Maybe it was the universe’s way of telling her she was getting way too wrapped up in Cole, allowing herself to think of happily-ever-after when he just wanted one day at a time. She took a moment to inhale a deep breath and reminded herself that despite the evening she had planned, she had to keep up the mental wall separating what she and Cole had from thoughts of forever. No matter how nice he was, how much fun they had together, no matter even how much he might like her, she knew his heart. It had been trounced upon twice, and she understood his firm commitment to not getting serious again.
She tossed the hand towel onto the countertop and headed for the door. But when she opened it, her smile quickly faded. Instead of the man who’d captured her heart, it was her mother.
“Mom. What are you doing here?” Her mother rarely came to the farm. She either found Devon in town or summoned her to the ranch.
“We need to talk.”
She couldn’t very well shut the door in her mother’s face, and the sooner she let her mother say whatever she’d come here to say, the sooner she’d leave. Devon opened the door wider and motioned for her mom to come inside.
“Come into the kitchen. I’ve got things cooking.”
Devon went straight to the stove and checked the progress of the oven-barbecued chicken. Her mouth watered at the sight of it.
“Are you having friends over?”
“Just Cole.”
Devon got the impression her mother tried to hide her sigh at the mention of his name, but she wasn’t successful.
“If this is another attempt to get me to go out with some man you’ve chosen for me, you can save your breath.”
“You act as if I’m trying to ruin your life. I have introduced you to some of the most eligible bachelors in the state, and you turn up your nose at them.”
“I’ve done no such thing. But I’m not going to pretend they’re the kind of men I like when they’re not.”
“How can you know when you barely even speak to them?”
Devon braced her hands on the kitchen island and stared at her mother. “Because I know the type. They’re suit-wearing, corporate types. Perhaps they’re perfectly nice guys, but that’s not what I want.”
“No, you want to throw your life away on someone who’s probably just trying to get his hands on your family’s money. Well, I can tell you one thing, he won’t get one red cent.”
Devon stared at her mom, stunned into momentary silence. And then the anger rose up to the surface like a geyser blowing. “I cannot believe you just said something so hateful. You don’t even really know Cole.”
“What was it you said? I know the type.”
“You mean someone who is hardworking and has no interest in marrying into money.”
“So you don’t have a ring yet? I’ll admit he’s working slower than I anticipated.”
“There’s not going to be any ring, okay?” Devon’s voice rose with the growing anger. “Our relationship is totally casual. And you know what, it didn’t even start out as that. In the beginning, we faked it just so you’d leave me alone.”
Her mother jerked as if she’d been slapped. “What do you mean?”
“I was sick and tired of you trying to foist all these ‘suitable’ men on me, and evidently it showed. Cole swooped in to save me, and we became friends. We pretended to date.”
Color rose in her mother’s cheeks. “But now you’re really dating? Maybe he saw what he could have if he made things real.”
“Oh, my God! You’re not listening to me. Cole doesn’t have any interest in getting married. He’s tried it twice and neither time worked out.”
“Why would you be with someone with whom you have no future?”
“Because he makes me happier than I’ve ever been.”
“But it won’t last. You will get hurt.”
“Probably.”
The look on her mother’s face changed. If Devon didn’t doubt her own eyesight, she’d swear it softened the tiniest bit.
“Do you love him?”
“Yes.” She didn’t hesitate, tired of holding the truth inside.
“Devon, I know you’re a smart girl. Why would you do this to yourself?”
Devon fought the tears that threatened. “I’d rather be happy with him for a while than to never be happy at all.”
Movement beyond her mother drew Devon’s attention just as the words left her mouth. Shock hit her hard as she saw Cole, realized he’d heard her. As she realized that she’d probably just ended not only their special night but their relationship, she couldn’t hold back the tears anymore. Two fat drops leaked out of her eyes and raced down her cheeks to her chin.
Devon tried to read the expression on Cole’s face through her tears. Anger. At her or her mother? And though he might not even be conscious of it, she saw his instinct to turn and run. She tried to smile, to wordlessly tell him that it was okay to do just that, but she simply couldn’t manage it. Her heart hurt too much.
Her mother realized he was there and turned toward him and pointed at Devon. “You owe my daughter an apology for breaking her heart.”
“Mom!” Devon wanted to shake her mother until she knocked loose some sense, some speck of kindness and understanding.
She expected Cole to turn around and leave. Instead, he stepped more fully into the kitchen and leveled a fierce gaze at her mother.
“No, it’s you who owe her an apology. A whole boatload of apologies for not seeing what a kind, generous, brilliant and beautiful woman Devon is.”
“How dare you—”
“I dare because it’s about damn time someone stands up to you on Devon’s behalf. She shouldn’t have to constantly tell you that she’s entitled to live her life the way she wants to without your meddling.”
“I think I know more about what’s good for my daughter than you do.”
“I don’t know why you don’t like me, and I frankly couldn’t give a rat’s ass. But I will not let you hurt Devon anymore. She’s a grown woman, and you need to accept her as she is or you’re going to lose her for good.”
“Is that a threat?”
He shook his head. “No. It’s what she’s been telling you for a long time that you’ve not been hearing.”
Devon couldn’t believe what she was witnessing. If she didn’t already love Cole, the way he was defending her would have sealed the deal. He was worth more than all the men her mother had tried to pair her with put together. But a part of her also wished he wasn’t rushing to her defense. He had no idea how much harder it was going to be for her to get over losing him because of it.
“I’m her mother. It’s my job to protect her, watch out for her best interests.”
“No, you’re watching out for your best interests. You’re more concerned with your status than your daughter’s happiness.”
“Well, evidently you’re not too concerned about her happiness, either. Just using her for a fling.”
“She’s not just a fling,” he said, his voice rising in volume and intensity.
When he slowly turned his head toward Devon, her breath caught. She knew it had to be wishful thinking magnified by the current emotions running high, but she would almost swear she saw her feelings for him reflected back at her.
“I love her.”
Devon’s world spun. She simply could not have heard him correctly. No, he was back to acting, putting on a really believable show for her mother. While she appreciated it, she wanted to tell him to stop. This was too far for her heart to handle. She couldn’t hear him proclaim his love when he didn’t mean it.
“Just not enough to make an honest, respectable woman out of her.”
Honest and respectable? What century was her mother living in?
“You’re wrong again,” he said, still looking
at Devon so intently that her legs were beginning to literally shake. “If she’ll have me, I would love to spend the rest of my life with her.” He finally broke eye contact, allowing Devon to catch her breath.
Cole stared at her mother. “And you can keep your money. I don’t want a dime of it. Your daughter is worth more than any amount of money or what it can buy.”
“Words are cheap.”
“You can take mine to the bank.”
Before her mother could say anything else, Devon butted in. “Get out.”
Her mom glanced at her, then back at Cole. “You heard her.”
“I’m talking to you,” Devon said.
The expression on her mother’s face when she looked back at Devon was a tangle of disbelief and anger. “What?”
“Get...out!”
Devon prepared herself for her mother’s next volley, but her mom surprised her by making a disgusted sound and stalking away. Devon was mad enough to slam every door in the house, but her mother closed the door normally behind her, conscious of appearances even while furious.
Devon had never really understood the phrase about silence being deafening until that moment. Before she could collapse, she steadied herself against the island. As her brain cranked away to try to understand how her life had gotten to this holy mess of a point, she shut off the oven. No point in adding burned chicken to the pile of awful.
“Are you okay?” Cole asked as he stepped up to the opposite side of the island.
She didn’t meet his gaze. Instead she stared at her hands and wished she could transport herself anywhere but here. A nice deserted island in the South Pacific sounded good right about now. Or the ability to travel back in time so she could tell herself not to get involved with Cole.
“I’ve been better.”
Cole rounded the island and turned her to face him. Only she couldn’t force herself to meet his gaze. And she didn’t have the strength to resist when he pulled her into his arms. Instead, she wrapped her arms around him and flattened her hands against the muscles in his back. When he dropped a kiss atop her head, she closed her eyes to prevent fresh tears from falling. She couldn’t let him know how much she wished the words he’d spoken about loving her were true. As she stood there, knowing their time together was limited, she’d swear she could feel brittle pieces of her heart already shattering.
The longer they stood there, Cole offering her comfort, the more her anger grew. She’d wanted this night to be perfect. Determined to salvage it, especially since it was likely her last opportunity to be with Cole, she pulled away enough to meet his gaze for a moment before kissing him. She poured every last drop of her love for him into the kiss.
In less than the span of a heartbeat, it was as if a fire had been lit between them. Cole framed her face with his strong hands and took the kiss even deeper. She moaned into his mouth, and she’d swear to a room full of judges that she felt an animal-like growl rise up within him, something primal that ignited a thousand flames of desire within her.
She’d planned to end the evening in bed with him. Well, she was moving up the timetable. While continuing to kiss him, she fumbled with the buttons on his shirt. He didn’t question her, instead running his hands up her back and unclasping her bra. He lifted his mouth from hers only long enough to remove her shirt and bra, tossing them across the room to land out of sight. At the moment she didn’t care if she ever saw them again. When Cole’s mouth captured her breast, she decided being naked with this man was the only way to live life.
Needing to feel all of Cole, she backed her way to her bedroom, snatching quick breaths between their kisses.
His mind must have been traveling the same track as hers because moments after they arrived in her room, they were both naked and collapsing into bed. And moments after that, Cole was sliding into her and taking her with a frenzied pace she found she really liked. She responded in kind, digging her fingers into his shoulders as they raced headlong toward world-spinning release.
On the heels of her own peak, she watched as Cole strained above her, the muscles in his neck, chest and arms so taut she didn’t think she’d ever seen anything so sexy. As he made one final thrust, she held on to him as if he might disappear if she didn’t.
Cole collapsed beside her, his head coming to rest in the crook of her neck. “If I were to die right now, I’d die a happy man.”
Why did he have to say things like that when she was trying to prepare herself for losing him? But he did, and she foolishly hung on to those words as if they might mean what she really wanted them to. She needed to bring up what he’d told her mother, but she just couldn’t. It was selfish, but she wasn’t ready to take that step. Not yet.
“Well, you can’t die until you help me eat some of the food I made.”
As if on cue, his stomach grumbled.
Devon laughed, surprised she was able to so soon after the ugly scene with her mother. To avoid having Cole possibly bring it up again, she slipped from the bed and grabbed her short cotton robe from the chair in the corner.
“You know, there’s no law against eating naked,” Cole said from where he stretched out on the bed, putting his strong arms and sculpted chest on drool-inducing display.
Not trusting herself to say anything remotely coherent, she just huffed a quick laugh and walked from the room. She busied herself assembling the food she’d had time to make before her mother and then Cole had shown up. The chicken was still warm in the oven, and she pulled out the potato salad from the fridge.
She looked up at the sound of Cole’s footsteps, half expecting him to walk into the kitchen stark naked. Not that she’d mind. He’d pulled on his jeans but left his feet and chest bare, as if he thought that even the jeans wouldn’t be on for long.
Devon’s cheeks heated in a flash, so she turned to retrieve a couple of glasses from the cabinet. “I had planned to make several more things, but I was interrupted. I did manage to get the cake baked, though.”
She braced herself to dive into the inevitable conversation about her mother, her own admission and what Cole had said to her mom. Instead, he stared at the food she’d laid out.
“Were you planning for a dozen people? Because I think we have plenty here.”
She tossed a cold roll at him, which he caught, then gave her a wicked grin before taking a bite.
“Those would be better warmed up with some butter,” she said.
“They’re fine like this. I somehow worked up an appetite.”
She loved it when he was flirty and teasing. She’d miss that, along with so many other things about him.
“I can’t imagine how.”
He moved so quickly around the end of the island toward her that she didn’t have time to do anything but squeal, take a couple of awkward steps back and drop two rolls in the floor.
“Look what you made me do.”
He pulled her into his arms and grinned wide. “It was worth it.”
Cole captured her mouth in another of those kisses that turned her brain to pudding and caused her body temperature to go full-on rocket ignition. She gripped his biceps, partly to steady herself but mainly because she couldn’t not touch him. It was as if she’d been searching for a missing piece of herself her entire life and hadn’t realized it until Cole had become a part of her world. Her heart screamed for her to ask him to reconsider his view on long-term relationships, to convince him that she was different and worth the risk.
All thought other than the intoxicating feel of his body pressed close to hers fled her brain. She ran her hands over his arms and shoulders, letting her fingers find their way up through his hair. There was no way she’d ever get enough of him.
Time passed as they explored each other, but she couldn’t say how much. Eventually, however, hunger of the traditional variety asserted itself. They filled the
ir plates and took them out to her front porch to eat while inhaling the fragrance of the surrounding countryside.
“This is nice,” Cole said as he stared out through the deepening night. “I understand why you like it here.”
“For a long time, I couldn’t explain why exactly this place spoke to me, why it felt so right. But when I came back after visiting my parents one time, it hit me like a lightning bolt. It’s the polar opposite of my parents’ ranch.”
“There’s no pretense. What you see is what you get. It’s honest, like you.”
His words touched something deep inside her heart, but then she felt like a liar. She wasn’t telling him the truth, not about how she really felt, how she didn’t want to let him go. She was even avoiding bringing up his declaration of love because she feared it had been as false as their initial dates.
Devon didn’t know if Cole could tell she was struggling with something or if the timing was coincidence, but he entwined his hand with hers. He didn’t say anything, and neither did she. And despite how unsure she was about just about everything but how she felt about him, it was nice to sit quietly with him and let the rhythm and beauty of the night envelop them. When he was gone, she would remember every moment they’d spent together. But it would be this one in particular that she would hold dearest because she didn’t think she’d ever felt closer to anyone than she did to Cole right now. She was pretty sure she never would again.
Chapter Fifteen
Devon leaned on her elbow, propping her head on her upturned hand, and watched Cole sleep. She resisted the powerful urge to run her fingers across his stubble-covered cheek because she didn’t want to wake him. But the self-control it took to not touch him, to once again curl into his arms and lose herself in his kisses, his hands roaming her body, was substantial. Instead, she watched his slow, even breaths in and out. She smiled at how he’d certainly fallen into a deep sleep after their second round of lovemaking.
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