by Shelly Davis
“I just zoned out for a moment, sorry. My life has been such a whirlwind of change lately. I’m just getting used to the time change and everything at the garage, I think it all just caught up with me.” I grinned when I met his warm eyes. He was one of the sincerest people I’d ever met, and I found that it wasn’t hard for me to be genuine in return. All the people I’d met at Turner Racing were authentic. The people I knew in Ireland were so disingenuous, only looking for what you could give them.
“Where’s Dillon’s father?”
And there was the million-dollar question. I stared out the windshield, trying to organize my thoughts, in desperate need of a distraction. Once he threw me out of his office and told me not to return, I tried my best to forget about Conall and his connection to my son. Hell, I didn’t even tell my grandfather about him when he asked.
“He’s somewhere in Ireland.”
“Does he know Dil? Does he have contact with him?”
My eyes widened, and jaw fell slack. My silence must have been enough because he immediately backtracked. “Harlan, I’m so sorry. I was outta line.” He looked at Dillon and me, silent for a few moments. “So, how about the race on Sunday?”
I felt my heart crack just a bit at how awkward he now appeared as he tried to backpedal and change the subject. Perhaps I could let him into my world just a little, how bad could it be to have a real friend? I hadn’t ever really had one that I could rely on entirely. It could be kind of nice.
“No. He doesn’t even know about Dillon. I tried to tell him once, at the very beginning of my pregnancy, but he refused to speak to me. I haven’t seen him since.”
“What an asshole,” he growled. Shocked, my eyes flashed his way for a moment. I didn’t understand his outburst. The look of anger that crossed his face surprised me. He asked, “Have you dated since Dil was born?”
Again, I was stunned at his forward questions. No one had ever been so bold as to ask me about my life. Even the people I considered friends in Ireland hadn’t made such probing inquiries. Shockingly, I found that it felt good talking to Cade. I enjoyed his company and he was sweet to my son. He was also sincere, kind, and incredibly handsome. His warm cobalt blue eyes brought me a sense of calm, like he was a real friend.
“Not really, my life is about Dillon. I must be careful about who I allow into his world.” And if I wasn’t careful, we could both be crushed.
Chapter Ten
Cade
There had to be more to Harlan’s story than she let on. It seemed she was running away from something, whether it was her parents’ death or possibly her son’s father, she seemed afraid of what was in her past. Would she be able to let her guard down enough to allow someone to love her the way she deserved? I understood she lived her life for her son, but as my father always said, part of his job was keeping mom happy so that the family was happy. In my opinion, she needed someone to keep her happy.
For now, I wouldn’t ask any more probing questions. I gave her directions to the nearest grocery store. Once shopping was complete, and the food was dropped off at Harlan’s house, she drove back toward racing headquarters, back to my car. I didn’t want to leave them yet, we barely had time together. But I wasn’t going to push myself on her either.
“Momma?” Dillon asked, his little voice sounding tired again. “Momma? I’m hungry. Can we go get nuggets?”
I turned and looked at the little boy and saw the wide smile on his mother’s face. She may not have wanted to get pregnant, and she may not think much of his father, but she sure as hell loved this little boy with everything in her. It had to be confusing to love someone so much who resembled someone you hated. I couldn’t imagine how that must feel.
“Sure, sweetheart, we can go get nuggets. We just have to take Cade back.”
I sat there for a moment and wished I could spend just a little more time with them. I wasn’t sure exactly what it was, but I liked being around her and I loved being with her little boy. We hadn’t even been alone yet, but I enjoyed talking to her.
“If you don’t mind, I’m kind of hungry myself.” I looked at Dillon. “Would you mind if I took you somewhere kind of special for nuggets?”
Harlan glanced at Dillon and me as he started bouncing in his seat. “Yay, nuggets!”
“Are there special nuggets he’s lookin’ for or will any chicken product work?”
“He’s not picky,” Harlan said. “But you don’t have to do this. We have taken up enough of your time today. We can just go to the fast-food place and…”
I cut her off before she got any further. “First, no fast-food. That stuff will kill ya. And second, I don’t mind, I’d rather not eat dinner alone tonight.”
“You’d be eating alone?” Harlan asked. She looked in the rearview mirror at the little boy and winked. “Well, we can’t have that, right Dil?” She glanced at me and grinned. “So, where are we going?”
Dillon giggled and announced, “Dinner time.” All he cared about was getting his nuggets. I was falling for this little boy, and if I wasn’t careful, I could easily fall for his mother too.
I gave her directions to the historic district in Mooresville. We stopped in the parking lot of my brother’s restaurant, and Harlan looked around.
“This is a beautiful part of town. What restaurant are we going to?”
“This is my brother’s place.” I paused, opening my door. “Come-on, let’s go in and get a table.”
Eyes wide, Harlan looked around the eatery. “This place is gorgeous. This is your brother’s?”
“Welcome to Hanson’s.” The greeter looked up and met my eyes. “Cade, I’m sorry. Is Jake expecting you? I can take y’all back to the kitchen.”
“No thanks, Molly. We’d like a table out here tonight.”
“Sure thing. Follow me.” She gathered menus and a coloring book and crayons for Dillon. She set everything up and smiled. “What can I get y’all to drink tonight?”
“Chocolate milk for Dillon, and I’d like water,” Harlan said. Both ladies looked over at me. “Beer would be great, Molly. Thanks.”
Molly hustled away to get the drinks and to send the server our way.
Once she was gone, Harlan met my eyes with a question. “Do you usually eat in the kitchen?”
“Yes. It’s called the chef’s table. I usually eat back there with Jake. I’ve never brought anyone here before to have a reason to eat out here.”
“Hey,” Jake said walking up to our table. He met my eyes, then looked to my companions, and immediately crouched down and met Dillon’s eyes. “Hey, little buddy. How ya doin’?”
Dillon had seen Jake and I together once before, but the little man just sat there and stared at the two of us. He tilted his head, inspecting each of our faces. “Cade again?” Then he looked at me. “Cade?”
I let out a little snicker. “I’m Cade, buddy. This is my brother, Jake. We look a lot alike, don’t we?”
Little, pudgy hands reached out for Jake and me. The little boy looked carefully at each of us, touching our faces and hair. It seemed he was trying to figure out what the differences were. Jake and I both smiled as the little boy inspected our faces. Dillon immediately placed his little fingers on my cheek. I had a dimple that my brother didn’t have. One slight difference, but Dillon found it.
Looking at me with his finger still touching my dimple, Dillon asked, “Cade?”
“Yep, it’s me buddy.”
He then looked to Jake, “Who are you?”
Jake laughed at the little boy’s question. “I’m Jake. I’m Cade’s brother.”
“Jake,” Dillon said, emphasizing the k sound.
“What would you like to have to eat, Dil?” Jake asked.
“Nuggets, please,” Dillon announced proudly.
Jake looked to Harlan who beamed, watching the exchange closely. Her eyes shined brightly.
After our food was ordered and Jake went back to the kitchen, Harlan and I sat in silence as Dillon colored all over t
he coloring book he was given. I wanted to ask her more questions and get to know her better, but I didn’t want her to feel as though she was being interrogated. It was clear that her life sucked after her parents died. I wondered about Dillon’s father. If he found out about him, would he push to see his son? Would he try to incorporate himself back into her life? I couldn’t imagine having her, then losing her. If she were mine, I’d never let her go. Once she was mine, she would be mine forever.
“I love this place,” Harlan said quietly as she looked around the room. Her voice drew me back to the here and now. “It’s beautiful and so homey.”
“The previous owner passed away about a year ago,” I explained. “When our friend Monique was brought in by the family to sell it, she immediately thought it was perfect for Jake. After months of waitin’ and dealin’ with their family drama, we finally signed the papers.
“The owner had recently remodeled most of the building, makin’ this the easiest decision Jake and I have ever made.”
“So, the two of you own a gym and a restaurant, you train pit crews, you’re a physical therapist, and now you’re working on a pit crew. Is there anything you don’t do?” Harlan stared at me in amazement as she swirled her straw around in her ice water.
Laughing a little, I observed Dillon’s coloring as I thought how to answer this question. It did sound like a lot; most people didn’t go through such a variety of jobs. “The gym and physical therapy kind of go together. And now I get to live out my childhood dream of workin’ on a pit crew.”
“Look, momma,” Dillon announced, holding up his coloring page with a huge smile.
Harlan immediately looked to her son, love reflected in her beautiful eyes. “It’s beautiful, baby.”
“Nice picture, little man. Can I hang that on my fridge in my kitchen?” Jake asked, stopping by our table with the waiter.
Dillon picked up the entire coloring book and handed it to Jake. “My picture is good?” Dillon asked.
“Yes, it is,” Jake said. “How about you come into my kitchen with me to help me hang it up while your nuggets cool off a bit.”
Arms outstretched, Dillon reached for Jake instantly. Before picking him up, Jake looked to Harlan for permission. “If it’s okay with your mommy.”
“Um, are you sure it’s safe?” Harlan asked, apprehension flashed in her eyes.
“I’ll keep him safe and bring him right back. He won’t leave my side,” Jake assured her.
It wasn’t the first time I saw that worry flit across her eyes. She seemed to have the same concern when I left the dealership with Dillon to return the rental car. I was surprised when she agreed to let me take him.
Harlan sighed and agreed. “Just be good and listen to Jake.”
“He’ll be okay,” Jake assured her.
Picking the little boy out of his seat, Jake and Dillon disappeared into the kitchen doors, leaving Harlan and I alone.
“Thanks for all your help today. I would have never gotten everything accomplished without you.”
“My pleasure.” I paused, taking a bite of my burger. “Do you have everything you need? We could take care of the rest tomorrow.”
“Actually, I’m going shopping with Toni and Mia tomorrow.”
“Who’s gonna watch Dil?” I asked curiously. “Is your grandfather back in town?”
“No, his head mechanic got hurt, so he’s going to be stuck there for a while. I’m going to take Dillon with me.”
“I could watch him while y’all shop if you want. Dil and I can hang out at my place, or yours, so y’all can shop in peace. I can’t imagine it would be easy to shop with a four-year-old.”
“I couldn’t ask you to do that.” She looked torn, like she wanted to let me watch him, but she didn’t know how to let go. I knew she couldn’t trust anyone in her past, I hoped she’d learn to trust people in her present.
“You didn’t ask, I offered. Besides, it’ll give me somethin’ to do after we load the cars tomorrow. Otherwise, I’ll just go to the gym and work some more. Really, you’ll be doin’ me a huge favor by makin’ me chill.”
She sat there and seemed to think long and hard about my offer. Her hands clasped tightly on the table and there was concern in her eyes as she looked everywhere, but at me. Come on, Harlan, trust. Trust in me. I silently willed her to have faith that I wasn’t going to hurt her or Dillon.
A resolved look came across her face, like this was a difficult decision. I understood how difficult it must be to be in a strange place, surrounded by people she didn’t know. History has taught her not to trust, and here we all were, asking her to trust us. It must have been difficult. Her hesitance was enough to show her worry.
“Um, sure, that would be great, and Dil would love it. It would be better if you come over and watch him. I mean, since all his things are at our house.”
“Sounds like a plan.” She was trusting me, it was a great feeling.
She looked down and watched her fork push the food around the plate. She whispered, “Thank you, Cade.”
***
The next morning, I rushed around the garage trying to help both teams prepare for this weekend’s race. Both trucks were loaded with equipment, tools, extra parts, uniforms, and whatever else we thought we might need to get through the weekend. Every week was the same, we tried to make sure we were prepared for any possible issue, but we were always afraid that something was missing. I was sure it was just our paranoia of not being able to fix a simple issue because of negligence, but it was still a frustrating feeling. Regardless, by noon, both haulers were fully loaded and ready to pull away for the next race.
“Awesome job, fellas,” Axel announced. “Get your itinerary from Margie and head on home. See y’all at the track tomorrow.” He paused a moment and announced, “Cade, come on over here for a minute.”
Walking over to Axel, I didn’t know what to expect. Was he not happy with the pit crews? Was I not doing well enough as the front tire changer? Times were better than ever, and were steadily improving, but what if it wasn’t enough? I was finally happy with what I was doing, I wasn’t ready to lose it.
“What’s up, boss?”
“First, I wanted to tell you, you’re doin’ an excellent job as both the trainer and front tire changer. Kyle’s pit times have never been so good, and neither have Lou’s, it’s impressive.
“Thanks, I’m glad y’all are happy.”
“I was skeptical at first, but Toni always does seem to know what she’s talkin’ about.” He paused for a moment. “Now, the second thing I wanted to talk to you about is your flight, you won’t be flyin’ with everyone else, you’ll be on my private jet. It seems Kyle and Toni prefer to be able to discuss pit strategies with you before everyone else. It apparently also helps Lou.”
“Okay, no problem. Is that all?” I was worried, he eyed me carefully and in his hesitation seemed to be considering his next words carefully.
“Well, no. Actually, I noticed you leavin’ with Harlan yesterday. I guess I just want to know if there was potential to be a problem there.”
“I’m not sure what you’re askin’ me, Axel. I helped her buy a car, took her and Dillon grocery shoppin’, and we went to dinner. Why would there be a problem?”
Axel seemed to study me for a few moments. It reminded me of a father trying to read the intentions of a man who comes to court his daughter. “Well son, it’s clear you like the girl, and the two teams work very closely. I’d hate to see y’all date and have a fallin’ out. That would cause a lot of turmoil in the garage.”
Annoyance and frustration bubbled in my gut, but I pushed it down and composed my thoughts before I spoke. “No offence, Axel, but it’s really none of your business. I know how to be professional. If it will ease your mind, nothin’ has happened, yet.”
He nodded. “Yet. So, you do intend on pursuin’ somethin’ with Harlan?”
“If she was interested, and we could make it work, absolutely. It is completely up to her
. If she’s attracted to me, and she shows me, then I would definitely be interested.”
Axel was quiet again for several moments, seeming to choose his words. “She’s a good girl, and a good driver. I’d hate to see someone distract her, or hurt her and that little boy.”
“That won’t happen,” I said forcefully.
He nodded once more. “Yeah. I see that now. Okay, Cade, I just wanted to make sure you were bein’ genuine. We haven’t had a moment for me to be able to read you, but I see it now. You don’t play games.”
“No,” I said, “I don’t.”
***
Standing in front of Harlan’s place, I knocked and waited for her to answer. I was nervous suddenly. I didn’t know if it was because I had never really been alone with a little kid before, or if it was seeing her outside of the garage. Perhaps both. Dillon was a great kid, and I had no doubt that things would be great, but I was unexpectedly worried too. What was I thinking volunteering to care for the boy by myself? Yeah, I’d taken care of him yesterday, but he was sleeping. This would be different.
My fears vanished the moment Harlan opened the door. Her gorgeous auburn hair was pulled into a messy bun. Her long, shapely legs were encased in skin-tight leggings and a tee shirt that hugged her beautiful curves perfectly. Damn, this woman could wear anything and still be gorgeous.
“Hello, Cade. Come in. Are you sure you still want to do this?” Harlan’s Irish accent flowed all around and through me. I loved her voice, accent, everything about her. “I can always …” Her thought interrupted by the high-pitched shout of a little person.
“Cade!” Dillon squealed as he ran to the door. “You here to play with me?” Not giving me a chance to answer, he grabbed my hand and started pulling me to the middle of the living room where his toys sat. He plopped in the middle of hundreds of oversized connecting blocks. He reached up toward me with blocks in his tiny hands. “You make a house?”