Maybe, Lexie thought, she and Michael could at least have that same kind of relationship built on mutual respect. She would do anything to make her husband-to-be happy in his life with her. Anything, so Michael never regretted their marriage.
When she heard his truck in the drive, she jumped out of the chair as it toppled over behind her. Lucas Tso and his wife had been standing nearby, and he righted the chair.
“A case of premarriage nerves?” he asked with a sly grin.
“No, not at all,” she lied. “I just want the ceremony to begin soon so everyone won’t have to keep waiting.”
Michael stepped outside from his parents’ kitchen door. Lexie watched while he stood, looking over the whole area. When his gaze finally landed on her, she saw his eyes turn dark and stormy. He started out in her direction with a purposeful stride.
Her whole body jerked to attention as he walked toward her. She folded her hands in front to hide the sudden shakes, because she couldn’t tell what he was thinking. Had he decided to call the wedding off? Had his brush with death reminded him that life could be too short to waste time tied to someone you didn’t love?
She swallowed hard and waited. He stopped just short of her, turning to make a comment to Teal, Lucas’s new wife, who was standing with her husband.
Lexie’s heart was pounding so loud she couldn’t even understand the words the two cousins exchanged. At last, Michael turned around to face her again.
His steamy chocolate eyes gave her no hint as to his mood. “May I speak to you for a moment?”
Uh-oh. This was it. He was going to tell her the wedding was off.
“Sure.” Her knees wobbled, but she managed to force a smile aimed toward Lucas and Teal. “Would you excuse us?”
Michael took her elbow and guided her into the house without waiting for his cousin’s answer. He stormed the two of them through the kitchen, where several old women stood at the stove preparing fry bread. Then he led her toward the relative quiet of the living room, but veered off at the last moment and rushed them toward the hallway leading to the bedrooms.
Her heart sank. It must be really terrible news if he needed such extreme privacy just to say the words. Silently, deliberately, he walked them down the long hall to a guest bedroom. Ushering her inside the bathroom, he closed and locked the door behind them.
The small space meant the two of them had to stand close together. Too close. Michael’s strong, sexy body was taking up most of the room. It was hard for her to catch her breath.
So she took a deep lung full of air and looked up at him. “Michael, you don’t need to—”
“Yes, I do,” he said in a raw voice as he pushed her back against the wall and clamped his lips on hers in a wild kiss.
Stunned, Lexie clung to him. Hearing herself making odd strangled noises, she felt embarrassed when the sounds came out somewhere between a laugh and a moan. But Michael groaned in response to them, and grazed his teeth along her bottom lip—nipping, tasting and driving her to make still higher sounding notes.
Fast. Violent. Arousing. Devouring her with kisses, he rocked against her body until she could only wrap her arms around his neck and hang on.
As he ran his hands down her sides, he brought more heat and tension curling in her chest. When his hands reached her hips, he cupped her bottom and held her tight. Tight enough to pull her off her feet as he pressed her stomach against the fierceness of his arousal.
With his breath catching and seemingly as labored as hers was, Michael pulled back just enough to gaze into her eyes. The look he gave her was heady, blazing with passion and unmistakable.
“I’ve been thinking about this for days,” he said as he inched her skirt up and ran his hands underneath. I’m sorry but I can’t…I can’t wait.”
Trying to gulp in air, Lexie was so taken with desire she could barely even think. “But the wedding…the guests.”
“They’ll wait.”
He bunched the skirt around her waist and slid her underpants down. As he palmed her, she began to squirm. He kept gazing into her eyes. His eyes seemed to be begging her to stay with him. It became the most intimate moment she’d ever had, and she nearly passed out from the heat of her own lust.
In the next second, he turned them both in one smooth move, leaning her bottom against the counter. Then he knelt down while he slipped her panties free. Naked below the waist and open to his view, she felt herself getting dizzy as he trailed his hands back up the inside of her thighs and nudged them to open wider. Before she could even catch her breath, he pressed his face to the place that was pulsating and already wet with need. Her whole body jerked a foot in the air when he finally plunged his tongue deep inside her waiting core.
She bit down on her own tongue to keep from screaming out his name. What would his family think of them if they heard her shouts? But the sensations he was creating inside her were just too intense for her to keep still. Whimpering, she squirmed and begged.
“Michael, please,” was all she could manage as she drove her fingers through his hair and hung on.
He didn’t let up. Soon she felt her whole body shivering and knew she couldn’t hold out much longer. Reaching for him, she desperately wanted them to go over together. He only batted her hands away with a chuckle.
“Wait,” she mumbled. But in the very next instant, the thickness in her blood sent her beyond waiting. The swift rush of sensation snapping around in her veins brought a riot of pleasure with it. Her head fell back with a moan.
The only thing keeping her in the moment was the knowledge he’d been as crazed with wanting her as she’d been for him. But she couldn’t seem to move. Michael stood then and wrapped her tightly in the warmth of his arms.
Still pulsating with her release, she concentrated on reaching for him. But he shook his head and held her immobile.
“You’re so beautiful,” he said and bent to nibble on her neck.
“But that…that wasn’t fair,” she muttered, still in a lusty fog.
He let her skirt fall back down around her legs. “I think it was fair. I think it was perfect. Just like you are.”
Oh, the man was too much. Her chest hurt as it filled with love. She felt drugged by the force of her need.
“I love you so much,” she blurted out without being able to stop herself. “I want to make you as happy as you make me.”
“Lexie,” he said with a touch of surprise in his voice.
“You don’t mean that.”
Still dazed and not quite thinking, she looked up into his eyes. What she saw almost doubled her over. Certainly she found desire in his expression, but something else lurked underneath all that. Something Lexie had thought she would never find in those intelligent but arrogant eyes.
Vulnerability. He was afraid. Afraid she would hurt him by saying the wrong words.
Choked with the intensity of the moment, she couldn’t say a thing. Reaching out, she touched his face, hoping he would be able to read what was in her heart. Hoping he would say what she had longed to hear.
But after a few silent seconds, he dragged his gaze from hers and looked embarrassed. By the time he faced her again, the scared expression was gone and the sexy, arrogant male look was back in its place. She’d lost the momentum. Lost the battle.
He bent to pick up her underwear. “Better get dressed. We can’t keep everyone waiting much longer.”
Where were the words that should’ve gone with the vulnerability she’d seen? All that was left to see now was a tightly clenched jaw. She’d taken a big risk by handing him her heart. And she gotten exactly what she should’ve expected in return. Great sex seemed to be the only thing they had going between them. But well, she guessed it could be worse. Good marriages had been made on a lot less.
When he tried to hand her panties over, she refused to take them. “Keep them in your pocket for me, will you? They’ll be a great reminder of what you still have to look forward to after we’re married.”
Michael groaned. “You expect me to get through the ceremony knowing you’re naked underneath that skirt?”
“Yep.” She straightened, tucked in her blouse and fluffed her hair. “That ought to keep you paying attention.”
With a smug smile and a soft, self-deprecating laugh, Lexie unlocked the door and walked out. If sex was all they had, she would make the best of it. Theirs was going to be one very interesting marriage.
He should be relieved, Michael told himself as the two of them walked outside and headed toward the marriage arbor. The sex between them was better than spectacular. Lexie had been so incredibly responsive to him. Her body was amazing with all that soft, silky skin. Their marriage would definitely stay hot and exciting for a lifetime.
As she’d cooled down from his touches, though, he’d seen that the expression on her face wasn’t quite as happy and content as he’d dreamed it would be. She’d walked out of the bathroom all full of feminine sass. But behind her eyes was a bruised look he couldn’t quite get past.
Confused, he tried to put things together. Why the obviously phony words of love? Had she only been trying to get back at him for taking her over the edge alone? If she truly loved him, Lexie would’ve said so long ago. He didn’t know her to be devious, but the battered look in her eyes worried him. If she was mad, he would have to find a way to make things right again. But he wasn’t sorry for what he’d done.
He’d been crazed with wanting her from the instant he’d spotted her, waiting outside for him to make their marriage vows. He had needed to feel alive again after seeing death and destruction up close at the Skinwalker’s. He’d known she would bring him back to life. He just hadn’t thought through the consequences.
Looking over to her now in the sunshine, he saw the way her chin lifted as they walked into the circle of his clan and friends. Traditionally, wedding ceremonies would be done at night and at the bride’s parents’ home. But their wedding would take place in daylight and in front of his family only. Except for Jack, she had no one.
Most of the ceremony would be in keeping with tradition. The temporary arbor, set up to resemble a hogan, had been constructed to signify the newlyweds starting off as an independent family with their own home and the privacy they needed.
When they approached the arbor, Lexie split off and Michael’s mother stepped to his side. The groom was traditionally supposed to take his place at the west side of the hogan with his mother sitting beside him. Michael worried about Lexie not having relatives in attendance, but was somewhat placated knowing his cousins’ wives were her attendants.
After he and his family sat down on the hogan floor, the bride appeared and his heart skipped. She was carrying a Navajo wedding basket, made especially for the occasion. It was half-filled with white corn mush, as was the custom. Walking behind her and carrying a water jug, was his cousin Ben, who would conduct the ceremony.
Everything went smoothly. Lexie sat in her place beside him on the south side. Ben, acting as medicine man, poured water over both their hands in a washing ceremony, meant to cleanse body, mind and spirit. Then he blessed the basket of mush by sprinkling corn pollen from all four directions.
It was a solemn moment for Michael, and a lump formed in his throat. He shot a glance toward his bride, wondering if she would understand the symbolism. If the meanings behind the two of them being united by the four corners of the Navajo universe were clear to her.
After the corn blessing, the wedding was supposed to continue outside. With everyone sharing the traditional meal, and with the elders advising the new couple about married life.
As his clan and friends rose to their feet, though, Michael was compelled to say something more to his new bride. Something untraditional.
He held up his hand for quiet, then turned to Lexie and took her hand. “My darling wife,” he began. “I know you may not understand the complete significance behind the ceremonial planting of the seeds of our life and love together. But be sure of one thing, my love for you is strong and true. I promise to protect you and your child as my love for you both grows deeper throughout our years together. Never doubt me, or my love.”
Lexie’s mouth dropped open and tears began filling her eyes as she silently stared up at him. Had he done something wrong? Had his surprise declaration embarrassed her somehow?
“Lexie,” he whispered. “Please don’t be upset. What did I do?”
“You love me?” she asked on a half sob. Her chin trembled.
“Of course.” Confused by the look in her eyes, it took him a full minute until it finally dawned on him what she’d meant. She hadn’t known. He’d never said the words and she hadn’t read his mind.
Totally ignoring the crowd around them, Michael dropped to one knee. “Alexis Ayze,” he began formally past the huge lump in his throat. “I love you with everything I have to give and have since the very first day I saw your beautiful face. Your acceptance of our traditions and decision to help our cause only makes me love you more every day. Whatever problems I thought we had mean nothing now. I swear we’ll have a good life. I’ll make it happen. A life filled with as much love as I can provide, no matter that you don’t feel the same way.”
She gasped and cupped his face in her hands. “But I love you, too. I already told you that, and I meant every word. Don’t you know?”
He looked in her eyes and saw what an idiot he’d been. He could see now that she’d been telling him she loved him, both with and without the words. By just her loving actions. But he’d been blinded by his male pride and hadn’t trusted his own heart.
Standing then, he took her in his arms and kissed her with as much feeling as he could put into it. When they came up for air, he held her close for another few seconds, refusing to let her go now that they finally understood each other. She snuggled against him, content and oblivious to the murmurs from their family.
He was content, too. Content and beyond happy now that he’d finally figured out how to say the words of a lifetime. The words that would finally bring them to truth and love.
Epilogue
H astiin Dodge Todacheene finished the pollen blessing, then began a chant Lexie knew was in praise of the four-sacred mountains. As he sang, she felt the power of his presence, uplifting and spellbinding.
She and Michael had been married for two whole weeks, and one of his cousins had finally located the old medicine man. But he’d agreed only to talk to her.
The two of them sat alone inside the medicine hogan behind Michael’s house, her house now, too. She hadn’t said anything at all to him yet and wished she could be outside with Michael and Jack in the morning sunshine.
After a few more minutes of chanting, the hataalii stopped and spoke to her. “You have been seeing spirits of the dead ones, daughter.”
It wasn’t a question and she’d been surprised he spoke in English. She didn’t dare open her mouth to respond.
“Do you believe you need a curing Sing?” The old man studied her in the low light inside the hogan.
Lexie wasn’t so sure she needed this “cure.” She had every intention of continuing to see ghosts, for as long as they had messages to give her. Besides, she knew now that her son had inherited the gift. She would have to help him learn to use it, too.
“Yes,” the old man said quietly as if she’d spoken the words aloud. “Your son will need your guidance. He is destined for greatness. His spirit will bring the Dine into a new age of harmony and peace.”
“My Jack?” The question had slipped out.
“Do not question destiny or falter in commitment. You have come far in your journey. But the trek has just begun. Now you have a good warrior walking beside you.”
Was this guy saying what she thought? “I don’t need a cure?” she guessed. “Not since Michael and I are married.”
“There is still evil to conquer. But the dawn is breaking. You must continue to help the Brotherhood on the true path.”
A few minutes later, Lexie emerged fro
m the hogan and sought out her husband and son in the bright morning light. She had a duty and purpose in her life, and she didn’t need a medicine man cure.
Not since she and Jack had found a whole new world in the arms of the man who loved them.
SRS 1481 Shadow Whispers (09-2007)
ISBN: 978-1-4268-0578-3
SHADOW WHISPERS
Copyright © 2007 by Linda Lucas Sankpill
To my wonderful critique group: Marcia King-Gamble, Carol Stephenson, Sandra Madden, Karen Kendall, Vicky Koch, Linda Anderson and Debbie St. Amand, who’ve supported me through good times and bad. You all have my gratitude and my love.
Chapter 1
L ike a panther, she stalked her prey through the shivery, silent night. The young Navajo woman going by the name Sunnie Begay had made herself too tough to feel the cold. Other forces made her too tough to care.
Alone but bolstered by the knowledge and expertise she had recently acquired, Sunnie crept through sagebrush and granite boulders. Too dark on this moonless night to see much, she let her memory, honed senses and imagination guide the way.
As she edged ever so surely to her date with destiny, instinct told her that at last the end was near.
Tonight she would catch the Navajo Wolf unawares. She would take her shot, ending the misery the People had for years endured at the hands of that abomination of mankind. The monster who had wreaked his last bit of suffering on Navajoland would go the way he had lived—through violence.
Hefting the rifle case that had become her only companion over the last six months, Sunnie took her spot among the rocks. On this blustery winter’s evening, the last of the cottonwood leaves rattled in the frosty midnight hours.
She carefully removed her dismantled rifle from the case and admired its shiny barrel by the light of the stars. Using her teeth, she pulled off her sheepskin gloves and caught the faint scent of gun oil. Listening to the intense quiet of the desert and the cliffs surrounding her position, Sunnie took each measured step with noiseless deliberation.
Books by Linda Conrad Page 111