by Karen Ranney
Craig half turned, staring into the darkness of the woods, an invitation for me to come and stand behind him, close enough that his tail could brush my face. Even in his Were form Craig was a male chauvinist.
He began to lope and I followed him, the gait of four legs instead of two so second nature that I barely noticed the transition. I didn’t like to run as a human, but I adored it as a Furry.
As I followed him along the path to the river, it reminded me of the many times we’d broken protocol and traveled along the San Antonio River, keeping in the shadows so as not to be seen by the tourists.
Craig hadn’t installed any lights along the section of the river. Nothing but moonlight followed us into the thick of the woods. He picked up his pace, running through the brush and over the undergrowth easily. He knew this land. I didn’t. But I put aside my trepidation and followed his lead. Not so much a gesture of trust as it was replaying the past.
We were racing uphill now and over a wooden bridge spanning a narrow section of the river. I could hear the rapids below me, smelled the fish and the moss on the rocks. Someone had lit a fire not far away, the acrid scent of the sulfured matches making me wrinkle my nose. I disliked fire in either of my forms, but I was more equipped to handle it as a Furry. I could run faster. But this wasn’t an out of control blaze. I smelled chocolate and marshmallows. My stomach growled. I really should have had more Fig Newtons.
The brochure I’d read in the room said that this area used to be a children’s camp. As a child, I’d wanted to go to camp one summer but had been refused. Not because my parents didn’t have the money, but because I was Were.
Children couldn’t take any of the drugs to prevent them from changing. We had to transform and we did so in the loving company of our family. Once we hit puberty, however, we were allowed to venture away from our clan, to experience a larger pack.
We didn’t run with a mate that young. That didn’t come until females were seventeen, although the age was younger for males. As children we were gathered up close after the Hunt by our parents and brought home. It had never dawned on me until I was much older that the reason we were so protected was to prevent us from seeing what happened to the adults.
It wasn’t licentiousness as much as simple carnal knowledge. We experienced what it was like to be both Were and human, to revel in the joy of the perfection of our forms.
I followed Craig over the rough ground. I couldn’t see or smell another Were nearby. I didn’t have any doubt what he was doing. He was taking me far away so that I’d be on my own. I would feel vulnerable and maybe even grateful to him for protecting me from the big bad outdoors.
Craig had always underestimated me.
Moonlight followed us, marking the land, illuminating the boulders over which we climbed. At the top of the hill, Craig turned and looked at me. I knew what that meant. In Were parlance, he was giving me permission to come and stand beside him.
Big whoop de do.
Instead of being a good little female Were and going to his side, I went to the edge of the cliff, impressed by the view of the land spread out in front of us. It probably all belonged to Craig and he’d brought me here to show me what he’d accomplished in the past eight years. No doubt I was supposed to be so in awe of him that I’d fall to his feet at dawn and let him mate with me.
Big whoop de do about that, too. Seriously.
Chapter Eleven
Luxury for the most discriminating Were
Craig brushed his tail over my back, but I moved away.
We stood there a little while until he shook himself, a shiver traveling from his nose to the tip of his tail. Turning, he began to run down the hill. I had no choice but to follow him. For tonight, he was my partner.
We ran for hours, stopping once to rest at the river’s edge. Another time he circled the lodge, as if he wanted to check in to make sure everything was functioning as it should be.
I couldn't help but wonder if he passed on some full moon nights and took a pill. I frankly doubted it. He was so much a creature of the moon, just like my father.
I read somewhere that a woman picks a mate like her father. I always discounted the idea, but as I followed Craig over the land, through the woods, and back up to the top of his mountain, I realized that he had a lot in common with Hamish Boyd. He had as much pride, as much self-possession, and the equal of my father’s arrogance.
I think Craig would have been pleased at my comparison, but it wasn’t a compliment. In a lot of ways my father was cold and calculating. He was one of the most self-contained people I’d ever met. He knew exactly what he wanted out of life and how to get it. If you stood in his way, then God help you.
If he hadn’t been born a Boyd, I’m certain my father would have married into one of the first families or done something else drastic to achieve a position of power. Just like Craig.
Dawn was showing over the horizon, the streaks of pink and orange against a midnight blue sky making my heart swell. I’d missed this feeling of being one with the world, one with creation itself.
The transformation process back to human took the same time as human to Were and always made me a little sick to my stomach. When I was a teenager or young adult madly in love with Craig, I never noticed the effect. I’d been infused with so much joy, exhilaration, and pure lust that nothing else mattered.
I closed my eyes when the process began, feeling a dull ache throughout my joints. My stomach rebelled and I took deep, calming breaths. My ears, thankfully, didn’t hurt in the process of reversing themselves.
I didn’t make a sound, unlike Craig who grunted and growled beside me. I think that was a macho thing more than a Were thing.
Finally, it was over, the earth hard against my cheek, more pebbles than loam. I sat up slowly, dizzy and still nauseous.
Craig stood, walked about thirty feet away and lifted a rock. When he returned, he had two robes and a white fluffy blanket in his arms.
“Fake rocks courtesy of Luna Lodge?” I asked.
“Luxury for the most discriminating Were.”
“You’ve thought of everything,” I said as he handed me one of the robes.
Allowing me to dress softened some of my suspicion. The fact that he spread out the blanket only ratcheted it up again.
Evidently, he remembered all those times in the past, while I preferred to be a forward looking woman.
I tightened the belt on the robe and stood looking at him for a moment.
It would be so easy to simply walk across the blanket, stand in front of him, and put my arms around his neck. The robe would part. We would be skin to skin again. Sex wasn’t just an act with Craig; it was an experience. We’d always been like Energizer bunnies, taking advantage of any alone time, any place where there was a modicum of privacy. Not that we would really have cared if someone had walked in on us.
Sex was a necessary and vital part of a Were’s life. It was the impregnation part that was so important. Craig tried. Trust me, he tried.
We didn’t say anything for long moments. I expected him to try to convince me. At the very least, I thought he would kiss me. Maybe I wanted him to, only so that I could turn and walk away.
“Okay,” I said, “I’ve run with you. Have you changed your mind about letting Duncan see Sandy?”
“Have sex with me and I will.”
I allowed myself to smile. I’d halfway anticipated his words. What surprised me was the level of disappointment I felt. He hadn’t changed in the past eight years. His sense of entitlement hadn’t diminished. What he wanted was more important than anything — or anyone — else.
“I’m not going to have sex with you,” I said. I wondered if he could tell I wanted to. My libido was screaming in my ear, tears falling down its face. “That wasn’t part of the deal. You said that if I would run with you, you’d change your mind. So change it.”
To my surprise, he smiled, the sight of him in the dawn light making my heart race again. He was an attracti
ve man in all ways except for character. He wasn’t above using any situation to his advantage.
“Are you still on the pill?” he asked.
“Yes,” I lied.
He nodded, bent to pick up the robe, and put it on.
At least he hadn’t struck me as he almost had eight years ago.
I hadn’t meant for him to know. I’d kept it concealed from everyone. Only my doctor, my pharmacist, and I knew. But he’d gone into my purse and found the dispenser and for an hour he’d shouted at me. Then he commanded me to throw the pills away.
I refused.
He’d been angry, almost angry enough to hit me. The punishment for doing so would have been swift and violent. A female Were had to follow so damn many rules, but she was never to be assaulted. Craig would have been banished from the clan and his family ostracized. Because I was a Boyd, he’d probably have been beaten to a pulp first.
I knew Craig was wildly ambitious. Shall we use the word that the English use? Shagging sounds so much more polite than our F word. Shagging a Boyd princess and getting her preggers would have been an escalator to the top of the pile.
Eight years ago it had already occurred to me that everything that was possible for me after inheriting my grandmother’s fortune would be impossible with Craig. He couldn’t forbid me the money. After all, I was a Boyd. Yet he could make life miserable enough for me that I didn’t finish college just to please him. Or I didn’t go on to vet school because he wouldn’t be happy.
I’d had to choose and looking back I know I made the right choice. I’d walked away from Craig Palmer, from being a normal female Were.
I’d become Torrance Boyd, DVM, and part-time Furry.
There was no way I was going back.
I wished, with all my heart, that his character had changed along with everything else. I wanted him to have grown kinder, less manipulative.
I could never again be that girl who waited for a crumb of praise, who was willing to serve him first, let him be first into a room or through a door, who was content to follow behind him.
My libido, stupid creature, might want to get on that blanket with Craig, but I wasn’t going to do it.
I kept my smile pinned to my face, wishing he’d provided a pair of slippers beneath his magic rock, turned, and began walking down the hill and back to the lodge.
I vowed to call Sandy the minute I could get to my phone. She could just jolly well find a better guy than Duncan to date.
Chapter Twelve
Torrance Taxi at your service
By the time I got into my car, it was seven. Breakfast was being served on the lanai, and it was a sumptuous feast. I didn’t eat, however. I hadn’t paid for my room and I hadn’t been Craig’s sex slave, so it didn’t seem right to eat his food now.
I couldn’t find the valet parking slip for my car, but after I told the young man in the green vest about my Ford, he brought it to me in less than five minutes. No doubt there were lots more Ferraris and other luxury cars in the parking lot.
I got into the car, adjusted the rearview mirror and drove away, glancing back at the lodge a few times.
Maybe I should have had sex with Craig just for the hell of it. My libido was a recalcitrant creature. It obeyed no rules. It just did what felt good. It would have had sex with Craig with absolutely no thought to the consequences.
Sometimes I just had to beat it into submission.
It had been a while for me, although I’m certain it hadn’t been for him. Female Furries weren’t as promiscuous as males. Once we’ve provided an offspring for a male, we don’t have sex with anyone else. Males, however, are free to sprinkle their seed hither and yon.
My problem was that I didn’t feel like being anyone’s hither or yon. Nor would I be happy to accept what my male was doing, like my mother. I didn’t have that much patience or understanding.
In our culture males had freedom while women had bondage. We might as well be wearing burqas. A man would always support you, protect you, and create a home for you. If you wanted more freedom, he might give it to you, but your clan would look at you weird. The women would shun you. The elders would condemn you.
Life for a female was rigid and defined.
I knew that I couldn’t change the Were culture. No one could. Our way of life had existed for thousands of years and would probably exist for thousands more. But I didn’t have to be part of them. I didn’t have to bear a child and be trapped in what essentially was a harem for the rest of my life.
I’d run my last Hunt.
Joey popped his head up and grinned in the rear view mirror.
“I didn’t frighten you, did I?” he asked.
“Who am I, Joey?”
“What do you mean? You’re a Boyd.”
I suppose that was a right answer, given the fact that my father went around proclaiming himself a Boyd at every opportunity. No doubt Austin had picked up the habit.
“What’s a Boyd?”
“What do you mean? A Boyd is one of the first families of Weres.”
I did a mental eye roll.
“The operative word is Were,” I said. “I’m a Were, Joey. I could smell you.”
“So you knew I was here?”
“From the minute I got into the car.”
“Then it’s okay if you take me back to San Antonio?”
“Torrance Taxi at your service.”
He didn’t say anything for a few minutes, which wasn’t like Joey. I kept glancing at him in the rearview mirror. He was looking out the side window.
I frowned at him before concentrating on the road. It was eight lanes to and from San Antonio. Had Craig lobbied for the interstate?
“Torrance?”
I glanced up and met his gaze in the mirror.
“Yeah?”
“Craig’s frozen my accounts. I don’t have any money.”
How the hell had Craig frozen Joey’s accounts so fast? No doubt one of his efficient assistants had simply made the arrangements. It sounded like younger brothers were treated like females.
“Can I stay with you? Would that be okay?”
I didn’t care if he heard my heartfelt sigh.
“No, it’s not okay, but yes, you can stay with me.”
I didn’t agree to let him stay at my house because I was feeling all warm and fuzzy about the Palmers at the moment, but because I knew what it was like to feel alone and without family.
“What are you going to do?” I asked.
“Get a job somewhere,” he said. “I’m a damn good mechanic.”
I looked at him in the rearview mirror. I hadn’t known that.
“I’m the Palmer behind Palmer Auto,” he said.
I hadn’t known that, either.
“Craig owns the company, but I ran it. I was the reason customers kept coming back. He’s going to be out of luck when they learn I’m no longer there.”
“I’m sorry, Joey,” I said, feeling genuine compassion for him. “Why the hell did you go to the OTHER?”
For a moment I wondered if he was going to answer me, but then he sat back, stared at me in the rearview mirror and smiled crookedly
“Ever since he challenged our father, I’ve been pissed,” he said. “Everybody knew my dad wasn’t exactly an alpha Were, but he was a decent man. Craig didn’t have to humiliate him in order to get what he wanted. But he did, and he seemed to take pleasure in it. You should see my dad now. He doesn’t look like himself anymore. He walks around with his shoulders drooping. He never meets anybody’s eyes. He doesn’t even raise his head half the time.”
“Did they promise to make you stronger?” I asked, remembering his comment in Craig’s office.
He nodded.
“I don’t stand a chance like I am,” he said. “Instead, they made me a lapdog.”
“Hardly a lapdog,” I said. “You were a magnificent Alusky.”
“I didn’t change last night,” he said, surprising me. “I wanted to. I went out by the river
and stood there and looked up at the moon and thought about all the times I’d changed, but I couldn’t.” He lay his head back against the headrest and stared upward. “I think I’ve screwed myself up forever.”
Crap on a cracker. Maybe he had.
“Did they tell you that you wouldn’t be a Were anymore?”
“They didn’t,” he said. “Or maybe they did. They gave me this long drawn out explanation of what they were doing and I only caught every other word.”
I frowned at him in the mirror and shook my head.
“What did they give you?”
He shrugged. “Something I drank. I don’t know what was in it.”
“You need to talk to my father.”
For the first time, Joey looked terrified. I couldn’t blame him.
“I can’t do that. He’ll kill me.”
There was every possibility that Hamish Boyd would mete out punishment. After all, Joey had broken a number of Furry laws. Had he thought to escape consequences of his actions? Well, he hadn’t, not exactly. He no longer had a job or access to his money.
“Where do you live?” I asked, waiting for the answer I expected.
“At the lodge,” he said.
I only nodded.
“And your car?”
“It’s there, but it’s owned by Palmer Auto.”
“You could always apologize to Craig,” I said. “Maybe he’d take you back.”
“I could, but it wouldn’t mean anything. He’d let me grovel for a little while before he kicked my ass out the door. He meant what he said, Torrance. Once Craig makes up his mind, there is nothing, and I mean nothing, that will change it.”
I knew that only too well.
He sat back against the seat, leaving me alone with my troubled thoughts.
Chapter Thirteen