by Joyce Alec
"My lord, my apologies for keeping you," Alice was wearing a deep blue pelisse which only served to enhance her skin tone and her reddish hair. He couldn't take his eyes off her.
"It seems the late duchess and I have a similar build. As there is a little nip in the air, Jarvis insisted that I wear this, so I do not catch a chill."
Faith seemed a little hesitant to wear such a fine piece of clothing, but Edmund was too enraptured by her beauty to notice. He proffered his arm and escorted her to the chaise. The duke had decided to join them, to act as chaperone. He didn't wish the young lady's family to think he wasn't taking care of her reputation.
Edmund addressed Faith, "I have asked the duke if I may escort you to Almack's this week…"
The duke interrupted Edmund, "I do not feel it would be fitting for your family to come upon you at a party, my dear," the duke smiled at her as he sat across from her.
"Here we are, along the ladies mile. Does this look familiar to you?" Edmund asked, but Faith was perplexed as they passed other carriages and greeted their occupiers.
While it was still early days in the Season, the young lady with the duke and the marquess was causing quite a stir. Edmund was one of the more sought-after young men of the ton. He thought it strange that before his elevation to the duke's heir, mothers had taken little notice of him, whereas now invitations were coming fast and furiously. It pleased the duke that he'd find his heir a wife. A man in a responsible position needed a good woman. A wife was missing from Edmund's life.
"Driver, stop," the duke called out. When the carriage came to a halt, he said, "Go for a walk, you two."
"His Grace isn't very subtle, is he?" Edmund said as he walked alongside Alice.
"You and he have been very courteous, and I am very grateful for the hospitality. I only wish I could remember."
Alice looked away as a tear came to her eye. Why couldn't she remember? And why wasn't anyone looking for her? It didn't seem possible that she would be in London for the Season and be alone. Young ladies were never left alone.
"As I know nothing of my own life, tell me about yours, my lord. I take it you are not promised to anyone," she asked. She didn't want him to have an arrangement with anyone.
"No, Miss Faith. Although I am essentially at His Grace's mercy at the present time, and I am sure he plans that by the end of the Season, I shall be betrothed. Somewhere in London is my future wife, perhaps she is here, in Hyde Park," he teased.
"I sense a great sadness in you, my lord, if you do not mind me saying so. You turn the most serious things into a joke," her observation took him off guard.
"Miss Faith, I have been thrust into a position I wasn't trained for. It hasn't been easy, although His Grace does not seem to understand that. You seem very secure within yourself and look very comfortable in our company. I am not so sure I would be the same if it were I who had the memory loss. Does it not scare you not to know who you are?"
"Ah, changing the subject. I do not feel afraid. I have faith in the Lord; I know that. I do not know specifics about myself, but I would not say that I am scared. I'm more curious. Tell me, my lord, do you often feel scared?"
"All the time, but in your company, your graciousness gives me a sense of calm," Edmund stopped, surprised at how forthcoming he was.
Usually, others told him their sob stories, and he stayed quiet, never feeling that he was worthy and therefore, accepting any kindness whether real or imagined that came his way. Alice was very different than the young women he usually spent time with. It didn't matter their class; the elite were husband-hunting and he was the grand prize, or the down-at-heel were looking for money. No, Miss Faith was very different indeed, he told himself. He felt secure in her company.
"You flatter me, my lord, but we do not know if this is the real me," she flashed a smile at him and his heart fluttered.
"I think losing one's memory reveals the true self. You do not know your fears, and therefore, they hold no power over you." Edmund fell silent as a dashing young man approached them.
"Muddy, my dear friend, where have you been?" the man tipped his hat at Alice, "And please introduce me to your lovely companion."
"Not now Bosley, His Grace is not far behind. It's the first day I've been out in ages. May I introduce, Miss Faith? This is Jonathan Landslow, Earl of Bosley. Well, we'd better be heading back now."
"It's a pleasure. I haven't seen you before."
"It's a long story, my lord," Alice said.
"Muddy, are you coming to Almack's? I believe it's to be a hoot this Season." Lord Bosley didn't take his eyes off Faith as he spoke to Edmund.
"We'll see. I bid you goodbye. His Grace is calling us back to the carriage. Good day, Bosley."
Lord Bosley watched them walk back to the duke, whose face was like thunder. The girl with Edmund looked very familiar, but he couldn't place her. Oh well, he thought, I am sure I will see her again this Season.
"Why does he call you Muddy?" Faith asked.
"We grew up together, and Muddy is from Edmund. Apparently, no one lets me grow up," Edmund looked at the duke as he spoke.
"Perhaps if you behaved like a gentleman, then that would change," the duke snapped at him.
Faith spoke, to calm the duke’s distress, "Well, it was wonderful to be out today. Thank you, gentlemen, you have been most kind to me. Your Grace, his Lordship told me how he came to be your heir. It is very sad. And with you losing your wife, very sad indeed. You are each other's family now. Isn't it wonderful that you have each other? Your Grace has so much wisdom to pass on, and you, my lord, need guidance so you can grow into your role. You must explain your needs to His Grace. Both of you learning from the other. That's all we ever need, isn't it, to belong. To know that someone is there to care about you."
The men looked at each other. She was right. They only had each other, and there she was, without a memory of who she was, calm and serene as they returned to Mayfair.
Would she be the facilitator to bring peace to the household? The duke had noticed how Edmund watched her. He seemed manlier in her company, and not because she was needy or weak in any way. It was her strength that she shared with Edmund. The duke felt it, too. She was so like his deceased wife in many ways. A man needed a woman like that. A woman who could gently steer without leading, who supported her husband with wise words. Even within the two days of her arrival, she had made an impact in the duke's home. He looked forward to seeing her, and had changed his habit of working before breakfast. He wanted to be in her company.
It hadn't escaped his notice how Edmund had moved away from Bosley, that wretched fellow, whom the duke believed responsible for Edmund's debauchery. Edmund's move was a protective one. He had stood between Miss Faith and Bosley, not that they were aware of it at the time, but the duke was an observant man. She was bringing about a change in Edmund too.
Jarvis had informed the duke that the man seeking restitution for Edmund's part in a serious matter was, in fact, a member of Bosley's household. It was a ruse and no doubt some matter that Bosley was mixed up in. The duke had never liked Bosley, nor indeed, his father before him. The duke never understood a man who wanted to succeed by causing upset to others.
4
Alice sat in her bedroom and emptied the contents of her purse. Edmond had already looked to see if there any reference to her name but there was nothing except for the necklace. She held it in her hands. It was a single strand coral necklace of the deepest red she had ever seen. There was a small Sevigne bow with a pearl at the center of the bow. She felt the necklace was significant but could not give it meaning.
Was it passed down through her family, or a trinket she had bought for herself? Had it fallen off her and Edmund had placed it in her purse, or was it already in her purse? The clasp didn't appear to be broken. So many questions went unanswered. Surely, if her family was missing her, they would be scouring the haunts of young ladies. What did it mean? She had no idea if her memory would ever return.
>
It gave her a headache to think and not come up with any answers. It only served to upset her.
"So much for not being scared," she said to herself. She was afraid to remember, and she was afraid she would never remember.
She heard a gentle tap at the door and she put her necklace back in her purse. A young woman, who was newly promoted from kitchen maid to lady's maid, entered with garments in her arms.
"Miss Faith, His Grace has asked me to fit these dresses for you. He expects you for dinner at seven o’clock. I shall bring you some shoes and jewelry shortly, Miss."
"Oh my, these are rather splendid. Is he quite sure?" Alice asked out loud, but the poor maid wasn't sure how to answer her.
"Very well. Let's get started." Alice had to take charge.
Alice had to admit it was very exciting to be getting dressed for dinner. She welcomed the change of clothes.
"My dear, you look lovely. I'm afraid there's been a change of plans and Edmund shall take you to the theater. While it is not an ideal way for your family to find you, it may be the only way of finding out who you are. I feel that Edmund could do with a night out. I am sure you will keep him on the straight and narrow."
Alice felt excited at the prospect of a night out. There was every chance someone would know her. However, she knew that part of her was excited about seeing another side of Edmund. She enjoyed his company.
"Miss Faith, you look breathtaking." Edmund couldn't say any more.
It had been quiet that afternoon. As Alice had rested, the duke had called Edmund to his study.
"I think you should take Faith to the Theater Royal in Covent Garden."
The duke's command had taken Edmund by surprise. He was quite sure that Bosley had been seen. Was the duke testing him? Not quite sure how to react, Edmund decided to ask if His Grace would be accompanying them. The reply, for now, yes, the duke planned to attend the theater also, but was waiting on a business communiqué which required his attention.
"Don't look so shocked, Edmund. I am not without some understanding of a young person's need to mix with others. I am trusting you to take care of our guest. Now, do whatever preparations you need. Don't just stand there, young man, I have work to do."
Edmund's legs felt like jelly. Now he was convinced this was some sort of test. Nonetheless, Edmund was going out with a beautiful woman on his arm. He could allow himself to feel excited. She wasn't someone brought to him by Bosley, or one of his cohorts, nor was she seeking a husband. She had just appeared in his life. He would be the better for it.
Her little speech in the chaise must have made the duke think about his and Edmund's situation. Edmund knew it had stayed with him as he planned to seek the duke's guidance on his estate. He had noticed how more agreeable the duke had been since her arrival. He had heard the duke chuckle as he played pontoon with her and she had won. It wasn't something he had heard since his great aunt's passing.
There, Alice stood before him now, resplendent for an evening on the town. She smiled at him, and he felt he could do anything if she was by his side. He had never been in love before, but surely this was it, he told himself.
Jarvis helped him with his cap and hat, as he gave the duke's regrets, and wished them a pleasant time.
"This is rather nice," Edmund said as the door of the carriage closed, "some people I know will be there, and you can make their acquaintance. If you are feeling up to it, we could perhaps go for a late supper following the show."
He felt so nervous asking her that he couldn't bring himself to look directly at her.
"That would be very pleasant, thank you, my lord."
Alice was feeling good. She felt for sure that someone was bound to know her, although it would mean leaving the duke and the marquess. She felt so at home in their company.
As they were a little late, they were shown directly to their seats. Alice looked around hoping that someone would look familiar to her, but as the players arrived on stage, she became mesmerized by the actors. She gasped with awe as the story was unveiled and Edmund was amazed at the effect the play was having on her. Usually, attendance was to see and be seen with very little attention given to the performance. She really was like a child, fascinated by the charm of the theater.
At the intermission, they mingled in the foyer making polite conversation. Unaware of the commotion they were causing, Edmund continued to introduce Alice as Miss Faith. Gossip had been rife since their ride in Hyde Park, and the mystery of exactly who was Edmund's lady friend had taken society by storm. Bosley approached them. He was very curious about the woman. Where had Edmund found her?
"We meet again, Miss Faith," he took her hand and kissed it as he bowed. She could feel herself blushing as she curtsied.
"Muddy, we're going to Madigans after. Bring Miss Faith. I didn't catch your last name…" Bosley was interrupted by the gong signaling the start of the second half of the play.
Edmund didn't want Bosley anywhere near Alice. He wasn't quite sure why he felt this way. After all, he and Bosley were lifelong friends, but Bosley had a way of sullying anything that Edmund found first. It had started when Edmund wanted a pony. Bosley's father had purchased the pony instead. When Edmund got a dog, Bosley claimed the dog had bitten him and Edmund never saw the dog again. It was curious how Edmund never noticed how Bosley took what he wanted until now. It was done so subtly that he found he berated himself for thinking such a thing when Bosley always included him on his trips.
Edmund had lost his heart to a young girl. They were just teenagers at the time and Bosley promised to intercede on his behalf. Edmund was quite boring when compared with Bosley, who was very dynamic in his personality. Edmund never stood a chance while Bosley was around. Whatever he wanted, Bosley was sure to take it from him. Bosley wasn't good enough for Miss Faith. Edmund decided they would have to avoid Bosley.
"I do not think it wise to go for supper. I am sure we can get something at home," he whispered to Alice.
"If you feel that is best," Alice said. Her head was quite sore after meeting so many people, and she searched her mind for recognition, but there was nothing.
A messenger came to Edmund, and he excused himself.
"My lord, His Grace, the Duke of Donningford, has taken ill. Your presence is required immediately. We can send the young lady home. It might best if you left immediately," the man said solemnly.
Edmund was torn. He needed to go to the duke. It would be a pity to disturb Miss Faith's enjoyment of the play. She wasn't family and it may not do well to stress her.
"Very well. She is to be brought to the duke's immediately after the performance," Edmund gave the man money to ensure his instructions would be carried out and left the theater, feeling guilty about leaving Alice unattended.
He failed to notice Bosley lurking in the shadows, and once Edmund was gone, Bosley gave the man some money and he slipped into the theater to watch Alice, who didn't seem to notice Edmund was gone. As the curtain fell, Alice dried her eyes. She had found the performance played with her emotions and as she turned to speak to Edmund, only then realized he was missing.
She looked around, but all she saw were the theater goers milling out. She felt very lonely, even though she wasn't alone. It was the strangest sensation, and not one she had felt before, despite not knowing who she was.
"Miss Faith. Muddy gives his apologies. He was called away and asked me to see you home. I thought if you were up for it, we might go to Madigans for a light supper." Bosley was very polite as he spoke.
While feeling unsure about him, Alice had no option but to agree to take his arm. She had no money, and in fact, only had a vague awareness of where the duke's home was. She didn't know why Bosley bothered her, but they would be among others so how bad could it be. It must have been very important for Edmund to leave her by herself.
"I thought we were going with others," she asked when they seemed to be alone.
"They've gone on. We can walk from here if you do not mind.
I have to say, I'm rather intrigued by you, Miss Faith. I do feel there is something familiar about you, but cannot quite put my finger on it. Where do you come from? Muddy never gave me your family name."
"Why do you call him Muddy?"
"It's a nickname; that's all. Also, he can be a stick in the mud sometimes, so I feel it rather suits him," Bosley snorted.
"I thought you too were supposed to be friends. It doesn't sound very nice to talk about Lord Cholmosley in that way," Alice was annoyed.
"Forget about him. Who are you Miss Faith?"
Part of her didn't want to answer him.
"I don't know who I am. I had an accident and cannot remember."
Bosley smirked.
"Isn't that interesting? You have absolutely no idea of who you are. Then we must make you attend Almack's next week. That's where the real party is, and anyone who is anyone will be there. I'll help Muddy find you a home. Ah, here we are," Bosley opened the door of a grubby little place.
Alice felt unwell as the smells hit her. They seemed familiar, but how could they, she asked herself. She asked Bosley to take her home, but he ignored her, saying he wanted to show her a good time that Edmund would never be inclined to do.
As the drinks flowed, Alice could only watch as the elite became more raucous. She hated being there. Bosley was getting too familiar with her.
"Do you think you're too good for me, Miss Faith, or whatever your name is? Are you sure we haven't met before?"
She blinked as the smell of alcohol hit her face and she closed her eyes, praying that the Lord would save her. She didn't want to be here at all. Bosley was getting annoyed with her for not drinking, and in his mind, not allowing herself to have fun. Why was she so boring? Had she already spent too much time with Edmund?
"I had to teach him how to drink and have a good time. Why aren't you having a good time?" he said as he spilled his drink on her. He took out his handkerchief to wipe Alice's dress. She felt so afraid, so unsure of what to do.