I'm going over there tonight. We will take the other test and talk about what our future may hold. This is scary for me. I just hope I'm able to help her through this at the same time I'm still trying to reel it in. I don't want to be insensitive, but I need to know where her head is in this. Whatever decisions we make we have to make together, right? I don't know how to handle this. If it was me talking to a friend about it I could spout all kinds of wise words. Marry her, make sure you do this right, don't let her go through this alone…
But it isn't a friend, it's me. I'm not completely convinced I can do this, play this role as a dad.
Someone needs to help me sort out how I feel at the moment and how to handle this. Someone needs to share wise words with me because I'm coming up empty. The doubt in my head is loud and clear at the moment. I need to call Brad, he's been my best friend and has been through it all with me since we were kids. He can level my head a little to help me tonight. That, and a drink or ten.
“Hey man, you doing anything for lunch? I'm gonna try and cut out of work early today.”
“Trent, man, how are ya? Yeah sure, what you got in mind, brother?”
“Was thinking some food and a few drinks, I messed up, man. I need to talk to you. Gotta level some shit out,” I tell him while trying not to sound freaked out.
“Uh, okay sure. Let's meet up at Slots in about an hour.”
“Thanks, man. That sounds perfect. I'll see you then.”
I hang up with Brad and start to finish the caseload that needs to be completed for my uncle by next week. We've been loaded down and I have worked a lot of extra hours trying to prepare. Andrea and I need our chill night. Between our classes and everything else, it's been hard to just get time together other than sleeping.
We stay together just about every night, she either sleeps at my place or I sleep at hers. I like having her with me. Just being around her calms and relaxes me, which I love. I've never had it so easy with someone before.
But I gotta get my head straight and calm before the storm thunders through our lives. Time with Brad will do just that.
***
Walking into Slots, I see Brad waiting for me at our usual high top table.
“Hey man, thanks for meeting me on such short notice,” I say gratefully to him, sitting down.
“Good to see you, man. You look exhausted,” he remarks, noticing the obvious long days affecting me. If the bags under my eyes and scruff on my face are any indication.
“Yeah long hours and not enough downtime, that's for sure. That's one reason I needed to get out early and just chill for a bit,” I tell him. I grab the bottle of beer off the table Brad ordered for me and take a hearty drink.
“And well, I need your advice. Andrea called me today on her lunch break. She's pregnant,” I drop on him quickly while slamming the rest of my beer, looking around for our waitress so I can order another.
Brad sits stunned for a minute. “So, how do you feel about it? I mean, you've loved the girl since the first time you saw her right over there,” he says, nodding his head toward the bar. “Ever since you met that girl you have been by her side. I've never seen you this way with anyone. So that being said, just make sure her side is where you stay.”
I sit back for a moment thinking about what he just said as the waitress comes over to our table.
“Hey guys, what can I get ya? Are you just staying on his tab today?” she asks, while nodding a toothy grin toward Brad.
Brad looks at me, chuckles and then says, “Hi, two more beers. We’re only here for a few and then heading out, so we will just cash out then.
Smiling a little bigger at me and then Brad, she walks away to get our drinks.
"Snap out of it, man! You're scaring me." I jumped as his hand smacks the table in front of me. I blink, then laugh.
“You're right man, I need to get over to her tonight and just hold my girl. This wasn't what we planned, but I'm not walking away,” I tell him adamantly.
He claps my back and smiles. “That's my man.”
The waitress comes back over with our beers and sets them down in front of us. Looking back and forth between us, she asks, “Anything else I can get you guys?”
“Nah thanks, we're all set for now,” Brad tells her as I nod.
Looking me up and down smiling, she licks her lips and saunters away.
“Dude! That chick so wanted you to look her way and give her some attention.” Brad laughs, nodding his head toward the retreating waitress.
Shaking my head laughing, I tell him, “I think she's in my accounting class.”
“Hey, sweetheart,” Brad yells toward the waitress.
“Can we get some shots over here for me and my man, Trent, here? We got some celebrating to do,” he says as she comes walking back to our table.
“Two shots of Jack, please,” he says looking at me.
I nod my head in acknowledgement.
“What are we celebrating, guys?” she asks, winking.
“What's your name, sweetheart?” Brad asks her.
“Megan,” she answers quickly.
“Well, Megan. My main man, Trent here, is gonna be a daddy. He and his girl are so excited about it.”
Megan looks shocked stupid for a moment, her face reddening a little, but smiles wide. “Congratulations, I'll go grab those for you,” she says while hurriedly walking away.
Shaking my head laughing, I knock the bottom of my beer bottle on top of his. As his foams up and over the top, the shocked look as he shoves his mouth over it to catch it is priceless.
“What the hell was that for, jerk?” he says laughing.
“You looked like you could use some head, think Lauren needs to help you out,” I say through my laughter.
“Funny man, our head is just fine,” he says flipping me off.
“Just making sure, since you're all for spouting my crap to people from school.”
“Oh, shit man. Sorry. Was just trying to back her off you. She looked like she wanted to climb you for a ride,” he says while obscenely gyrating his hips.
Shaking my head, I pinch the bridge of my nose to hold the laughter in at his stupid ass.
“All good, man. Just hope she doesn't spread it around before Andrea has a chance to tell anyone.”
“You think she would care if I told Lauren?” he asks sincerely.
“No, she loves Lauren. I'm sure she will tell her when she has more info to share. I don't know how all this works, she should be going to the doctor soon.”
Megan brings our shots and another beer for each of us back to our table. Setting them down smiling, she asks, “Anything else I can get for you before I bring your bill?”
“I think we’re good, thanks,” I tell her.
Blushing, she hurries back over to the computer to get our bill.
Brad picks his shot up and raises it toward me. “To new adventures, man. May they be all you ever need.”
Clinking my glass with his, we down our shots. Feeling the burn of the whiskey down my throat, I take a swig of my beer. I swing by Megan to order another few shots on my way to the bathroom to take a piss.
“I'm gonna finish this up and head over to see my girl,” I tell Brad.
“Good, Lauren has class tonight so she is gonna meet me here. She called while you were taking a piss,” he says while grabbing money from his wallet and throwing it down.
“No, man. You aren't buying both,” I tell him.
“Yeah I am, this is a celebration. Just remember that later when you hold your girl. Everything happens for a reason.”
I sit in thought at what he just said and rub my hand down my face. Well shit, maybe he's right. She was already it for me, I guess we will have to see.
GETTING HOME FROM my day, I decide to just make myself some Ramen noodles and relax until Trent comes over. He called a little while ago to let me know he was swinging by his place to grab a bag of clothes and stuff he will need for work tomorrow, and then he'd be here. Sitt
ing on the couch, I prop my feet up on my coffee-table and sit with my dinner. Hey, I'm twenty-one, a student and I live alone, I can't afford to splurge on too much. “You do need to start eating better,” I tell myself. Sighing, I think of my afternoon.
After I returned from lunch, I saw I had a text from Amy asking how my day was going. I wonder if he called her. I texted her back that I would call her later, that my day was okay.
I had looked up to the sky for a moment to gather the feelings suddenly bubbling to the surface again. I knew I couldn’t cry there with everyone milling around at school. Couldn't deal with even talking to anyone right then.
Amy is Trent’s older sister. She has her own kids and husband, but she and I became fast and good friends. After class I called her back really quick before heading home. Trent hadn’t told her.
“So, he is coming over tonight to take your other test with you? Umm, does he think the results will change with his magical presence?”
I doubled over snorting with laughter at her comment. Leave it to Amy to bring the comedy and sass out in a situation that needs it.
“I think he wants to be part of it, I don't know,” I told her, composing myself. “I need him though. I need to know he is in this with me. Better to find out now that he isn't than later. I'm just so scared he isn't ready for this leap. I mean we aren't married, we aren't engaged, we don't live together. Hell, we've only been together two months, Amy,” I told her trying to relay my fears.
Her voice came through sweetly and friendly. “Well, my dear, he would be wise not to cross you out. Ahem, let me clarify. His manhood is on the line with this if you catch my drift,” she says and I can imagine her making scissor motions with her fingers.
Eyes wide, I laugh and can just imagine her going toe to toe with her brother.
“Thanks, honey. I will definitely be filling you in tomorrow. I'm not calling tonight to recap with him here, so don't get pissy when you don't hear from me, okay?”
“Ugh, fine,” she said, pretending to be put out.
“I better head over to Mrs. Beck and see what she has planned for me to do for the rest of the day,” I told her, going to hang up and headed toward my class I sat in the rest of the day.
“Later waddles,” she calls out, causing me to almost drop my phone as I was hanging up and give her my mean face. Then I realize she can't see it.
“What? That will be you by the end of the school year,” she said on a laugh.
Shaking my head, I just hit end. Snot.
***
Slowly opening my eyelids, I see Trent bent over me on the couch rubbing my face soothingly.
“Hi babe,” I say to him, slowly sitting up.
“You okay, sweetheart? I was calling your name for a few minutes, you were out pretty hard.”
“I'm sorry, I don't even remember laying down. I was sitting here waiting for you and had some noodles. I couldn't wait to see you,” I say, kissing his lips.
His kiss is warm, soft, and full of emotion as he grabs my face to pull me closer to him. I open my eyes to stare into his dark brown ones. Pulling back, I notice his dark hair array, as if he has been running his hand through it a lot today. I know that feeling of not knowing, but I'm unsure what has him edgy. He reeks of alcohol.
“Are you okay, babe? I mean I know I dropped a huge bomb on you today that neither of us expected, but you look so defeated. Are you upset with me? You didn't go drink too much, did you?
“Oh God, baby, no. You shocked me. I didn't know what to think first and I left early to go meet up with Brad,” he says while pulling me onto his lap.
Wrapping my arms around his neck and putting my forehead to his, I just breathe deeply.
“Go take your other test, baby. I want to be here with you when the results come up,” he says gently.
When I pull back with a puzzled look on my face, he just shakes his head and stands up with me still in his arms.
“I want to have a do-over. I want to pretend we did this together the first time like we should have,” he says, setting me on my feet outside the bathroom door.
“I wish you would have waited for me, talked to me before you did it alone, baby,” he says, squeezing me tightly and kissing the top of my head.
Being that he is 6'2 to my 5’5 petite frame, I am quite snuggled right against his heart that beats steadily under my cheek.
“I had to know, babe, I couldn't wait another minute to find out why I was feeling so weird. But I honestly wasn't expecting it to be this,” I tell him, hoping he believes me, placing a kiss to his heart.
Grabbing my hand, he pulls me into the bathroom and sees the other test still sitting on the counter. “Shall we get this party started, sweetheart?” he asks, lifting the box with the other test while chuckling to himself.
Grabbing it out of his hand, I give him a smirk and push him out of the bathroom.
“You aren't gonna be in here with me for the first part, babe. I love you but no way are you watching me pee on this thing. It's just awkward,” I tell him, scrunching up my face sourly.
Crossing his arms, he laughs. “Awkward, huh? I'd venture to say this is only the beginning of “awkward”,” he says using air quotes.
“Yeah well, it isn't starting today,” I tell him, kissing his lips while I start to close the door.
“Okay, okay.” He laughs, putting his hands up and retreating backwards as I close the door.
“I'll be right outside the door listening to you pee on it.”
“Yep, listen away, you aren't coming in until it's capped and on the counter for the countdown,” I tell him.
Feeling a sense of deja vu, I go round two with test number two. As soon as he hears the toilet flush, he bursts through the door with my egg timer in his hand.
“How long do we wait? I'll set the timer and we can look together,” he asks with an adorable look on his face.
Washing my hands, I look up into the mirror and catch his face in the reflection. “Three minutes,” I say, smiling while watching him set it and put it on the counter. Figures he sets it the right way.
“Let's go downstairs. I need to clean my dishes up anyway and it will be the perfect thing to keep my mind off the countdown,” I grab his hand and pulling him from the bathroom.
He follows me into the kitchen and just sits at the table while I load my bowl, pan, and fork into the dishwasher.
“I'm going to take a piss real quick, babe.” He gets up and heads upstairs to the bathroom.
“No peeking,” I yell over my shoulder, “you are so cheating right now.”
Laughing to himself he just shuts the door.
Drying my hands off, I go to the living room and sit on the couch until he comes down. My leg is going a mile a minute with nerves and I can't sit still. Why am I so jittery now? Like the results are going to suddenly change from this afternoon. I just don't know how this is going to pan out with us. Especially if he keeps going on the way he has been. Meeting with Brad was clearly more than ‘a drink’.
He comes down from the bathroom with his poker face on as we hear the timer ding. Grabbing my hand, he pulls me to him for a kiss and pulls me back upstairs. I take a deep breath and open my eyes to the two tests resting on the counter with identical pink lines. Looking up at him, I see him smirk.
“You already saw it, didn't you?”
“Yeah I did,” he says laughing.
I playfully punch him in the arm and walk back to the kitchen to grab a glass of water. My mouth is suddenly dry and all the emotions are flooding back that I did so well to hold away the rest of the day. Now he's here and it's real for us both with test number two.
“Baby,” he says behind me gently. “We need to talk about this. You can't hold yourself away from me.” He turns my chin toward him and looks me in the eyes.
Mine well up and my chin quivers as I really try to not lose it.
“I'm so scared,” I whisper to him while staring back up at his pleading eyes.
“What are you scared of, sweetheart, talk to me,” he pleads gently while wiping my tears with the pads of his thumbs.
“I'm so afraid of what will happen to us. We are so new to this relationship together. We both have so many things going on, and finding time together lately has already been difficult. I don't want this to be the final nail of something you can't handle in your already busy life,” I say through tears.
He smiles, bending down to frame my face gently with his hands. “I love you, Andrea. I'm in this with you and I'm not going anywhere, sweetheart,” he says, gently kissing my lips.
I wrap my arms around his neck and pull him in closer to me so that I can be flush up against him deepening the kiss.
He moans and pulls me tighter lifting me with my feet dangling from the floor. Giving one last gentle peck, he pulls back and looks me in the eyes, his dimples peeking through his gentle smile.
“No more tears, baby, no more worrying. I will talk to Brad and see when I can get out of my lease on the apartment with him and I will move in here with you by the time the baby is born. Of course we will still be staying together every night until then, but we will just take it one day at a time,” he says sweetly while running his nose against mine.
Of course it only causes the tears to fall again while I smile at his sweet words I needed so badly to hear.
“Thank you,” I say quietly.
Setting me back down so my feet are on the floor, he takes my hand and pulls me toward my bedroom. “I think we've had enough excitement and exhaustion for the day, sweetheart. Right now I just want to lay down with you and hold you.” He turns my bedroom light on. “Get up there and get cozy, I'm going to grab my bag and meet you right back in here.”
Into Your Hurricane Page 2