‘Do you know, Jack, I believe you really did get a little way down my throat, then! At any rate you managed the ‘tripotage de luette’ that Ylette’s friend recommended so strongly!’
‘And I don’t think I ever got quite so far into your cunt, Flossie.’
‘That’s quite true; I felt your tongue touch a spot it had never reached before. And just wasn’t it lovely when you got there! It almost makes me spend again to think of it! But I am not going to be naughty any more. And to show you how truly virtuous I am feeling I’ll continue my story if you like. I want to get on with it, because I know you must be wondering all the time how a person of my age can have come to be so … what shall we say, Jack?’
‘Larky,’ I suggested.
‘Yes, ‘larky’ will do. Of course I have always been ‘older than my age’ as the saying goes, and my friendship with Ylette and all the lovely things she used to do to me made me ‘come on’ much faster than most girls. I ought to tell you that I got to be rather a favourite at school, and after it came to be known that Ylette and I were on gamahuching terms, I used to get little notes from almost every girl in the school over twelve, imploring me to sleep with her. One dear little thing even went so far as to give me the measurements of her tongue, which she had taken with a piece of string.’
‘Oh, I say, Flossie, come now – I can swallow a good deal but —’
‘You can indeed, Jack, as I have good reason to know! But all the same, it’s absolutely true. You can’t have any conception what French school-girls of fourteen or fifteen are. There is nothing they won’t do to get themselves gamahuched, and if a girl is pretty or fascinating or has particularly good legs, or specially large breasts, she may, if she likes, have a fresh admirer’s head under her petticoats every day in the week. Of course it’s all very wrong and dreadful, I know, but what else can you expect? In France gamahuching between grown-up men and women is a recognized thing –’
‘Not only in France, nowadays,’ I put in.
‘So I have heard. But at any rate in France everybody does it. Girls at school naturally know this, as they know most things. At that time of life – at my time of life, if you like – a girl thinks and dreams of nothing else. She cannot, except by some extraordinary luck, find herself alone with a boy or man. One day her girl chum at school pops her head under her petticoats and gamahuches her deliciously. How can you wonder if from that moment she is ready to go through fire and water to obtain the same pleasure?’
‘Go on, Flossie. You are simply delicious to-day!’
‘Don’t laugh, Jack. I am very serious about it. I don’t care how much a girl of (say) my age longs for a boy to be naughty with – it’s perfectly right and natural. What I think is bad is that she should begin by having a liking for a girl’s tongue inculcated into her. I should like to see boys and girls turned loose upon one another once a week or so at authorized gamahuching parties, which should be attended by masters and governesses (who would have to see that the other thing was not indulged in, of course). Then the girls would grow up with a good healthy taste for the other sex, and even if they did do a little gamahuching amongst themselves between whiles, it would only be to keep themselves going till the next ‘party’. By my plan a boy’s prick would be the central object of their desires, as it ought to be. Now I think that’s a very fine scheme, Jack, and as soon as I am a little older, I shall go to Paris and put it before the Minister of Education!’
‘But why wait, Flossie? Why not go now?’
‘Well, you see, if the old gentleman (I suppose he is old, isn’t he, or he wouldn’t be a minister?) – if he saw a girl in short frocks, he would think she had got some private object to serve in regard to the gamahuching parties. Whereas a grown-up person who had plainly left school might be supposed to be doing it unselfishly for the good of the rising generation.’
‘Yes, I understand that. But when you do go, Flossie, please take me or some other respectable person with you, because I don’t altogether trust that Minister of Education, and whatever the length of your frocks might happen to be at the time, I feel certain that, old or young, the moment you had explained your noble scheme, he would be wanting some practical illustrations on the office armchair!’
‘How dare you suggest such a thing, Jack! You are to understand, sir, that from henceforth my mouth is reserved for three purposes, to eat with, to talk with, and to kiss you with on whatever part of your person I may happen to fancy at the moment. By the way you won’t mind my making just one exception in favour of Eva, will you? She loves me to make her nipples stand with my tongue; occasionally too, we perform the “soixante-neuf.”’
‘When the next performance takes place, may I be there to see?’ I ejaculated fervently.
‘Oh, Jack, how shocking!’
‘Does it shock you, Flossie? Very well then I withdraw it, and apologize.’
‘You cannot withdraw it now. You have distinctly stated that you would like to be there when Eva and I have our next gamahuche.’
‘Well, I suppose I did say.’
‘Silence, sir,’ said Flossie in a voice of thunder, and shaking her brown head at me with inexpressible ferocity. ‘You have made a proposal of the most indecent character, and the sentence of the Court is that at the first possible opportunity you shall be held to that proposal. Meanwhile the Court condemns you to receive 250 kisses on various parts of your body, which it will at once proceed to administer. Now, sir, off with your clothes!’
‘Mayn’t I keep my —’
‘No, sir, you may not!’
The sentence of the Court was accordingly carried out to the letter, somewhere about three-fourths of the kisses being applied upon one and the same part of the prisoner to which the Court attached its mouth with extraordinary gusto.
* The fall title of this publication was, Flossie: Venus of Fifteen by One Who Knew this Charming Goddess and Worshipped at Her Shrine. When first published this book had a print run of 500 copies, all of which would have been for private circulation.
* ‘This is a fact, as every girl knows who has ever gamahuched and been gamahuched by the man or boy she loves. As a link, it beats f … ing out of the field. I’ve tried both and I know.’
Flossie.
(*) Don’t believe I ever said anything of the sort, but if I did, ‘methinks’ I’d better take this opportunity of withdrawing the statement.
Flossie.
* The first of these is a really serious one, but for this the impartial reader will see that the responsibility was divided.
* Uvula
Fifty Shades of Victorian Desire Page 31