by Talbot Mundy
“That fellow Ramsden is big and strong, but he is a nervous wreck. Give him the least excuse and he will yell for the police like a baby crying for its mother! He looks on Omar as his bodyguard now that he has dismissed me; and if Omar should get killed, or disappear between here and Haifa, Ramsden would demand an escort of police. In fact, I think he’d lose courage altogether and put that letter in a strong-room in the Haifa bank. What is the letter, anyway? What’s in it? How much will you pay me if I get it for you?”
“Never mind what’s in it. Will you get it, that’s the point — will you get it and bring it to me?”
“That isn’t the point at all,” answered Jeremy. “The point is how much will you pay me if I do that?”
“Very well, I will pay you fifty pounds.”
“Mashallah! You must need it awfully badly. I could have been hired for fifty shillings to do a much more dangerous thing!”
“Well, twenty-five pounds ought to be enough. I will pay you twenty- five.”
“Nothing less than fifty!” Jeremy retorted. “I always get fifty of everything. Fifty lashes in the jail — fifty beans at meal-time — fifty pairs of boots to clean for Ramsden — fifty is my lucky number. I have made forty-nine attempts to get married, and the next time I shall succeed. If it isn’t the woman’s lucky number too, that’s her affair. Show me the fifty pounds.”
“I haven’t that much with me,” answered Yussuf Dakmar. “I will pay you in Damascus.”
“All right. Then I will give you the letter in Damascus.”
“No, no! Get it as soon as possible.”
“I will.”
“And give it to me immediately. Then if you like you can stay close to me until I pay you in Damascus.”
“‘The ass is invited to a wedding to carry wood and water, and they beat him with one of the sticks he carried,’” Jeremy quoted. “No, no, no! I will get the letter, for I know how. After I have it you may keep close to me until we reach Damascus. I will show it to you, but I won’t give it to you until after I get the fifty pounds.”
“Very well, since you are so untrustful.”
“Untrustful? I am possessed by a demon of mistrust! Why? Because I know I am not the worst person in the world, and what I can think of, another might do. Now, if you were I and I were you, which God forbid, because I am a happy fellow and you look bilious, and you stole the letter for me because I promised to pay you in Damascus, but wouldn’t give me the letter until I paid you, do you know what I would think of doing? I would promise a few tough fellows ten pounds among them to murder you. Thus I would get the letter and save forty pounds.”
“Ah? But I am not that kind of man,” said Yussuf Dakmar.
“Well, you will learn what kind of man you are in the next world when you reach the Judgment Seat. What is most interesting now is the kind of fellow I am. I will steal the letter from Ramsden, and keep it until you pay me in Damascus. But I shan’t sleep, and I shall watch you; and if I suspect you of making plans to have me robbed or murdered I shall make such a noise that everybody will come running, and then I shall be a celebrity but they’ll put you in jail.”
“Very well; you steal the letter, and I’ll keep close to you,” said Yussuf Dakmar. “But how are you going to do it, now that Ramsden has dismissed you from his service?”
“Oh, that’s easy. You get me some whisky and I’ll take it to him for a peace offering. He’ll forgive anyone who brings him whisky.”
“Tee-hee! That is quite an idea. Yes. Now — how can I get whisky on the train? If only I could get some! I have a little soporific in a paper packet that could be mixed with the whisky to make him sleep soundly. Wait here while I walk down the train and see what I can find.”
Yussuf Dakmar was gone twenty minutes, and whether he begged, bought or stole did not transpire, but he returned with a pint flask containing stuff that looked and smelt enough like whisky to get by if there had been a label on the bottle. He poured a powder into it in Jeremy’s presence, the two of them squatting on the floor of the corridor with the bottle between them so that no one else might see what was taking place.
“Now, you would better get rid of that fellow Omar while you attend to this,” Yussuf Dakmar cautioned him. “Can you think of any way of doing that?”
“Oh, easily!” Jeremy answered. “He is a great one for the women. I will tell him there is a pretty Armenian girl in the car behind. He will run like any other Turk to have a good look at her.”
“Very well. I will wait here. But understand now; I am a dangerous man. You have fortune in one hand, but destruction in the other!”
“Very well; but this may take me an hour, and if you grow impatient, and that Indian sees you peering into the compartment after having watched you and me talking all this time, he’ll grow suspicious.”
“All right; I’ll go to the car behind. As soon as you have the letter, come and tell me.”
So Jeremy came back and entertained Grim and me with a burlesque account of the interview, after whispering to Narayan Singh to give the alarm in the event of Yussuf Dakmar returning forward to spy on us. Grim put the doped whisky into his valise after a sniff at it, instead of throwing it out of the window at my suggestion; and after a suitable interval he went out in the part of the Turk to look for the imaginary beautiful Armenian. Then I gave Jeremy the fake letter back, and went to sleep.
So it’s no use asking me what the country looks like between Ludd and Haifa. I didn’t even wake up to see the Lake of Tiberias, Sea of Galilee, or Bahr Tubariya, as it is variously called. A rather common sickness is what Sir Richard Burton called Holylanditis and I’ve had it, as well as the croup and measles in my youth. Some folk never recover from it, and to them a rather ordinary sheet of water and ugly modern villages built on ruins look like the pictures that an opium smoker sees.
The ruins and the history do interest me, but you can’t see them from the train, and after a night without sleep there seemed to me something more profitable in view than to hang from a window and buy fish that undoubtedly had once swum in Galilee water, but that cost a most unrighteous price and stank as if straight from a garbage heap.
The whole train reeked of putrid fish when we reached Haifa in the evening, in time to watch the sun go down across the really glorious Bay of Acre.
CHAPTER 9. “The rest will be simple!”
Haifa was crowded with Syrians of all sorts, and there were two or three staff officers in the uniform of Faisal’s army lounging on the platform, who conned new arrivals with a sort of childlike solicitude, as if by looking in a man’s face they could judge whether he was friendly to their cause or not. Mabel had wired to her friend, and was met at the station, so we had nothing to worry over for the present on her score. Our own troubles began when we reached the only hotel and found it crowded. The proprietor, a little wizened, pockmarked Arab in a black alpaca jacket and yellow pants, with a tarbush balanced forward at a pessimistic angle, suggested that there might be guests in the hotel who would let us share their beds ...
“Although there will be no reduction of the price to either party in that event,” he hastened to explain.
It was a wonder of an hotel. You could smell the bugs and the sanitary arrangements from the front-door step, and although the whole place had been lime-washed, dirt from all over the Near East was accumulating on the dead white, making it look leprous and depressing.
The place fronted on a main street, with its back toward the Bay of Acre at a point where scavengers used the beach for a dumping place. There was a hostel of British officers about a mile away, where Grim might have been able to procure beds for the whole party; but I noticed no less than five men who followed us up from the station and seemed to be keeping a watchful eye on Yussuf Dakmar and it was a sure bet that if we should show our hands so far as to mess with British officers, the train next day would be packed with men to whom murder would be simple amusement.
Yet Grim and Jeremy needed sleep and so did Naray
an Singh. We offered to rent an outhouse for the night — a cellar — the roof, but there was nothing doing, and it was Yussuf Dakmar at last who solved the problem for us.
He found a crony of his, who had occupied for several days a room containing two beds. With unheard-of generosity, accompanied, however, by a peculiar display of yellow teeth and more of the jaundiced whites of his eyes than I cared to see, this individual offered to go elsewhere for the night and to place the room at my disposal.
“But there is this about it,” he explained. “Where I am going there is no room for my friend Yussuf Dakmar Bey, so I must ask you to let him share this with you. You and he could each have a bed, of course, but it seems to me that your servants look wearier than you do. I suggest then that you take one bed, effendi, and share it with my friend Yussuf Dakmar Bey, leaving the other to your servants, who I hope will be suitably grateful for the consideration shown them.”
Grim nodded to me from behind the Syrians’ backs, and I jumped at the offer. Payment was refused. The man explained that he had the room by the week and the loan of it to me for one night would cost him nothing. In fact, he acted courteously and with considerable evidence of breeding, merely requesting my permission to lock the big closet where he kept his personal belongings and to take the key away with him. Even if we had been in a mood to cavil it would have been difficult to find fault, for it was a spacious, clean and airy room — three characteristics each of which is as scarce as the other in that part of the world.
The beds stood foot to foot along the right wall as you entered. Against the opposite wall was a cheap wooden wash-stand and an enormous closet built of olive wood sunk into a deep recess. The thing was about eight feet wide and reached to the ceiling; you couldn’t tell the depth because he locked it at once and pocketed the key, and it fitted into the recess so neatly that a knife-blade would hardly have gone into the crack.
Outside the bedroom door, in a lobby furnished with odds and ends, was a wickerwork sofa that would do finely for Narayan Singh, and that old soldier didn’t need to have it pointed out to him. Without word or sign from us he threw his kit on the floor, unrolled his blankets, removed his boots, curled up on the sofa, and if he didn’t go to sleep at once, gave such a perfect imitation of it that somebody’s fox terrier came and sniffed him, and, recognizing a campaigner after his own wandering heart, jumped on his chest and settled down to sleep too.
As soon as our host had left the room, all bows and toothy smiles, Jeremy with his back to me drew from one pocket the letter he was supposed to have stolen from me, flourished it in Yussuf Dakmar’s face, and concealed it carefully in another. Then a new humorous notion occurred to him. He pulled it out again, folded it in the pocket wallet in which he had carried it from the first, wrapped the whole in a handkerchief, which he knotted carefully and then handed it to me.
“Effendi,” he said, “you are a fierce master and a mighty drunkard, but a man without guile. Keep that till the morning. Then, if Omar wants to steal it he will have to murder you instead of me, and I would rather sleep than die. But you must give it back at dawn, because the prayers are in it that a very holy ma’lim wrote for me, and unless I read those prayers properly tomorrow’s train will come to grief before we reach Damascus.”
He acted the part perfectly of one of those half-witted, wholly shrewd mountebanks, who pick up a living by taking advantage of tolerance and good nature. You’ve all seen the type. It’s commonest at race-meetings but you’ll find it anywhere in the world where vagrant men of means forgather.
Again Yussuf Dakmar’s face became a picture of suppressed emotion. I pocketed the wallet with the same matter-of-fact air with which I have accepted a servant’s money to keep safe for him scores of times. He believed me to be a drunkard, who had been thoroughly doped that day and would probably drink hard that night to drown the after-taste. It ought to be easy to rob me while I slept. Any fool could have read his thoughts.
He came down and ate supper with us at a trestle table in the dimly lighted dining-room, and I encouraged his new-born optimism by ordering two bottles of whisky to take upstairs. Jeremy, who can’t be happy unless playing his part for all it’s worth, became devoutly religious and made a tremendous fuss because ham was put on the table. He accused the proprietor of using pig’s fat to smear all the cooking utensils, demanded to see the kitchen, and finally refused to eat anything but lebban, which is a sort of curds. If Yussuf Dakmar had entertained suspicions of Jeremy’s real nationality they were all resolved by the time that meal was finished.
But the five’ men who had followed us from the station sat in the dark at a table in the far corner of the room and watched every move we made. When the coffee was brought I sat smoking and surly over it, as if my head ached from the day’s drink; Grim and Jeremy, aching for sleep but refusing like good artists to neglect a detail of their part, went to another table and played backgammon, betting quarrelsomely; and at last one of the five men walked over and touched Yussuf Dakmar’s shoulder. At once he followed all five of them out of the room, whereat Grim and Jeremy promptly went to bed. It was so obviously my turn to stay awake that Grim didn’t even trouble to remind me of it.
So I took the whisky upstairs, noticed that Narayan Singh was missing from the couch where he had gone to sleep, although the fox-terrier was snoring so loud in his blankets that I had to look twice in the dim light. I mentioned that fact to Grim who merely smiled as he got between the sheets. Then I went down to the street to get exercise and fresh air. I didn’t go far, but strode up and down in front of the hotel a quarter of a mile or so in each direction, keeping in the middle of the street.
I had made the fourth or fifth turn when Narayan Singh came out and accosted me under the lamplight.
“Pardon,” he called aloud in English, “does the sahib know where I can find a druggist’s open at this hour? I have a tooth-ache and need medicine.”
“Come and I’ll show you a place,” said I with the patronizing air of a tourist showing off his knowledge, and we strode along together down the street, he holding one hand to his jaw.
“Thus and so it happened, sahib,” he began as soon as we had gone a safe distance. “I lay sleeping, having kept my belly empty that I might wake easily. There came Yussuf Dakmar and five men brushing by me, and they all went into a room four doors beyond the sahib’s. The room next beyond that one is occupied by an officer sahib, who fought at El-Arish alongside my battalion. Between him and me is a certain understanding based on past happenings in which we both had a hand. He is not as some other sahibs, but a man who opens both ears and his heart, and when I knocked on his door he opened it and recognized me.
“‘Well?’ said he. ‘Why not come and see me in the morning?
“‘Sahib,’ said I, ‘for the sake of El-Arish, let me in quickly, and close the door!’
“So he did, wondering and not pleased to be disturbed by a Sikh at such an hour. And I said to him:
“‘Sahib,’ said I, ‘am I a badmash? A scoundrel?’
“‘No,’ said he, ‘not unless you changed your morals when you left the service.’
“Said I, ‘I am still in the service.’
“‘Good,’ said he. ‘What then?’
“‘I go listening again in no-man’s land,’ said I, and he whistled softly. ‘Is there not a roof below your window?’ I asked him, and he nodded.
“‘Then let me use it, sahib, and return the same way presently.’
“So he threw back the shutter, asking no more questions, and I climbed out. The window of the room where Yussuf Dakmar and the five were stood open, but the lattice shutter was closed tight, so that I could stand up on the flat roof of the kitchen and listen without being seen. And, sahib, I could recognize the snarl of Yussuf Dakmar’s voice even before my ear was laid to the open lattice. He was like a dog at bay. The other five were angry with him. They were accusing him of playing false. They swore that a great sum could be had for that letter, which they shou
ld share between them. Said a voice I did not recognize: ‘If the French will pay one price they will pay another; what does money matter to them, if they can make out a case against Faisal? Will they not have Syria? The thing is simple as twice two,’ said he. ‘The huntsman urges on the hounds, but unless he is cleverer than they, who eats the meat? The French regard us as animals, I tell you! Very well; let us live up to the part and hunt like animals, since he who has the name should have the game as well; and when we have done the work and they want booty let them be made aware that animals must eat! We will set our own price on that document.’
“‘And as for this Yussuf Dakmar,’ said another man, ‘let him take a back seat unless he is willing to share and share alike with us. He is not difficult to kill!’
“And at that, sahib, Yussuf Dakmar flew into a great rage and called them fools of complicated kinds.
“‘Like hounds without a huntsman, ye will overrun the scent!’ said he; and he spoke more like a man than any of them, although not as a man to be liked or trusted. ‘Who are ye to clap your fat noses on the scent I found and tell me the how and whither of it? It may be that I can get that letter tonight. Surely I can get it between this place and Damascus; and no one can do that, for I, and I only, know where it is. Nor will I tell!’ And they answered all together, ‘We will make you tell!’
“But he said, ‘All that ye five fools can do is to interfere. Easy to kill me, is it? Well, perhaps. It has been tried. But, if so, then though ye are jackals, kites and vultures all in one with the skill of chemists added, ye can never extract secret knowledge from a dead man’s brain. Then that letter will reach Faisal tomorrow night; and the French, who speak of you now as of animals, will call you what? Princes? Noblemen?’