by Claire Marta
Gabriel sighs. “He’s more than likely dead now after you killed Talia.”
The truth of his words pierces the cocoon I’ve been living in. Pain squeezes inside me. So strong I almost lose the ability to breathe.
“I still have to finish this.” I barely manage to get out.
“Staying here with Lucifer is a mistake. You can’t face Trukun. Not like this, after what just happened.”
“Mistake or not, it’s my decision to make, not yours.”
He’s wrong. I can, and I will. I’ve always been a fighter. I’m not the type to sit around and let someone else win my battles. Someone who acts strong, but has someone else do their dirty work. My hands will be bathed in the blood of my enemies before I am through. I will revel in their downfall.
“Mavi.”
There’s a note of pleading in his tone.
He won’t sway me from my path. Not now.
Before he can say anymore, I storm from the room, needing to escape.
A chain reaction ricochets through me. Reanimating every cell, I thought I had lost the power to feel. It’s too much at once. How can it still be so over powering? I thought I’d emptied out everything I had bottled inside while in the shower.
“Mavi, wait up!”
Hearing Snatch’s voice behind me is the last thing I need. Glancing over my shoulder, I find Leo hot on his heels.
“You should go home with Gabriel.”
“Where you go, we go.” He tells me firmly. Eyes bright and clear, he’s still far too pale, his gaunt frame swamped by an oversized baggy brown sweatshirt. It looks like the detox did him good. He’s lost that sickly look he’s always worn.
“It’s too dangerous here.”
Leo halts, giving me a ‘do you really think we don’t know that’ look. Shirt bright, flowery, and pink, it’s more rumpled and creased than his usual snazzy prim facade as if he’s gotten dressed in a hurry. His eyebrows are hiked up into his hairline. “All the more reason we stay, especially with you shacking up with the Devil.”
“I’m not—”
“Whatever game he’s still playing, we have your back” he continues, cutting me off.
They’re both determined. I can see it in the set of their expressions. They won’t back off no matter what I say. I don’t have the heart to tell them I probably won’t be coming back from this.
“Guys...”
Leo pulls me in for a full-on bear hug. “Caesar’s dead and you don’t show any emotion over it. Christ, he was our friend too. You don’t have to pretend. We’re hurting over losing him too. Showing it won’t make you weak.”
My composure ruptures through the holes already inflicted. Unable to stay stiffly in his embrace, I squeeze him tightly in return.
“I can’t lose you too.” It’s a whisper. Hoarse and hesitant. I’ve never been good with things like this. Pushing them away is my instinctive thing to do, but I know these bastards aren’t going to let me.
Another set of arms wrap around me from behind. “Good, because we don’t want you to get your arse killed either.” Snatch murmurs, holding me just as securely.
We stand there sandwiched together. Three bodies giving and receiving comfort. Saying, without the need for words, that we have a connection no matter what the future brings.
“I didn’t realise you were into this hippy hug it out shit.” Raziel’s voice is filled with amusement from behind. “Personally, I think a good fuck solves most problems.”
Leo and Snatch’s laughter vibrate through my skin, making me smile.
“Raziel, can you find rooms for my friends?”
“The boss isn’t going to like that.”
Untangling myself, I rake the hair which has fallen into my eyes away with a hand. “Right now, I don’t care what the fuck he likes or thinks.”
Releasing a long suffering sigh, the fallen angel beckons to them with one thick finger. “It’s probably safer if you both share. Don’t go wandering around if you want your limbs to remain attached. I have enough to do without cleaning up your corpses.”
“Cass! Are you ok?”
Snatch’s excited voice catches my attention.
Poking her nose out of a door further along the corridor, Cassandra stands, observing us in a pair of faded jeans and an oversized yellow sweatshirt. For someone who was abducted by the monarch of Hell she looks well rested and unharmed.
She nods, giving us a quizzical expression. “Of course I am. Why wouldn’t I be?”
“Maybe because the Devil kidnapped you and is holding you hostage.” Snatch points out, giving the fallen angel a nervous sideways glance.
Throwing the door wider, her eyes light up as she gives him an eager grin. “Raz, I need more pizza.”
Raziel snorts in response to her request. “You know the deal. Tell me those race results and I’ll order you another one with everything you like on top.”
“You’re using her to cheat?” Not exactly what I had imagined Lucifer and his right-hand man to use an all-seeing oracle for. I thought he’d be more imaginative.
With a sniff, Raziel folds his brawny arms defensively across his chest. “She sees the future. It isn’t cheating. All I’m getting is a little celestial tip off. It’s not like we haven’t done this before.”
Fishing out his metal hip flask, Leo scrunches up his nose. “You risked the wrath of heavenly angels, so you could win some extra cash? Which isn’t even the currency you use in the seven Hell dimensions.”
Shifting on his feet, Raziel flexes his mighty black wings. “I can already see you’re going to be a pain in my arse.” He grumbles before setting off down the corridor. “You better keep up. If you get lost I am not coming to look for you dipshits.”
Chapter Thirty-Two
“We should all say something about him.” Snatch mumbles, jiggling his knee nervously as he sits forward in his chair. “Mavi.”
I stare back mutely, my throat tightening up before I even attempt to speak. What can I say? This spur of the minute memorial was not my idea. Yet we need to mourn Caesar’s death. He was one of our own. A member of the team. It’s something we can’t ignore because even if I try it won’t bring him back.
Pressing back farther into the wall, I avoid Snatch’s expectant gaze and examine Cassandra’s room for the millionth time. It’s cosy. Well lived in with all the creature comforts of home. Not what you would expect of a prison cell.
Flipping open the pizza box on the worn coffee table, Leo grabs a hot greasy slice. “Fine, I’ll fucking start. He had no sense of style, but I loved him all the same. I’ll miss the bastard.” As he finishes his sentence, he takes a bite.
Cass sits across the room watching us with a sombre expression. She’s barely spoken a word since inviting us in. There’s a nervous air around her and I can’t help noticing the way her attention keeps bouncing my way.
Maybe she doesn’t like me after what happened or perhaps I scare the shit out of her. I don’t know. Frankly, I’m frightened of myself and what I’m becoming.
“I remember the first day I met him.” The words are so quiet they’re almost a whisper, but I still keep talking because if I stop I am not sure I will get them all out. “He sat there in the pub watching me for over an hour before we were introduced. I thought he was one of the regular weirdos. I hated him at first. It had always been me and my Uncle before I struck out on my own. When Gabriel recruited me, I thought I would still be going solo which I’d gotten used to. That didn’t last long. Caesar tried his damn best from day one to get under my skin. Always cheerful, friendly. He made acting indifferent harder over time even though I tried my hardest not to let him through my armour.” Everything’s spilling out now so fast I don’t have a fucking chance to stop. “Then you two joined our little band and I had no way to stop you from touching my heart. You became my brothers. My family. Even though you don’t know it. You’re closer to me than my own blood.”
I want to say Caesar is in a better place. At peace. But
what the fuck do I really know? He was a demon. They don’t have souls like humans. For them, Heaven as an afterlife was never in the equation. Maybe it’s somewhere I’m not destined for either. With my mixed parentage I no longer know where I stand.
Snatch looks like he’s about to get up to give me a hug, but I shake my head. I’m still falling apart. If he touches me I won’t be strong and that’s something I'm clinging to right now.
“Caesar was there for me when I overdosed.” He suddenly admits, playing with a thread sticking loosely from his baggy jumper. At the rate he’s tugging it’s going to unravel all over the floor.
His confession snaps me out of my melancholy. “When the fuck did this happen?”
It’s always been a fear that we’d lose him to his addiction. The talks we’ve all had with him about getting clean have led nowhere.
“About a year ago. If he hadn’t found me when he did, I wouldn’t be sitting here with you now. He got me to the hospital. Took care of me. I owed him big time and he never wanted anything in return.”
“Christ, Snatch.” Leo mutters, unable to keep the shock from his tone. “You both never said anything.”
Our friend shifts uncomfortably in his seat, looking shame faced beneath a mop of untidy hair. “I asked him not to and he kept that promise. He was good like that. Loyal. Caring.”
Quietly, I move and take the spare seat next to Cass on the shabby sofa. “He was always there for us one way or another.”
“An unofficial Dad.” Leo’s smile is fond, but sad as he polishes off his pizza. “He took me home more times than I can count after getting so dunk I couldn’t walk. Shit faced, mouthy,
you guys know I’m not always easy to deal with like that, but he had the patience of a fucking saint.”
Wiping greasy hands together, he takes another slice.
Realising our telekinetic isn’t stopping anytime soon the rest of us dive for our own pieces.
I’m hungry. Can’t even remember what I ate for my last meal. I’ve been working on autopilot so long it’s something easy to forget until I crash.
Taking a bite out of the end, I savour the cheesy tomato flavour. How Raziel got takeaway down here in Hell I have no idea. I can’t imagine they have a pizza place around the corner.
The four of us eat in silence for a while. It’s companionable. All of us lost in thoughts of the friend we lost. Our pain shared and evident along with the love we feel.
Leo tugs a beer can free of a cardboard box on the floor. “Mavi, you might have the cold-blooded killer down to a tee, but we can see you care about us Puddin’ even if you don’t want us to see it. We know you better than you think we do. So did Caesar.”
I catch the can as he tosses it to me. Bending back the ring, it opens easily.
Snatch catches the second one more clumsily.
“To Caesar, wherever he may be.” Leo salutes, raising his own to his lips.
In union, we hold up our own.
“To Caesar.”
“Caesar.”
Chapter Thirty-Three
Singing to myself softly, I stagger down the gloomy passageway. I haven’t drunk nearly enough. The stash of beer in Cassandra’s room didn’t last long between me and Leo. Turning it into a drinking contest was probably not the best idea. The fucker drinks fast. Can hold more liquor than me.
It went some way though to restoring the feeling of detachment. I want more. Thirst for it. Addiction has never been my problem in the past. Nothing beyond my bloodlust and
depraved urges. I’ve seen what happens to Leo and Snatch when they give in to their own personal demons of drink and pills. Witnessed the havoc. Yet, right now all I can think about is numbing my brain more before it wears off. I can’t get high so getting wasted is the next best thing. Reminiscing about Caesar and old times has brought pain back I no longer want to feel. I’ve never had to deal with so much before. Never put myself in the position to experience it for anyone but my brother.
Beyond the windows I pass, winter still has her frozen claws embedded into the land. If it’s any indication Cade hasn’t been successful saving the world. On any other day, I would pick up the reins. Right now, getting smashed out of my skull is at the forefront of my mind.
I’m not anyone's saviour. The world needs a superhero not my sorry arse.
Not for the next few hours at least. All I crave is to drown my sorrows.
Seeing a door, I wander inside. A kitchen. The three demon bitches I saw when I first arrived back in this Hell dimension are having a cosy get together around a wooden table. Barely clothed, what they are wearing is gossamer thin and transparent, showing off their nubile bodies.
The nearest one hisses aggressively the moment she sees me. Of course, it’s the blonde who gave Lucifer a blow job.
A spark of jealousy ignites before I can squash it. Snatching up a knife from its block, I don’t even have second thoughts letting it loose. Her shriek of agony makes me grin.
Hand splayed, she tries to stem the flow of blood from where it’s embedded in her slender naked shoulder.
Taking another, I test the sharpness with a finger. “The next one of you to give me attitude loses an ear.”
I’m all out of fucks. Right now, I’d happily slice their necks open from ear to ear if they choose to disrespect me. I’m no push over. I don’t know them, and they don’t know me. But if I'm stuck here I’m setting some motherfucking ground rules before they get any bright ideas.
Scrambling off their chairs, they flee, carrying their wounded friend between them as they race from the room.
Swaying slightly from side to side, I spy the bottles of wine that have been left abandoned. Jack pot.
“You’re going to drive away all the castle whores.”
Looking over my shoulder I find Raziel lurking by the fridge. His massive wings are nowhere in sight. Seeing him dressed in furs all the time like some hunky prehistoric hunter makes me wonder how sexy he would look in a pair of jeans.
“Not my problem.” Taking a bottle that has already been opened, I take a sip. Something fruity and alcoholic meets my taste buds. Not my usual choice of beverage, but it will do. Humming in approval, I chug what’s left down to the last drop.
“You might be getting screwed by the Boss, but that doesn’t mean you’re going to ruin my sex life because my booty call looks at you the wrong way. How much of that have you had?”
“Still not enough to make me forget all the shit I’m neck deep in.” Plonking my arse down on a breakfast stool, I almost miss it completely. “Where’s the rest? Don’t you drink in this place?”
Rolling the empty wine bottle across the table top, I giggle.
Closing the distance, Raziel snatches the cork screw up as I attempt to reach for it with an unsteady hand.
“I think I should do that. The way you’re going you’re likely to stab yourself.” Patiently, he pops the next one open with a flourish. “You really need to snap out of this, Mavi. It’s not doing you any good.”
“You know, my life was going just fine before you and your boss took it over. I liked my job. It wasn’t complicated. Everything had its place and I kept work and personal stuff separate. He came in and dropped it all in an unholy blender and flipped that fucker on.”
“Have you ever thought that maybe it’s what you needed?”
Snatching the bottle from his hand, I shoot him a disbelieving look. “Yeah, right, like a hole in the head. Tell me, how long have you really known Cassandra?”
Raziel’s expression turns subtly blank. “I don’t know what you mean.”
“Stop the bullshit. The room she has is well lived in and has been for some time. She’s familiar with it and doesn’t act like someone who’s just been imprisoned here. Cass also calls you Raz. You don’t give people you just met nicknames like that. It’s intimate. Friendly.”
Sighing, he rakes a hand through his unruly hair. “Six.” He says quietly. “She was six when the boss found her. Scrawny lit
tle thing. Her mother had the gift too, but chose to blot it out with drink and drugs. The bitch was barely around. Left Cass to fend for herself. She’s the most gifted Seer we’ve ever encountered. He took her under his wing and brought her here after she predicted her first prophecy. She’s been with us ever since.”
This was something I never saw coming. Another pawn in their game of deceit and secrets? Another pet? It must be a bonus having an oracle at your personal beck and call. No wonder she’s so fucked in the head.
“He raised her?” I ask, still not quite sure I can believe my ears.
Fiddling with the cork screw, Raziel nods. “We both did.”
“Then how the fuck did she end up in the transport we ambushed terrified and half starved?” Anger laces my tone. Her haunted look when we’d rescued her is something I haven’t been able to shake.
“Trukun had her kidnapped right under our noses. I’d been tracking them relentlessly for two weeks before you busted her out. They’d always been two steps ahead of me.” I catch his attention on something over my shoulder. “That bitch starved her, scared the crap out of her but was wise enough not to let her men abuse Cass.”
Lucifer is watching us broodingly from the doorway. His royal darkness is standing there looking all lethal and dangerous. “The angels fear you.”
“And because of that you want to use me for your own ends. I’m a fucked-up hybrid. A freak.” I counter, saluting him with my drink. Letting my guard down again isn’t something I can afford. I’m afraid he might crush me this time if I do.
He gives me that cocky smirk. The one that drives me wild. “Are you planning on drinking yourself into oblivion?”
Silently, Raziel briskly prises the wine from my hand before placing it back on the table.
“My brother is probably dead. Hacked up by your ex-girlfriend. So yes, I’m drowning my sorrows with as many bottles as I can find tonight.” Reaching for it again, I swallow down the contents before discarding it empty.
“He’s still breathing according to my spies. Trukun will want to cause you the most suffering before she takes his life. You could achieve such great things if you accepted your fate, my Flower.”