Choices of the Heart

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Choices of the Heart Page 16

by Daniels, Julia


  “I just mean—” She pulled away slightly, not wanting his gentle distraction.

  “You have a very soft heart.” He smiled.

  She looked away, hoping the tears she felt building wouldn’t spill over. Chloe sniffed and blinked quickly.

  “Did you have fun with Grandma and Grandpa, Bobby?” She looked down at the small boy clinging to Reese’s pant leg. His thumb was firmly stuck in his mouth.

  “Yup.” He nodded and shot Rosie, who stood on the other side of Reese, a shy glance. He’d been particularly quiet since they picked him up.

  “Was there any mail for me at the post office?” Chloe looked back inside the car, remembering the pile his father had handed him.

  “I didn’t look. You go ahead.” He bobbed his head toward the stack.

  She shifted Charlie so she could reach inside the car without hitting his head on the frame of the vehicle. She’d given her nursing friends this address when she’d resigned at the hospital. There were several envelopes addressed to her, just as she hoped. The friends she’d made in Lincoln would last a lifetime. School had drawn them together, but their similar backgrounds would keep them close.

  The letter at the bottom of the pile just about fell from her hands. She felt as if the hot day had suddenly gotten even hotter. She took a deep breath and shoved it back under the pile, hoping Reese wouldn’t see it. Oh, Dr. Tom, leave me alone!

  “Is something wrong, honey?” Reese asked.

  “No.” She cleared her throat and gave what she hoped looked like a legitimate smile. “Just letters from my nursing friends.”

  She leaned her back against the car and handed Charlie to Reese, worried that with the world spinning and feeling faint she might drop him. She swallowed back the worry.

  “You sure? You’ve gone white all of a sudden.” He felt her forehead. “You feel all right?”

  “I’m fine,” she lied.

  She had so much to tell him, felt guilty she hadn’t shared anything about her time in Lincoln with him. He hadn’t asked her. Maybe he didn’t care? Maybe he just didn’t want to know.

  Rosie ran off, singing Amazing Grace, and Reese held out his hand.

  “Come on,” he called, “let’s get these kids inside.”

  Chloe stuffed the mail under her arm and followed him, hoping he didn’t notice the sheen of nervous sweat coating her palm. They walked together up to the back door of the house.

  “Home sweet home,” Reese said. “All of us.” He laughed and looked from Bobby’s chocolate smile to Rosie’s dirty hands and then at baby Charlie, who seemed content to simply stare at his new papa. Reese’s laughter increased until he was laughing so hard Chloe saw tears in his eyes. “What a family we’ve thrown together, Chloe Anne.”

  Chloe laughed too—more at his reaction than at their situation. A month ago, she was sharing space at a nursing dorm with three other women, taking care of the sick and elderly. Today, she was a mother of three and a new wife. God willing, she would make her life one of happiness and few unhappy tears. But first, she had to find out why Dr. Tom was writing to her and maybe—just maybe—tell Reese a little bit about what her life had been like before she’d moved back home.

  Chloe followed him up through the back door of the farmhouse. The place needed cleaning, and dinner needed to be made, but Reese’s mother had given her a casserole to feed her new family, and the chores could wait. Right now, she wanted to find a way to get a few minutes alone so she could read her letter.

  “I’m going to go change clothes and head out for chores.” Reese kissed her cheek and went toward the stairs. Bobby and Rosie trailed after him, unwittingly giving Chloe the opportunity she’d hoped for.

  “Pa’s bringing the crib over after supper,” Reese called back to her.

  She waited until she heard his footsteps in their bedroom upstairs before diving back into the pile of letters she’d set on the table. It was difficult not to rip open the letter from Tom. Why was he writing her? She thought they’d said their goodbyes, thought the letter she sent when she quit the hospital was sufficient to break off their relationship. What more could he have to say to her?

  Reese bounded back into the kitchen, dressed in overalls and a sweat-stained work shirt. She definitely needed to clean up his wardrobe.

  “I’ll take Bobby and Rosie out with me.” He pulled out a chair and sat down to put on his beat-up boots. “Think she’s too young to milk a cow?”

  “Nope,” Chloe said, remembering her own childhood chores. “I think I was five the first time I did it. Let her try. Might be hard at first to get the rhythm, but once she’s got it, that’ll be a good chore for her. That and the eggs.”

  “I’ve had second thoughts about her gatherin’ the eggs. Dang snakes love to get in there.” He kissed Chloe’s cheek again. “I’ll be back in a bit.”

  She almost said it. She almost told him she loved him. It was on the tip of her tongue. How could it not be? He was as perfect as he always had been. Patient to a fault, a hard worker and a good friend. How would he react when she told him about her relationship with Tom? She had no choice but to do so, not since the fool had decided to write to her.

  She looked out the window over the sink, watching him chase Bobby and Rosie down the path to the barn. She caught the sound of laughter and watched with pleasure as Rosie skipped as if there wasn’t a thing in the world to worry about. That picture alone, painted in her mind, would make rearing the girl worthwhile.

  When Chloe was sure Reese was occupied in the barn, she took her lemonade and sat down, eyeing the pile of mail stacked neatly in the middle of the kitchen table. She sorted it into two piles, his and hers, feeling an odd pang again. Sharing an address with him. The weird and new intimacies of marriage went well beyond the bedroom. It was in so many little things. Seeing his shirts hanging next to her dresses. Sharing a bathroom. Putting his thick socks next to her hose.

  She let the breeze from the window ruffle her hair. It felt so good she actually took out the pins and let it hang in its natural bob. It had been awhile since she cut it and it needed a trim, but she wasn’t all that worried about it. She was home now, and if she wanted to wear her hair long and stay in her nightdress all day, by golly, she would!

  She shifted her attention back to the letter pile. Her stomach was queasy. She would read Molly’s and Nellie’s letters after supper. It would be fine to share those with Reese. But Tom’s had to come first, while the house was empty save for Charlie, who was napping. Maybe it was nothing, but Chloe figured if the busy doctor took the time to write, he must have something important to say.

  Dearest Chloe:

  I was quite saddened to learn of the loss of your sister. However, when I learned you had resigned your post at the hospital, I was shocked, to say the least.

  Why didn’t you tell me you were going to stay in Broken Bow?

  Why did I have to hear it from your roommates? I thought I meant more to you than that. I deserved more consideration. Don’t you think?

  There’s the question of my marriage proposal, as well. You never gave me an answer, but now I must assume you are choosing not to come home to Lincoln at all. Has something happened to force you to stay away from here? From me?

  Please tell me you will reconsider and come back to Lincoln! You are greatly missed at the hospital but most especially by me, my love.

  Nothing has changed in my mind or my heart.

  Please come home.

  TF

  “Well, how about that?” Chloe spoke aloud to the walls of her kitchen. “He never even said he cared about me while I was there. Now that I am gone, it seems he cannot make do without me.”

  She stood to fill her glass of lemonade, considering what type of response might be appropriate and what she would tell Reese about the other man.

  She had briefly considered marrying Tom. What a step up in society! An abused farm girl marries a renowned, wealthy doctor. They would have moved in all the elite social circles in
Lincoln and Omaha. Tom even had aspirations to become a member of the Nebraska Legislature and mentioned Washington DC more than once.

  He was arrogant and controlling. Seductive, charming and handsome, but too overbearing. Their marriage would have been a cold, very formal arrangement. She would have decorated his arm at parties and served as hostess at teas for wives of the other doctors. He told her she would have maids and a cook. It had sounded boring, at the time. Still did. Would her life have been similar to Daisy’s had she chosen Tom?

  Rosie clamored through the back door, breaking up her musings.

  “Mama, you’ll never guess what I just did!”

  Chloe stood speechless for a moment, catching Reese’s eye as he came in behind the little girl. Had he heard? Mama. Rosie had called Chloe Mama. Chloe’s throat grew tight, and she swallowed hard, bending down to look in Rosie’s sparkling eyes.

  “What did you just do?” She snagged a hug then released Rosie quickly, waiting to hear what had her so excited.

  “I—milked—a—cow! A real one.” Wide-eyed, she covered her mouth with her hands. “Holy smokes, can you believe it?”

  “How exciting.” Chloe laughed and then hugged her again. It would be terrific if she were always this excited with her chores. Chloe straightened. “So, where’s the milk?”

  “Right here.” Reese held up two pails of frothy white liquid.

  “Papa said it was too heavy, and that I would drop it.” She pulled out a chair at the table. “Can I drink some of it?”

  “You bet.” Chloe chuckled, curious just how much milk the little girl had actually retrieved on her own. “Help me set the table?”

  “You bet!” Rosie repeated Chloe’s response.

  Chloe handed Rosie one glass at a time from the cupboard, and the young girl dutifully placed them at the spot where each chair sat at the table. The dishes came down next, and then Chloe pulled the silverware from the drawer, noticing she would have to add some pieces to the collection. There were five people suddenly living in the house, instead of a single man.

  “Mama, you hear Charlie crying?”

  “I’ll go see to him. Can you finish putting the forks and spoons out, please?” Chloe kissed the top of the girl’s head and went to check on the baby.

  He was gurgling happily in the dresser drawer she had him sleeping in. Chloe hoped he’d do as well in the crib when it arrived. These were the first smiles she’d seen from the boy, and she thrilled at the sight. She heard the back door open and Bobby’s babbling voice.

  She checked Charlie’s diaper, replaced it with a fresh one and rushed into the kitchen to show Reese how happy the baby was. It was a relief and convinced her he was truly a healthy child. He’d just needed to adapt to the new family.

  She stopped short when she saw Reese. Anger and hurt etched his face as he stood reading the letter she’d forgotten to put away. Her heart fell. She was mad at herself for not setting it aside to share with him later, to soften the surprise.

  “Did you lie to me? Did you sleep with him, Chloe Anne? Are you in love with him?” His voice was deceptively soft, and he didn’t take his eyes off the letter.

  “Reese—” She moved forward and touched his arm.

  He pulled it away as if she had burned him. “Did you?” he demanded.

  “What did I tell you?”

  He met her eyes, and the uncertainty and pain she saw there ripped her heart out. The jealousy, not unlike what she had felt when she’d learned he and Isabelle were dating, was obvious as well.

  Without another word, he handed her the letter and walked back out into the yard.

  “Reese!” She rushed after him, baby still in her arms.

  “Not now, Chloe.” He didn’t turn but kept walking away from her. “I’ll be back in a while. Send Rosie to get me for supper.”

  Standing statue still on the porch, she watched him leave her. It wasn’t her fault Tom had written. It was, however, her fault that she’d left the letter sitting there. She should have told him about this before.

  She walked back into the house and put Charlie on a blanket on the floor in the living room. Now what? And why did life always have to be so complicated? She collapsed on a chair and heaved a heavy sigh. Bobby crawled onto her lap and plugged his thumb into his mouth.

  Chapter Seventeen

  Tension. Anger and hurt.

  Only the occasional brushing of the sheers against the windowpane in concert with the breeze broke the silence. That, and the gentle breathing of his wife lying next to him.

  He had a right to feel hoodwinked. She’d never told him about this Doctor Tom. But he had no right to be angry with her for not remaining alone. He had courted Isabelle, but Chloe knew about that.

  Chloe never had any intention of coming back to Broken Bow, so she’d lived her life in Lincoln looking ahead, not back. He’d gleaned that much from her attitude when she’d arrived for the funerals. She never planned to marry Reese. Apparently, she’d been all set to become the wife of a doctor. No wonder she wasn’t overly thrilled with the prospect of raising Bobby and staying here. But why had she opted to stay, after all?

  “I didn’t sleep with him. Didn’t even come close,” she whispered into the darkness. “You’ve been my one and only, Reese. I told you that the first night I was back here, when I so badly needed your comfort and love.”

  She rolled onto her side, facing him. He didn’t move, even when she placed a cool hand on his chest.

  “You were my first kiss when I was sixteen, my first lover at eighteen. You will be my last, and the only man I have in between.” She kissed his bare shoulder and melded her body against him. “I planned to tell you this evening. About Tom. About Lincoln, if you wanted to hear about it.”

  “I do,” he finally said. “It seems as if you lived a completely different lifestyle there. You know so many people I don’t.”

  “They were good people, Reese. The other letters in the pile were from my roommates. They were lovely girls. A lot of fun. Good girls. Some women today are getting a little wild for my taste, but my friends were conservative girls with good heads on their shoulders. They finished their programs when I did. My three closest friends are staying in Lincoln to work.”

  “City women are wild today; we saw that in Chicago,” Reese answered. “I read stories of the goings-on. It’s scandalous.”

  “I saw their fast ways, but that didn’t mean I chose that for myself.” Chloe rested her head on his shoulder, her hand caressing his chest. “We had a matron who oversaw our activities. I will admit to drinking some illegal spirits, just like we planned to do at the speakeasy in Chicago. But that was about the only questionable activity I was involved with.”

  He turned on his side then and pulled her against him. “What about those petting parties?” He had to ask, had to have answers to his questions. “Did you participate or just watch?”

  “Heard about those, did you?” She pulled his face toward her and kissed his lips. “I went to one and was so disgusted and embarrassed by what I saw there, I left.” She rested her head back on his shoulder. “I couldn’t imagine getting pawed by some strange man. That didn’t seem much like entertainment to me.”

  “No?” Reese rolled onto his back and pulled her on top of him “I thought you like to kiss? You’re awfully good at it.”

  He cupped her cheeks and brought her lips down to meet his, wanting a sample of her skills, despite his concerns.

  “Just certain people.” She leaned forward and kissed him again.

  “Me and who else?”

  “Who said I like to kiss you, huh?” she teased.

  “Actions speak louder than words.” He wrestled her under him, leaned up on one elbow so he could see her face. “And I am about to show you just how much I like kissing you. How about we have our own little petting party, honey?”

  “Not having strangers watch us might take some of the excitement away.” She trailed her fingers low on his chest, spreading her fingers over
his stomach.

  “I disagree.” Reese brushed her cheek. “Touching you is all the excitement I’ll ever need.”

  ~*~

  “You’ve got an extra spring in your step today, Reese.” Mr. Jacobson, the owner of the mercantile, met Reese at the shop’s counter.

  “Just a beautiful summer day,” Reese answered with a smile.

  There was a lot adding to his happiness today, but he wouldn’t share the reasons with Jacobsen. Reese watched Chloe with the children, picking out activities to keep them busy.

  “I saw you come in with all those young’uns and Miss Chloe. I’m betting there’s quite a story behind that one.”

  “Not so odd, really.” He looked back at Jacobson. “They were given up by their mother, and we took them in. Chloe fell in love with little Rosie right away, and we couldn’t separate the brother and sister.”

  “Awful nice of you. You’ll have to add on more rooms to that old farmhouse a yours if you have children of your own.”

  Reese laughed, but the mercantile owner was right. He’d have to add a leaf to the kitchen table and more chairs and more diapers and more… He shook his head as it started to spin with details. Just more people to love and be loved by. He and Chloe both needed that.

  “I was hoping you’d set up a credit line for me. I haven’t needed it before, but my wife might need something and not be able to get to me for cash before she comes to town.”

  “You don’t need to explain. Most husbands do that for their wives.” He laughed. “Know what?” Jacobson leaned forward and lowered his voice. “Her mama had an account here. Kept it separate from the family account. Said something might come up, and she’d need money fast.” He crossed his arms. “That bastard she married kicked the hell outta her more often than not. I was happy to keep it for her. I still have several hundred dollars set aside in an envelope. Kept it for Chloe and Daisy. Was meanin’ to speak to Chloe about it when she’d come home for the funeral.”

  “I understand.” Reese considered the implications of what Jacobson was telling him. “A hundred, you said?”

 

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