by Amy Rachiele
The door opening jolts us. Dino comes out and his eyes narrow at me when he sees us. What the fuck dude? Go away! Go to college already!
“Megan, do you want something to eat? Alessandra just put out some pasta.” The douche talks directly to her.
“No, thank you,” she says in a low voice. She clears her throat. “I’m all set.” I don’t move away from her. Her breathing is raspy. Hopefully, asshole gets the hint to leave us alone. I don’t give a shit that Dino’s still standing here.
He finally shakes his head and goes back into the house. I whisper in her ear again. “I’ve wanted to be this close to you for a long time.” I continue to brush my lips across her cheek and down her scrumptious neck. I hear a faint moan in the back of her throat. My fuckin’ heart is pumping like the engine of a train. I better quit smoking or she’s going to give me a heart attack. I search her eyes.
“Do you want to get out of here?” I feel her freeze beneath my gaze. “I promise it’ll be okay.” My voice is still low. She doesn’t answer right away.
“I came here with Raven.” She pauses, thinking. “I need to tell her.”
“Let’s go find her.” I lightly take her hand and lead her back into the house. She is uncertain at first.
The poker game has broken up but the music is still on. The house seems to have cooled down. People are mellowing out now. When we get to the living room, a few people are dancing; everyone else is coupled off into their own world. I find Vito making out with Maria on the floor. I kick his outstretched leg.
“Hey, Vito, have you seen Raven?” He breaks away from Maria, and she looks at me. Maria is staring at my hand holding Megan’s. Jealous sparks ignite in her eyes.
“Yeah,” he says, pointing to a dark corner. “Over there.”
Megan and I walk over. She is making out with Louie. I look at Megan her and face is flushed. So I do the honors. I tap Louie. He pulls away from a very glowing Raven.
“Raven, I’m going to take Megan home.”
She just nods her head. I take that as she understands. I get my keys out of my pocket and lead Megan to my car.
Chapter 10
Paesan (pie-zan): friend
Megan:
Antonio is holding my hand as we walk to his Camaro. I’m still reeling from his whispers. I have circling butterflies in my stomach. I am not sure if they’re because I’m excited or terrified. My feet stop and I hesitate. I think about what my father said. Antonio notices my apprehension.
“Hey, don’t worry.” He leans towards me again with his smoldering brown eyes. “It’ll be okay. Trust me.” And for some incomprehensible reason I do, even after everyone has told me not too.
He opens the car door for me, and I slide in. The car still smells new. The black leather seats are shiny. It’s an awesome car. Well, every car is awesome to me because I don’t have one. Antonio slips in and starts the engine. He’s grinning from ear to ear and he asks me, “You alright?”
“Yes, thank you,” I say shyly. He looks unbelievable. I’ve never seen him smile so wholly before.
“I want to show you something.”
“Okay.”
Antonio drives out of town. I am thankful in case someone sees us. We are silent for a long time. I stare out the window because he keeps glancing at me while he’s driving and it’s making me uncomfortable and exposed.
“You want to listen to some music?” Antonio flips on the radio to a Top 40 station. His hand moves to my lap. He takes my hand into his and places our intertwined hands on the armrest. My nervousness spikes. He looks at me as if to say, ‘Is this Okay?’ It is, and I don’t move my hand an inch. Antonio’s hand is huge and dark. He must have observed the same thing because he says,
“Wow, your hand is tiny.” I blush. I am so nervous. I feel like I’m being naughty. I am going against my father’s wishes, and that part of me feels disobedient. But my rebellion is warranted. Antonio makes me feel like I never have before. He’s beautiful, amazing, strong, and powerful. He can command a room just by being in it.
I bet it is rare that someone sees him this way, caring and controlled.
He pulls into a park-like area I have never been before. It overlooks the river. The lights from a nearby bridge reflect off the water. He parks the car and we get out. Antonio takes my hand as we walk towards the river. The rippling noise of the water is serene.
We go and stand in front of the wrought iron railing. It’s a stunning sight. Antonio arms corral me in front of him with his hands on the railing, “Megan,” he whispers into my neck. He rubs his nose into my hair. Antonio feels so good. Standing here with him is strange. “I want to… take you somewhere.” Really! My eyes snap open. I wasn’t expecting that. He doesn’t let me answer. “I know you’re afraid of me… but I want to show you that you don’t have to be.” He spins me around to face him. “I’ll take you anywhere you want to go.” He sounds unsure and hesitant when he says, “I’d like to spend some time with you.”
Antonio Delisi, Jr. wants to spend time with me! I am so embarrassed at his words. But joy spears me. His brown eyes search mine. He seems uncertain, yet wanting all in the same gaze. My heart sinks when I remember my father’s warning. He’d be livid if he knew I was here alone with him. My phone buzzes with a text, I shift away a little from Antonio, but he still holds on to my waist. His fingertips send shivers up my spine. It’s Raven:
U OK
Megan: Yes
Raven: U still with him?
Megan: Yes
“Is that your friend?” Antonio asks tightly.
“It’s Raven, checking on me.” I’m still looking at my phone screen, when Antonio says in a low, seductive voice, “Tell her I’m gonna kiss you.”
I don’t even have a chance to react, as he crushes his lips to mine, and passion explodes between us. My phone clatters to the ground. My arms wrap around him. His muscled back is heaven under my fingers. He grips me tighter lifting me up closer to him. The ache that fills me creates a fog over my brain. Rockets of want pierce me. Antonio’s kisses radiate a kind of cherished that is foreign to me. I’m not sure how long we stand there in each other’s arms, acting on an emotion that has been bottled up for a decade.
On Sunday morning it feels like I dreamt everything that happened the night before. Antonio was mystifying. I had always been so scared of him that it felt weird. Those emotions melted away when I saw him on the deck alone in the moonlight. His desire was palpable. And when he leaned down to whisper in my ear like he had at church a week ago, it was my undoing.
I was always attracted to him, just like the rest of the females at my school. People move out of the way for him as if he is a ruler of a kingdom. He can be with any girl he wants, yet I’ve never seen him with anyone other than Alessandra. And it appears that, after last night, he wants me.
When I left him last night, I felt bereft; I wanted to stay with him. I decided to have Raven pick me up and take me home. I didn’t want my parents to see or hear Antonio’s Camaro outside the house. I offered to give him my number, but he said he already had it. About five minutes after I got into bed, my phone buzzed with a text from him asking if I got home safely. Warmth spread through my body just thinking about my time with Antonio.
Chapter 11
Andiamo (on-dee-ahmo): Let’s go
“Megan!” my mom yells. “It’s time to get ready for church.”
Oh yeah. I have to play the harp in front of the entire congregation. Why did I agree to this? My hands start sweating immediately. I shower and dress in long black palazzo pants, the ones that look like a dress but are really pants, and a pink chiffon shirt. I hear my dad moving the harp out the door as I come into the kitchen. Mom is holding the door for him. It’s a good thing my dad is really strong. The harp is heavy.
“It is a real honor that Father Giovanni asked you to play,” my mother says to me like I don’t know this.
“Yes, it is.”
“You need to do your best for him and
the Lord.”
“Yes, Mom.”
“I think you should wear your hair up, it looks more respectful than hanging down. You look almost wild. Can’t you do something about that?”
“Yes, Mom.” I pass Erin on the stairs.
“Where’re you going? I thought we were leaving,” Erin asks.
“Yeah, well, I have to fix my hair,” I say aggravated. I twist it up in a clip and rush back to the kitchen.
“Ahhh, much better,” my mother says. “Softer. Very nice.”
Wow! Praise from my mother.
In front of the church, people are on the steps mingling. My father opens the back of our mini-van to get out the Harp. I am just opening my door when I see two people stroll over towards us. The morning sun blinds me.
“Can we help you with that, Sir?” One of them asks. I step out on to the curb and it’s Antonio and Vito. Holy Crap!
“That would be great boys, thank you,” my dad says very civilly. Antonio smiles at me in his charcoal gray suit that looks lip-smacking on him. My face heats when I think of him kissing me last night. The deliciously tight clenches my stomach made with him so close. Ugh, it was sooo good. My father starts to give them instructions on how to move and carry the harp. My hands shake as I follow Antonio, Vito, and my father up the big steps to the church entrance.
*****
Antonio:
So this is her harp. It’s awesome. Vito and I very carefully carry it to the altar. Mr. O’Neill helps us to stand it up just right. Megan and her family sit in one of the first rows. I smile at her as I pass by to go sit farther back with my friends. She looks stunning in pink. My parents are sitting with the Ferretti’s on the other side of the church.
Vito and I make the sign of the cross and slip in the pew to sit with Louie and Ronnie.
“So how was last night?” I ask Louie. He looks at me funny. As if to say, ‘what the hell are you talking about?’ “Uh, Raven.” I say.
“Oh, yeah. She’s cool.” He starts to say more, but Dino Prazzo slides into the pew right behind us with Maria and some of her other cousins. I hear Dino talking to Glenn Prazzo, a junior at our school.
“Hi Tony,” Maria says in my ear as she leans in to me from behind.
“Hi, Maria,” I don’t turn around when I say it. I look at Vito out of the corner of my eye, and he’s rolling his.
Maria doesn’t get a chance to say anything more because we all rise as the organ begins to play. Dino and Glenn are still whispering. I want to turn around and tell them to shut the hell up when Father Giovanni calls Megan to the altar.
“We have a very special treat during today’s Mass. Miss Megan O’Neill is going to play Ave Maria on the harp for us.”
Megan gracefully walks to the altar, makes the sign of the cross, and gently slides behind the harp. Dino comments viciously saying,
“Wow, I‘d like to be that harp, sitting between her legs… I’d rather put my face between her…” I am moving before I even distinguish my fist colliding with Dino’s face. There is an audible GASP! from the church-goers and I hear my mother yell,
“Antonio!”
Vito grabs my arm to stop me from winding my arm back again to smash Dino’s face a second time. Ronnie is blocking me from jumping over the bench. I am lethal. Dino’s cousins are shocked. Maria is yelling something to me. Dino’s lying on the bench. Ronnie and Vito push me out of the pew. I hear Louie trailing behind stopping Maria from following. There’s loud talking and commotion in the recesses of my hearing. Dad is standing at the end of the aisle looking really pissed. Vito and Ronnie haul me outside.
I take a deep breath. The air feels good. The sun is bright and making me narrow my eyes to slits.
“What the hell is wrong with you?” my father booms from behind us.
The guys let me go and we stand way off to the side of the church.
“I’m talking to you!” my father yells.
“Dino’s a fucking prick!” I say back not looking at him. He whacks me on the head.
“Watch your mouth, we’re at church!” My father yells at me. “So…”
“I didn’t like what he said,” I murmur.
“You just punched someone in church! Your mother’s going to be saying the Hail, Mary for a week! Why did you punch him?...” I say nothing. “Answer me!” My father’s face is red from yelling.
I glance at Vito. Ronnie and Louie are standing back like they’re either body guards or they’re ready to stop me from pummeling others that are here to pray. We hear the organ playing again and some commotion at the door. Dino’s cousins are walking him out. My anger flares. I jolt ready to pound him again. Louie and Ronnie make a wall to stop me.
“Whoa!” Ronnie says. I halt, but watch Dino go to the car. Maria looks over, shakes her head, and follows her cousins. My adrenaline is still spiking.
“Take him over there.” My father points to a granite bench. The guys walk me over, and I sit down. They are all hovering. My dad sits down beside me. He’s calmer.
“Tonio, I need you to tell me what’s wrong. I can’t fix something if I don’t know what it is.”
“There’s nothing to fix, Pop.” I stare straight ahead.
“Then what is it?”
“You aren’t going to like what I say.”
“Tell me,” he says. The guys move away, far away. At first I think it’s to give us some privacy. Then I think it’s what I am going to tell him.
“Dino said something… disrespectful about Megan.” I still stare straight ahead.
“Megan. Megan O’Neill?” he asks. I nod still not looking at him. He pauses. Then he realizes what I am saying.
“Fanabola! Tonio. You can have any girl you want!” He scrubs his face with his hands. “Shit!”
“Pop, we’re at church.” I say sarcastically chastising his language.
My mother comes out of the church stomping towards us in her high heels. “Antonio Rinaldo Delisi, Jr.! What has gotten in to you!? You embarrassed me. How dare you? In God’s house!” She makes the sign of the cross and looks heavenward. “You are going to go in there and apologize to Father Giovanni!”
“Ma, ummm.” I don’t know what to say. I know it was wrong, but I just reacted. I didn’t think. I don’t regret it, but I could have waited till church was over to pound his face in. I’m ashamed of where it happened, but not of what.
“He’s interested in Megan,” my father says slowly.
“What? What are you talking about Antonio?” she asks my father. She’s still pissed. I am ready for the blow to the back of my head that I know is coming from my Mom.
“You wanted him to be interested in a girl. He is… with Megan.” She blinks a couple of times. My mother’s reaction startles me. She’s not mad like my dad. She’s happy. She’s really happy, in fact, she’s beaming at me.
“Oh! Tonio!” She claps her hands and bends down to hug me-her Coach© bag trailing on the ground. “Thank God!” She makes the sign of the cross again. “Finally!” With her hands waving, she is talking a mile a minute. “She’s smart too. She got in early to Notre Dame. And talented, you should’ve heard her play that harp….”
“Yeah, I should’ve.” I say feeling my shame at the spectacle I made in church. My phone buzzes with a text from Megan…
U OK
My mother’s eyes go immediately to my phone. “Is that her?” she squeals. My mother is giddy like a school girl. “How cute! She wants to know if you’re okay.” I turn to my father. He hangs his head.
“How long has this been going on?” he asks.
“It hasn’t. We saw each other at Alessandra’s last night. I’ve liked her for a while, Pop. I just didn’t say anything.”
“Alright…” he pauses for a long time then says, “I’ll talk to her father.”
My mother uncharacteristically jumps up and down in her heels. I hope she doesn’t twist her ankle. I stand, and she hugs me tightly, the fact that I have knocked someone out in church forgotten.
*****
Megan:
I was lucky to get through Ave Maria without throwing up. I couldn’t get the image of Antonio hitting Dino in church. It came out of nowhere. I had just settled behind the harp when the room exploded.
Through the entire Mass, I saw a replay in my mind of Antonio spinning around and punching and Dino’s head snapping back. I wouldn’t be surprised if Dino had whiplash. From the backseat of the mini-van, I could hear my mother talking to my father.
“That kid is no good. He’s got the devil in him!” she says still fuming. “If he was my boy, I would take him over my knee, then smack a for sale sign on his fancy car.” She went on and on. I thought I was going to start crying now that the shock was starting to wear off. “You see now why your Father told you to stay away from him?” Pointedly, she’s looking at me as she swivels in her seat to face me. When my mother gets going on something, there’s no telling when she’ll stop. My father says nothing.
My phone buzzes with a text from Antonio:
I’m sorry! Can I C U later?
I quickly text back:
Not sure yet
Sweet elation pumps through my veins at just the idea of seeing Antonio. He was gorgeous in his Sunday suit this morning. The searing kisses from last night mingle with the visions of his fist flying. I know I should be afraid, but I’m not. I want him. I don’t think in my entire life I have wanted anyone. One day I’m running from him; the next day all I want to do is run to him.
My father’s cell phone rings while my mother is still going on and on about the horror show at church today. My father’s words are short and one word at a time.