks for being such supportive collaborators—Elizabeth Boyer, Sabrina Baskey, Katy Lynch, Alex Yeadon, Todd Stocke, and Dominique Raccah. Thank you Nicole Hower for such a striking cover. Thank you Steve Geck for bringing me into the fold. And thank you to my editor, Annie Berger, for such thoughtful notes, warm support, and for loving Jessica Jones.
Thank you to my favorite agent, Nicole James, and to her cohorts at Chalberg & Sussman.
Thank God for the sanity squad: Sana Amanat, Luz Beltran, Kate Benanti, Mike Carey, Lauren Kogen, Sarah Markley (the namesake), Doreen Mulryan, Zeb Wells, and Alison Sheehy. Thank you Dr. Suraiya Kureshi Haider for dropping the science. And thank you to my workshop compatriots, Diana Asher and Jessica Benjamin, and to Alyssa Capucilli for bringing us together.
This book wouldn’t exist without my first, last, and every draft in between readers: Stefanie Pintoff and Heather Upton, who are as talented as editors as they are as writers.
Thank you to my big, beautiful family, especially my mom, Julie, and my dad, Ian.
Above all, thank you to my every day crew, without whom nothing would get done. Dan, Phinn, Lyra, M, and Smudge, you are the best.
About the Author
MacKenzie Cadenhead is a trained dramaturg and former comic book editor. She is the author of the middle-grade fantasy novel, Sally’s Bones, and coauthor of Marvel Press’s Super Hero Adventures early chapter books. She lives in New York with her family.
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