by Alison Mello
I jog up my steps to find the most beautiful array of wildflowers. I instantly know they are from Remy. They remind me of our spot by the lake where we had our picnic. I pull the note from the bouquet.
Kenzie,
I saw these and they reminded me of you and our picnic together. I hope things are going well with you and Nana.
Remy
I smile, carrying them into the house in search of a vase to put them in. They’re gorgeous, and I don’t want them to die anytime soon. As soon as they’re in water, I hurry down the hall to change into a pair of capris and a more casual top. I run out the door, locking it up tight behind me.
When I pull up to Nana’s house, she’s sitting on the porch as usual. Her hair looks like it’s been freshly washed and combed, and she’s wearing a long pale blue night shirt that goes down to her shins. She loves that porch swing, but she looks tired and lonely. “How are you, Nana?”
“I’m tired, Kenzie. How are you, sweetie?”
I smile because she called me Kenzie today. “I’m okay, Nana. Are you ready to have some dinner?”
“Sure, that nice young lady Emily is inside fixing it for us.” She smiles, taking my hand as she stands from the porch swing. “Oh my knees aren’t what they used to be,” she says to me, shuffling across the porch.
“Are you in pain, Nana? We can ask Dr. Bennett if there’s something he can give you.”
“No, dear, they just feel weak.” She holds onto me.
When we get to the table, Emily is there putting two plates down with two glasses of milk. “Thank you, Emily.” I give her with a warm smile.
“You’re most welcome. If you don’t mind, now that you’re here, I’m going to head home to feed my family.”
“Not at all, you have a great night.”
She smiles back at me. “You as well.”
We both begin eating in a comfortable silence until Nana says, “What’s wrong, Kenzie? I can see from the look on your face that you’re deep in thought.”
I don’t know if she remembers the conversation we had on the porch, so I don’t know where to begin. I sigh as I contemplate what to say. “I met this guy, Nana,” I tell her, pausing to take a bite of my dinner and think about what to say next. “He’s real sweet and handsome, and he treats me well.”
“But?” she says. Nana obviously knows I’m going to say more.
I go into all the details from our earlier conversation, reminding her of my fears. A tear escapes me and I say, “I think that is my biggest fear, that I’ll love him so hard and then I’ll lose him.”
Nana smiles at me. “You do realize that, no matter who you fall in love with, you will lose him at some point. Your grandfather proudly served his country for years and didn’t pass on until long after he retired.” I nod but say nothing. “Your mother may have been lonely, and she may have spent a lot of time in fear over where your father was and what he was doing, but she was also incredibly proud of him. She wore the title of Army Wife proudly.” She pushes her plate away. “Look at me, Kenzie.” She waits for my eyes to meet hers. “You’ve witnessed a lot of loss at a young age, my love, but I think you fear losing someone you love more than falling for someone who has a military career.”
She leaves the conversation at that so I can think about what she’s said. I haven’t texted or called him since the block party, and there’s no denying I miss his smile. We definitely have fun together. I smile, thinking about how my body reacts to his every touch.
“I’ll think about it, Nana. I have a lot going on right now, trying to get back into the swing of school.”
“Don’t wait too long. You’ll miss out on a good thing.” She finishes her milk and says, “Will you help me to the living room?”
“Sure, Nana.” I help her to her feet and walk her to the living room. She’s barely holding on to me, but her confidence is gone and it breaks my heart.
“You know, I remember your mama once telling me she often missed your father, but every time he came home she got to fall in love all over again.” She sits in the seat, then looks up at me. “Don’t forget, absence makes the heart grow fonder.” She pats my hand. I stroll off to the kitchen to clean up from dinner.
The kitchen is clean, and Nana is in bed with the TV timer set and the phone by her side in case she needs anything. I lock the door and drive up the street to the bar where I’m meeting Lilly. It’s a few minutes away so it doesn’t take me long, but when I get there I struggle to find a place to park, because it’s busy. I finally find a parking spot, and on my way in, I text Lilly.
Kenzie: At the bar!
Lilly: Inside, saving you a seat.
I smile. Of course she’s already in the bar. I walk through the door, and instantly spot Lilly sitting on the corner. I squeeze my way through and take the seat next to her. The bartender comes over and says, “What can I get you?”
“Light beer please, whatever you have on tap.”
He smiles and walks off to get my beer. “Here you go,” he says when he comes back.
“On my tab,” Lilly yells to the guy over the music. “How’s class going?” she shouts.
“It’s good. I seem to have some good kids this year. They’re definitely more polite and way shyer than the city kids I have been teaching for the last few years.”
She nods. “So, what’s up with you and Remy?”
I sigh. “I don’t know. I haven’t spoken to him since the block party, but he left me flowers today.”
Her face lights up. “He did?”
I tell her about the card, and explain about the picnic and the wildflowers that were all around us.
“That’s so sweet.” She sips her beer.
“Yeah, I miss him.” I look down at my drink. “It’s hard, though. I’m so busy with school and trying to spend time with Nana.”
“How is your nana?” she asks.
“She was having a good day today. She remembered who I was, and we had a long conversation about Remy and my fears.”
“Did it help?”
“Not really, because all it did was tell me my fear comes from more than him being in the military, so now I know why I fear dating him, but it didn’t tell me how to get over being afraid.”
“Well that sucks,” she says. “Especially because he and Keaton are walking this way,” she says as I shoot her questioning look.
“Listen, I had nothing to do with this. I only told him we were having a girls’ night. I didn’t even tell him where we were going.” I sigh as a smile spreads across my face. A part of me is really happy to see him.
“Hey, sugar,” Keaton says to Lilly. “Didn’t realize this is where you were having your girls’ night.”
“No big deal.” Lilly smiles at him.
I turn to Remy. “Thanks for the flowers. I was going to call you tomorrow to thank you. I was a bit rushed after work.”
He smiles down at me. “You’re welcome. I miss you, and they made me think of you.”
“Listen, Remy…” I trail off, starting to fumble through my words.
“I told you when you were ready to talk to come see me, and I meant it.” The bartender approaches, and Keaton orders them two beers. Remy smiles down at me. “But it doesn’t mean I’m going to stop showing you that I care for you.” He can see I’m struggling to hear him over the music, so he leans in closer to my ear. His warm breath hits my skin, and sends a shiver through me. I’m sure he caught it too. “I’m still going to show you that I care for you. You’ve gotten under my skin in a short period of time. There isn’t much that happens in a day that I don’t think of you.”
I smile. “I know I haven’t come to you to talk yet, but I do miss you.”
A slow song comes on, and he says, “Dance with me.”
I look down at my beer as I contemplate what to do. I’m not sure I should. “Hey, you two aren’t jumping in our girls’ night, are you?” Lilly shouts over to us.
“I guess we’re not.” Remy slaps his brother on t
he arm. “Let’s go, man.” They both grab their beers and walk away. I watch as they take a booth at the other side of the room. They have a clear view of us and the dance floor. I’m not sure if I should be happy or sad that Lilly scared them off, and she knows I’m thinking about it as I smile over at him. Damn, he’s looking hot in his jeans and his snug, black V-neck shirt.
“Stop staring at him,” she yells at me, grabbing my arm. When I turn back to her, she says, “What did he say?”
“That he misses me and the flowers he left me made him think of me.”
“And?” she asks like there’s supposed to be more.
“I was going to try to explain, and he stopped me.” I shrug. “I guess he could tell I wasn’t quite ready to talk. Besides, this isn’t the time or the place for that conversation.”
***
Remy
My phone vibrates against my hip. I pull it from the clip, and look to see I have a text from Keaton.
Keaton: Come out with me. Lilly’s having a girls’ night and I have nothing to do.
Remy: What do you have in mind?
Keaton: Just a beer at T.N.T.
Remy: Sounds good. Pick me up.
Keaton: On my way.
I run upstairs to throw on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. I quickly spray on some cologne, wondering if he’s setting me up. He better not, because so help me lord, I’ll kick his ass, I think to myself as I get back downstairs to wait for him. I see his truck pull into the driveway. I jump up and meet him outside. “Dude, this better not be some sort of setup,” I threaten, shutting the door to his truck.
“Nah, I’m serious. I guess Kenzie had a long first week back to school, so she and Lilly are going out. She wouldn’t even tell me where they were going.”
“Fine, let’s go get some beers then. T.N.T. has a DJ on the weekend. We can chill there and get some food.”
“Has she called you?”
“Nah, I left her some flowers today with a note telling her I hope all is well with her nana, but I haven’t gotten a response.” We pull up to the local bar a few minutes later. The place is slamming. There are cars everywhere. We had to circle the block to try and find a place to park. We’re walking up the street to the bar when Keaton says, “I’m sure she’ll call you tomorrow to thank you. She doesn’t seem like the type of person to be silent after a gesture like that.”
“Maybe, but if she doesn’t talk to me soon, I may have to call it quits and just move on.”
“I can’t say I blame you.” We step into the bar, and as we thought, the place is packed. We’re both looking around trying to figure out where we’re going to sit, when I spot her.
“Dude, they’re fucking here, you asshole.”
“What? Where?”
I point across the bar, indicating where they’re sitting. I can’t help the smile that spreads across my face. Her hair is down and sits in waves around her face. She’s wearing a simple purple top, but she looks beautiful.
“Let me just go say hi to Lilly. I don’t want her to see us here and think I’m spying on her.”
“Yeah, whatever.” I roll my eyes as we walk over to them. Lilly spots us, and I can feel her eyes on me as we make our way over. I watch as she and Lilly go back and forth, no doubt having the same debate I had about this being a setup.
We approach, and Kenzie turns to me. “Thanks for the flowers. I was going to call you tomorrow to thank you. I was a bit rushed after work.”
“You’re welcome. I miss you and they made me think of you,” I tell her, trying to ease her nerves.
“Listen, Remy…” She looks down and starts picking at her fingers; one of her nervous habits.
“I told you when you were ready to talk to come see me, and I meant it.”
Keaton orders us two beers, and that’s when there’s a change in the music. I ask her to dance with me. I can see again she’s nervous as she contemplates what to do. Lilly jumps in and says something about interrupting their girls’ night. To be honest, I was so wrapped up in staring at Kenzie I barely caught what she said, but we decide to take our beers and go sit on the other side of the room to give them their space. I can feel her checking me out as I walk away, and I desperately want to turn around to give her a wink or say something, but I fight the urge and keep walking. She’s still staring when we slip into an empty booth on the other side of the room, but the place isn’t all that big, so I can still see her eyes on me.
I smile and turn my attention to my brother, who has a huge smile on his face. “Dude, that looked a bit intense.”
I shrug. “I asked her to dance, but your girl cut my chances.”
He laughs. “Sorry, man. I seriously didn’t know they were going to be here.”
“Ah, whatever. At least she thanked me for the flowers and managed to tell me she misses me.”
We’re enjoying some nachos and our beers when our girls get up to dance. That’s right. I called her mine. I’m not about to give up yet, not when I know she misses me. Now it’s time to step up my game. I smile watching her shake her ass on the dance floor with her friend. She looks amazing in her tight capri jeans and purple fitted top. It comes to a low-cut v in the front, revealing just a tad bit of cleavage, but the fact that I know what’s under that shirt has my cock twitching under the table.
The waitress blocks our view to drop us another round of beers and take away our nachos. She tells us she’ll be back to check on us, and when she walks away, I see Daniel standing next to Kenzie. I instantly stand and walk over. My girl is visibly upset, and this guy is really starting to piss me the fuck off. As I approach them, I hear her say, “I don’t want to dance with you, Daniel. I’m here with Lilly for a girls’ night, now leave us alone.”
The guy is slurring his words when he says, “Come on, Kenzie, just one little dance. Let me show you what if it feels like to have our bodies pressed together again.” He starts swaying by himself.
I tap him on the shoulder and say, “I think the lady said she’s good.”
“You need to mind your fucking business,” he says with a hiccup.
“You’re drunk and need to go home,” I warn nicely, but he doesn’t take the hint. Instead, he swings at me. I duck, causing him to totally miss me. He spins himself around, and I wrap my arms around his body, holding him in place. Kenzie runs off to get a bouncer, and when they get back, Daniel’s grunting and screaming for me to let him go. “Are you going to leave peacefully if I let you go?”
“Yes,” he screams. The bouncer is right by my side, so I let him go, but it was a big mistake. The guy shoots his elbow up behind him, nailing me right in the face. I want to go after him, but the bouncer pins his hands behind his back. Kenzie explains what happened, and the cops are called to take Daniel away on assault charges.
Lilly and Keaton come over with a bag of ice for my eye. It’ll definitely be black and blue tomorrow, but hopefully not too bad, because if it’s still there on Monday I’m going to have some explaining to do to my commander.
The four of us decide we’ve had enough for one night, so I walk Kenzie to her car while Keaton walks Lilly to hers.
“Thanks for coming to my rescue,” she says bashfully.
“It’s no big deal,” I tell her, lowering the ice from my eye. When she sees it she gasps, placing one hand on either side of my face. She gently pulls me down for a closer look before pressing her soft lips to the side of my eye.
“Keep the ice on that, and I promise I will call you soon.”
I nod at her as she climbs into her car.
“Drive carefully,” I warn before shutting her car door, and watching her drive off.
I sigh and walk back to Keaton’s truck, with the ice pressed to my eye. Fuck, it hurts. When I get there, he’s already inside waiting for me. I climb in, and he says, “Let’s get you home, Rocky.”
“Fuck you, man.”
He bursts into laughter and takes off from the lot.
Chapter 16
Kenzie
Another week of school is just about over. Today I introduced the kids to Genius Hour, and they absolutely loved it. I gave them time to do research in books as well as on the classroom laptops. They did an amazing job. We only have three laptops for the entire class, and they were great about sharing them. I feel like this is going to be a great year. I finish picking up a few things around my classroom, ensuring it’s ready for Monday morning, then I grab my bag and head for the door.
Though I haven’t actually spoken to Remy this week, he has left me a bunch of surprises. He’s been leaving things like cards, notes, flowers, and bears to let me know that he’s thinking about me and not giving up. I’ve only managed to send him text messages thanking him for the things he’s left me, and I usually get a smiley face back. I almost can’t wait to get home to see what I find today.
I climb into my car to drive home, and when I pull up, as usual, there are flowers on my porch. This guy is amazing. I decided yesterday that today was the day we were going to talk. I’m calling him tonight to see if he’s free either tonight or this weekend. I miss him, and I need to stop this fear I have and give this a real chance. I bend down to pick up the flowers to see a handwritten note with them. I quickly open it, but when I do I’m shocked into silence. This isn’t like the other notes he’s left me.
Kenzie,
I have been so torn over how to handle this situation. I’ve wanted to call you all day, but didn’t think it was appropriate since you were at work. Trust me when I tell you this is not any easier to say on paper than face-to-face. I’ve been called up for a mission, and I leave this evening. As I’m sure you realize, I cannot give you any details as to where I’m going, and unfortunately, I don’t know how long I’ll be gone. I have a feeling this particular situation was what you had been fearing this entire time. I’m sorry you have to face it now, but this is my job, and though I care a great deal about you, I also love what I do.