“Oh. Wow. I’m so sorry. I do that all the time, too.” Cat fluttered her hands, seemingly unsure of what to do with herself. “I blame Crossfit. Seriously, I don’t know my own strength. I went to help a friend move a couch and I was like, wow, this thing is light as a feather. Then I glanced over and she looked like she was getting a hernia.”
Mala laughed. “I don’t have that problem much.”
Cat eyed her with an appraising gaze. “You should come with me. I think you’d love it.”
“I don’t know… my schedule…”
“Meh. Schedule-schmedule. You make time.” She leaned back on her stool. “But I promise, I won’t try to pressure you into it.”
“What do you do?” Mala asked, the thought of schedules bringing the question to mind. Cat seemed like someone that would be a painter or sculptor or something exotic like that.
“Nurse Practitioner. Surgical.”
“Wow. That’s impressive,” Mala said.
Cat shook her head. “Are you kidding? You’re a doctor.”
“Yeah,” she answered, smiling a bit. “But I don’t have to deal with many surgeons.”
A hearty guffaw came out of Cat’s mouth, and she almost spilled her wine. The laugh was like everything else about the woman. Unpretentious, real, vibrant. If Mala swung that way, she would totally have a crush on Cat at this point.
Maybe she did anyway. Just a bit.
Mala shifted on her seat, taking a sip of her wine. It was excellent, some of the best she’d ever had. Notes of tangerine drifted up through a stronger flavor of berry.
“Do you mind if I ask you an awkward question?” Mala asked.
Cat looked up at that, a wry smirk turning the left side of her mouth up. “You want to know about Jessalyn’s father.”
Mala shrugged. That was exactly what she wanted to know, but now that the topic was out there, she felt like she had overstepped her bounds.
Letting out a sigh, Cat reached out a hand and patted Mala’s leg. “Don’t worry about it. It’s not a secret or anything.” She made a raspberry sound with her lips. “Guy was an animal. Couldn’t keep his dick in his pants.” Glancing up at Mala, Cat made a face. “Sorry.”
“No, no need to apologize.” Mala stared at Cat, seeing the pain that was suddenly there in her eyes. If ever there was proof of the fact that infidelity had nothing to do with the attractiveness… or lack thereof… of the spouse, Cat was it.
“Well,” she said, slapping her thighs and standing up. “That’s a downer. How about a game of strip poker? Or would that be inappropriate?” The mischief in Cat’s eyes kept Mala from taking her seriously, although it didn’t seem out of the realm of what could happen, given the right set of circumstances.
If the hour were late enough, the wine strong enough and the kids asleep, Mala could see Cat challenging her guests to a round of Truth or Dare, if she were being honest about it. And that was just another reason for Mala to like this woman.
She glanced at her watch. 5:30. If she wanted to get home and get ready for her date with Darc, it was probably time to go.
Cat must have caught the look. “You need to get out of here. Get ready for your hot date.” A look of curiosity crossed her face. “Is this a first date?”
“No. We’ve been going out about three months.”
“Three…?” Cat stopped in her tracks. “Whoa. That’s getting serious.”
Mala shrugged, her face heating up. “Yes. I guess it is.”
“So is he good in the sack?”
Mala spit out the sip of wine she had just taken and started to cough. Cat leaned forward and gave her several sharp thumps in between her shoulder blades.
“Sorry. See what I mean about no filter. And the wine doesn’t help any.”
Waving at her while trying to get her breath back, Mala set her glass of wine down. “It’s okay. Really.”
“Three months. Wow. And you two haven’t…?” She moved her hands back and forth in a suggestive manner without getting to graphic.
“Er… no. Not yet.” Mala didn’t normally disclose information like this to anyone, but something about Cat made her feel comfortable. Well, maybe not comfortable, but not wanting to have the earth open up and swallow her whole. Close enough.
“Is he gay?”
Mala was glad she had set down her glass, as that statement would have had her aspirating fine wine once more. Shaking her head, she answered.
“No. It’s a little more complicated than that. He has Asperger’s.”
Cat pursed her lips. “It’s been a while since my abnormal psych class. That’s like Rain Man, right?”
Mala suppressed a smile. “Sort of. Well, actually, that’s a pretty good example. Darc’s a savant, kind of like Dustin Hoffman. But he’s much higher functioning than what’s depicted in the movie.”
“Right,” Cat said, as she seemed to mull this information over. “That explains a lot.” Then, staring right into Mala’s eyes, she said, “So…?”
It was clear what Cat was asking, but Mala wasn’t positive she wanted to go there. On the other hand, it would be great to have someone to talk to about this.
There were so many fears that she had to deal with in terms of her relationship with Darc. And who else was she going to talk to about it? Trey? Not a chance. Janey? Completely inappropriate.
There was Maggie, but how awkward would that be? Discussing intimate details of her romance with the man’s ex wasn’t exactly a model for functional behavior.
But here was a woman whose company Mala very much enjoyed, who had sought out interaction with her, and who had no connection to any of the other people in her life. If there was ever anyone who was perfectly primed to be a confidant, Cat was the one.
And there she was, still looking into Mala’s eyes with a look of expectation written all over her face. It was the perfect arrangement, and who knew?
Maybe Mala would even enjoy it.
She opened her mouth and started to spill.
* * *
“The look in her eye will tell you when she’s ready for her blossom to open,” Trey was saying, staring off into the middle distance, as far as Darc could ascertain.
Never in his life had he been so confused.
Part of the discomfort came from not understanding most of what Trey had said to him. His partner was not one for technical terms or specificity. All of Trey’s instructions had been vague to the point of being completely unhelpful.
“You need to feel when the time is right, and then move in for the kill.”
That sounded more like a set of instructions for a hunt than for intimacy.
In addition, the grey surges inside Darc were getting more and more severe. They were now interfering with the network of color on such a regular basis that the entire logic system seemed to have been undermined.
Instructions, for Darc, had always been processed in a way that was straightforward and formulaic. The way his mind accessed information was perhaps different than most others, but it operated on the principles of math and organization.
The grey wash was randomness incarnate. Where it hit, it washed away any trace of sense and logical progression, leaving nothing behind but smashed and sodden scraps of information, torn and disjointed, unconnected to anything that might give that detail context and meaning.
In other words, the more they talked about sex, the less idea Darc had in terms of what he should actually do. What he desired was a comprehensive and detailed set of instructions. What he was receiving was an emotional and euphemism-filled diatribe on how love made the world turn round.
Which was scientifically unsound, for starters. What made the world turn round was the conservation of angular momentum, or the gravitational pull of the sun, depending on whether one was referring to the orbit of the earth around the sun or the spinning of the earth on its axis. Regardless, love did not seem to factor into the equation at all, from Darc’s standpoint.
“…and then sometimes, she�
�ll want you to do more, but she’s not gonna tell you, so you kind of have to just figure it out… Maybe you should watch some old black and white movies. They might help.”
This was an exercise in futility. Except for the film suggestion, there was not one shred of useable information that Trey had yet imparted. Darc was now less able to make an informed decision about intimacy than he had been an hour ago.
“I need to get ready,” he said, standing up in the middle of another one of Trey’s analogy about flowers. Why flowers should be used so extensively in sexual metaphors, Darc had no idea.
“But wait. I haven’t told you the best part,” Trey said, standing up and following Darc out. “There’s this whole thing you can do that will really drive her crazy.”
“And insanity is something necessary to achieve during coitus?”
“Okay, right there, dude.” Trey smacked himself on the forehead with his open palm. “You can’t say coitus when you’re referring to the act of bumping uglies.”
That sentence made so little sense to Darc that he refrained from responding at all. Understanding the meaning of bumping uglies seemed neither necessary nor enlightening.
“I’m serious, man,” Trey continued. “If you can learn this one thing, you’re guaranteed to have her come back, begging for more.”
“I am not certain that is a desirable outcome. And I now have less than twenty minutes to get ready for my date.”
“C’mon, Darc. How much time do you really need? Slap on some deodorant, put on some clothes and call it good.”
Darc processed that information for a moment. That did not seem to synch well with the other information he had gathered on dating. And hygiene, for that matter.
“I should shower,” he replied.
“No, no, no. See, that’s where most guys go wrong. Your natural scent has got pheromones in it. Stuff that’s naturally meant to attract members of the opposite sex.”
The science of Trey’s statement was, of course, wildly inaccurate. The studies of pheromone reactions in humans had been largely inconclusive.
However, if there were even the smallest chance that there was some benefit to having his own masculine scent affect Mala, it seemed a good plan to use it. This was an area in which Darc was woefully inadequate. Any advantage was worth some risk. The risk here being that he might not smell as clean as might be desired.
There was little more he could do. Time had now run out, and his date with Mala loomed in front of the gleaming pathways of color that were tracing the route he must take. Tremors danced along the lines of light, indicators of the chaos and trauma introduced into the system by the waves of grey.
But this was necessary.
Without continued dating, Darc would no longer be able to interact with Mala on a more intimate level. In addition to that, his close ties with Janey would be effectively severed, leaving him without the small girl’s companionship.
That could never happen.
Darc seized control of the streams of light, holding them still to calm the trembling. This evening would remain under his conscious control and observant diligence. Mala would be made to feel special.
Your future depends upon it, whispered the vast sea of grey within.
Darc chose to ignore the sounds.
CHAPTER 10
By the time Trey and his partner got back to Darc’s apartment, the big guy didn’t have much time to get ready. Maybe he’d been right about leaving a bit earlier.
But there had been so much information that Trey had needed to impart to him. An hour and half? To tell Darc everything he knew about the art of love would take days. Weeks. Months maybe.
He’d done the best he could for his partner. Now it was up to Darc to take the ball to the goal line.
Thinking that one through, Trey was pretty sure this date was going to be a disaster. As they walked down the hall towards Darc’s place, Trey turned his head and muttered to his partner.
“Just as a warning. Since Maggie’s been in the family way, she can get a little... um, how should I say this? Cranky. Yeah. Cranky, if she doesn’t get enough to eat.”
“I have little.”
That was Darc, ladies and gentlemen. A man of few words.
This was something Trey should have thought through before he came back home. But once he’d found out about Darc’s dating dilemma, pretty much everything else had gone out of his head.
Okay, new plan. He would have to take Maggie out to eat. She loved going out to eat, right? No problem. They’d go out to some Italian place with loads of carbs, order the entire menu and stagger back home happy. Grab some snacks along the way for sometime in the middle of the night.
Problem solved.
As soon as Darc opened the door, Trey knew things were going to be bad. Maggie’s hair was sticking out at all angles, she was wearing sweatpants and a wife-beater that didn’t quite cover her expanding stomach, and she had a near-empty bag of Cheetos Puffs sitting on her chest. Her fingers were orange, and she had a slightly crazed look in her eye.
Plus, she was reading 50 Shades of Grey.
These were not good signs.
“Sweetie?” Trey said as he entered the room with caution. “How’re you doing?”
Maggie lifted her head, the movement slow and smooth. Her eyes were neutral, but Trey could see a fire burning back behind them. This was her scary face. The one that no one else could decipher, but the one that Trey knew meant trouble.
Darc took one look at her, and turned to Trey. “You are in trouble.” He then disappeared into his room.
Okay, so maybe Darc could decipher it, too.
“Hey, sweetie,” Maggie answered, as if Darc hadn’t said anything. As if he hadn’t been there at all, actually. “How was your day?”
“Um. Good. You know, good-ish. Listen,” Trey said, trying to manage what could be a tsunami here in a second. “I know I’m late coming home--”
“No, late is ten or fifteen minutes. This? This is something else entirely.”
Trey glanced at the wall clock. It read ten minutes to seven.
Under normal circumstances, Maggie understood that Trey’s job forced him to work odd hours. Hell, she’d been married to Darc, so she understood even stranger timeframes than most.
But there was something that Trey had discovered about his girlfriend. She somehow always knew when he was late because of work, and when it was something else. And this had been something else.
Fortunately, there might be a saving grace here. A silver lining to the green-cast tornado clouds that were gathering.
“Okay, I know it was late, but here’s the deal…” He paused for effect, caught a glance at Maggie’s face and thought better. “Darc’s going on a date tonight.”
There was no change in Maggie’s expression. If anything, the flames behind her eyes got a bit hotter.
And then Trey realized that maybe he hadn’t given her enough information. She was missing the clue that might turn this whole evening around.
“Darc’s been dating Mala for three months and they’re going out tonight.”
Still nothing.
“Um... Janey’s going over to a friend’s house for a sleepover?”
For a long beat, there was still no discernable difference in the stare she was directing at him. Then, there was a flicker of something. Understanding? Softness? Maybe just a hint of something like sadness?
“Oh,” she said. “I get it now.”
Just at that point, Darc came back out of his room. He was dressed impeccably, which was something that he somehow always managed to do. Perhaps it was the fact that there was a science to it. Proportions and lines and whatnot.
But Trey’s partner didn’t stop to be admired. He didn’t even make eye contact as he headed out the door. One moment he was there, the next he wasn’t.
The door slammed behind him.
Trey looked at Maggie. Maggie looked back at Trey. Then they both burst out laughing at the same time. When the
ir laughter subsided, Maggie gave Trey another long, hard look.
“Fine,” she said finally, and Trey’s blood pressure plummeted to the point that he almost passed out. “Helping Darc’s a pretty good reason.” She started to go back to her book, when she seemed to think of something. “Wait a minute.”
“Yes?” Trey asked, his heart rate climbing again.
“How were you helping him?”
Trey shrugged. “You know. We were just talking.”
“About…?”
Clearing his throat, Trey lifted his eyebrows. “You know… sex. And stuff.”
“Oh no,” Maggie said, lifting her hand up to her mouth.
“What?”
“You were teaching Darc about sex?”
Well, that was just insulting. “Yes. I was, as a matter of fact. And I think I was pretty helpful, for the fact that I only had an hour and a half.”
Maggie held up a hand. “So not only were you trying to teach him about sex, you were trying to do it fast?” She got a look on her face that Trey could only describe as horrified. This was not the reaction that he would’ve expected.
“This is not good. This is not good at all.”
“Um, okay,” Trey said, starting to feel pretty peeved. “What’s the problem?”
But Maggie just shook her head sadly.
Fantabulous. Not only did she think that him teaching Darc something was ridiculous, but apparently Trey wasn’t nearly as good at things as he had maybe thought.
Tonight was turning out to be a rip-snorting good time.
* * *
Darc stared across the table at Mala. They were seated at one of the few places to sit that were available at the mostly take-out place. The table was outside, which in Seattle was always a risk, but tonight’s forecast did not call for rain. And the heat lamps surrounding them staved off the night’s chill.
Mala’s symmetrical features, that the pathways of light had always enjoyed tracing with their delicate light, were framed within her hair that she had worn down. It created an effect that Darc found compelling, although the reaction came from the confusing grey areas inside. There was no logical basis for the added attraction, but he could not deny that it was present.
The 2nd Cycle of the Darc Murders Omnibus (the acclaimed series from #1 Police Procedural and Hard Boiled authors Carolyn McCray and Ben Hopkin) Page 20