‘Not asked as much as told,’ she said. ‘I’d appreciate it if you didn’t give out my schedule so freely.’
‘I didn’t tell the bastard anything,’ Blaser said. ‘He knows more than a few of the Risqué girls.’
‘Oh,’ she said, wondering again if Blaser “knew” them too. To distract herself, she changed the subject. ‘I told him I had no interest in romance, but he said we were family. I don’t want to disrespect him, but I’d feel better if you were there with us. If it’s a family meal, that shouldn’t be a problem, right?’
The edge of his lips curled. ‘No, I guess not. I like the way you think.’
‘I don’t like to be alone with men I don’t trust,’ she admitted.
‘You don’t trust Mattie?’
‘I’ve never trusted Mattie, he’s too smooth, and I know what he’s into. I want no part of that.’
‘You’re in your own trouble,’ Blaser said. ‘And I got you into plenty of bother back in the day, yet you came to me. You still trust me.’
‘You’re different now,’ she said. ‘You’re not like you were back then and you never pretended to be something that you’re not. And, you saved me from assault in the alley.’ Displaying her own smile, she hoped to put him at ease. ‘You proved yourself. If you’re uncomfortable and don’t want to—‘
‘I’ll be there,’ he said. ‘I know my cousin. I know what he’s like.’
‘What does that mean?’ Leaning forward he brushed his lips over hers then he retreated, leaving her stunned. ‘Why did you do that?’
‘Staking a claim,’ he said. ‘I want you to know that I do have… intentions toward you. Everyone will go nuts, but there’s no point in me denying it to myself. If I do, I might lose my chance… Mattie’s moved up my timetable.’
‘Blaser,’ she sighed.
‘No pressure and no hurry. You’re free to do what you want. If you’re not interested, then you can tell me to go to hell… But I don’t want to lose out on a chance with you through a dumb miscommunication. So there it is.’
He put the vehicle in gear and drove out the end of the alley and toward the apartments. Blaser was an attractive guy, six three with defined features and thick dirt brown hair. There probably wasn’t a female employee in Risqué who didn’t have designs on him at some point. Yet he walked through life with blinders on, oblivious to his own appeal.
Knowing what she did of him now, and his hectic schedule, she could believe what he’d said about not having had a girlfriend for six months. The man seemed to do nothing but work… and worry about her.
‘When did you decide this?’ she asked, clasping her purse in her lap. ‘I thought you were just being a friend.’
‘I was, I didn’t help you out with the idea of getting into your panties. But you’ve been driving me wild for three days, Dollface. I can’t keep walking around the club with a boner, someone’s bound to get the wrong idea.’
‘Blaser,’ she said, enjoying how his name felt on her lips, but wound tight by what he was suggesting. Closing her eyes, she relaxed her head on the backrest and tried to breathe through the tears that hadn’t fully subsided since she embraced Mattie. ‘We can’t… I mean… I can’t…’
‘I’m not asking you for sex, I’m telling you that I want to make this work.’
‘This?’ she said, allowing her eyes to open, the motion of the car rocked her head toward him. ‘You want to go back to the way things were? How do I explain that to my incarcerated brother?’
‘While he’s incarcerated it doesn’t really matter what he thinks,’ Blaser said. She sat up, but he pre-empted her imminent tirade. ‘Don’t fly off the handle at me, I’m saying it doesn’t matter what he thinks. When a guy tells you that he wants to be with you, your first thought shouldn’t be, “Oh, what would my brother think?” should it?’
‘So what should it be?’
‘You know what it should be,’ he said, when his hand touched hers she pulled it back. Odd that she should allow Mattie to touch her but recoil from Blaser.
‘You want to know if I’m still in love with you? Is that it?’ she said, realising why Blaser was more of a threat to her than Mattie. In all likelihood, Blaser would get her naked again if he put his mind to it, and she wasn’t sure if she was ready for that yet. ‘I do love you, Blase. A part of me will always love you; you were my first love, Love.’
‘Doesn’t mean I can’t be your last love too.’
‘You’re not ready to settle down,’ she said, but it could be that was more of her hope than her true deduction. ‘Have you told Crystal how you feel about me?’
‘Crystal?’ he frowned. ‘What does she have to do with it?’
‘She’s always wanted to be with you Blaser, since way back in high school, you know that.’
‘This isn’t a competition,’ he said. ‘You think I’m some dumb prize?’
‘If you were then, I’d have won and I wouldn’t be trying to tell you that it’s impossible.’
‘What’s impossible?’
‘I can’t be with you, Blaser. I can’t be with any man. I tried it and it didn’t work.’
‘You’re talking about the guy you were with in Jersey?’
‘Scott? No. I’m not talking about him, that didn’t work out, he was still in love with his ex. We called it quits long before I got back in touch with you.’
‘So what are you—‘
‘I’m talking about this year. I went on a few dates with a guy after… anyway, it didn’t work. I can’t do it.’
When she’d been freed from her abductors, she had spoken to the police, but had walled herself off from everyone for weeks, even telling Blaser that she’d never want anything to do with him again. But once she fathomed that isolating herself wasn’t helping and she started with her own self-help, she had forced herself to date. It hadn’t worked out, in fact, it had been a disaster. It was then that she knew being intimate with anyone wasn’t going to be an easy step for her.
‘It didn’t work with him,’ Blaser said. ‘But we were great together.’
‘A long time ago,’ she said. ‘And I’m not talking a relationship. I’m talking about sex. I can’t have sex.’
His laugh startled her and when she caught sight of his smile, she folded her arms, wishing she could get away from him. ‘I’m sorry,’ he said. ‘But if you think that sex is what’s driving me… Lyssa’s told me to be patient with you and not to pressure you. I’m not interested in jumping your bones, at least not until you’re ready for it.’
‘Jumping my bones,’ she repeated. ‘What is it with Lyssa anyway? You all talk about her like she’s some sort of messiah, the girls in the club love her too.’
‘She’s a sex therapist and she takes her work everywhere with her. If you give her a chance, you’d like her.’
Suzette and Lyssa hadn’t been back into the club, but Colt had and although he couldn’t be classed as friendly toward her, he also hadn’t given her a hard time. Either Blaser had told his brother to back off or Lyssa had used some of her influence.
‘I didn’t decide not to give her a chance,’ she said. ‘She just… she’s so direct and… I don’t know, maybe it’s just because I don’t have any previous experience with therapy.’
‘You get used to her. I know that you and Colt have never been the best of friends, but he’s giving you a chance. It would be great if you could do the same.’
‘Give Colt a chance?’ she said. ‘He could come to dinner with us tomorrow, him and Lyssa.’
‘Colt at a table with Mattie?’ Blaser said. ‘I’ll ask him, but I doubt he’ll be open to it.’
‘Would you at least invite Gus?’ she said as he pulled into the apartment parking lot. ‘He’s family too, right?’
‘And you’re trying to diffuse any tension between Mattie and me because he’s making a move on my girl and I might take exception to that. You’re smart.’
Climbing out of the vehicle, she fished her keys from her purse w
ondering if she’d inadvertently discouraged him. But when she started up the stairs without saying goodnight he followed on her heels.
‘Bri, babe, I’m sorry if—‘
When she got to her door, she spun around and grabbed a handful of his tee-shirt to yank him forward. Shoving onto her tiptoes, she forced her mouth to his, cutting off his words and making her own intentions clear. Pushing closer, she relaxed her hands on his pecs and he walked her back until he squeezed her against her front door.
This was the same mouth that she’d learned how to kiss with when she was a kid. Every part of her remembered the first kiss they’d shared as teenagers. Blaser’s mouth was more practised than hers then, but he was three years older. Some kind of anxious energy had transferred to her that night and she recognised that same sensation here and now. As a teenager, she hadn’t recognised it for what it was: unsated sexual tension that wanted to explode. Much as they both wanted to heighten the intensity of this kiss, they had to smother that instinct because there was no chance of anything more than a kiss happening tonight.
With a gasp, she lifted her head and smiled at the flames flickering in his eyes. Movement to her left made her glance around to see a grinning neighbour.
‘Dax,’ Blaser said in acknowledgment, but Dax just shuffled past them holding up his hands.
‘I saw nothing,’ Dax said with a smirk on his face.
Dax ran away down the stairs and she took a breath, still squished between Blaser’s solid form and her door.
When Dax had disappeared and they were alone again, he asked her, ‘Why did you do that?’
‘Staking a claim,’ she said, matching his smile. ‘I want to, Blase. I mean I wish that I could… I have no intention of involving myself with any other man. My reluctance… it’s not about you… you know? I don’t want to play games, I want to be straight with you. Intimacy isn’t as easy for me as it used to be… there’s so much that we should talk about, that… I don’t know if it’s a good idea for us to… do this again.’
‘You said you wanted to.’
‘Yeah,’ she said. ‘Because it’s you and… it’s us.’
‘Ignoring what happened to you won’t make it go away,’ he said. ‘You have to work through it, forget about our relationship. You need to process it for your own sanity, don’t let those bastards control you anymore.’
Being in this secure stance the world couldn’t get to her. Blase made her feel so safe, while he was here nothing bad would happen to her, and she’d always known that. He’d been the one to make everything alright in her life for as long as she could remember.
‘After my failed attempt with that guy a few months back, I made a promise to myself that I would get to know a guy properly before I was intimate with him. If the guy wasn’t interested in taking the time to get to know me and be patient with me, then he wouldn’t be worth my time.’
‘Again, proving how smart you are.’
Steeling herself for the answer, she almost didn’t want to ask but she had to. ‘Are you interested?’ she asked. ‘I know that we already know each other pretty well, but… will you be patient before demanding that we get naked and sweaty? I can’t tell you how long it will take. It could be a day, it could be a year. I want to be with a man I can trust and rely on, Blaser. I’m so tired of bullshit.’
Stroking his hands up her arms, shimmers of heat followed the path of his caress which stopped only when his hands were on her face, holding her eyes with his.
‘I’m interested, very interested,’ he said. ‘Naked and sweaty can wait. I’ll keep myself for you… not that I’m inundated with offers.’
‘You’re not oblivious to how hot you are, Blaser. Women fall over themselves around you.’
‘Like I said, I haven’t had time for women.’
‘I’m flattered that you would take the time for me.’
‘You’re special.’
‘You have always told me that I’m different,’ she said. ‘What makes you so sure that this is right?’
‘I’ve known it since before you looked me in the eye,’ he said.
Such a statement was profound given how old he must have been when that clarity struck him. Older and wiser, he still trusted that instinct and she understood that innate connection too, so she couldn’t believe sexual attraction alone had tempted him.
‘You’ll come to dinner tomorrow and promise not to leave me alone with Mattie?’
‘You’re scared of him?’ he asked with growing suspicion. ‘What happened in the locker room tonight?’
‘Nothing indecent, I just… I know what his business is, or rather what it’s not.’
‘Legit,’ he said. ‘He’s not going to get you involved in any trouble. I promise you. No one will get away with hurting you, not ever, you hear me?’ She nodded. ‘Ok, I’m going to kiss you goodnight, then I’m going to watch you go inside. Tomorrow night I’m going to pick you up at seven thirty and we’ll ride to the restaurant together with Gus.’
‘One big happy family,’ she said and he exhaled a laugh.
‘Yeah,’ he said. ‘Enough about them and back to my plan.’
Lowering his mouth to hers, she parted her lips and held herself close to him savouring the sweep of his tongue and his embracing arms around her. Being encompassed in his strength let her relax in a way she’d been unable to for a year. Her attraction to him was as tangible as it ever had been; that had been obvious since Erika moved aside and Bri caught sight of him in the apartment doorway. After so many years apart she’d been unprepared for their physical connection to remain so visceral.
‘If I don’t stop now,’ he said, trailing his lips to her jaw. ‘We’ll still be here when Dax gets back.’
‘Where would he be going at this time of night?’ she asked.
‘I don’t ask questions.’
‘I’ve heard him going out at this hour before, he’s usually gone quite a while, we’ve got some time.’
‘And when you’re ready, I plan to take advantage of that,’ he said and took a step away. ‘Goodnight babe, go inside.’
‘I’ll see you in daylight,’ she said and unlocked her door while he watched her go inside.
On closing the door, she went to the kitchen window which she’d covered with drapes and watched him descend the stairs. In his profile, she witnessed the breadth of his smile. Special was certainly a word that she’d use to describe him too.
Chapter Eight
‘What’s Mattie playing at?’ Gus asked the next night while standing in Blaser’s living room buttoning his shirt. ‘Asking out your girl… wait, is she up for grabs? You might have given me the heads up first.’
‘Don’t even think about it,’ Blaser said, lounging on his couch. ‘Mattie played the family card, so we’re playing it right back.’
‘You know he’ll have a reservation for two, champagne in a high hat, the lot,’ Gus said, reeking of mischief.
‘You like to see your brother get his comeuppance, don’t even kid yourself.’
‘Won’t hear me objecting. I like getting a front row seat to seeing the arrogant jerk put in his place, he thinks he’s all that.’
Blaser stayed on the couch when there was a knock at his door because Gus went over to answer it. Bri thrust an envelope forth, but when Gus took it from her, she paled, clearly she’d expected Blaser to answer his own door.
Gus looked in the envelope. ‘I don’t know what Blaser told you, but I’m an even five hundred for the night. It’s more if you want to cuddle after.’
‘It’s rent,’ she laughed and examined his shirt. ‘Why are you half-dressed?’
‘I’ve not been messing around on you, sweetheart,’ Gus said. ‘I missed a button.’
‘Can I come in?’ she asked him. Gus stayed in her path and looked over his shoulder at Blaser for the permission she sought.
‘Yes, she can come in, move, idiot. I’ll kick you out if you piss her off.’
Gus laughed and moved aside, Bri
came in wearing a brown dress that clung to her hips and flared to halfway down her thighs. Long, tanned legs were his focus and his mouth began to water. She came straight to him, dropped onto the couch at his side and rested the length of her body on his with her arm relaxed on his thigh.
When he lowered his arm from the back of the couch and slid it around her shoulders, she wriggled closer. He hadn’t been sure how open Bri wanted to be about what they’d discussed last night, but she was making it damn clear who she belonged to and that was alright by him.
‘Let me stick this in my place,’ Gus said, holding up the envelope. ‘I’ll write you a receipt.’
Gus dashed out and pulled the door over but didn’t close it. ‘I was supposed to come and pick you up, Doll.’
‘I thought that you might want to keep business and pleasure separate,’ she said, turning her body into his so that her breasts were pressed into his ribs.
‘You show up looking like you do and all a guy thinks about is pleasure.’
‘Is Gus ok with this?’ she asked.
‘Gus still likes to watch when his brother is humiliated, so yeah, he’s fine with it.’
‘Humiliated?’ she said and he regretted his choice of words. ‘I don’t want to upset Mattie. I’ve already got people after me, I don’t need to add to that.’
‘Have you had any more trouble that I should know about?’ he asked, touching a shining strand of hair that coiled over her shoulder.
‘That you should know about? No.’
‘I don’t like that distinction,’ he said, noting how she was facing him but managed to avoid eye contact. ‘Tell me.’
‘Marshall called,’ she exhaled. ‘Gary heard that… I’ve been made at the club.’
If that were the trouble she was worried about, then he could breathe a sigh of relief. ‘You’re safe at the club,’ he said. ‘I pay security well to make sure all of my girls are safe. But I’ll put word out that they should keep a special eye on you.’
‘To make me different from the others? They already think that you show favouritism toward me.’
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