by T. I. Lowe
Her heart weighed heavily throughout that holiday season. Although the town merrily twinkled each night, the only thing twinkling in Leah’s apartment were the endless tears shed each night. Leah was haunted by the never-ending, tormenting thoughts of how different this time could have been.
Her belly should have been protruding impressively out with the ripening of her healthy baby, but instead it was sadly deflated. She should have been tucking presents under her tree for her soon-to-be-born daughter. She would have had the nursery ready by now and it stocked full of diapers, wipes, and frilly outfits….if only she had lived in a different world than the one she had unbearably gotten stuck in. She should have been gazing at a Christmas tree as she rocked, happily placing her hand on her belly to feel her baby bumping and kicking. Instead, Leah was wrapped in a tight ball in withering despair, in a dark, lonely bed with her head on a damp pillow.
On Christmas Eve, the town’s youth, children and teens alike, participated in the traditional Christmas Carol Hayride. Piled into the back of a long trailer filled with hay bales, the youth were pulled by a decorated antique red Farmall tractor, driven by none other than Crowley Mason.
Lulu had roped a very unwilling Leah into participating in the event. Lulu always hosted refreshments, which included every cookie you could imagine and rich hot chocolate, in the riverside park for the carolers. Both women had spent the better part of the day baking cookies and prepping large silver urns full of Lulu’s secret recipe for hot chocolate, which she gladly shared with Leah. Lulu also did her best in making the cookie recipes as healthy as possible, but she admitted to Leah that there was just so much you could do.
“It’s the holidays, so some splurging won’t hurt,” Lulu said as she arranged the treats on beautiful silver platters.
They loaded two large urns on top of a rolling cart and placed the platters underneath. Then they pushed it over to the park, having to make two trips for all of the cookies and urns, to where they had earlier draped foldout tables with patchwork tablecloths.
The two ladies tied on their decorative aprons and manned their stations. Leah gladly volunteered to serve the hot chocolate. She was sick of looking at cookies. Leah had splurged a bit too much when Lulu wasn’t looking and had earned herself a minor bellyache. Lulu handed her a small basket of Christmas-themed ceramic coffee mugs to place on the hot chocolate table.
“We may need more mugs than this, don’t you think?” Leah looked down at the mere half-dozen mugs.
“Oh… No dear. Everyone knows to bring their own. These are just in case someone forgets theirs.”
Leah heard the tractor and carolers singing in the distance for a good five minutes before spotting them. As the tractor pulling the group rounded the corner, Leah caught herself before laughing out loud at the sight of Crowley. Perched atop the tractor, he was wearing a frumpy knit beanie cap and a matching bulky scarf that was knit in a variety of Christmas colors. Boy, someone sure is in the holiday spirit. Seeing that he had replaced his flip-flops for a pair of well-worn work boots, she thought he would make a fitting model for country boy Christmas attire.
The youth eagerly filed out the back of the trailer and headed to the cookie table. They stood in front of the two ladies and serenaded them with “We Wish You a Merry Christmas.” As they sang sweetly, Leah noticed people coming out from everywhere, coffee mugs in hand. So much for a short and sweet event. She plastered a friendly smile on her face and filled mugs for the next hour.
Crowley made his way up to the hot chocolate. Leah had just set out the third urn.
“Merry Christmas, Leah,” he said as he handed over an enormous travel mug. He was determined to not behave rudely as he did back at Thanksgiving.
“Merry Christmas to you too. You wouldn’t happen to like hot chocolate, would you?” She grinned as she held up his mug.
“It’s one of the very few times of the year that Lulu lets this town enjoy sugar, so I like to take full advantage of that,” Crowley said. He took several sips from his mug and then had Leah top it off. He leaned over the table and whispered, “I even sneak into the café after I return the tractor every Christmas Eve and swipe the leftover cookies. So if you hear someone later on tonight downstairs, it ain’t Santa.”
As Leah handed him the mug for the second time, her eyes focused on the slouchy cap and scarf. “Nice getup you’re wearing tonight.”
A huge grin lit up Crowley’s face as he mockingly straightened his cap. “Yeah? I was hoping you’d like it.” A group of teenage boys called for Crowley to join them over at the cookies. He held up his mug to Leah and said, “Thank you,” before sauntering over to the cookies.
Leah couldn’t stop watching him walk away. His broad shoulders seemed so relaxed as he stood over the crowd.
“Hmm…Yum, yum. Looks like pure sexy walking,” Ana whispered at Leah’s side as she admired the view. Leah blushed at being caught and turned to offer Ana some hot chocolate.
“Dang, Ana. Talk about sexy.” Leah stepped back to take in Ana’s Christmas attire. Her shimmering white bodice, which pushed her best assets forward, peeked out from underneath a fitted red jacket that had a white fur collar and cuffs. Dark designer skinny jeans and black knee-length stiletto boots rounded out the outfit. Ana’s ensemble was completed with a silver sequined headband shimmering in her wavy brunette locks. Leah glanced down at her oversized black tunic that bulked out around the holiday apron and tugged at it self-consciously. She looked back over to Ana and thought that even the girl’s makeup was flawless.
“You like it?” Ana asked as she did a little twirl.
Leah giggled. “You are so girly.”
“I have a Christmas party to attend at my parents’ beach house,” she said.
“Now you’re making me even more jealous.”
“Sorry honey, but I’m going to have to make you a little more jealous.” Ana laughed and pulled out a small bundle of mistletoe. “Really, I don’t mean to…maybe you should just look away.” She laughed some more, with Leah joining in.
Leah watched as Ana sashayed over to the group that Crowley was towering over and playfully demanded kisses from all of the young boys. She accepted each kiss on her cheek and planted one on theirs in return. It didn’t slip Leah’s attention that Ana deliberately left Crowley for last. Leah was jealous of how confident and sure Ana always seemed to be about herself.
Leah watched as Crowley bent to place a kiss on Ana’s cheek, but she strategically turned her head at the right moment, and their lips locked. The crowd responded with whoops and hollers. Ana delivered a slow, dramatic kiss to Crowley. The males stared at Ana’s backside as she strutted away towards her car. Leah could hear the group hound Crowley about Ana, and his good-natured attempts to laugh it off.
The festivities were torturous. The people in Rivertown just seemed too darn happy for Leah’s taste. Ten abusive years with Brent had left her feeling bitter and lonely, and all the cheer left her feeling like an outsider. Her loneliness intensified as she stood in the midst of the park that night. During the event, the thought that maybe it was time to move on nagged at her.
Leah was relieved when the kids started climbing back into the trailer. She insisted that Lulu should finish out the hayride with the carolers, while she cleaned up. Lulu hesitated, but Leah could tell the older lady really wanted to go.
“Go ahead, Lulu. Let me clean up as a Christmas gift to you,” Leah said.
“Only if you’re sure…” Lulu lit up like a Christmas tree as a teenage boy helped her climb into the back of the trailer, with the youth cheering. The singing started before the tractor was even cranked.
Crowley caught the bleak look on Leah’s face as she turned to begin cleaning. He had noticed a deeper sadness had swept over her within the past week. The holidays didn’t seem to be easy for her.
He stood on top of the tractor and let out an earsplitting whistle to get the crowd’s attention. “Beings that we have ourselves a special guest that mos
t of you know has never had the opportunity of accompanying us on our hayride…” Crowley paused and cut his eyes over to Leah, who was cleaning but listening. “Thanks to Miss Leah Allen...” He paused again as the crowd applauded. “I do believe we need to welcome Miss Lulu with a special song.” Crowley cleared his throat dramatically and began belting out, “Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer.” After the roars of laughter ebbed, the crowd joined in with the silliest rendition of the song. Crowley smiled when he saw Leah holding her side from laughing so hard.
Satisfied with himself, Crowley hopped down into the seat, tipped his cap mockingly towards Leah, and drove the carolers off into the night.
It took Leah a little over an hour to move everything back inside and wash out the empty urns. She placed the few leftover cookies into a plastic container and set them on the counter, with a note saying Merry Christmas, for Crowley to pick up later. After she locked up, she headed upstairs, contemplating on whether she was ready to pack up.
She opened her apartment door and suddenly stopped. In the living room corner stood a Christmas tree, fully decorated, that lit up the entire space and filled the space with an inviting scent of spicy forest. Presents were tucked underneath. She made her way over slowly and stood before the beautiful tree as tears spilled down her cheeks.
“My very own Christmas tree,” she whispered as she admired the tree. Hundreds of multicolored lights twinkled amid Christmas ornaments as the tree shimmered with a light layer of silver tinsel. It was perfect. Leah had never had a tree to call her own. The orphanages where she was raised would have artificial trees put out on display. Usually some organization would donate a tree, adorned with large plaques announcing their sponsor. Some of the foster homes she had briefly lived in wouldn’t even bother putting one up, claiming Christmas wasn’t part of their culture. Leah had been troubled that the child service system would even allow people, who didn’t celebrate the holiday that all children held so dear, to be foster parents. Of course, Brent refused to have such tackiness, as he put it, cluttering up his personal space.
Leah wondered who had pulled off sneaking a tree and presents into her apartment without her knowing about it. She slowly knelt in front of the tree and studied the mystery gifts underneath. Each tag stated it was from Santa Claus. Curiosity finally won out, so she picked up the smallest one, wrapped in lime green wrapping with a hot pink bow on top, and carefully unwrapped it. To her delight, the gift was two beautiful fabric headbands, one black with white swirls, and the other was turquoise. “Thank you, Ana,” Leah whispered as she slid the black and white swirly one in her hair. She then pulled a rectangular package out and peeled the candy cane–striped wrapping away to reveal the first three books from the Stephanie Plum series. Leah smiled and whispered a thank you to Nick from the bookstore. He was a jolly old man who resembled Santa a bit. The next gift was a green gingham gift bag. She pulled it into her lap and peered inside. To her joy, it held her very own Lulu apron. She took off her Christmas apron and replaced it with the whimsical black-and-white floral patterned apron, complete with a hot pink cursive L embroidered on one of the pockets. Black, white, and hot pink tulle ruffles adorned the bottom, resembling a tutu. Leah adored it. She did a girly twirl so she could admire the apron fully.
The gift wrap on the last present depicted swimming fish wearing Santa hats. The silly paper and the gift inside easily gave away the giver. It was a floppy knitted beanie hat and scarf that was identical to the ones worn by Crowley earlier. Laughing out loud, Leah placed the cap on her head and wrapped the scarf loosely around her neck.
She stood up and scooted the rocking chair over to the tree. She sat down to rock and to enjoy her gifts in the glow of the luminous Christmas tree lights. The gifts were the most special she had ever received, for they were from the heart.
After rocking for a while Leah became drowsy, but a noise downstairs followed by a “Ho, Ho, Ho” roused her enough for one more chuckle. She contemplated going downstairs to thank Crowley, but figured he wouldn’t want to be bothered by her at that late hour. Instead, she grabbed several quilts and pillows and made a makeshift bed beside the Christmas tree. After placing all her gifts back under the tree, where she could continue to admire them, Leah snuggled into her blankets and allowed the twinkling lights to lure her into a peaceful sleep.
Leah had been invited to Lulu’s house for a Christmas brunch. She awoke early and prepared an apple cinnamon French toast casserole to contribute to the meal. While that was baking, she wrapped Lulu’s gift, a specialty cookbook full of healthy recipes. Nick had ordered it last week when Leah was unable to find one among his selections. She was excited to see Lulu’s reaction to it. Lulu always had Leah look up healthy recipes on the computer, and Leah couldn’t wait to do the same task with the cookbook. It was a thick volume, and she was sure they’d both be content for a while. As she thought about this, Leah discovered she had already grown some roots here without realizing it.
Leah dug around in her luggage and found a burgundy tunic top and a pair of dress pants. She thought the scarf and hat would go pretty well with her outfit. The pants were a little on the baggy side, but she didn’t mind.
After dressing, Leah headed out the café front door and took a right. She took a few deep breaths and was thankful that the normal pinch in her side was finally gone.
“Nice getup you’re wearing there, young lady,” Crowley said as he walked up behind her.
“Yeah? I thought you might like it,” Leah said in her best southern accent. She noticed he was wearing his silly beanie hat and scarf.
“Merry Christmas, Leah.”
“Merry Christmas to you, Crowley. And thank you for my gift.”
“What gift?” He winked. “Let me carry that for you,” he said as he pulled the covered casserole dish and gift out of her hand.
“Thank you, sir. That’s mighty gentlemanly of you.” Leah smiled.
The two neighbors walked on over to Lulu’s house, where they feasted on a southern Christmas brunch spread of sweet potato biscuits with ham, French toast casserole, spinach quiche, and cinnamon rolls with plenty of fresh-brewed coffee to wash it all down. The trio enjoyed a lazy morning of eating and visiting. Leah observed Lulu and Crowley together; it was like watching an adoring son with his very wise and loving mother. Leah was content to just sit, smiling and observing them, without adding much to the conversation. It felt like she was seeing what a true family was meant to be like.
Chapter Thirteen
New Year’s Eve brought with it a new purposeful air. Change came in on a brutally frosty wind, and the day seemed to curiously attack Leah.
Lulu and Leah sat at one of the outdoor tables in front of the café after closing. Bundled in warm coats and sipping cups of hot tea, the pair tried to relax as they aired out the café and Leah’s apartment.
“The business of collard cooking is stinky,” Leah said, repeating what she stated earlier in the day when she had been stirring a massive pot full of the greens.
Lulu had to explain the southern tradition of eating collard greens and black-eyed peas on New Year’s Day if you hoped for a prosperous year ahead. Leah tried making the point that they were a day early. Lulu then had to explain that this town’s tradition was to have her cook it a day ahead since she didn’t open on New Year’s Day. Most of the customers took their plates of prosperity home to be eaten the following day.
By the time the last plate was out the door, the strong smell had attached itself to every surface, including the women. Lulu and Leah spent a good chunk of the rest of the afternoon cleaning, and then they decided to take a break and sit outside for some fresh cool air. This idea sounded wonderful to Leah, who wasn’t feeling so well. She sat with her feet propped in the chair in front of her. Every so often she would give her collar a sniff and grumble about stinking.
As the women sipped their hot tea, Crowley strolled up with Ana on his arm. They were carrying four champagne flutes and a bottle of sparkling a
pple cider.
“Wow. If it isn’t Ken and Barbie,” Leah said, bringing a chuckle from Lulu.
Ana was dazzling in a gold-sequined strapless mini and matching gold stilettos. Her hair was swept up in a messy, yet sexy, updo that showed off her bare shoulders. Crowley was laidback chic, wearing a white dress shirt, untucked, with dark designer jeans and a tailored black sports jacket. Leah noticed his normal flip-flops were replaced with black leather loafers. He even had his unruly locks tamed down a bit.
“We just wanted to share a toast with my two favorite ladies before Crowley escorts me to the New Year’s Celebration at the Beach Club,” Ana said as she handed out the flutes for Crowley to fill.
“I don’t drink,” Leah said.
“Good thing for you it’s just sparkling cider.” Ana smiled as she raised her glass. “Okay, New Year’s resolution time. I’ll go first. Let’s see… Oh yeah. I want to start a website to sell my clothing line.” Everyone agreed she could succeed with no problem.
Lulu went next. “This year, I want to commit more of my time to charity work.”
Leah raised her groggy eyebrows at that. “Seems to me you commit a good bit of time to me and ole Jessup already.” Everyone shot her a surprised look.
Crowley cleared his throat. “This year, I promise to spend more time fishing and being lazy.” The group laughed again.
“It’s your turn, Leah,” Ana said.
“I resolve to avoid any more stupid accidents,” she said, causing Crowley to give Lulu an I-told-you-so look.
“That’s a mighty fine resolution,” Lulu said as the group sipped their sparkling cider.