by Everly West
"I can't believe you ladies talked me into going on this adventure with you. Here it is almost Christmas, and it's so much better than being where we lost everything," Anna said with a smile.
Though she missed the paper and her father, there was no longer a cloud of doom hanging over. No more did she walk down the street and see block after block of destroyed buildings. "There's hope we're all going to find love."
"So what are you each getting your husbands for Christmas?" Sarah asked.
The women glanced at her.
"Christmas is next week. You're running out of time to either make or purchase something for your new husband," Charity said, gazing at them.
How did she bring up what she wanted to talk about to her girlfriends? Each one knew her situation and how her father had felt about Christmas. Now married, her husband was demanding they celebrate. And while she was excited about celebrating, she also felt nervous.
This would be her first joyful Christmas spent with the man she'd married. Part of her still believed it was wrong and yet the child in her wanted to have fun.
"Something for his favorite horse, Jack. That man loves that animal," Sarah said with a sigh. "He's my biggest competition."
The women giggled.
"Do you have any suggestions? I don't have a clue. What about you?" Anna asked Charity. "What are you going to buy Lewis?"
"A wedding ring. If I can find one I can afford. New clothes for Isaac so he doesn't look like a beggar. The boy hasn't had anything but hand-me-downs for so long."
Anna admired Charity for her giving nature. All her life, she'd tried to help others and had done a great job.
"You've really taken that child under your wing," Sarah replied, not looking up but putting in her tiny stitches.
"If we hadn't come to Angel Creek, we might all be homeless."
The women sighed and Anna wondered if the government had seized her home yet. With Papa's death, everything had changed and she knew she could no longer afford the mansion. After the Yankees ransacked the place, not much had been left.
Of course, the Confederates had come first, looking for food, ammunition, and anything of value. Then came the Union soldiers. After her father's death, she feared for her safety.
"Yes, I needed this chance at happiness," Sarah said. "Life is not perfect here, but if we stayed in Charleston, life would be much worse."
"I'm late," Charity said, glancing at her friends. "Don't know if it means anything, but I'm about two weeks late."
Anna stared at her friend, her heart seizing with anxiety. While she was happy for her, what if the marriage didn't work? What if she had a baby and then her husband deserted her? Without a doubt, she knew that Levi would be so happy if they were expecting a baby.
"Our thirty days are not up," Anna said surprised, but not willing to admit they had not waited either. "Have you?"
"Yes," Charity said with a giggle. "We didn't wait."
"But, Charity, you can't back out now. You're committed to being married to Lewis for the rest of your life. Is that what you want?" Anna asked, wondering the same about herself and Levi. "Even though he owns a saloon?" Anna asked shocked.
"Funny thing, I love working beside him in the bar. So many lonesome men who just come in to drink and be around people. What this town needs is a matchmaker. Someone to find ladies for these lonely hearts."
Anna smiled at the idea of Charity becoming the town matchmaker. It seemed so fitting given that she was the one who found the ad in the Groom’s Gazette.
Sarah tilted her head and smiled at her. "That would be appropriate for you. Maybe if the saloon doesn't work out, you should think about setting up a shop and finding women for the men in town."
"Lewis runs a clean establishment, and working beside him, I've learned so much about life and men and how they think. Most of them are just big ole teddy bears."
From the sound of her friend, she knew she was happy and Anna felt glad for her.
A laugh bubbled up from Charity’s chest. "There are some that are stubborn and bull-headed who had to experience being tossed out in the street. My husband makes it clear, I belong to him and no one touches or treats his wife badly without suffering the consequences.
"I love my husband very much, but I'm waiting to tell him. By Christmas I may know if I'm expecting. This year is going to be the best holiday ever."
They were all falling in love with their new husbands. Their lives had changed for the better, but still Anna had reservations.
"Charity, I'm thrilled for you," Sarah said.
"The first one of us to expect a baby. After Charleston, I'm so happy for you," Anna said. "In fact, I wish it were me."
And she did. The thought of having a child was scary, but she wanted a family with Levi. She wanted to fall in love with her husband and put the past behind her. There was no returning to Charleston - it was over. It would be best if she put this all behind her and concentrated on her husband. Even learned to enjoy Christmas.
After Charity left, Anna turned to Sarah. "You know how much I hate Christmas. Levi celebrates the holiday. In fact, he told me in our home we would celebrate my birthday and Christmas, even while honoring my mother."
Sarah hugged her friend. "I've been telling you for years that Christmas was a time of happiness, not mourning. I’m so happy for you. Are you excited?"
Fear was more what Anna was feeling. For so many years, she'd hated this time of year. Knowing that while other people were spending time with family, it was just the two of them, alone with her father mourning.
Once, she tried to make it different and he chastised her for not honoring her mother's memory. Now she felt anxious. Would she be disrespecting the woman she never met?
"I'm scared. What if I feel guilty? What if I start crying? Almost twenty years of hating this time of year, now has to be changed to one of happiness. What if I can't change? What if I still hate Christmas after the celebration?"
Her friend reached out and patted her on the arm. "Take it slow and just enjoy the time with your new husband. Let him be your guide. If you start feeling sad, tell him why. Keep your heart open and enjoy the season."
It all sounded simple. Put the past behind her and move forward. She should learn to embrace her new life. Enjoy the holidays, celebrate her birthday and forget she had lost her family business and home.
But more than anything, let herself fall in love with her husband, who cared for her. The time had come for her to move forward and yet taking that first step, seemed so difficult.
"Thanks, Sarah, I had to tell someone and Charity had so much news to tell us, that I decided to wait and just tell you. Thank you for being my friend.
"And I'm not going to look at you in church on Christmas Eve, because I fear I'll start crying. This is going to be the happiest Christmas ever."
Chapter 9
Levi walked into the house and called out, "Anna?"
There was silence and Bacon who stood next to him whined. Thinking she'd gone into the barn, he hurried outside and when he stepped into the barn, that was when he noticed the horse and the sleigh were gone.
Looking outside, he noticed the tracks leading through the fresh snow up the drive. A curse burst from his lips as fear spiraled through him at the danger. With so little experience, she'd taken a huge risk driving the sleigh.
The crazy fool woman had probably gone to town. Yesterday, he noticed how anything about Christmas seemed to send her deep within herself, like she didn't know how to respond to children being happy during the holidays. Then on the way home, she'd told him why she hated the holidays so much.
The thought of her father never letting his daughter experience the joy of the holiday season was worse than crazy. While he could understand the man grieving for his wife, what about his young daughter? Wouldn't her mother want her to know the love and joy of celebrating the Savior’s birth?
How did you undo almost twenty years of sadness on that day? Even in death, the ne
ed to continue to live and be happy was what those who went before would want, or at least, Levi knew his parents would never want him to not be happy. Yes, he thought of them on the day they died, but life went on. And it was so much better not to dwell on the morbid.
Calling his horse over, he stepped up into the saddle. "Stay here, Bacon. I've got to go bring her home."
He only hoped it didn't start to snow while they were in town. Or that he didn't find the sleigh turned over somewhere between here and town. An anxiousness gripped his stomach. Anna was a novice when it came to driving and the thought of her getting hurt had him gigging his horse.
"Let's go," he said, urging the horse on.
After Anna left Sarah's house she walked to the mercantile. Christmas would be here next week, and she had nothing for Levi. What did one purchase for a man? For someone you cared about? Sure, she had bought presents for her friends, but her father told her not to spend money on him, that he didn't need anything. After a while, she had stopped purchasing him gifts and instead bought him his favorite cigar.
As she walked around the tiny store, she saw a knife that she thought Levi might like. Looking in her purse, she pulled out the little money she had left from her trip from Charleston.
"How much is the knife?"
The woman behind the counter told her and she had just enough.
"Would you like a leather holder for the knife?"
"Yes, and could you put his initials on the leather?"
"Who is your husband?"
She smiled as she thought of the man she was falling in love with. "Levi Jackson."
"Oh my, you must be Anna Tuttle," the woman said.
Anna stared at her in surprise. Why would this woman know her name?
"Yes," she said, gazing at her in shock.
The woman reached beneath the counter and handed her a letter. "This came for you."
Anna turned the letter over in her hand and gazed at the emblem on the envelope. The United States government. What could they want? More bad news? Had they confiscated the house? They already had the business and why did she care? She was a thousand miles away and there was nothing she could do. She stuffed the envelope into her reticule and turned back to the woman.
"When will the leather holder for the knife be ready?"
"We should have it ready before Christmas. Are you enjoying Angel Creek?" the woman asked.
Gazing around the store, Anna remembered the shopping in Charleston. Before the war, this would have been nothing compared to the stores and shops in her hometown. Now, most of them were closed. Most were just a pile of rubble.
"Actually, I don't know. This is my first excursion into town. Before I was stuck out at the ranch, snowed in. Do you have any books?" she asked.
“Of course, over here," the woman said.
"How about paper and a pen?"
Lately, she'd been thinking about how to keep herself occupied. The girls were all in town and she knew nothing about cooking and sewing or anything domestic. After all, the servants handled everything. Though they were no more, and Levi certainly didn't have any help with the housework. Soon she would be doing all the cooking and cleaning.
"Right here," the woman said, showing her a shelf with everything she needed.
In fewer than five minutes, she paid for her purchases and then walked out the door. As she came out into the glaring sunlight, ready to head back to the ranch, she saw her husband leaning up against the sleigh, staring at her, his eyes flashing with anger.
Her chest tightened and she felt a surge of anger, though she knew she was being irrational.
"The agreement was you wouldn't go to town by yourself. And yet you did."
"I wanted to go to town."
Walking over, she leaned up against him and gazed into his gorgeous green eyes that sparkled with anger.
"Get in the sleigh. We're going home."
"I wanted to speak with my friends...about you."
Levi's boots crunched on the frozen snow as he tied his horse to the sleigh, then crawled up into the vehicle and sank onto the seat beside his wife. His hands were shaking as he picked up the reins and clicked to the horse. With a jerk, the sleigh moved through the snow.
"I know you're mad, but I wanted to talk to my friends."
"At the risk of your life? You've only driven the sleigh one time. What if the weather changed suddenly? How would you have gotten to town or even gotten home in the blinding snow?"
He watched as she bit her lip before he turned back to getting them home. He knew he cared for Anna and longed to make their lives work together. He wanted her to be happy and yet he couldn't seem to reach her.
"I'm sorry. I knew you were busy and I thought I could do this. And I did. This is the first thing I've done on my own at the ranch and I needed to know I could harness the horse to the sleigh and get here on my own. My life has completely changed. I've gone from a pampered woman where I wrote articles for our family business to someone who needs to be taught every little thing."
Tears froze on her eyelids. "I'm sorry you got the worst bride of the bunch. At least the other girls were stronger than me. If you want to end the marriage, I'll understand."
His chest ached with the thought of breaking up. Why would she think that? Why?
"What are you talking about? Don't you think I knew when I sent for a girl from Charleston that I was probably getting some southern belle who wouldn't know the first thing about ranching?" He cursed beneath his breath. "You're more than I expected. This hating Christmas thing is a little strange, but it's not anything we can't overcome. Today, you made me angry because I feared something would happen to you."
She glanced at him, her eyes growing large as she gazed at him with a look that melted his heart.
A smile crossed her face. "You don't want to get rid of me?"
"Of course not," he said, wanting to curse at the very suggestion.
"Next time, we'll make plans to go together," she said with a smile.
"While you visit with your friends, I'll take care of errands."
"Okay," she said. Her eyes grew large. "I forgot."
Reaching down, she found her reticule and started going through her bag. She pulled out a letter and he could see the official seal. A letter from the U.S. government. What could that mean?
Ripping open the envelope, she read the letter to herself. Suddenly, she squealed loud enough, he feared the horse would spook.
She began to read, "Commander James has taken over Charleston and all businesses will be returned to their rightful owners. As long as there is no false propaganda printed, your newspaper will be returned to you at your earliest convenience."
Levi felt his heart seize in his chest. This would give her the necessary funds to support herself. She could return to the city she loved and once again run the newspaper her family owned. All the reasons she'd left Charleston, except for the murder of her father, were no longer standing in her way.
His throat clogged with emotion at the thought of her leaving and him never seeing her again.
Just when he thought they had things working between the two of them, this letter arrived and tore them apart again. While he loved her, he refused to stop her if she decided to leave. Anna had to make the decision on whether to stay with him or return to her old life. He couldn't make that for her.
Out of the corner of his eye, he could see her biting her lip as she stared at the words, rereading them. But he could give her more information to help her reach that decision.
"It will be impossible to get down the Missouri River until the spring thaw is complete. You're looking at May."
Placing her hands over her face, she nodded and he heard her sniffle.
"It's so tempting to go home, fire up the newspaper, and blast those Yankee generals for what they did to our beloved city. But that journey..."
Trees blew snow from their tops, giving a sparkly dusting appearance as they hurried on. The sun sank lower in the sky, the
rays bouncing off the glistening snow, creating prisms of rainbow colors.
"The thought of home sounds so wonderful. The people I know, our servants, my parents’ graves, the newspaper." She turned and glanced at him. "But then there's you, my husband. Come, go with me."
"No, the ranch is here, and I want nothing to do with the South or North. The decision is yours."
Levi clenched the reins tighter, knowing the woman he'd fallen in love with would soon leave and return to her beloved Charleston. And then what would he do?
The cold seemed to engulf him, chilling him to the bone, though the animal pelt was tucked firmly around the two of them. He feared he would soon lose his wife.
Chapter 10
All night, Levi tossed and turned, unable to sleep. All his reasons for ordering a mail-order bride, the loneliness, the desire for a family of his own, someone to share his life with, everything, kept going around and around in his head.
Finally, unable to take anymore and knowing all the work that needed to be done, he rose from the bed. Glancing back at Anna, he loved the way her blonde hair spilled over the quilt as she slept curled on her side. His heart ached as he gazed at his wife and wondered what he would do when she left.
Pulling on his pants, he hurried out the door of the bedroom and closed it quietly behind him. With Bacon at his side, they walked out to the barn just as the sun was cresting the eastern sky. "Come on, boy, we have cows to feed before the next snowstorm hits.”
Riding out of the barn, he glanced at the house and knew all he wanted to do was return, wake his beautiful wife with kisses, and beg her not to go. But how could he keep her from leaving to rescue the paper that her family had owned for two generations?
The sun rose above the horizon, spilling across the land, making sparkles on the snow as he rode to the hay sheds he recently built and spread the hay for the cattle. The animals gathered around him mooing excitedly and yet they didn't push or bump him as he put out fresh hay.