by Amy Rachiele
“No... It’s okay.” Erin says meekly.
“I’m Jake.” He holds his hand out to shake with her. Oh, one of the arm wrestler guys.
“Erin,” her voice is so soft, almost a whisper.
I feel him before I see him. Antonio is hovering over Jake, staring down at him intimidatingly. I know that look well now. Troy appears too.
“This is Jake.” Troy declares. “He lives in my dorm.” Antonio seems to accept this and sits down behind me. His warmth is cozy and soothing. “Well, Vito is making an impression.”
“Yeah, college life seems to agree with him,” I deadpan.
Vito is waiting for his next victim. He is dancing in place, hooting and shouting. Girls try to stand on their tiptoes to kiss him and hang on him. They are giggling and laughing like he’s a celebrity. He doesn’t even acknowledge them, except the really forceful ones, he pushes them aside gently.
“Too bad the actual studying part doesn’t agree with him,” Antonio says into my ear making me shiver.
Someone replaced Jake at the arm wrestling table. More and more guys are getting in line to try and beat Vito. The Gauntlet is just firing up. Vito takes down three more challengers. The crowd around him thickens and grows. We can barely see him now.
Antonio whispers, “I hope someone can beat him soon.” He nuzzles my neck, moving my hair aside. “I want to take you back to the suite to finish what we started.” His words sizzle under my skin. I lean back ever farther into him enjoying his soft caresses.
I am so caught up in Antonio that I don’t notice that Troy has gone back to Vito, and Erin and Jake are having a quiet conversation.
“How long are you here for?” Jake asks.
“I don’t know,” Erin replies.
“What do you think so far? Is college life all you dreamed of?” Jake chuckles softly.
Erin, playing with blades of grass, shrugs her shoulders. Then she drops the grass and rubs her arms like she’s cold.
I’m about to say something when Jake takes off his coat. He gets up on his knees and places his jacket on the front of her. It’s backwards covering her chest and arms. Antonio immediately hardens at Jake’s movements, but doesn’t say anything.
“Maybe we should wait in the car,” Antonio says. “Or go inside.”
“Sure,” I say. “I’m getting thirsty.” Antonio unwraps himself from around me and helps me up. He reaches for Erin to help her too, but Jake is already doing that. Hmmmm... Jake takes his coat off Erin and places it on her shoulders.
Cheers erupt as Vito wins another round. The four of us head into the dorm. It is crowded. We push through, but everyone is close — too close — invading my personal bubble space. I reach for Erin’s hand behind me.
The hand I reach for is already occupied. Jake has her hand and is maneuvering Erin through the mass of partiers. He is with us, tagging along. Unexpected, but whatever. He seems like a nice guy. We are forced into a single file line, Antonio is leading the way. Plastic cups and beer bottles litter the floor as we enter. The couches in the lounge area are filled with bodies. The music is much louder in here.
Words that sound on the cusp of a roar echo behind us over the music, “Who the fuck is this?!”
Antonio swings around shoving me behind him in a defensive move. It’s Vito. Dirt and grass cover his chest that glistens with sweat and alcohol. The crowds of people disperse, and we are all alone in the spacious room, like an island all our own. People are staring at us. Troy comes up behind Vito.
“That’s Jake. He’s my friend. He lives in my dorm.” Troy slaps Vito on the back congenially. “Come on, some guys from the football team showed up. They want a shot too.”
But Vito doesn’t move. His eyes are glued to Jake and Erin. His expression is savage and vicious. Antonio moves first. Erin, Jake, and I are rooted to the spot we froze in.
Jake anxiously glances between Erin and me, his hand fastened around Erin’s. The music continues to thump and pump so loudly that I can feel it through the floor. Vito still faces us, but his eyes have shifted to Antonio. Antonio is saying something to him I can’t hear.
Vito turns to leave. Antonio comes back sighing. “Don’t touch her dude,” he says to Jake authoritatively.
Jake reluctantly drops Erin’s hand. Erin runs out of the dorm, Jake’s coat dropping to the floor.
“Whoa, Erin!” I yell, and chase after her.
She takes off fast. Antonio passes me, and then yanks me along with him running in the direction she went. Prickles of panic build because I can’t see her.
Antonio curses under his breath, “What the fuck? How fast can a fourteen-year-old girl run?”
Erin runs and we chase. Even Jake is with us. The darkness envelops her. I hear sniffling, and we find Erin crouched behind a car on the street.
I lean down and squat next to her.
I’ve had enough, Meg,” Erin sobs. “I hate this.”
“I don’t know what to say Erin,” I say, frustrated, and wanting to wave a magic wand to change it all.
“I do,” Antonio says with stern confidence, “Don’t ever fuckin’ run from me again! You’re my responsibility.”
Erin flinches and Antonio softens, “Fanabola... I know you’ve been through a lot but you’re gonna have to toughen up that skin of yours.”
Troy comes over, “What’s going on?” he asks.
“Go away Troy! I don’t want to see you!” Erin screams.
“Hey, don’t take this out on Troy.” I tell her.
Jake moves forward and stands, listening and observing this exchange. Then he says, “I’ll hang out with her for a while ‘til everybody cools off.” His voice is sympathetic. Erin and I are still crouched on the ground; she’s sobbing.
“I don’t fuckin’ know you,” Antonio spits. “Vito’s right, you shouldn’t have been touching her!”
“What?!” Jake ricochets back. “I was just being nice, keeping everyone together! I wasn’t making a move!”
I know from the short time we’ve been together that Antonio is about ready to go after Jake. He’s getting angry. I move to hug Antonio from behind. I feel the hard, rough outline of a gun in the waist of his jeans.
“Hey, Jake’s a nice guy!” Troy pipes in.
This is turning a mole hill into Mount Everest.
“Why don’t we go wait in the car for Vito?” I suggest.
Tension leaves Antonio a little, a very little. I am learning quickly his triggers and responses. I reach down and help up my humiliated sister.
“Come on, Jake,” Troy says quietly. “Let’s go see how Vito is doing.”
Antonio pulls out his cigarettes and lights up as Troy and Jake walk away.
“I can’t believe you did that to me!” Erin yells when Troy and Jake are out of earshot. “You and Vito can go to hell!” Erin storms away towards the car, the darkness swallowing her up again.
I look to Antonio who’s taking a drag off his cigarette. He shrugs his shoulders and blows out smoke. “Well, at least it’s better than being curled up in a fuckin’ ball,” he comments. I shake my head, and we follow Erin.
Antonio and I get in the front and Erin sits in the back. We settle in, and Antonio turns around.
“I know you’re naïve but a guy doesn’t take a girl’s hand like that who barely fuckin’ knows her unless he’s interested... He’s not just nice.”
“Well, maybe I was interested. Did you ever think of that?” Erin is seething.
“Nope. Not gonna happen,” Antonio says matter-of-factly, laying down the law. “That chooch is too fuckin’ old for you.”
“What?!” Erin screeches. “Who died and made you boss?”
“Nobody yet,” Antonio says playfully. “But I’m still in charge.”
We sit in silence for a minute or two when the side door opens. Vito is standing there holding his coat, shirt, and shoes. Most people would probably look exhausted after taking on some many people, but Vito is glowing. I bet he could do this all n
ight.
“Troy said you guys went to the car,” he says. “Hey, what’s up with you?” he says to Erin, and taps her on the knee.
“Are you kidding?” she yells, then directs her anger back to Antonio. “How come Vito can touch me?” her voice escalates. “And...sleep in my bed?!”
Antonio responds calmly as he backs the Porsche out of the spot, “Because he’s like a big brother, not a pedophile.”
“Pedophile! What am I three?!” she yells again.
It is clear that Erin is going through some phases. They must be related to what has happened. First she was unresponsive, now she’s getting overtly angry. She definitely has a lot to overcome.
Chapter 7
Sfatcheem (s-fa-cheam): a pain in the ass!
Megan:
We made it back to the suite with less yelling. Vito was quiet. We all disperse when we got back. Erin went to her room and slammed the door. Vito mumbled he was showering and going to bed. It’s Antonio’s turn to sleep on our couch.
Antonio and I are alone in the living room. He takes my face in his hands and kisses me slowly. My body immediately responds to his touch. He lays me on the couch. I run my fingers through his hair and down his back. We lay kissing and touching for a while. Then without warning, Antonio picks me up. My legs wrap around his waist like this morning. He walks me to my room and lays me on my bed.
Heat pools in my belly. Antonio skims his hand up my thigh, my waist, my stomach, and rests it on my breast.
“Are you ready?” he asks huskily, staring into my eyes.
I flush and cover my face with my hands, embarrassed. I know what he means; I’m just discomfited at the question.
“I don’t want to do anything to scare you or fuck this up...so I’m asking. Are you ready?”
I pause and don’t answer.
“...or do you want to wait?” he adds.
Through my fingers I reply, “Yes, I’m ready.” I really am. I’m just nervous.
Antonio closes the door to the room and kneels back on the bed. The only light is soft from outside. He gently lifts my sweater over my head, I shift to help him. His eyes are dark and lustful. He cups my breasts again, and I moan in- voluntarily. He reaches behind me and unclasps my bra. He slides it down my arms and tosses it aside.
“I want nothing between us,” he whispers. He strips his own shirt off and kisses me again. He unbuttons my jeans and slips them down my legs. My heart hammers.
“I want you so much Megan,” he says as he slips off his own jeans and covers me with his body.
We wake up naked and wrapped around each other in my bed. I shift, and I feel a faint soreness between my legs. Images of last night flood back to me, and I reel from happiness. Antonio shifts beside me, and I snuggle against him tighter.
“I love you, Megan,” he says.
“I love you, too.” I reply, and we fall back to sleep.
*****
Antonio:
No nightmares last night, I think to myself... I didn’t hear Erin screaming. Last night, despite the drama, was the best night of my life. Megan is mine, and I’m never going to let her go. Ever.
My phone rings. It’s on the coffee table in the living room. I get up and throw my jeans on. I scoop up the condom from the floor. I need to hide it in the trash before anyone else gets up.
I get to the phone. It’s Pop.
“Eh, Tonio, how’s it goin’ there?”
“Good, Pop.”
“Any trouble?”
“No. Nothing.”
“Good. That’s good.”
“You get anything from the asshole yesterday?”
“Not yet. That guy is so strung out. He is on some hard core shit. I bet he didn’t even feel his fingers breakin’. I think he’s a lost cause, Pop.”
“Tail him, see what he’s doin’, who he’s getting his stuff from. The money has to come from somewhere. He’s got one week, Tonio.”
“Okay,” I say.
I walk to the bathroom while talking to Pop.
“Alright, Tonio. Love you, bye.”
“Love you too, Pop. Bye.”
I hang up and take care of business in the bathroom. I walk out and see Vito coming out of Erin’s room yawning. He is shuffling straight to our suite.
I call out to stop him. “Why are you comin’ from Erin’s room?” I ask.
Vito turns to look at me. “She was having a shitty night.” He points to her room. “Well, you would have known that if you weren’t ‘busy’.” He uses his fingers to air quote.
“I was right next door. How did you know she was having a bad night?”
“I checked on her a couple of hours ago. I figured you were in Megan’s room when you weren’t on the couch. I guess I was right,” his voice is sarcastic.
“I heard her in the next suite last time,” I say, annoyed.
“She wasn’t screaming, but she was fidgety and restless—talking in her sleep.”
“What was she talking about?”
“Ugh...a lot of shit. Mannegia! I gotta piss.” Vito walks away.
I make coffee. Vito joins me back in the kitchen. He grabs a mug and fills it.
My phone beeps with a text. It’s Patrick.
How are the girls?
Fine. Mostly. You want to talk to them? I type back.
Not yet.
Erin comes out of her room. She is clearly still angry.
“How’d you sleep?”
“I think I’d sleep better if you get the ox out of my bed,” she throws out defensively, heading to the bathroom.
“Get changed. I’m taking you to breakfast,” I order.
“What? Just us?” she asks.
“Yeah, just us.”
All I wanted to do was crawl back into bed with Megan, but this was something I had to do. I let Vito and Megan know that I am taking Erin to breakfast alone. There’s just some shit that needs to be sorted out. This kid has to face the music.
We pull up to a little diner off campus. It’s small with a neon sign that says Breakfast and Lunch — straight and to-the-point advertising. Erin is quiet for the ride. We sit in the last booth in the back. I face the entrance. I always face the doorway in restaurants. Theaters and public places too. You always need to know exits and points of entry.
This shit about her Dad has been bothering me since yesterday. “I want to talk about your Dad.”
Erin looks up from her computer-printed menu surprised.
“I want to explain things to you in a way that will hopefully help you,” I continue. “A fireman doesn’t hesitate. He just runs into that burning building. He just does it. It’s who he is.”
“What are you talking about?” she asks, annoyed.
“I’m trying to explain things to you.”
“What things?” Her voice is condescending and sassy.
“Don’t pull that shit with me.” My voice is low and commanding.
“What shit?”
“That shit. Stop giving me attitude. I’m not the one who has been lying to you for fourteen years. I’m given’ it to you straight.”
Erin stops and looks ashamed.
“Listen, sometimes we’re born to do things. Take my pop for example. When his Pop died, he acquired the business. He doesn’t force anyone to borrow money — they come to him — whether it’s for gambling debts, drugs, or whatever they need it for. Pop doesn’t force them, and the people who borrow know the consequences. There are rules, unwritten guidelines. These people are not innocents. They’re into big shit.”
Erin’s eyes fill with tears. “But why does my Dad kill people?”
I glance around the room as the question leaves her lips and tap my fingers on the table.
“It’s in his blood. It’s what he knows... He’s obviously good at it. He’s been doing it a long time. Your father dishes out the ultimate consequence for not paying or running...or even trying to push my pop out.”
“Why would anyone want to push Mr. Delisi out or take ov
er?”
“That’s simple—power,” I answer.
“Power? Why?”
“Power can be a more dominant drug than meth or heroine. It makes them feel important. They need it.”
Erin stops to consider this. I can tell the wheels are turning in her mind.
“But this is the most important part,” I say. “No one knows your Dad is the Cleaner. It’s important that they never do.”
“Why?”
“People would come after you. Just like the other night. The anonymity of the Cleaner keeps people loyal and fearful.”
Erin wipes her tearing eyes with her fingers. The waitress comes over and takes our order. I monotonously order bacon, eggs, and coffee. Erin orders a muffin.
My phone rings. It’s Uncle Tutti.
“Eh, Tonio. How are you?”
“Good, Uncle. How are you?” Erin just sits in the booth, watching me talk on the phone.
“Where are you, kid? Haven’t seen you around?”
“Oh, you know... I’m all over, doing stuff for Pop.” Obviously, Pop didn’t tell Uncle Tutti where I am or what I’m doing, so I’m not about to.
“You chasing a runner?” he asks.
“Yeah, something like that.” Well, it’s not totally a lie.
The waitress plops dishes on the table in front of Erin and me.
“I’m out having breakfast and it just arrived.”
“Oh, okay. Talk to ya soon, Tonio. Bye.”
“Bye.” I hang up.
“Who was that?” Erin asks.
“My Uncle Tutti. He is my grandmother’s younger brother.”
“Why didn’t you tell him where you were?”
“This is a good lesson. Information is very important. You never share it if you don’t have to. My pop didn’t tell him where I am... I, sure as hell, am not telling him.”
“But he’s your uncle. You can’t tell him?”
“No. Never give anyone extra information they don’t need to know. He doesn’t need to know where I am.”