“Ah, Shannon, you are so special. You are unique among women. If this gown makes you uncomfortable, it’s gone.” And he caught the hem of the gown and swept it over her head, capturing her cry of anguish with his lips and turning it into one of passion.
“I’ll design something just for you, Shannon,” he whispered between kisses. “I’ll take the gold of the sun and the silver of the moon and give them to you.”
She lost her last measure of reality as he stepped away, removed his clothes, then pulled her close again. They seemed to fit together as if she’d designed her curves to fill the planes of his body. And the connection of heat came as swiftly and strongly as it always did. She let her head fall back limply, unable to support her fluid limbs any longer. And she felt herself being lifted in arms so secure that she knew she would be safe.
As he lowered her to the bed, he whispered, “Don’t be afraid, Shannon. I’ll be gentle.”
He leaned over her, looking down in the pale light, resting his body on his elbow. “You are so lovely. Your hair—” He spread it over the pillow, letting the wispy strands sift through his fingers. “I’ve dreamed of this, and you, from the first time I saw you.”
“And I of you,” she whispered, absorbing the intensity of the stern expression on his face. Savage power and desire were there, but there was more. Almost hidden by his control was a vulnerability, a fear, a yearning that she sensed and understood. For it was that yearning that forged the bond between them.
Jonathan caught her nipple in his hot mouth and pulled on it. For a moment her heart seemed to stop. Then as if she were watching herself from afar, she saw herself lift her breast to him, asking for more.
She made no attempt to resist, for she knew that he would refuse to let her go. Even now he was increasing the pressure of his mouth on her nipples, burning them with his touch. Desperately she tried to hold back, afraid to follow where he wanted her to go. She heard herself making little mewing sounds, murmuring his name over and over, “Jonathan, Jonathan, please …”
“Soon, my love, my beautiful love,” he whispered, as he caressed her with his lips and moved his fingertips to the moist heat between her legs.
They gave themselves over to the wonder of the touch and taste and the beauty of what they were feeling, to the relentless heat that burned their imprints into their skins and deep within their souls. Nothing else mattered but this time and this place, and their loving. They left their mortal world far behind.
In some dim corner of her mind Shannon knew that she should pull away. But all her life she’d known there was more, there was something waiting, something precious and beautiful. And at last she’d found it.
She opened her eyes and allowed herself to see the power of the man. He was dark and wild, and she knew that, for her, life would never be the same again. She’d been singed by his heat and marked for all time.
Willingly, with certainty, her thighs parted and she thrust against him, opening herself to that part of him that fitted most perfectly of all.
Beyond the window the snow began to fall, softly, quietly cushioning the lovers, making the world fresh and new. Inside the turret room Jonathan felt as if he were being remade.
“Are you sure, Shannon?” he asked, raising up on his elbows as he looked down at her. “I don’t know that I have anything left inside me to give.”
“I’m asking for nothing, Jonathan.”
“No,” he said with sadness in his voice, “you’re wrong. You’re asking for everything.”
Later she lay in the darkness listening to the sound of Jonathan’s breathing.
There might never be another moment like it. She didn’t want to think about what had happened. She only wanted to feel and float in the wonderful aftermath of their lovemaking.
Jonathan hadn’t spoken. She’d felt him stiffen in surprise when he’d realized that she was a virgin, but that had been but a momentary pause, followed by a whispered “My love.” Then the world had catapulted into some great explosion of heat that had carried them beyond the edge of the universe and through the magical Milky Way, where all the fairies live.
Later he’d kissed her gently and gathered her into his strong arms, where they lay, still entwined, still connected by their ever-present thread of heat.
She’d thought he was about to leave when he pushed himself up on one elbow and gazed down at her.
“What’s wrong?” she finally whispered.
“At this moment everything is right with the world.”
“Then why—”
“Why didn’t you tell me that I was the first?”
“I couldn’t.”
“I’m very—very grateful, Shannon. That’s never happened before. I wasn’t prepared.”
She didn’t know what to say. He sounded so stern, not at all happy, as if he didn’t quite know what to do with the knowledge. So she lay silent, looking up at his strong face.
“Why do you keep looking at me?” she asked.
He might have answered her honestly and said how very beautiful she was, how humble he felt, but those words were too new, too revealing. He couldn’t get them out. He was afraid of making the same mistake twice. Suppose he’d given her a child? He thought he was being careful before. This time he’d never even considered the possibility. That loss of control was unsettling.
Always he’d been in control. Now he was overwhelmed, and he knew his concern was frightening her. What had happened was done and couldn’t be changed. She didn’t need to share his fears.
“I guess,” he finally said with a forced chuckle, then realized that it was more real than he thought, “I guess I’m still trying to figure out what all this has to do with being freed from possums.”
She relaxed, feeling the tension flow out of her. It was going to be all right. He didn’t regret having made love to her.
She smiled, following his lead. “I don’t believe I’ll tell you about the possums just yet. I think I like the way you ask questions.”
“Do you?” Unexpectedly he planted a light, happy kiss on her lips, a kiss that deepened instantly.
“Is that a question?” she finally asked, her voice breathless from the kiss.
Right or wrong, he rationalized, what was done was done. Repetition couldn’t make anything any different.
“A question? Oh, my love, you bet it is.”
When Shannon woke the next morning, Jonathan was gone. In his place was Kaseybelle, the doll who’d been her lifelong companion.
For so long the only thing that had stayed constant in Shannon’s life had been Kasey. The imaginary child, who had been her only friend and confidante had eventually become her livelihood. And Shannon had poured all her love into Kaseybelle the Chocolate Fairy. Now Jonathan had brought a different kind of love.
Love. That thought took her breath away. Could she be falling in love with Jonathan? No, she didn’t want to fall in love. Every time her mother had fallen in love, she’d seemed to get a little crazy, and Shannon had always been the one to catch the brunt of her disappointment when the love went bad.
And it always had.
Shannon stretched and felt something rough scratch her neck. Pulling back the covers, she found the sprig of mistletoe caught by its ribbon in her hair.
Mistletoe. Suddenly the bad thoughts disappeared. Until now she’d never understood the frantic abandon that had compelled her mother. Shannon hadn’t expected last night. Being with Jonathan was like a fantasy, and even if she never had that fantasy again, nothing could take the magic away from her. She captured the sprig in her hands and closed her eyes, willing all her doubts away.
The smell and feel of Jonathan was everywhere. She’d never be able to erase it from her body, or her mind. For one special moment she’d let go of the past, the restraints she’d always placed on herself, and she’d let herself feel.
Shannon lay still, warm beneath the covers, allowing herself one last moment of remembering while she was still safe from the self-rec
riminations that were sure to follow. She didn’t know what would happen now. She’d learned not to expect anything make-believe to last. She’d lived out her fairy tale come to life.
And now it was morning. And Jonathan had gone.
She was alone.
Though she knew it was a temporary thing, the feeling had been exquisite. Because of her mother, she was prepared for the pain of its ending. She’d watched her mother climb to the height of excitement and expectation, then fall just as swiftly into a deep valley of despair.
With that thought, the doubts came quick and hard. And she was forced to face the truth. No matter how wonderful it had been, last night had been a mistake. Allowing Jonathan to make love to her was the last crack in the walls of her solitude. She’d given him the power to hurt her, and only she knew how devastating that kind of hurt could be. It had taken her years to get over her mother’s casual neglect of her and even longer to get past the emotional pain of her mother’s final rejection.
She ought to leave now, before the bond between her and Jonathan became any stronger. She ought to, but the connection would still be there. Even now she felt the constant thrumming that tied her to him. The words from some old song flitted through her memory, something to the effect that the singer had stayed too late at the fair. She might as well get up and face the aftermath of the night before, face Jonathan Dream in the light of day.
Even thinking about him brought a flush of color to her cheeks, and she hurried to wash her face and brush her teeth. She braided her hair and tied it with a bow. There was a reserve about her as she selected a pair of tailored navy pants and a bulky red pullover sweater. Warm socks and a pair of ankle-high boots, and she was ready to face the day.
The breakfast room was empty, so she proceeded on to the sun room, where DeeDee was busy with her tutor. In the kitchen she found Mrs. Butterfield cutting up dried cherries and pineapple for a fruitcake she intended to bake later.
“Good morning, Shannon. My, don’t you look—energetic today. Did you sleep well?”
“Ah, yes. I did.”
Shannon poured herself a cup of coffee and uncovered the warming oven where Mrs. Butterfield always left a pastry or biscuit. This morning she found two blueberry muffins, already buttered. Helping herself to one, she walked across the kitchen and peered out the back door.
“The snow seems to have stopped.”
“Thank goodness. It’s like one of DeeDee’s Band-Aids. It covers up the booboos, and then it melts and makes everything worse than before.”
Shannon debated the wisdom of her next question, but knew she couldn’t plan her morning until she had an answer. “Have you seen Mr. Dream this morning?”
“Not since first light. He came down bright and early, whistling. Swallowed his breakfast whole and sailed out the door. He and Lawrence left an hour ago.”
“Oh.” She didn’t want to admit how disappointed she was. Of course there was no reason for Jonathan not to leave the house. His life didn’t stop just because he’d spent the night in her bed. He probably hadn’t even thought about it this morning. After all the women he’d shared a bed with, why would he think their time together was special?
“Jonathan told me to tell you to be ready. He is taking his two favorite ladies out to dinner tonight. He said you were to put on your dancing shoes.”
“Out? Jonathan is taking us out?”
“Well, I don’t know that he actually meant out. Sometimes he has Lawrence bring in something special. And now and then he flies to that place he calls Dreamland in Vegas.”
“What place in Vegas? Have you been there?”
“Not me. That’s where he used to have all those wild parties and those DreamGirls. They were the women who modeled for him. I don’t go there. It’s not my kind of thing.”
“DreamGirls?” Those women? Shannon had managed to put her employer’s former lifestyle out of her mind. But that couldn’t be. He was Jonathan Dream, and she would never be one of those girls. There was no point in kidding herself.
For the rest of the day Shannon had trouble concentrating. Her latest ad copy didn’t flow right. She turned her attention to giving instructions to the television production company about the episode that took Kaseybelle to a castle on top of a mountain to visit her friend, Deanna. DeeDee would see the connection right away, and she’d be so excited.
Shannon implored them to do a rush on this story because she wanted it to show DeeDee that a person could overcome fear. The producer agreed to substitute it for the episode he was currently working on, if Shannon would help with the drawing. She agreed. Next she called Willie, who refused to let her get off the phone until she explained what had brought on her sudden change of heart about staying.
“I know something happened, Shan, I can tell by your voice. I don’t have to be there to know. Tell Willie the truth. Do I have to worry about you and the Big Bad Wolf?”
“He isn’t a wolf! Jonathan Dream’s a perfect gentleman.”
“And he hasn’t tried anything?”
“Of course not.”
“Why don’t I believe you, Shannon Summers?”
“All right,” she confessed with a nervous laugh. “He did kiss me. But he didn’t force me. In fact, Willie, I kissed him back. It was … nice.”
“Nice!” Her old friend and business partner shouted. “I shouldn’t have let you go off up there without me, even if that associate of his did promise to keep an eye on you.”
“What associate?”
“The man with the patch, John Drew. I think I trust John, but I don’t trust Jonathan Dream as far as I can throw him, and you know that I can’t even hit that alligator-mouth basketball goal you hung on my door with my sponge ball from three feet away.”
For a moment Shannon almost told Willie that John Drew and Jonathan Dream were the same person, but she remembered her promise. If Jonathan wanted to hide behind his associate, she’d protect him. “Willie, don’t worry. I’ll be home in less than two weeks. I’ll be safe until then, I promise.”
But would she? She was only beginning to realize what it meant to open Pandora’s Box. She might not be a DreamGirl, but she was in the castle and she’d already learned that she couldn’t refuse Jonathan anything.
“If you don’t mind my saying so, Jonathan, I wonder if you know what you’re doing?” Lawrence was leaning against the fender of the limo, watching Jonathan and the mechanic fussing over the bright-blue helicopter Jonathan had bought the previous year.
“We’re just getting this copter ready to fly.”
“And where are you flying it?”
“I thought we’d go to Fantasy World. I’ve made arrangements to have the park opened just for us.”
“For who? John or Jonathan?”
“Does it matter?”
“Perhaps not. But Fantasy World is on top of a mountain. There’s snow on the ground and it’s night. Don’t you think it’s a little cold for that?”
“Of course it is, that’s why I’m getting everything ready. We’ll go up by helicopter. The pilot can land right in the middle of Ghost Town. We’re being met by Santa’s snowmobiles. There’ll be battery-operated portable heaters and hand warmers and fur hats. We’ll have our own private party.”
“Why don’t you just drive down the valley to Santa Land? It’s open and it’s in a heated building.”
“You know that Jonathan Dream never goes out in public,” Jonathan snapped. “DeeDee wouldn’t understand my deception. What do you think would happen if some nosy person started asking questions about what happened? No, I won’t subject DeeDee to that. I’ve kept her safe and I’ll keep on doing so.”
“That’s not exactly what I meant when I asked you if you knew what you were doing. I was referring to Shannon Summers. She’s not like Mona, Jon. She’s very fragile. This could be a mistake.”
“Dammit, Lawrence, stop reminding me. I know she’s not like Mona. And I certainly know what a tragedy Mona was. I knew it then, and I live
with it every day of my life, every time I look in the mirror. No, Shannon is good and … special.”
“So, we’re going to play for a while, then what? Do you really think that she’ll say, ‘Night-night, Jonathan. It’s been fun. See you around.’ ”
Jonathan stopped tinkering and leaned forward, resting his forehead against the copter. “I guess not. But, dammit, it isn’t fair. I did the right thing. I can’t change what happened. Aren’t I entitled to a life?”
“Certainly, my old friend. But this time do it right. Don’t let the hormones harness you. If you want this woman, be honest about it, and be honest with her. Tell her the truth about Mona.”
“That wouldn’t be right.”
“You pretend to be your own assistant, yet your conscience won’t let you tell the truth about Mona.”
“It’s because of my conscience that I can’t.”
“Just remember, Shannon is a nice person, and much too sympathetic. I have the feeling her life hasn’t exactly been a bed of roses. She’s a lot like you, alone and vulnerable. If you screw things up, you could have a lot more on your conscience than a woman strung out on drugs and a little girl with mangled legs. Don’t hurt her, Jon.”
“What makes you think I’ll hurt her? What makes you think this is anything more than a business relationship?”
“You, Jonathan. How many times have you decked yourself out like a Ninja and cut down a Christmas tree? How many times have you invited a woman out for an evening and brought your daughter along?”
“Shannon thinks that DeeDee ought to get out more. This is for DeeDee.”
“And what about last night, was that for DeeDee?”
“Last night?”
“Last night. You weren’t in your room.”
“How do you know? Were you checking on me?”
“You mean aside from the fact that this morning you looked like the cat who swallowed the canary? No. I know you weren’t in your room because you failed to flip the lock switch on the doors and sometime after midnight Hap walked in the front door. That set off the alarm, and I went to check on you. You do remember the reporter from that tabloid who managed to get on the estate, don’t you?”
Night Dreams Page 8