“I’m sorry,” she said. “I want it to be good for you, but I feel like I need to run around or something so I can calm down.”
Jaxon chuckled. “I think I understand now. That nervous energy you’re feeling is passion,” he said. “Take a couple of deep breaths and tried to relax.”
Jaxon gave her a couple of seconds before his mouth found hers, but this time he did not linger there, he moved to her ear allowing his mere breath to ignite a firestorm of sensation.
“Oh,” she breathed, her eyes closing involuntarily at the feeling.
The hand at her collarbone could feel her heart thumping hard and steady in her chest.
His tongue stroked the edge of her ear as he found the buttons of her nightshirt. One by one, he pushed the buttons through the holes until the garment lay open to the waist. Jaxon pushed it back until he could see one breast and then the other.
“You have beautiful breasts,” he said as he covered one with his hand and the other with his mouth sucking gently and teasing her nipple into its full plumpness. Her nipples were the size of one of his fingers from the bed of his nail to the tip. They were gloriously large and he felt himself throbbing with need at the sight and feel of them.
Charlie inhaled raggedly as he drew the pink bud into his mouth.
“Jaxon!” she gasped. “Oh!”
Her hands flexed restlessly as her back arched off the bed. She wanted to scream for him to stop because she wasn’t sure she could take much more. But at the same time, it felt so amazing; she didn’t want him to ever stop.
And then he did.
Her breathing was fast and ragged again and he seemed to be waiting for her to relaxed before he kissed his way from that breast to the other. This time he did not suckle the tip. This time he licked it and blew cool air over it. The bud puckered and the whole breast flooded with chilled bumps.
Charlie moaned in a raspy voice.
“Jaxon, I—”
He loved the nipple with his tongue again, flicking and lapping at the tip, then blowing on it again.
“Were you going to say something?”
“I don’t remember.” Her brain never worked right when he touched her.
Jaxon backed away from her and remove her night shirt and her knickers. He couldn’t wait much longer. If he became any harder without relief, he was going to be in pain.
As Jaxon moved to cover her with his body, Charlie looked down to see his arousal. She hadn’t been able to stop herself. She wanted to be prepared. Her eyes grew wide and she suddenly still as she realized her worst fear. He truly was going to split her in two if he wielded it like a weapon. But Charlie knew she loved Jaxon and she truly wanted to please him, even if it was going to be unpleasant. Charlie promised herself no matter how bad it hurt, she wouldn’t let herself cry. As she mentally prepared herself, Jaxon made his first forays between her legs. Her hips came off the bed as his mouth found the sensitive nub.
“Jax!” Her voice was high with surprise. “You mustn’t….” Her voice trailed off into a moan.
“I must,” he teased, lifting his head momentarily, though in truth, he didn’t have to. Charlie was already slick to his touch, but he’s still wanted to taste her nectar and bring her to the brink with his mouth before he entered her. He was so aroused, he wasn’t sure if he could last as long as she deserved so it was even more important to get her as equally aroused.
As Jaxon loved her with his mouth, he slid one finger into her; a minute later his second finger entered her. Jaxon allowed the muscles to stretch before he withdrew them and placed the tip of his shaft at her opening.
“Charlie, I love you,” he said entering her slowly, making small strokes, each time going a little deeper, stopping when he felt himself at her maidenhead. “Thank you for saving yourself for me. I-I don’t want to hurt you.” He was reluctant to push through it knowing he would cause her pain.
Suddenly, Charlie lifted her hips forcing him deeper. She made a slight whimper. Jaxon stilled her hips to allow the pain time to dissipate and for the untried muscles a moment to acclimate to the new intrusion.
Jaxon sought out her mouth and kissed her again and slowly withdrew and re-invaded. He only meant to increase the depth of his thrusts incrementally until she took him completely, but Charlie drove her pelvis into his and in one swift move, she sheathed him to the hilt.
Jaxon moaned at feel of her warmth tightly cocooning him. “Charlie,” he murmured. “Oh, baby, you don’t know what you’re doing to me.”
Jaxon began moving within her and she was moving beneath him, arching and drawing him in in a rhythm as old as mankind.
Her breath came in fast shallow moans, escalating in both timbre and frequency as her passion grew.
“Oh my God, I can’t breathe, I can’t….” She shuddered as the orgasm washed over her. “My God, Jaxon! I can’t…”
Whatever she was going to say was lost as she arched and whimpered. Her muscles clamped around him, throbbing and convulsing in waves. He couldn’t prolong his pleasure any longer and buried himself in her depths.
“Baby, oh.” He let out a primal moan as he spilled himself in her and he collapsed on top of her. She tightened her muscles making him shudder.
She sighed.
He smiled at the sound as he wrapped his arms around her and rolling onto his back bringing her with him. His eyes closed as he held her, content that his life could not be any more perfect.
“You did that to me again. I-I thought I had imagined it the other time. I didn’t know my body could feel like that. That was amazing.”
Jaxon chuckled at her choice of words. “Yes, it was,” he said stroking her hair. “You’re amazing.”
“I thought it was going to be horrible, but it wasn’t.”
Jaxon’s head came up; his eyes wide as he peered into her contented, flushed face resting on his chest.
“You thought it was going to be horrible?”
“Aye,” she admitted. “Especially when I saw how big you are, I thought it was going to be painful, but it was perfect.”
Jaxon chuckled. He loved the way she had to say exactly what was on her mind. Most women would have been retrospect and quiet after making love the first time, but Charlie couldn’t contain herself.
“I can’t believe you were expecting it to be horrible and yet, you didn’t want to wait.”
“I wanted to do it for you. I wanted you to have pleasure. I didn’t know I would, too.”
Jaxon felt like a first-class fool. He had assumed because she had been raised in the company of men, she knew everything there was to know about sex. But they would have spoken coarsely about rutting and conquests from a fraternal, and no doubt, crude perspective. Charlie had no mother or other married woman in her life to talk about the marriage bed. He should have asked his sister Imelia to talk with her to ease her fears. He wondered if anyone had warned her about her menses.
“When you told me your doctor caught you looking at his books and he thought it was because you were interested in medicine, it was because you had started to bleed, wasn’t it?”
“Aye,” she whispered. “I had heard the men speak of it before and I thought they were making up stories to scare the young crewmen, but I didn’t think it was true until it happened.”
“You didn’t tell the doctor or your father?”
“Dr. Kirk eventually figured it out when I kept stealing the material he used for bandages. It was a hard thing to hide on a ship. And frankly, the doctor was nearly useless except in supplying me with rags.”
Jaxon wrapped his arms tightly around her. “Charlie, never be embarrassed to tell me or ask me anything. If I don’t know, I will find out for you or you can ask my mother or my sisters.”
Charlie blushed to her roots, but somehow managed to tell him she would be needing rags in a few days.
He wondered how she would’ve dealt with it if he did not broach the subject.
Secretly, Jaxon hoped she’d have no need for the rags.
22
Charlie stood perfectly still. She had been poked with pins more times than she could count during these fittings. She had asked Jaxon not to stay for fear that his presence was making Mabel nervous and that was why she had become a human pincushion.
As Mabel began marking seams and thrusting pins in place, Mrs. Jenkins showed Charlie trim and sketches.
“So Captain Bloodworthy decided not to join you?”
“He has his own fitting today,” Charlie said, knowing he made his appointment after she asked him to let her go alone.
“Oh, which tailor is he using?”
Charlie thought for a moment. “I don’t remember the name, but it’s the one on the corner of the next block.”
“Oh, Samuel Levins?”
“Aye, that’s it.”
Mrs. Jenkins nodded. “Mr. Levins does splendid work.”
The bell over the door jangled alerting the women to another customer. Mrs. Jenkins, supervising the fitting, disappeared through the curtain to the retail area of the shop.
“Miss Adams, what a surprise. How can we help you today?”
Millie Adams lowered her voice. “I saw her come in. I want to meet her.”
Mrs. Jenkins looked around nervously trying to figure out how to prevent Millie Adams from confronting Captain Bloodworthy’s fiancée. She genuinely liked Miss Sinclair, and had dealt with Millie Adams enough to know that she was helpless to stop her. When Millie pushed past the seamstress to the back, Mrs. Jenkins rushed out of the store. Thank goodness she knew where Captain Bloodworthy was having his fitting.
“Hello, Mabel. Won’t you introduce us?”
Charlie forced a polite smile to her lips. She didn’t know much about social interaction with a land woman, but some things just seemed common sense. Did one extend their hand before or after the introductions? What if she was supposed to curtsy? Perhaps the woman would forgive her if she faltered. The woman had a regal way of carrying herself that made Charlie feel inferior. The woman’s lips curled into a sneer.
“Uh,” Mabel said, frozen to the spot, three straight pins held between her lips.
“No need. I know who she is. Do you still have any material from my blue dress? It would be the perfect trim on Miss Sinclair’s dress. After all, I know she likes my scraps.”
The smiled died on her Charlie’s lips.
She was stunned. She had no idea who this pretty blonde viper was, or why she would say such a thing. Quickly, Charlie drew on her memory of meeting Grayson for the first time.
“I’m afraid you have me at a disadvantage.”
“Good.” The smirk on her face marred the woman’s beautiful looks. She had the most stunning crystal blue eyes. They reminded Charlie of the ocean water in Aruba. Her nose seemed too small for her face, but gave her a China doll appearance. Charlie wondered if her hair might have come from Swedish ancestors as it was so pale that it was nearly white and pinned up fashionably.
Removing the pins from her mouth Mabel cut in. “She’s Millie Adams, Captain Bloodworthy’s former fiancée.”
“Former? He never had the guts to break it off with me himself, but yes, we were betrothed when he was still handsome. I just can’t imagine how anyone can keep from running away in horror when you see his face now. You only have to look at Grayson to see what I had.”
If Millie Adams had been a man, she met in a tavern, Charlie would have known how to handle her, but she had never been verbally attacked by a woman before.
“I can see why Jaxon wouldn’t mention you,” Charlie gritted. “You’re not worth mentioning. But let me extend my gratitude. Thank you for not marrying him. He makes me very happy.”
Millie looked Charlie up and down and made a face as though she didn’t measure up. “You mean his money makes you very happy. Why else would someone wed something so hideous? But then again, I guess when you’re ugly; you have to take what you can get."
Mabel gasped. “Don’t listen to her Miss Sinclair. You’re prettier than she’ll ever be,” Mabel said. “She is just jealous because you’re getting him to the altar after knowing him for a short time and she couldn’t get him there in several years of engagement.”
“Oh, what would you know, Mabel? No man has ever looked twice at you or that horrid mop of red hair. I bet Mrs. Jenkins has to inspect your fingernails every day before she lets you touch the fabric.”
Charlie had had enough. It was one thing to lash out at the person who was marrying her former fiancée, it was quite another to attack Mabel who was sweet and kind and shy. Charlie took a step towards her, her muscles tensing of their own accord.
“I waited for him through the best years of my life. But you’re wrong if you think I’m jealous of her. I know I’m the luckiest person alive when I think I could have gotten stuck with that hideous monster for the rest of my life. The idea of kissing him is repulsive.”
“That’s funny,” Jaxon said walking through the curtain. “The thought of kissing you makes my stomach turn.”
Neither woman heard the bell above the door jangle.
“Jaxon!”
“What do you want, Millie?”
Charlie had seen that look on Jaxon’s face before. The scars made his scowl look absolutely menacing.
“I know you just brought her here to make me jealous because you want me back, but it’s not going to work. I wouldn’t have you back if you were the last man on earth. I’d rather die an old maid.”
“My God, Mildred. You’re delusional.”
“My name is not Mildred and you know it.”
“It’s my understanding your days of being a maiden are long gone. As a matter of fact, I heard from many people how well rid of you I was, because you were with more than one man while we were engaged.”
Her face was red with fury. “That’s not true,” she shrieked, stomping her foot. “And how can you challenge my virtue when your bride-to-be has already moved in?”
Jaxon stepped between Millie and Charlie shielding her from the unpredictable woman.
“I’m going to warn you now, Millie. If you ever so much as say more than ‘Good morning,’ to Charlie again, I will spread around town that you tried to seduce Grayson the night I came home injured. I watched the whole thing from the top of the stairs, Millie, so don’t try to deny it.”
Millie opened her mouth to say something, but snapped it shut again. She looked like a fish out of water.
“Leave.”
Millie Adams stood for a moment longer, but wisely decided to turn on her heel and stomped out of the shop without a word, slamming the door behind her.
“Thank you for coming to get me, Mrs. Jenkins,” Jaxon said then turned to Charlie. “Are you all right?”
“I was just caught off guard. Daniel had mentioned her name, but I thought you’d eventually tell me about her if she was important.”
Jaxon looked chagrined. “She was the biggest mistake of my life. I was too embarrassed to admit I ever had feelings for her. Ironically, I never looked past her pretty face to know how truly ugly she is.”
“’Ironically’?”
“I had to become ugly to realize how shallow I was.”
“You are the most handsome man I’ve ever met. Does that make me shallow, too?” she asked stepping up to him and putting her arms carefully around his waist trying not to stab either of them with the pins in her dress.
“Even better looking than Grayson?”
“Grayson? He’s only good looking because he favors you.”
“Really?” he said, a smile coming to his lips.
“I don’t mean to be rude, but he’s a bit of a jackass.”
He touched her face then softly kissed her. “Are you almost finished here? I’ve got a surprise for you.”
“Another ten minutes, Captain,” Mabel said pushing a red lock of hair behind her ear.
“I’ll wait outside.”
After they heard the door shut, Mabel turned to Charlie. “I think he’s handsome, too. I
hope someday I’ll meet someone who loves me as much as Captain Bloodworthy loves you. Every time he looks at you, his eyes light up. He’s really sweet.”
Charlie wasn’t sure Jaxon would fully appreciate be called sweet, but she smiled in spite of herself.
Jaxon never made it to his fitting. He had seen Jayne on the way and she suggested he take Charlie riding and on a picnic. When he commended her on the idea, she ran home to make all the arrangement with the family cook. Although she was not as tall as Charlie, she felt her riding habit would fit well enough and her mare was gentle enough for any first time rider.
When Charlie finished her fitting, Jaxon took her to his mother’s home where everything waited on them. Charlie changed then met Jaxon in the barn for a quick lesson in riding before leaving. She had been a little nervous since she had never ridden before, but found it less scary than she anticipated. They ate their lunch at a scenic little pond then dipped their bare feet into the water. But it was so late in the year; the water was too icy to keep their feet in long.
“I bet you used to swim naked here when you were young,” she said.
“A couple of times,” he admitted. “We’ll have to come here in the summer some time.”
“I’m not swimming naked.”
“We’ll go at night.”
“And I’ll be sitting right here fully dressed.”
23
Seeing what joy new experiences brought her, Jaxon tried to find something new to expose her to daily. It was the more mundane things he was having better luck with.
When he took her to the fanciest hotel restaurant in town for a cup of chocolate, she told him in Mexico, they put cinnamon in it. This cup was the way it was served in most of Europe.
When they walked around town, if she saw flowers growing she had to stop and look at them up close. She always had to ask the flowers’ name and smell it, even if that meant getting down on her hands and knees to do so. Jaxon only knew the names of a few, so he stopped at the booksellers and ordered her a book about flowers. He bought her paper and a charcoal pencil to try to draw the blooms, but found she was easily frustrated by her lack of skill. It was an unnecessary talent on the ship, so she’d never been encouraged to draw.
An Officer but No Gentleman Page 19