“She’s not the only one,” I drawled. What was with all the hand-holding and mysterious glances?
“Astrid, you have no idea what her life was like before she came to us. She lost her mum, too. You know. Just like me.”
“Oh.” I looked after Valerija, into the woods. I’d never spent much time getting to know the runaway when she’d first come to live with us. Frankly, she’d scared me, and with good reason, as she’d turned out to be a Gordian spy. Though Phil had even been her roommate for a while, I never got the sense that they chatted much. Only Cory had been friendly from the start. No wonder Valerija had volunteered for the job of watching her.
“Not exactly like me, though,” Cory went on. “Her mother was … troubled. Alcoholic, other drugs. And when she died, Valerija was left living with her mum’s old boyfriend. He, um, tried to hurt her, and that’s when she ran away.”
“That’s terrible. She never told us.”
“It’s hard for her. Not just the language barrier, but everything. You know how hard it was for her to tell us about Gordian and all last summer. But we’ve grown quite close, so …”
“How close?” I asked.
She pursed her lips. “We have a lot in common.”
Oh yeah. Valerija the druggie runaway and Cory the rich, pampered princess. But maybe who we used to be before we were hunters didn’t matter so much after all.
“We do!” she insisted. “And she’s so much better now. I can’t wait until they see her back at the Cloisters.”
“No more pills?” I asked.
“Hasn’t in months,” Cory stated, her eyes shining with pride. “Says the unicorn magic’s the only high she needs.”
“That’s … nice, I guess.” Was that what being high felt like? Magic? Was that why I craved being near the unicorns?
“I know, odd, isn’t it?” Cory shrugged, and I gave a little chuckle to cover up my own confusion. “But that’s what she says. Which makes me even more scared for her—if she catches whatever this thing I have is.” She leaned in. “Because to tell you the truth, I don’t know if I much mind the other drawbacks. I find I don’t miss hunting.”
“I’m right there with you,” I said.
“And I’m certain I’ll be safe in the Cloisters. We’re going back, both of us. I don’t need to take one of their few hunters away for bodyguard purposes.”
“How magnanimous of you,” I joked.
“It was Val’s idea.” Cory checked for the other girl in the woods, but she was too far within the trees. From the echoed thoughts of the unicorns surrounding her, Valerija seemed to be in seventh heaven. If I closed my eyes, no doubt I could feel her myself, the pinprick node vibrating to me through a string of unicorn consciousnesses.
If I wasn’t careful, Valerija might steal my job.
And then where would Cory be?
“She gets so few interactions with unicorns in London, she’s worried she might lose her powers and not even know it.”
“I think she’d know it,” I said softly to Cory. If I closed my eyes, I’d feel Cory, too. I’d notice everyone, because the unicorns did. They knew each of us here in the woods. They knew the protesters beyond the fence, cooking their stews and washing their clothes and painting their signs. “Right now, though, I’m more worried about you.”
She looked straight into my eyes, and most of what I saw there was concern for me. Me, alone here without the support of other hunters. Alone here with Brandt. Left alone to ponder the ethics of killing unicorns who had never hurt anyone at all.
But she didn’t say any of that. Instead, she said, “Believe it or not, I’ve never been happier.”
I took a deep breath. “Because of Valerija.”
She nodded. “Because of Val, yes.”
Well, then.
“Astrid?” Cory looked apprehensive. She clasped her hands together. “What are you thinking?”
The edge of my mouth quirked up. “That I’m not the only one with a penchant for dating ex-Gordian spies.”
Cory blushed red to the roots of her hair then hugged me. “Thank you.”
“For what?” I asked facetiously.
“You’re the only one who knows. Neil would throw a fit.”
“That’s very close-minded of him.”
“No, silly!” She laughed. She was doing that a lot now. “Because we’re hunters. You know how he feels about people in the Cloisters being together.”
I rolled my eyes. Did I ever.
“And because Val is … well, he can’t stop thinking of her the way she was when she first came to us.”
Well, the drugs were gone, the knives had ended up being an asset, and she’d definitely come out of her shell. “Pretty sure he’ll see that’s no longer the case,” I said. I was pretty sure he’d see everything else, too. Oh, to be a fly on the wall of the Cloisters when they showed up there!
“You’re okay with it, aren’t you, Astrid?” Cory asked. “I know I haven’t been fair to you with Giovanni, but now I realize I was … kind of jealous.” She looked like she might cry.
“Of me?” I asked, stricken.
She wrung her hands. “Um … of Giovanni.”
Valerija appeared again, just in time. “Okay, enough of the unicorns. Let’s have some breakfast.”
I spent the rest of the day in a sort of fog while Isabeau gave Valerija and Cory the grand tour. I trailed behind them on their visits to the château and the labs, and gave short answers to the questions that the three of them aimed at me.
This was too much to process after an all-nighter. Bucephalus, here? Cory and Valerija, here? Cory and Valerija … together? How had I never picked up on the fact that Cory’s disapproval of my boyfriend was tinged with other feelings? We’d shared a room in Italy and I hadn’t picked up on it. It was official: I may be able to read the mind of a unicorn, but when it came to my loved ones, I was completely clueless.
If Cory and Valerija were an item, what did that mean for their magic? Could they be together, for real, or were they trapped under the same restrictions I was? I doubted this was a loophole the Catholic nuns had considered. I wondered if the goddess had.
And if they could be together, how unfair was that? Stupid magic.
The one person we failed to see all day was Brandt, and when the other girls asked about him, Isabeau simply waved her hand and said that Brandt had gone on a trip.
“Already? “ I asked. “But he was up all night.”
“You seem to have plenty of energy, Astrid,” was all Isabeau deigned to reply.
“Well, we’re not particularly interested in him,” Cory said. “But if you have any information about another ex-boyfriend of one of our Llewelyns …”
“You speak, I suppose, of Seth Gavriel,” said Isabeau.
“Anything at all,” Cory said brightly. “Last known location, if you bought him any clothes or vehicles before he left …”
“If you know of any fatal allergies …” Valerija added, and I became acquainted with her smile.
“Alicorn poison,” Isabeau replied, returning Valerija’s smile. “And should the legal avenues for some odd reason fail, I might recommend its application. Believe me, I should like to see that young man brought to justice as much as you. I do not know your friend Philippa, but I know Astrid loves her very much, and so I love her as well. First and foremost, I believe in the law. But I admit that I can also understand your desire for real revenge. Don’t forget I, too, am a Llewelyn.”
Cory leaned over and whispered in my ear, “I take back my earlier impression. I really like this woman.”
The rest of the day passed with the kind of discussions I usually loved. Isabeau turned over all the files she had on Cory and Valerija, and helped them cross-reference the tests they’d undergone at Marten’s lab, trying to discover if anything Cory had experienced might have triggered her condition.
“You were exposed to alicorn venom here,” Isabeau explained, holding up a sheet of paper, “but it was not
the first or last time. I can’t imagine how the effect would change.”
“And this one is just a standard blood drawing,” I said, pointing to another sheet.
The tests on Valerija had been similarly mundane, and since Marten had used her as a guinea pig after he was done with Cory, none of the tests had overlapped.
“I’ll make up copies of these files to take with you,” Isabeau said to Cory. “And if there’s any other information I can get—or tests I can assist you with—let me know. You’re correct; your condition is quite curious.”
Valerija stared at her wide-eyed, as unbelieving as I’d been when I first came here. I beamed. All Jaegers weren’t cut from the same cloth. Then again, Isabeau was really a Llewelyn.
They also talked endlessly about their research—Cory into the history of hunters, Isabeau into the history of their medicine. They shared information and promised to send each other sources that the other might find helpful. I was actually surprised by the extent of familiarity Isabeau had when it came to the topic of hunter genealogy. Perhaps she could help me find my father’s family.
And apparently, Isabeau found a kindred spirit in Cory. “I’ve been reading the work of Hildegard von Bingen,” Cory said over tea. “Are you familiar with her?”
“Am I!” Isabeau exclaimed. “I’ve been trying to get Astrid to read her for weeks.”
“What?” I looked up from the file containing Cory’s medical information. “Oh, right, the German nun. Wasn’t really my thing.”
“Really?” said Cory. “Despite all the ancient medicine?”
“A lot of it was just ridiculous. Unscientific.”
“Quite scientific for the time,” Isabeau argued. “And yes, some of it is nonsense, but a lot of it was based on real observations of herbal remedies. Things that are still used today. You should try her again, Astrid. She believed in the marriage of science and mysticism. There is no truer example of that than you and me.”
I smiled indulgently. “Okay, I’ll try.” If Phil wasn’t in the job already, I’d wager that Isabeau would make an excellent Cloisters donna.
“I was fascinated with the whole idea of viriditas,” Cory said. She turned to me. “Hildegard was obsessed with it. It means God’s power of creation, but also freshness, vitality, life-springing-forth, and all that.”
“All that,” I repeated with a laugh.
“Well, I really liked what she said about how creation can be any kind of life. It can be an herb garden, it can be a baby, it can be a work of art, or a medical discovery—”
“Or an organization of women built from nothing, Cory? “ Valerija interjected.
Cory blushed. “But she was speaking to her fellow nuns, who maybe thought that since they were spending their lives in convents, rather than getting married and having children, that they had nothing to contribute to the world.”
“She was an early feminist,” Isabeau agreed.
“But also,” Cory said, really on a roll, “it was like we nuns, we virgins—whatever—we had extra viriditas. We had more viriditas than anyone else in the world.”
Isabeau straightened. “What an interesting way to view it.” She pulled out another book. “Cornelia, did I show you these? It’s a family tree of the Saint Marie branch living in AlsaceLorraine.”
I didn’t have much of a chance to talk to Cory privately, though I did exchange a few words with Valerija.
“She has told you, yes?” Valerija asked when I took her to show her the alicorn arrowheads. I’d promised her half my stash.
“Yes,” I said. The target was still set up across the lawn. I handed her my bow. “Try them out.”
“I am—” She hesitated. “I am happy, Astrid. And I think, I hope, she is happy, too.” She picked up my practice bow, aimed, and shot. Bull’s-eye. “When I started hunting unicorns, I felt very useful. I felt useful for the first time ever. And I didn’t want to take anything.”
“Because of the magic?” I asked.
“I thought it was,” she admitted, setting down the bow. She didn’t look up. “But then I was sent to be with Cory, and I was useful there, too. And there was no magic.”
She looked up and smiled. “Okay, there was some magic.”
I rolled my eyes and laughed. “But what does it mean? You know, for the rules.”
“I do not know,” said Valerija. “And I do not want to risk anything. It is too dangerous for all of us right now, to not be hunters. Besides,” she said, and touched the arrowheads reverently, “it is still what makes me useful.”
Cory and Valerija stayed into the late afternoon, then headed out, having booked a late flight to Rome. I wished they could stay at least overnight, but Cory was keen to see Neil and cross-reference the family trees Isabeau had shared with the records at the Cloisters. She hoped they could scare up a few more hunters.
I made another plea to Cory to delay assembling a hunting team in response to this alleged karkadann report, and she reluctantly agreed, though she dropped several dark hints that if anyone was killed by the unicorn, it would be on my head.
I resisted reminding her that even if we did send every hunter in the Cloisters after a karkadann, we’d almost certainly have casualties.
“We’ll give Phil and Neil our report,” Cory said. “I think they’ll be pleased with your work here.”
“Give them my love, too,” I said. “And if at all possible, don’t tell Phil about the whole Brandt-nightclub thing.”
“Right.” Cory grinned. “I think there’s enough to talk about without getting into that.”
After they left, I did my rounds at the einhorn enclosure, then went back to my room to study, without much success. There were too many thoughts whirling through my head. The karkadann, Cory and Valerija, the meaning of our magic, Cory’s mysterious illness, my fight with Giovanni … At long last, I gave up and wandered downstairs to find Isabeau in her library, reading.
She looked up from her book as I entered. “I was hoping I’d see you again tonight. I am afraid I may have given you the wrong impression this morning. I think you are very responsible, Astrid. I hope you know that.”
“Thank you,” I said stiffly.
“And I know that things that seem inappropriate are not always so, just as you said. You are not a stupid girl. And I do not expect you to make stupid choices.”
“Brandt is a stupid choice?” Not that I was choosing Brandt.
She gave me an incredulous look. “I know that Brandt is very handsome.” When I said nothing, she went on. “But what of this boyfriend of yours in America?”
“Giovanni,” I said. “He’s great. There’s nothing going on with Brandt and me, you know. He’s my ex. We’re just friends.”
Isabeau closed her book and looked up at me. “Your Giovanni. Does he respect your duties as a unicorn hunter?”
“Of course!” I said. “I wouldn’t be seeing him if that weren’t the case.”
“Hmm.” Isabeau tilted her head to one side. “He sounds like a very nice young man. I’m sure it is not easy for him.”
I looked away. “Easier if he lives on the other side of the ocean.”
“Indeed. But he is devoted to you?”
“I don’t know. I guess he is. He said he would be.”
“It is difficult to have a long-distance boyfriend. Especially when you are both so young. And the fact that he respects your role … He sounds very special, Astrid.”
Way to make me feel even more guilty. “Thank you.”
“Brandt would not,” she stated, and returned to her book.
My mouth dropped open. “I—”
She didn’t look up from her pages as she spoke. “I tell you this not as a warning, Astrid, but as a reminder. If at any time you wish to leave your life as a hunter behind …”
“I don’t.” I said. “I … made a commitment.”
“You are too young to make a commitment that will last you the rest of your life.”
“Isn’t that what I’
m doing, though?” I asked, my voice unable to conceal the bitterness. “If I die, if I’m maimed—won’t that last the rest of my life, too?”
She nodded. “This is true. And you can leave. Many have. But if you do make this decision, do not go to Brandt. Be with your boyfriend, for he must love you. And you, ma petite chère, deserve to be loved.”
I wasn’t sure how to respond to that, so after a reasonable amount of awkward silence, I asked her what she was reading.
“A funny old book of medical cures,” she said. “Not unlike the book of Hildegard’s. As I said earlier, I find it quite amusing that these old medics were wrong as often as they were right.”
“Have things changed much? “ I asked. “It seems that we’re still discovering that things we thought were good for you were bad or vice versa.” Like margarine and butter.
“True, Astrid.” She smiled. “I was just reading the most horrible passage, though. Ironic, given our discussion. I was reading about an old wives’ tale that said a man could cure himself of venereal disease by sleeping with a virgin girl.” She shuddered. “Can you imagine?”
Unfortunately, I could. People could be real sickos. Phil could attest to that.
“The virgin’s purity was thought to be so overwhelming that it would cleanse her lover of his sickness.” Isabeau clucked her tongue. “And yet all it would really do was confer upon her the same suffering.”
I made a face. “That’s so gross. I’m glad people don’t think like that anymore.”
Isabeau looked down at the page. “Indeed. Si près et pourtant si loin.”
So close and yet so far.
I awoke to screams of anguish, and it was several moments after I sat up in bed that I realized the sounds were entirely inside my head. My body flushed with magic—a unicorn in the enclosure was crying out in pain. I hurried to dress and ran out the door.
The moon was obscured beneath a bank of clouds tonight, leaving the woods bathed in darkness. Were it not for the magic, I probably wouldn’t be able to see my knife hand in front of my face. The mind-scream continued as I rushed toward the enclosure and keyed the new combination into the gate locks. After the sabotage, police had come to question the protesters about their involvement, but I didn’t know if they’d made any arrests. And yet, were they to try breaking in again, surely it wouldn’t be a unicorn that ended up in pain? They were trying to save the animals, not hurt them. I remembered the man who’d thrown me his first aid kit after I’d hurt Breaker.
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