Not bad, Luke thought. And you don’t have to get up before dawn. He turned the page again, and his eyes widened at the headline DEBUT FLIGHT OF WEDDING CAKE BALLOON. Luke read the article about a couple who had custom ordered a special-shaped wedding cake balloon. At 300,000 cubic feet, it was the largest special-shaped balloon ever built. The husband and wife were both balloon pilots and were starting a new business. They planned to travel across the country with the balloon and be hired out for weddings—either to bring a wedding party up in the air for the actual ceremony or have a bride and groom leave their reception in the balloon.
“Nora, look at this.”
“Yes, dear.” Nora looked up again. She was used to these interruptions. Luke got restless on airplanes, and even though they were sitting in first class, his six-foot-five frame never seemed to settle in.
“Here’s a story about the couple who own the wedding cake balloon. It’s making its debut in Albuquerque. And it’s the largest special-shaped balloon ever built.”
“It is?” Nora asked with alarm in her voice.
“Yes.”
“I don’t like the idea of Regan going up in a balloon that is brand new and so big.”
“I’m surprised it doesn’t mention anything about Danny’s show,” Luke remarked.
“These articles have long lead times. I have the idea that Danny’s show wasn’t conceived until very recently.” Nora leaned over and looked at the picture of the smiling couple. Her lips moved as she read, “‘Randy Jupiter and Alice Mars Jupiter met at a society for people named after planets. They both have a special affinity for the universe at large and decided to pursue the sport of hot air ballooning. Together they became pilots, and they go ballooning whenever possible. When Alice’s elderly aunt, Venus Mars, passed over to the great beyond and left her niece a tidy inheritance, Randy and Alice asked themselves what they wanted to do with the rest of their lives. Their passion for balloons guided them. They decided to quit their jobs and spend their time up, up, and away. The Jupiters had the wedding cake balloon specially designed and are looking forward to attending balloon festivals and weddings all over the country. Flying the balloon in Hawaii is one of their dreams, as they’re sure plenty of newlyweds honeymooning on the lush islands would love to ride in the balloon and take home pictures of themselves in an eight-story wedding cake.’ ” Nora looked up at Luke. “Aunt Venus must have left them a lot of money.”
“Must have.”
“I still don’t like the idea of Regan going up in that balloon.”
Luke patted her shoulder. “We’ll call her when we land. I’m sure everything will be just fine.”
“I don’t know. Danny’s show has been having so much trouble…” She hesitated. The plane started to experience turbulence.
A flight attendant’s voice came over the sound system. “The captain has advised us that we’re hitting a bumpy patch, so please make sure your seat belts are fastened.”
“A bumpy patch,” Nora muttered. “It reminds me of a balloon landing.”
“Don’t worry, dear. Regan will be fine. This couple sounds interesting. I’m anxious to meet them.”
“As long as the meeting takes place on the ground,” Nora insisted, “on planet Earth.”
46
“W e’ll leave you be, dear,” Maddy told Danny. “We’re going to lie out by the pool at our hotel. It’s not the most luxurious pool, but it’ll do.”
“Be careful, would you? It’s hot out there today,” Danny warned.
“I’ll do my best to see that we have a quiet day,” Shep assured his son.
“I’ll call you later,” Maddy announced as they walked toward the door. “Regan, it’s so good to see you. How are your parents?”
“They’re fine. Thanks.”
“Are they in New Jersey now?”
“No, they’re actually on their way to Santa Fe.”
“Really?”
“Yes. We may see them at the balloon fiesta in Albuquerque on Friday morning.”
“Shep, we should go to that!”
“Come on, Maddy,” Shep snapped.
“Bye, all,” Maddy called as she disappeared.
Aunt Agony looked at Danny with sympathy. “Are you an only child?”
“I have a sister in Maine.”
“God is good,” Agony whispered.
“Agony, I need to get some breakfast,” Heartburn stated impatiently.
“So do I. Don’t you think my stomach is growling? I’ve been too worried to eat. Now that things are settled, I’d like to have a nutritious breakfast. We have a lot to cover with those contestants today.” Agony started for the door. “See you folks downstairs at ten.”
When the door shut behind them, Danny flopped onto the couch. “I’m worn out, and we haven’t even turned on the camera yet.”
“Well, Danny, you dodged a big bullet. Now let’s just hope Elsa finds her way home.”
“Why does everything keep going wrong?” Danny whined.
Regan looked thoughtful. “Danny, there’s something fishy going on. I’m glad we’re going to Roscoe’s tonight. I’m anxious to get the lay of the land, so to speak. I also want to get a load of those sitcom people.”
“Bubbles is a trip,” Danny noted. “She’s as competitive as they get.”
Regan looked at her watch. “I’m going to my room to make a phone call.”
“Are you calling Mr. Reilly?” Danny teased.
“As a matter of fact, yes. I didn’t get to talk to him this morning. Once I ran into Barney, that was it. Jack was going to see what he could find out about Roscoe, if anything.”
“Okay. I’ll be down in the lobby.”
Regan went back to her room. Naturally, the maid was in there making the bed. I’ll never be able to make this call, Regan despaired. It feels as though I’ll never get a chance to talk to Jack.
“Hello,” the maid greeted Regan in a heavily accented voice as she pulled the spread up under the pillows.
“Hello.” Regan could see that the maid hadn’t cleaned the bathroom yet. “Do you think you could come back in a little while? I have to make a phone call.”
The maid stared at her blankly.
Regan pantomimed making a phone call.
“Okay.” The maid pulled a Cherry Chap Stick out of her pocket and applied it to her lips. “I come back.” She walked out as she ran the Chap Stick around her lips one more time.
Regan remembered the Cherry Chap Stick on the floor of Maddy and Shep’s room. Well, it’s dry out here, Regan reasoned. Everyone gets chapped lips. Regan sat on the bed and reached for the receiver, but something stopped her. I’ll use my cell phone, she decided. Even though the reception would be better on the land line, she chose to use her cell. She dialed Jack’s number quickly.
“Regan!” he answered, picking up immediately. “How are you?”
“Oh, Jack, you wouldn’t believe it.”
“I’m sure I won’t.” He laughed. “Don’t tell me. You won big money, and you’re running off with someone else.”
Regan giggled. “No, I didn’t win any money but the contestant who hit the jackpot is on the loose.” Regan filled him in on that story and the mail saga.
“It sounds like you’re earning your pay. Are you sure you’re going to be free by Friday night?”
“Definitely,” Regan insisted. “Friday night I’m with you.”
“I’m certainly glad to hear that.”
“Did you find anything out about the contestants?” Regan asked him.
“Without Social Security numbers, it’s tough. But that Roscoe is some character.”
“Do tell.”
“He’s been married three times. He owned a coal mine, a bar, and a dry cleaning chain, and has been involved in various business ventures along the way. Nothing illegal. He’s smart and rich, but he’s a loose cannon. He reinvents himself and enjoys his reputation for being outrageous. He’s very fond of gambling and has businesses in several cities
with casinos. First he rented out catamarans at a marina near Atlantic City. Then he bought a ski rental place in Lake Tahoe. He moved to Las Vegas and got into the balloon business. He started the cable TV station and bought all that land for his cable headquarters. Supposedly he really wants to make a name for himself with his television channel.”
“How did you find this out?”
“One of my guys here has a contact out in Las Vegas.”
“Well, I definitely think Roscoe is pushing the envelope this week. We’re having dinner at his house tonight. It should be interesting.”
“Regan. I don’t like spending so much time away from you.”
“I don’t like it, either, Jack,” Regan said softly.
“Last night I had two slices of pizza and went to sleep.”
“I had pizza, too. At the bar at Carlotta’s, a second-rate Italian restaurant, while two of the contestants were having their dream date upstairs.”
“I think we need a few dream dates.” Jack chuckled.
“Not at Carlotta’s,” Regan assured him.
“I’ll think something up for this weekend.”
When Regan hung up, she smiled and sighed. Three thousand miles is too far apart to live, she thought. She got up, brushed her teeth, and freshened her makeup. It was almost ten o’clock. She hurried downstairs where most of the group had gathered. Barney was seated on a couch in the lobby. The others were standing around him.
“I couldn’t be alone,” he told Regan.
Sam was there, recording the contestants’ movements. His camera was focused on Barney, sitting forlornly on the couch. Victor and Danny were on the side, going over the notes on Victor’s clipboard. Chip and Vicky and Bill and Suzette were whispering among themselves about the missing Elsa, while doing their best to look very much in love. Agony and Heartburn stepped off the elevator a few minutes later, hand in hand.
“It looks as if we’re ready to go,” Danny instructed the group. “Barney, I’m sorry. We’ll be in touch with you. Let’s hope Elsa returns soon.”
Barney nodded grimly. He looked like so many of the saddened contestants on the reality shows, contestants who had gotten the boot. “I’m going to wait here till Elsa gets back,” he announced stoically.
You may be waiting until the cows come home, Regan thought.
Suddenly the front door to the hotel flung open. A dazed and bedraggled Elsa entered the lobby, hundred-dollar bills sticking out of her pockets. Barney jumped up and ran to her, his arms outstretched. It was a reunion that made lost Lassie’s homecoming with his master, Timmy, seem positively coldhearted.
“You’re back!” Barney cried. “I can’t believe you’re safe!”
“I don’t know what happened,” Elsa confessed, looking confused. “All I knew was that I had to get back here. Back to you. Back by ten o’clock.”
Sam was taping the whole scene.
Suzette looked as if she wanted to throw a punch at someone. “I’m sick of this!” she growled under her breath to Bill. “This is unfair! We don’t have a chance! Those two are doing everything they can to get attention!”
I agree, Regan thought. I totally agree.
47
T he Take Me Higher group gathered around the conference table in their office at the Balloon Channel. Back to the scene of the crime, Bubbles reflected. She’d called her boyfriend this morning to complain about the latest additions to the cast.
“Cheer up,” he advised. “Danny’s going crazy. One of the contestants is missing.”
That news had made Bubbles’s day. “Then there’s a chance we’ll win by default!” she’d replied excitedly.
“I wouldn’t go that far. Danny is already thinking of ways to proceed if she’s gone to that great casino in the sky.”
“Sweetie!” Bubbles had cried.
“I’m just kidding. I’m sure this woman is fine. She won big money last night and is probably out on a bender.”
“I just hope she stays away long enough to ruin the show.”
Bubbles’s cell phone vibrated in her pocket when she was riding in the van from the hotel. She checked the caller ID but didn’t answer. When they all piled out at the Balloon Channel, she read the text message on her phone.
It read: The contestant hath returned.
Now she was in a really bad mood.
“Here we are,” James announced cheerfully as everyone took the seats they had occupied the day before. “I woke up this morning, and I thought to myself: I can’t believe how lucky I am. I am going to work as an actor today, and I’m actually getting paid for it.”
“It is amazing,” Pilot Pete agreed. “Absolutely amazing.”
“Remarkable,” Loretta added. “And from now on I’d like you all to call me by my character’s name, Grandma. I want to play the role perfectly so that I’ll really feel like Grandma on Friday.
Grandma’s boyfriend, Hal, frowned. “I don’t want to call you Grandma. That doesn’t sound very romantic to me.”
“You can call me Loretta. But only you.”
“I’m really glad you’re all getting into your parts,” Bubbles interrupted. “But there’s one thing you should all know. Roscoe called me this morning. He has a couple of actors he wants to add to the show.”
Pilot Pete turned bright red. “What?”
Bubbles stared at him. This is why I waited to tell him until now, she thought. Safety in numbers. The guy was scary. She tried to remain calm. There was no use letting them know how upset she was. “Yes. A young couple from Los Angeles who came to Las Vegas to get married. Noel and Neil are working on ways to squeeze them in with just a couple of lines.”
“Make them extras!” Grandma cried. “That’s all they deserve!”
“Noel and I are working to preserve the integrity of all your roles,” Neil assured her.
“We want Roscoe to be happy with us,” Bubbles reminded everyone. “So let’s all put on a cheerful front and do the best we can.” She started passing around copies of the revised script. “This will obviously be changed again, but let’s do a read through. Roscoe told me he was going to bring the new actors over here this morning to meet us.”
“I certainly hope they can act,” James said, looking from one to the other for approval.
“Yeah.” Pete stared back at him. “There’s nothing worse than having to work with a bad actor.”
James threw his hands into the air. “I totally agree.”
“Let’s start, shall we?” Bubbles asked through clenched teeth. If Pete doesn’t kill James by the end of the week, then I just might.
Up in his office, Roscoe stared at the televisions on his wall, a huge grin on his face. “I knew adding this couple to the mix would drive them crazy,” he exclaimed to Erene and Leo who were sitting across the desk from him. Kitty was back at the house in the Jacuzzi, still trying to get warm.
“I’m glad you believe in equal opportunity crazy-making,” Leo noted. “You’ve certainly done enough to Danny.”
“As I’ve told you a hundred times before, when life throws you lemons, make lemonade. Competition is what brings out the best in us. And, besides, not all of Danny’s troubles have been my fault. Did you get the torches for tonight?”
“Yes,” Erene replied. “The backyard will have that reality show feeling.”
“Good. I love that. And we’ll roast marshmallows.”
“We’ll roast marshmallows.”
“Erene, are Kimberly and Jake downstairs?”
“Yes. They’re in the greenroom downstairs waiting for you to take them to meet Bubbles and the gang.”
The station had a greenroom that had yet to see the likes of any real stars. Roscoe’s shows were just getting off the ground, and his viewership was small. But he believed they would prevail. It was only a matter of time before Oscar-winning actors and directors would be rubbing shoulders in there, “fighting over the cheese and crackers,” as he put it.
“I’ll see you folks tonight,” Roscoe an
nounced. “After I make these introductions, I’m going home to rest up for the party.”
Erene and Leo were both relieved. “We’ll be here,” Leo told his boss. “See you later.”
Roscoe found Kimberly stretched out on the couch in the greenroom, fast asleep. Jake was in the chair next to her, lightly tapping a pen against the coffee table.
“Hi, Roscoe,” Jake whispered.
“Look at that sleeping beauty.”
“She is a beauty, isn’t she?” Jake said reverentially.
“She’s a knockout.”
Jake gently woke Kimberly, and the threesome walked over to the Take Me Higher offices. Roscoe knocked on the door of the conference room. Bubbles answered quickly. When she got a look at Kimberly, she wanted to scream. I’m supposed to be the babe on this show! she thought furiously. It was all she could do not to slam the door in her flawless face.
48
I t didn’t take Regan long to realize that Elsa was more than a little bit tipsy. Her words were slurred, and she was unsteady on her feet. Her hair was uncombed, and her clothes were rumpled, even allowing for the fact that she’d left them in a pile on the floor the night before. When Danny ordered Sam to stop shooting, he addressed the group. “Chip, Vicky, Suzette, and Bill, why don’t you all get into the van with Agony and Heartburn? Sam and Victor will bring you over to the studio. Regan and I will wait here with Barney until Elsa is ready to leave.”
Who knows how long that could take? Regan wondered.
“What happened to you anyway?” Suzette blurted out. The others all waited, frozen in place, for Elsa’s answer.
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