by Skyy
If ever a guy stepped to Dakota with that lame “I like ’em thick,” or “I like big girls” line, Dakota dismissed them with the quickness. Trice had the pleasure of witnessing a dismissal herself.
“Girl, his ass was fine. Why did you kick him to the curb like that?” Trice had asked the first time she saw Dakota send a guy to the left for using one of those pickup lines. “And he said he liked ’em thick.” Trice slapped Dakota’s derrière. “And you thick. So what was the problem?”
“The problem is that a real man who just wanted me would have only seen me,” Dakota explained. “He wouldn’t have seen all my skin or the color of it. He would have just seen a beautiful woman he wanted to get with. Period.” She looked at Trice. “Just like with your dark skin. How many dudes have you had to cuss out for using that stupid line, ‘You so cute to be dark skinned?’ Why can’t you just be cute? Why the extra?”
“Yeah, you’re right. I can’t stand that ol’ color-struck shit.” Trice nodded. “I guess I never looked at it that way.”
“Well, it’s the same thing with me. Either a dude is going to see a beautiful woman he wants to get to know because of just that: she’s a beautiful woman he wants to get to know. Or he can keep it moving. And the fact that guys even think what they are saying is a compliment only makes them that much more of a jerk.”
“Say no more.” Trice put her hand up. “I feel you and I got your back.”
And her girls had had Dakota’s back ever since, which was why she was so upset about the fact that they wouldn’t be joining her in Vegas to have her back while there.
The waiter brought the girls’ food, made sure they had everything they needed, then left them to dig into their lunch specials. And everyone did with the exception of Dakota, who just sat there picking at her food.
“You acting like a preschooler who just got served carrots as a snack,” Shyla said to Dakota. “Girl, eat.”
Trice looked at her watch. “Yeah, we have to be back at work soon.”
Although the girls worked in different departments and on different teams, they each worked for the same insurance company. The three girls had all been working for the same company for the exact same amount of time. It was during training when they all actually met each other. Before that day six and a half years ago, none of the girls had known one another.
During the six weeks of training they became close, sharing lunch together each day. Once training was over, at first they were all on the same team, but over the years, due to promotions and transfers, they eventually ended up in different departments in the company. That didn’t change the fact that they’d become three peas in a pod and had experienced almost every memorable moment in their lives together since.
Dakota covered her face with her hands. “I know we have to get back to work, but I have lost my appetite. I’m just sad you guys aren’t coming to Vegas with me. I have never been to Vegas before and now here I’m going all by my lonesome. To be honest, hell, I’m scared.”
“Awwwww,” both Shyla and Trice said then each reached around the round table to hug Dakota, who sat between the two.
“Our Pooh Bear has to finally venture off into the forest without us,” Shyla said in cooing voice.
“And how I’m going to miss Tigger and Piglet.” Dakota sighed, putting her elbow on the table and then placing her chin in her hand.
“Hey, who’s Tigger and who’s Piglet?” Shyla said, then looked down at each hip. “I know I done picked up a little weight, but damn, why I gotta be Piglet? Why can’t a ho be Christopher Columbus?”
“Girl, you mean Christopher Robin,” Trice said and then broke out in laughter.
“Well, whatever, Winnie-the-Pooh’s human buddy in the forest.” Shyla rolled her eyes.
“Ugh, I’m sitting here sick that my BFFs aren’t going to Vegas with me and you all are arguing of what character I’m naming you from a Walt Disney story. Really?” Dakota huffed.
“You’ll be okay,” Trice said, rubbing Dakota’s back. “Just look at the bright side; now you can change the room to a king. You’ll have that king bed all to yourself to curl up in at night and watch television.”
Both Shyla and Trice couldn’t help laughing again. Dakota pushed the women off of her, looked at them each, and said, “Fuck both you bitches. And that was in my black voice.”
Chapter 2
“My baby is going off to Vegas all by herself. I don’t know if I’m ready for that,” Mr. Smith said as he, his wife, and two daughters sat at the dinner table.
“Dad, I’m so not a baby,” Dakota said before taking in a bite of rigatoni, her favorite dish that her mother prepared. “I’m twenty-five. Hello.”
“Yeah, well you’re still my baby.” Mr. Smith looked from one daughter to the next. “Both of you are.”
“Oh, Lord,” said Billie, Dakota’s older sister by two years. “Don’t get him started. It was only just last year I had to stop calling him to let him know when I’d gotten in for the night whenever I go out.”
Mrs. Smith chuckled. “Come on, girls, y’all know how y’all’s father is. He watches too much of that ID Channel mess. Worries himself sick thinking the worst.”
“Can you blame me?” Mr. Smith asked. “This world is crazy. And to have the two most beautiful daughters in the world on top of that. How do you expect a man to sleep at night knowing his daughter is out there in the streets? No, sir. I couldn’t rest until I knew Billie was back in the comfort and safety of her own home.”
Dakota swallowed her food and thought for a minute. “That’s strange, Daddy. I don’t recall you ever having me check in at night with a phone call.”
“That’s because he knows you are right at home in bed watching Love & Hip Hop.” Billie laughed. “You are the last person to be out on the streets getting into something. I can hear your phone call to Daddy now.” Billie put her hand to her ear, pretending it was a phone, and began to mock Dakota. “Dad, I had the most daring night ever. I went to the bathroom during commercial break and I flushed a wipey down the toilet and stood there and waited for the toilet to flood over.” She began clapping in excitement.
Dakota dropped her fork, clearly offended. “So are you trying to say I’m boring?”
“Oh no,” Billie said making a serious face. “I’m sure I could go on the Internet right now and find people other than you who feel that watching paint dry should be a sport.” Billie burst out laughing.
“Honey, stop,” Mrs. Smith ordered. “You’re upsetting your sister.”
And upset Dakota surely was. “For your information, I know how to have fun. I’m not boring,” she snapped. But did she really? Could everyone be wrong? Because, just two days ago at lunch with Shyla and Trice, Dakota had heard basically the same thing from them. Now, her sister? Could it have been true? Was she really the boring girl who did nothing but go to work every day and, for fun, watch television? Dakota never saw herself that way. She’d hit the club scene with Trice and Shyla every now and then. Sure it had to be someone’s birthday or some other special occasion, but she’d go nonetheless. And she seemed to have fun as far as she was concerned. But clearly what was fun to her wasn’t fun to everybody else.
“Your sister is not trying to call you boring,” Mrs. Smith interjected. “Are you, Billie?” She looked to her oldest daughter, shooting her a look that said “you better line up or else.”
Billie took a swig of her apple Snapple. “Absolutely not. I’m not trying to say it at all. I am saying it.” She took another sip.
“Forget you,” Dakota said. “Just because I don’t run the streets does not mean I’m boring.”
“It doesn’t mean you’re the life of the party either,” Billie retorted. “Come on, sis, seriously. List the last five things you did that were really fun and exciting, daring, or even risk-taking?”
Dakota thought for a minute.
“Go ahead. I’m waiting.”
Dakota was still thinking.
“See, jus
t what I thought.” Billie shook her head and took a bite of her mother’s famous rigatoni, a family favorite and recipe of their mother’s grandmother, the girls’ Italian great-grandmother.
“Hold up.” Dakota put her hand up. “Give me a second.”
“Child, if it takes that long to come up with something fun and exciting that you’ve done, then it ain’t even worth mentioning. You’re only twenty-five years old for Christ’s sake. Stuff should be rolling off your tongue. You’re in the prime of fun. After twenty-five, folks tend to hold you more accountable for the stuff you do.” Billie shook her head. “Wasted years.”
Eager to prove her sister wrong, Dakota began rambling off a few things. “Just last week I went to this amazing bachelorette party.”
“Oh, you mean the one you said you excused yourself from and stayed in the bathroom the entire time the strippers were there?” Billie held up an L with her index finger and thumb and made a buzzing sound as if Dakota was on a game show and had gotten the answer wrong.
Dakota thought of something else, quickly. “Well, Trice and Shyla and I just had a girl’s night out. We went to see The Best Man Holiday and had dinner afterward. We talked and laughed so much about that movie that the waitress at the restaurant had to come over and give us a warning for being too loud.”
Billie feigned a tremble. “Oooohh. ‘Lions, tigers, bears, oh my!’ That must have been so scary. Dakota’s waitress warned her for laughing too loud.”
“Screw you!” Dakota snapped. She’d had enough of her smart-alecky sister.
“Hey, watch your mouth,” Mr. Smith said.
“Awww, sookie-sookie.” Billie smiled. “Miss Dakota might have a little fire in her after all. Hmmm, perhaps there is another side to Little Miss Muffet.”
Dakota slammed her fist down on the table. “I am not about to be referred to as one more nursery rhyme character.” A couple days ago she was Little Bo Peep and now she was Little Miss Muffet.
“Young lady, I don’t know what has your feathers all ruffled, but your mother has taken the time to prepare a farewell dinner for you since you’ll be leaving for Vegas in a few days. Is this behavior how you thank her?” He looked from Dakota to Billie. “And you’re not off the hook either. Why you insist on antagonizing your sister, I have no idea. Now you both need to apologize to your mother right now then help with the kitchen.”
Dakota and Billie both had regretful looks on their faces. “Sorry, Mom,” they mumbled simultaneously.
“What? I couldn’t understand either of you,” Mr. Smith said with sternness. “And if I couldn’t understand you, then neither could she.”
“Sorry, Mom,” they both said loud and clearly.
Mrs. Smith nodded her acceptance of their apologies.
Dinner was pretty quiet after that point. After everyone was finished eating, Mr. Smith and Mrs. Smith retreated to the living room to watch some television while Dakota and Billie cleared the table and went to clean up the kitchen. The first few minutes of that were done in silence as well. But after so long, Dakota couldn’t take it anymore. She had to ask her sister what had been on her mind ever since their argument at the dinner table.
“Billie?” Dakota said as she swept the kitchen floor.
“Yeah,” Billie replied, still acting like she had an attitude with Dakota for getting them in trouble with their father; just like old times.
“Am I really boring?”
Billie didn’t hesitate. “Hell, yeah. I know you’re my kid sister and most older siblings don’t like their younger ones to be tagging along, but you were the epitome of why I didn’t want my kid sister tagging along. You’d whine and try to talk me out of anything daring and exciting.”
“That was only to protect you. I didn’t want you getting into any trouble.”
“No one goes through life without ever getting into trouble, Dakota.”
Dakota looked down as if guilty as charged. She honestly couldn’t recall five times she’d gotten in trouble any more than she could recall the last five fun and exciting things she’d done.
“At least no normal person goes through life without ever getting into trouble. Girl, you made me look so bad growing up. Because you did nothing wrong, everything I did do was colossal in Mommy’s and Daddy’s eyes. I mean, you’re worse than some of those Christians I work with. Even some of them cuss, listen to Kendrick Lamar, and go out for drinks with their girls every now and then.”
“I cuss.”
“Yeah, but usually only in a setting and under circumstances to prove to people that you can be edgy if pushed. It’s not natural for you. Cuss words don’t even sound right coming out of your mouth. You don’t really drink when out. And then when you do drink it’s them little cutesy drinks. Girl, get you a rum and Coke, a gin and juice ... something! And you have the smooth listening contemporary station locked in on your car radio dial. I can hardly even stay awake around you.” She shook her head. “To this day, I have no idea how you, Trice, and Shayla have been friends for so long. Now them two ...” Billie’s face lit up. “I can kick it with them all night. They are my kind of girls. I can’t even picture the three of you out at the club. What do you do? Hold their purses while they dance?”
Dakota immediately stopped sweeping and looked at her sister with hurt in her eyes. “Really, Billie?”
“What?” Billie thought for a minute. “Oh, Dakota, please.” She unsympathetically shooed her hand at her younger sister. “I didn’t mean it like that and you know it. So if you are trying to make it out as though I’m trying to say the big girl always sits around and holds purses, that’s not even where I was going with that.”
Dakota had to be honest with herself. She knew that’s not what her sister meant. Even though Dakota was a size eighteen and Billie was a six, Billie’s entire clique was bigger than her, so she knew that Billie was the last person on earth to stereotype big girls.
“Tara is bigger than you and she’s my best friend. And not only is Tara my best friend, but she is the epitome of fun and a good time. You say you are comfortable with the skin you are in and who you are, and I’d like to believe you. But, Dakota, I really think you let the whole weight thing keep you from living. And you’re not even that big.”
Dakota growled. “Ooooh, I hate when people say that to me.” Dakota mocked, “‘You’re not that big.’ Well damn it, I’m bigger than you.”
“So what? A person’s size shouldn’t keep them from living.” She looked her sister up and down, then stopped her eyes. With deep sincerity Billie said, “I love you, sissy. But the fact that you have all these little pet peeves about your weight or race, or whatever, means that sometimes it’s more of an issue for you than it is for the rest of the world. So here.” Billie took the broom out of Dakota’s hands, leaned it against the counter, then took Dakota by the hands and led her into the bathroom.
Billie turned on the light and then positioned Dakota in front of the mirror.
“What?” Dakota shrugged, trying to figure out her sister’s point.
“For once, why don’t you just look at yourself and see something else? Don’t see your size, complexion, or anything else this crazy society tries to make you think is important. You want the rest of the world to see something else, but you yourself won’t even do it, so, baby sister”—Billie turned Dakota to face her—“promise me something.”
Dakota nodded trying to hold back a tear.
“When you go to Vegas, from the minute that plane lands, the world has no mirrors. Never mind what you’ve seen or what you feel other people have seen when they’ve looked at you. It’s all null and void. The only stranger you will meet is yourself. The Dakota who’s standing right here in front of me, leave her on that plane. I repeat: she is not going on this trip with you.”
Dakota was slightly confused. “What do you mean?”
“I mean, dare to get off that plane in Vegas and introduce yourself as someone else, someone you don’t even know. Let her be free. Let her
just be. You don’t know what she looks like, what she’s been through, what she feels like. All you know is that she just is. That’s the same thing you’re always preaching you want other people to see when they look at you. You don’t want people trying to figure out ‘what you are’ or ‘what you are mixed with’ or ‘what size you wear.’ So you don’t do it either. I bet if you can strip yourself of all that, underneath it all is someone who has been dying to have a little fun.” Billie winked.
“But, Billie—”
“No buts, damn it. Just do it. Just live. For once in your life say ‘hello’ to someone new. Something new. Something different.” Billie turned Dakota back to face herself in the mirror. “And say good-bye to her.”
Chapter 3
As Dakota sat on the plane to Vegas she still couldn’t believe the only things she’d taken were the clothes on her back. How did I ever allow my crazy sister to talk me into this? she asked herself as she stared out of the plane’s window.
“What about my underwear?” Dakota had asked Billie who sat on her bed watching her gather the bare minimum necessities to take on the trip.
“Nope.” Billie shook her head. “Get new underwear too. Not the underwear Dakota would wear either. Because remember, Dakota is not going to Vegas with you. No need to buy her a damn thing.”
Dakota stared into her carry-on bag. “What about my bath and body products? My smell goods?”