The Ragamuffins

Home > Memoir > The Ragamuffins > Page 26
The Ragamuffins Page 26

by Anna King


  Like a woman twice her age Sadie rose unsteadily to her feet. Brushing the kindly nurse gently to one side she said solemnly, ‘Thank you fer all yer kindness, Nurse. I appreciate it, even though I never said so at the time. I’ll be off now, I’ve gotta see ter Lily’s boys like I promised.’

  The nurse looked at the tired woman with sympathy. ‘Don’t do anything rash, dear. I know you promised to take care of your friend’s children, but I’ve witnessed many a deathbed promise, and while the person concerned genuinely means to keep that promise, it isn’t always possible to keep that vow made under the most distressing of circumstances. So don’t feel too bad if you change your mind. Taking on two children, especially children who are no relation to you, could be very difficult.’

  At the nurse’s words, Sadie sprang into life. ‘Thanks fer the advice, Nurse, but Lily was me friend. More ter the point, she’s dead because of me. That’s something I’m gonna ’ave ter live with fer the rest of me life. The least I can do is ter look after ’er boys, I owe her that much. Besides, I never make a promise I can’t keep.’ Gathering up her strength she continued firmly, ‘Now then, where’s the boys? Or should I say my boys, ’cos that’s what they are now.’

  The nurse stepped to one side, her expression worried. ‘It might not be that simple, dear. You can’t just take them, you know. You’ll have to go through the authorities.’ Seeing the look of anger flash over Sadie’s face, the nurse, who was used to irate patients and their families, continued in a calm voice. ‘It’s no good you looking at me like that, I don’t make the rules. If you were a relative it would be a different matter entirely.’ She paused, a conspiratorial expression coming into her eyes. ‘Then again, you could be their aunt for all anyone knows, or a cousin perhaps. If that’s so, then the authorities will be only too pleased to wash their hands of them. There are enough homeless children roaming the streets as it is. I’m sure they would be only too pleased to be spared the time and expense of placing them in the workhouse. You’d have to fill in a form, of course, stating your relationship to the children, but that’s merely a formality. The authorities rarely check up on the relevant documents, they’re much too busy elsewhere.’ Arching her eyebrows the nurse gazed expectantly at Sadie.

  Immediately picking up on the nurse’s meaning Sadie bristled. ‘Well, of course I’m their auntie. I wouldn’t saddle meself with two kids if I didn’t ’ave to, would I? You give me that form ter fill in then take me to me nephews, wherever you’ve put them… Only…’

  ‘Yes, dear?’

  A wave of embarrassment swept over Sadie, then she shook off the feeling angrily. This was no time for false pride. Her chin thrust out defiantly she said tersely, ‘I can’t read or write. Well, not properly.’

  The nurse’s face relaxed. ‘Oh, is that all? You come with me, dear, and we’ll fill in the form together, if that’s all right with you?’

  Sadie nodded, a wave of gratitude flooding through her tired body and with it a sudden burst of fresh emotion. As she went to follow the uniformed figure she said in a shaking voice and on the point of tears,

  ‘’Ang on a minute, Nurse. Could… could I ’ave a bit of time with me mate? Just… just ter say good— goodbye properly.’

  When the nurse left the ward Sadie stood for a few minutes before approaching her friend for the last time. Leaning over the still figure, the wrapped bundle of her dead baby placed in her lifeless arms, Sadie kissed Lily on the forehead, and with that simple act fresh tears spilled from her reddened eyes.

  ‘Goodbye, mate. I’m gonna miss yer. But I’ll take care of your boys, like I promised. I probably won’t be as good a mum like you was, Lil, but… but I’ll do me best. Oh, Lil… Lil. I’m so… so sorry. Pl— please, please, Lil, forgive me. I loved yer, yer soppy cow. Only… only I didn’t realise it till… till now.’

  Her body began to shake with renewed grief, and though it was genuine, there was a thread of guilt tormenting her. She would keep her word to her dead friend, but she felt no affection for the Knight boys. To her they were just two scruffy kids who happened to belong to her friend. The only child she wanted, had ever wanted was Molly. Now she was gone forever. For even if found, and Sadie prayed fervently she would be, for the alternative was unthinkable, she would never be able to keep her. If… no! Not if, she silently corrected herself, when she was found, she would be returned to her brother and would live with him and the Parkers, while she would be left with two grief-stricken, bewildered boys of whom she knew absolutely nothing. With tears blinding her vision she felt an arm go round her shoulder and let herself be led from the room. Sobbing uncontrollably her mind kept repeating over and over again, ‘Oh, Molly. My sweet, sweet Molly. Be safe, my angel. Wherever you are, please be safe. I don’t care if I can’t have you with me like I wanted, as long as you’re safe.’

  Chapter Twenty-five

  ‘Arthur, where have you been all night?’ Ellen stood in the doorway of the bedroom tying her red dressing gown tighter around her waist, her long hair falling loosely around her face and shoulders.

  The sight of her brought an ache of pain and loneliness in Arthur such as he’d never felt. He had stayed at the Hope and Anchor until closing time, something he had never done before.

  But no matter how much he had drunk, his mind had remained clear. After leaving the pub he had wandered the streets for hours trying to convince himself that he and Ellen would somehow weather the storm that had entered their lives in the shape of Ted Parker. During those dark hours he had done a lot of soul searching, and he hadn’t liked what he’d seen. But he had tried to convince himself that he had always acted out of chivalry. Now, seeing her looking so young, so fresh, a flash of clarity came to him. Ellen didn’t belong to him – she never had and never would. Agnes had been right when she’d accused him of marrying the young girl for his own selfish reasons, instead of adopting her, as any decent man with true honourable intentions would have done. But whatever happened in the future he would still have the memories of the time they had spent together. They had been the happiest days of his life and he would treasure them always. Now he had to undo the harm he had caused and let Ellen go while she still had some affection for him. The fact that he had already lost her was clear, but despite that awful night when he had forced himself on her, a memory that had tormented him day and night, Ellen might still stay with him out of kindness and some sort of misguided loyalty – she was that kind of woman, a rarity in this day and age. But, oh God! It would be the hardest thing he’d ever had to do in his life. Afraid his habitual weakness would let him down, he began his rehearsed words before he changed his mind.

  Clearing his throat gruffly he began buttoning up his coat again, careful to avoid Ellen’s searching stare. ‘I’m joining the search party for young Molly. It was the talk of the pub last night, and made me realise how selfish I’ve been. I should have been thinking of the missing child, instead of my own feelings – but then that’s what I’ve always done, think about myself.’ Keeping his face averted he continued. ‘Oh, I never did it deliberately, but nevertheless I did. I’ve been a selfish beggar, but it’s not too late to rectify the harm I’ve done, especially to you… No, don’t, Ellen, let me finish,’ he said quickly as he heard the rustle of her slippered feet approaching. ‘This is hard enough as it is. I’m afraid that if I look at you, I’ll change my mind, so just stay quiet and listen, please.’

  He sensed rather than saw Ellen stop in her tracks, but she was near enough for him to smell the subtle perfume she always wore, and it was nearly the undoing of him. Buttoning and unbuttoning his coat, his fingers shaking with nerves he said, ‘I should never have married you, Ellen. It wasn’t fair on you. The plain truth is, I took advantage of a vulnerable, innocent young girl. I even convinced myself I was acting like some kind of knight in shining armour.’ He gave a nervous laugh. ‘Can you imagine a more ludicrous image? Agnes saw right through me, and my selfish motives, and she was right.’ He shook his head slowly as
his guilty conscience continued to torment him.

  ‘She’s another one I hurt. I never intended to, but I did. It’s like I’ve been wearing blinkers for most of my life, but walking the streets at night, alone, with no distractions, it was as if those blinkers were suddenly lifted, and I saw myself as if for the first time. Oh, I don’t mean my weakness and lack of gumption, I’ve always known that. Maybe that was part of my reason for wanting to make you my wife. I thought people might look on me with some respect for marrying a young, pretty girl. But I was wrong again. They were laughing at me behind my back all the time. Probably making bets on how long it would be before you came to your senses and walked out on me. Well, I can’t right the wrong I did Agnes, but I can you.’ Now he did look at Ellen. She was standing as still as a statue, her hands holding the neck of her dressing gown together. ‘I heard what Ted Parker said that night, about you being able to get an annulment on the grounds that the marriage hadn’t been consummated, and he was right, though I wouldn’t have thought he would know of such legal matters. But that’s beside the point. We can’t do anything about it now, not while Micky’s sister is still missing, but once she’s found, we can start putting the wheels in motion to getting the marriage annulled.’

  As his words sank in Ellen stammered, ‘But… but, Arthur, that isn’t true, we…’

  Raising his hand Arthur said quietly. ‘What happened that night is between you and me, and I for one certainly don’t want my despicable action becoming public knowledge. I know there’s been gossip, started no doubt by Agnes, but like I said, only we know the real truth. So what do you say, Ellen? I’m giving you the opportunity to leave me, I’m letting you go, love. But you’d better make your mind up quickly, because… I don’t know if I’m strong enough to… to…’

  In spite of his valiant efforts to stay in control, his voice cracked and tears stung the back of his eyes. Desperate not to let Ellen see his distress he made for the door. Swallowing hard he said huskily, ‘I’d best be off. The search party is gathering outside Hackney police station at six o’clock, I don’t want to miss them. I don’t know what time I’ll be back. Perhaps it would be better if the shop remains closed today. I’m sure people will understand why. Goodbye, Ellen.’

  Before Ellen could speak Arthur was gone. Her legs shaking, Ellen sank down gratefully onto the first chair she came to, her mind hardly daring to believe what her ears had heard. She was free. It was what she had wanted since the first time she had realised she was in love with Ted, so why wasn’t she feeling any joy? Why did she feel like crying instead? Lifting her eyes to the closed door she whispered, ‘Oh, Arthur. Poor, poor Arthur. I’m sorry.’

  Yet even as she spoke the words, a feeling of relief and elation flooded over her. Soon she would be a free woman. The pathway to a life with Ted had been cleared. But how could she feel these emotions when young Molly was still missing? Her mind in turmoil, she crept into the bedroom and looked in on the sleeping boy. The extra sleeping draught had done the trick. Carefully she climbed onto the double bed and put her arm around the thin shoulders affectionately. Laying her head against Micky’s back she closed her eyes and hugged the young boy with all the fierce, protective love a mother would feel for a son.

  * * *

  Creeping as silently as possible Agnes led Molly through the mass of trees that seemed to close in on them no matter which way they went. Agnes had been sure she would remember the way she had come in once the dawn broke, but she was wrong. She was hopelessly lost, but on no account must the child know they were probably going round in circles. Every so often Agnes would stop and give the little girl a reassuring cuddle, as much for her own benefit as for the child’s. Grimly Agnes listened in hope for the sound of raised voices and trampling feet, but there was nothing apart from the birds twittering and the occasional rustle of a small animal scrambling through the undergrowth. At first both woman and child had jumped at the slightest sound, but now, after nearly an hour, they had become used to the noises of the forest. Stopping for a rest Agnes leant against one of the many oak trees that populated the woods keeping Molly tight by her side. If only she had some way to tell the time. It seemed to have been light for well over an hour now, and still there was no sight or sound of the search party. Surely they’d be here soon. She couldn’t keep going on the way they had been. For all she knew they might be heading further into the forest, rather than out of it. The best thing would be to stay where they were and wait to be rescued.

  Besides, the child was nearly dead on her feet. Not that she had complained, the poor little love. There weren’t many children of her age who could be so brave in the circumstances, not after what she had been through. A rush of affection flowed through Agnes as she looked down at the pretty, heart-shaped face – a feeling that was quickly replaced by guilt as she remembered that it was she who had helped that evil bastard get his hands on her. Then her head came up defiantly as she tried to justify herself. All right, so she had been stupid enough to play into Kenneth’s hands, but he himself had been thwarted by the intervention of the woman called Sadie, the woman Molly had spoken about during their seemingly endless trek.

  Agnes could still feel Kenneth’s hands round her throat when he’d discovered the child gone, thinking she had had some part in the removal of his intended prey. Sinking down onto the grass, she cradled Molly in her lap, her thoughts turning to the other woman Molly had spoken of with affection, Lily Knight, the woman Kenneth had murdered, together with her unborn baby. Her only comfort now was the knowledge that, as John Smith had said, the man she had known as Kenneth Wells would hang for his crimes.

  In spite of her thoughts she remained alert for any unusual sounds, but as time passed and with it the undoubted arrival of the search party got closer, Agnes began to relax a little. So when she heard a rustle she didn’t stir, thinking it to be yet another wild animal running about in its natural habitat – until Molly let out a high, piercing scream. Too late Agnes tried to rise, only to be knocked down by a heavy clenched fist to her forehead. Stunned she lay still, unable to move, her vision blinded momentarily by the cruel blow. But she could still hear, and the words, spoken by the familiar and now hated voice, chilled her to the very bones of her body.

  ‘You stupid, ignorant old hag. Did you really think you could get the better of me?’ He let out a laugh that to Agnes’ fuddled mind sounded on the verge of hysteria. ‘I should have known the kid wouldn’t have the nerve to make a run for it without help. But I never thought it would be you. Did you really think you’d get one over on me? Better people than you have tried to outwit me and failed. I’ve been caught, oh, yes, I’ll grant you that, but there was never enough evidence to keep me in jail for long. But those days are over. They’ll never catch me again.’ He was so close Agnes could smell his sour breath. ‘And I’ll tell you why, seeing as you won’t be able to pass on the information, because I’m going to kill you, just like I killed that other slag who tried to keep me from my Molly.’ He let out a high-pitched laugh. ‘You know what’s so funny, Agnes? Well, I’ll tell you. Molly and me were in that hut all along. I heard the so-called search party break down the door, all full of themselves thinking they’d cornered me, and what did they find? Nothing, absolutely nothing. And this is the best part. You listening, you pathetic old cow?’

  Agnes’ head was beginning to clear but she remained inert, biding her time, hoping to lure Kenneth into a false sense of security. For if he thought she was incapable of movement there was a chance, a slim chance, but a chance all the same, that she might be able to catch him unaware, long enough to let Molly escape. Her heart leapt in fright as she realised she hadn’t heard any sound from Molly since that awful scream. But Kenneth was still talking.

  ‘They didn’t find me because I was underneath the hut in the basement. Yeah, that’s right, that run-down old hut actually has a basement. But no one will ever find it. Who would think of looking for it in a dilapidated old hut? I don’t know how it came to be
there, perhaps the hut was built over it, but who cares? I only found it by chance, and I’ve hidden it well. And now, my pitiful old friend, it’s time to say goodbye. Time’s getting on, and I don’t intend to be out in the open when the good people of the East End and the coppers start arriving.’

  Agnes was fully conscious now, still dizzy, but alert to the situation. Opening her eyes she saw the madness in his eyes, eyes that widened in shock as Agnes grabbed hold of his coat and screamed at the top of her voice, ‘Run, Molly. Run… run, sweetheart.’

  Taken off guard, Kenneth relaxed his hold on Molly, but the terrified child remained rooted to the spot, as she had on seeing Lily Knight’s blood-soaked body.

  Then Agnes screamed again, ‘Molly, love. Run… Please, run… run.’

  And this time Molly did as she was bid. Stumbling and running blindly she ran sobbing, not knowing where she was going, expecting the nasty man to catch her at any minute.

  Seeing Molly run gave Agnes a strength she didn’t know she possessed, a strength brought about by sheer desperation and a desire to save the life of a child she hardly knew. As she continued to wrestle with Stokes, she saw out of the corner of her eye that his right hand was bandaged and bloodstained, and the sight gave her fresh hope.

  So that was why she had managed to hold him at bay for so long: he had the use of only one hand. Twisting and turning she managed to bring up her knee, ramming it with all her remaining strength into his groin. As her knee found its mark, Kenneth let out a scream of pain and rage, but Agnes wasn’t finished yet. As Stokes reeled back, she grabbed his injured hand and savagely ground it into the dirt beneath the grass. Almost out of his head with pain Kenneth lashed out with his good hand, catching Agnes a crushing blow under her chin. Her head jolted back before crashing onto a large, sharp stone.

  Kenneth watched as Agnes’ body jerked once then lay still.

 

‹ Prev