Strictly Incubusiness

by Vanessa Mulberry

  Tynan silently counted to ten.

  “Do you want to…?” Kai let the words trail off, but he sounded hopeful.

  Tynan could only see the top of Kai’s head. “Nope,” he said.

  Kai wriggled around again, this time so he could face Tynan. “Look, I don’t want you any more than you want me.” That wasn’t a lie, but Tynan did want Kai’s body, and they both knew it. “But I need fucking, and I’ve not got a whole lot of options right now.”

  It would be a slippery slope. Tynan never messed about with anyone he was bringing in. He rarely messed about with anyone at all. But he wasn’t worried it would happen again with another acquisition; he was worried he would want it to happen again with Kai.

  Gorgeous, long-lived, and potentially innocent of the terrible crime he was accused of. If they’d met any way but this… Kai wasn’t even that annoying, not really. He was just noisy, and Tynan could ignore it, for now. If he started actually charming Tynan, then there would be trouble.

  For Kai, sex was lunch, but Tynan wasn’t like him. Intimacy was an emotional as well as physical experience. If he slept with Kai, feelings might develop, and that couldn’t be allowed to happen. Even if the incubus was as innocent as he made out, he had said he didn’t work that way.

  “So, everyone gets one go?” Tynan asked.

  Kai looked hopeful at the sudden interest. “Soldiers sometimes get a second go. They’re not likely to live to the end of their natural lifespan, so I’ll take up to two weeks, if they say that’s alright. But I don’t make a regular thing of it. If they like you, and you like them, it can get a bit awkward.”

  “How?”

  Kai hesitated and his cheeks flushed. He looked ashamed. “Every fuck drains them,” he said sheepishly. “You know that, right? I don’t always have to feed, but if I didn’t feed on my lover then I’d have to have sex with someone else too. Not many people in love want to share.”

  Had Kai never had a regular lover? It had been a very long time for Tynan, but even he had loved and been loved several times over during his four hundred years of life. “I’m sorry,” he said.

  Kai shrugged like he didn’t care. Although he didn’t speak to tell a lie, Tynan knew he did.

  “The honeymoon period alone could wipe years off a man’s life.” Kai sighed. “It’s not worth it for them, or me for that matter. I don’t think I could handle the guilt if I killed someone I love. Even if it was an accident.”

  Well, there was no danger of Kai killing him, but Tynan felt it would still be wrong to pursue something. Kai was his captive. Tynan could not take advantage of the situation.

  But he wasn’t going to tell Kai that. He ignored his empathy, and his desire, and rolled onto his back. “Well, you’re not for me. You’ve got that big cock and the proportions are right, but you’re kind of small for an incubus,” he said dismissively.

  It worked. Kai was offended. “Not that it is any of your business, but my mother was a pixie,” he snapped.

  “Really?”

  “Incubus can come in all shapes and sizes.”

  “I heard you’ll come in anything that’s got a hole.”

  Kai rolled away, taking the blanket with him. That was alright. He needed it more than Tynan did.

  “I don’t mock you for how you live,” Kai said. “What are you, some sort of witch?”

  “Standard immortal hero. I got a bit of magical training for this job, but I’m no expert.”

  Kai rolled back, a grin on his face. “You’re immortal? Of course! No wonder just looking at you makes me want to fuck all night. I thought my hunger was a bit extreme compared to your level of attractiveness—which wouldn’t be insignificant if you cleaned up, but you’ve not done that yet.” He looked ready to devour Tynan then and there.

  “No. Oh no. Don’t look at me like that. I told you: not me.”

  “I’m going to need sex soon, and it can’t kill you if you’re immortal. This is perfect! I can fuck you all day and it won’t hurt you at all!”

  “You’re not fucking me. That thing between your legs is enormous. Totally unusable. And you’re my captive. I adhere to the Bounty Hunter Guild’s code of ethics.”

  Kai dropped his voice low and shifted to bring his lips up to Tynan’s ear. “I’ve never found a hole I couldn’t fit if I gave it enough attention first,” he whispered, “but if you’re not man enough to try then you should know my ass works too. I’m a demon that was born to have sex. Stuff just slides in and then I tighten right up.”

  “Don’t care. Not happening.” Tynan sat up and shuffled his ass off the cart before anything did happen because talking about it was enough to get him fully hard, and it wasn’t just that Kai was, as he’d put it, eminently fuckable. Tynan hadn’t been with a man for decades and he missed being touched. It was difficult, being this close.

  “What does the code say about the treatment of prisoners?” Kai asked, sitting up too and pulling the blanket tightly around himself.

  “That you should have your basic needs met. Food, water, shelter if possible. If you’re ill, you get medicine.”

  “Ah-ha! And what do you think is an incubi’s basic needs?” Kai asked triumphantly.

  “Have a wank, and I will make sure you are well fed on proper food. I’m not here to service you. I have rights too. There’d be a health and safety issue if I put my life in danger by fucking you.”

  “You’re immortal!”

  “Still don’t care.”

  Scowling all the way, Kai wriggled himself off the cart too. “Alright,” he said, waving a finger in Tynan’s general direction, “Starve me if you want. You can deal with the consequences later.”

  That sounded like a threat. Stiff cock or not, Tynan had to do something about it. He tackled Kai, pushing him up against the side of the cart so their bodies were flush against each other. “Are you threatening to rape me?” he demanded.

  “What? No!” Kai said, looking sickened by the suggestion. “I’m threatening to run away and find someone who will have me. I’m innocent, but I’m not going to be kept like this.”

  Tynan huffed and let go of Kai. He took up his bag, fishing out hard tack and a jar of preserve for their breakfast. “I’ve leg irons remember,” he threatened, hoping it would be enough. He had no intention of using them.

  A cough startled them both. Tynan spun around, moving into an attack position. The wards were in place, but the reaction was instant. He was prepared to fight.

  But it didn’t seem he would have to. A naked, and extremely hairy, man was leaning against a tree just outside of the protective circle.

  “Wolfram the Disemboweler, I take it?” Tynan asked.

  Wolfram grinned at him. He had unusually long and sharp looking teeth even in his human form. “Well guessed.”

  Tynan looked around. He couldn’t see any of the wolves that had watched them the previous night, but that didn’t mean they weren’t there.

  “I am an immortal, he is a demon,” Tynan said, nodding his head in Kai’s direction. “If I remove the iron from his wrists, we’ll be more powerful than you and your doggy army. So, why don’t you piss off?”

  Wolfram snorted and ignored him, turning his attention to Kai. “It is an honor to meet you.” He bent into a formal bow and did not come back up.”

  Kai looked confused but for once seemed to have decided not to run his mouth. He looked to Tynan, who nodded he should speak.

  “And you too,” Kai said, “assuming you’re not going to set any more wolves on us. You may rise.”

  Wolfram returned to his position, leaning against the tree. “It was an unfortunate mistake. Had we known you’d killed the prince, we’d have welcomed you.”

  “It would have been a bit late to ask questions if your pack had eaten me.”

  “Indeed. But they’re simple wolves, not gifted with the power to understand human speech. You could not have reasoned with them.”

  “But you can?” Kai asked skeptically.

&nb
sp; “And I did. The prince hunted my kind for years. You have saved a great many of my species, and we owe you a debt of gratitude.”

  “I do my best.”

  Tynan watched the exchange, disturbed by the way Kai was looking at Wolfram’s dick. “Will you guarantee us safe passage through the forest?” he asked, wanting an end to the conversation.

  Wolfram ignored him, looking instead to Kai for permission to answer the question. When Kai nodded he should speak, he fixed Tynan with a disdainful glare. “You’ll have no trouble from us, but we won’t protect you. You maimed three of my finest, and many in the pack do not believe you deserve to go free. While you protect the incubus, you will be safe. If anything happens to him, I can’t speak for what they will do to you.” He stepped away from the bush and crouched down on the ground. “You weren’t the only visitors to the forest yesterday. There is a human camp two miles north of here, and they were offered a princely sum to find you both. We have killed most of them for you.”

  “Um, thanks?” Kai said, nose wrinkling slightly.

  Tynan would have asked how many men were left, but Wolfram was off and running. They heard him howl as soon as he was out of sight.

  Chapter Seven

  “So let me get this straight. Instead of sneaking around them, you want to walk right into a camp full of bandits, who are actively looking to capture us, and talk to them?”

  Kai had heard some stupid ideas in his time. This ranked right up there amongst the most ridiculous.

  They were walking the horse, Tynan having determined that this was the safest way to approach the settlement, and unlike Kai, he seemed completely relaxed.

  “I want to talk to them. You have a better plan?”

  Kai had a hundred better plans, none of which included walking towards danger. “They are north of us, so I propose we turn around and head due south away from them and dispense with the talking.”

  “But Belmon is north of our position.”

  “Another excellent reason to go south until you make up your mind about my guilt or innocence.”

  Tynan stopped walking, bringing the horse to a halt alongside him. He looked down at his feet for a while, then up at the sky. Kai assumed he was thinking, but it was hard to tell with Tynan.

  Eventually he started forward again. “We head north. If you’re innocent, you’ve nothing to worry about. You’ll have the trial and be set free.” Even Tynan seemed unconvinced by what he was saying.

  Kai sighed. “I don’t think that would be very convenient for whoever did kill him, do you?” He stole a glance at Tynan and knew that the comment disconcerted him.

  They walked at an average pace, which Kai assumed was Tynan’s attempt at looking relaxed again. To be fair, he did look relaxed about the meeting. If he was immortal, he could probably take the lot of them in a fight. His body had seemed to repel the wolf that attacked him, skin impervious to penetration, bulk too large to be knocked over, even by something as powerful as a wolf. He was big and strong and could afford to be cocky.

  Not that he acted cocky. He was a stubborn, grumpy bastard, but every interaction indicated Tynan was essentially a decent man. The fact he used magic instead of his fists said a lot in the world they lived in. But he was only taking care of himself in the long run, and Kai had not forgotten that Tynan was an asshole, even if he was a moral one.

  He had also not forgotten about the heavy iron cuffs that sapped his strength. Kai’s earlier thoughts about protecting Tynan were put aside. Tynan would be fine in a fight. Kai was the one at risk.

  They smelled the camp before they saw it. The scent of frying bacon reached their noses, and they both took a deep sniff.

  “These lot smell pretty civilized to me,” Tynan said, striding ahead and walking the horse and cart directly into the camp.

  There were only three of them, and one had been pretty badly mauled very recently—no doubt during the previous evening’s scuffle with Wolfram’s pack.

  The camp was big enough for there to have been others, but a small pile of possessions on the floor suggested those men were dead. The survivors would probably divvy up their things after breakfast.

  They looked weary, and none of them bothered to get up to defend the camp. Perhaps they had fought much of the night and then buried their dead. They weren’t in a position to fight again now.

  “Who are you?” one of them, possibly the leader, asked. If he was in charge, it looked like this was a very new position.

  “Travelers,” Tynan said. “We want an escort to guide us through the forest. There will be men looking for us.” He looked at each one of them pointedly, and Kai noted that, to their credit, they didn’t flinch beneath his gaze.

  The leader snorted and looked towards his mauled comrade. “We’re not for hire right now.”

  “Hold up,” a third, greasy-haired little man piped up. “How much are you offering?”

  “Nothing other than food and water,” Tynan said. “But we won’t kill you in any fight you want to have with us about it. Sound reasonable?”

  “It sounds like you’re looking for a boot up your ass,” the leader growled, though he didn’t bother to get up

  But Greasy wasn’t done. “Leave it off, John,” he said. “It’ll be easy work, and we’re not in a position to fulfill our… last contract. Let’s do it.”

  “For no payment?”

  “Look, the payment’s right there.” He pointed at Kai. “It wasn’t like we weren’t hoping to get a turn.”

  Years of working in a brothel had given Kai a strong constitution, and having skipped three feeds now, he was feeling antsy. As repellent as this man was, he would do. He was about to lay out a list of terms that included washing, delousing, and a full inspection of all cavities before commencement, when Tynan said, “Not him.”

  “Pardon?” Kai spluttered, turning all his attention to Tynan, needs be damned. “I’ll speak for myself, and I am interested in their business proposal.” Turning back to Greasy he asked, ever so politely, “Is it just the three of you?”

  “I told you, no,” Tynan snapped, nostrils flaring. He was angry, which Kai thought was a bit rich given that he made such a big deal about treating Kai respectfully.

  “I told you, I’ll do what I please,” Kai said. “You don’t control what I do with my body.”

  “You’re my prisoner, so right now I do. I’m not pimping you out. We’re leaving.”

  Tynan set off with the cart, walking it right through the camp and leaving a trail of horseshit in his wake. Kai, trudged off after him, cursing the cuffs for the umpteenth time.

  “Oi!” Greasy shouted after them.

  “Now you leave it,” John shouted back at him.

  Leaving them to their argument, they walked a couple of hundred feet in silence. Kai held in the urge to comment until he just couldn’t stand it any longer and said, “Well, that was a waste of time.”

  “They know we know they’re here. And they know we know they’re weak. That’s useful.”

  “Sure. Now they know that they’ll have to be really sneaky if they want to attack us, and you know they will now you’ve gone and wound them up.”

  “Shut up,” Tynan said.

  Kai mock sighed and carried right on. “It’s not too late. We could go back there and I could sort them all out in an hour top. Then we head on, me full of delicious human life force, you pleased that you don’t have to fuck me yourself.”

  “I did say shut up out loud, didn’t I?” Tynan barked abruptly. “You heard me?”

  The display of anger didn’t worry Kai one bit, and he chattered on regardless. “Then we’ll meet the next lot of bandits, and you’ll piss them off again because that’s what you do, and I’ll fuck them because that’s what I do and…”

  “Annoying little shit,” Tynan muttered, and Kai knew he’d truly hit his mark.

  Tynan led the horse back to the path and they got back up onto the cart, this time both sitting up at the front. “Right. Onwards t
hen,” he said, setting the horse off at a gentle trot.

  Onwards to where was less clear. Tynan had asked the bandits to act as guides, and while it might have been a ploy, Kai couldn’t rely on it.

  “Do you know these woods at all?” Kai asked.

  “I know we need to go north through them.”

  That was just another way of saying ‘no,' which was very good news for Kai, who had spent enough time in these woods on his escape from Timothy’s Palace that he could navigate them with ease. There was one particularly excellent place that would act as a safe house, allow him to cut his cuffs off, and most importantly, have a warm bath and wash his clothes.

  And it was the perfect place to get what he needed from Tynan. Immortals were like an addictive drug for incubi, and Kai’s plans had changed the moment he heard the word. Kai could quite happily stop giving a toss about Tynan’s safety, but now the sex really would be worth waiting out. At the lodge, he could take enough life force to keep him fed for months, cut his cuffs while Tynan slept it off, and that would be that.

  “Well, I know a little more than you do,” Kai said smugly.

  Tynan eyed him. “Are you showing off, or is that a threat?”

  “I’m just mentioning it. I can hardly run off and leave you now. But I know a place we can stop at on the way.”

  “What place?” Tynan asked. Kai was pleased he didn’t sound suspicious.

  “A lodge. It’s about four days walk north-north-east, but it’ll have a fireplace and a roof. Decent food. A big comfy bed.”

  Kai wasn’t sure if he imagined it, but Tynan seemed to flush slightly at the mention of the bed.

  “How do you know about it?” Tynan asked. Now he sounded suspicious.

  “It belongs to Timothy. He never took me there, but there was a big map of the forest in the barracks at the palace.”

  “Was it on the ceiling? I’m guessing as it seems you saw it a lot.”

  Kai ignored the insult, figuring it was the only way Tynan could communicate he wanted to fuck Kai—by being mean like a teenage human. It had been less than twenty-four hours since they’d met, but Kai couldn’t comprehend a situation in which Tynan wouldn’t want to fuck him. For most men he met, he’d have given them twenty-four seconds.