I carefully lift my water glass to my lips. The waitress overfilled it and with the way my hand is shaking I’m lucky when I don’t spill it all over myself. The ice cubes clink against the glass as I set it back down on the table.
“This is the first date I’ve been on with someone other than Christopher,” I confess.
He doesn’t react. He just sits there his light blue eyes calmly studying me before asking, “You’ve never been out with anyone else?”
I shake my head and press my lips together.
The waitress brings our entrees, placing them down in front of us, before disappearing as quickly as she appeared. I appreciate the momentary break from the conversation, but I know I need to make him understand I’m not like most women my age.
“I grew up really sheltered. I skipped some grades which made it difficult to form lasting friendships.” I smooth my napkin out in my lap.
Zack listens attentively as I give him a brief rundown of my unconventional education. The good, the bad, and the ugly. When I finish, I take a bite of my dinner, chewing it slowly as I compose my thoughts.
“I’m sorry. Childhood can be the loneliest time in your life. You’re surrounded by other kids, but still all alone.” He studies me for a moment. “When did you meet Christopher?”
“I was twenty years old and working on my Ph.D. when I met him. No one had ever expressed any real interest in me before.” I lift my eyes from my plate and find his gaze on me.
“He was your first boyfriend?” He raises an eyebrow.
I nod my head. “He was my first everything.”
Chapter Eleven
Zack
Fuck. How am I supposed to compete? Firsts are hard to forget. I don’t say anything, I just focus on my meal and quietly seethe this guy owns all of hers. There must be something I can do she’s never done before.
“What’s the riskiest thing you’ve ever done?” I ask.
She smiles. “Coming on this date with you,” she answers.
“You don’t really mean that do you?” I ask, unconvinced she’s serious.
She nods. “I wasn’t kidding when I said I grew up sheltered and taking risks has never really been my thing.”
“What about moving here? That was risky, I’m sure,” I mention.
“Not risky; just necessary for my peace of mind. This date feels riskier to me.”
“Well then, I guess I better think of something we can do to make sure this date lives up to your expectations. I don’t want to disappoint you.”
“I don’t think you could. You’re already so good at reading me and making me feel better.” She smiles. “I’m not sure how you’ve remained single. I’m sure there are a lot of ladies who wanted to be your girlfriend.” Her cheeks flush pink and her eyes lower to her plate.
“I’ve been busy with work and other things. I’ve never had time to be in a relationship, until now.”
Her eyes flick up to mine full of questions she wants answers to, but doesn’t want to ask.
“I like you, Lana. I have fun with you and I think you’re beautiful - inside and out.” I pause our gazes locked.
I can see the insecurity she feels and the hope my words are bringing her at a stalemate. Which one will win out? “I’d like to keep taking you out and see where this attraction we have goes.” I lean forward. “Unless this attraction is all one sided and you don’t feel it too. Tell me I’m not imagining it.”
She stares at her water glass, her finger trailing through the condensation built up on the outside.
“Lana, look at me.” Her eyes timidly lift to meet mine. “Why are you retreating on me? I thought we were friends.”
She inhales a deep breath and lets out a big sigh. “We are friends. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t attracted to you also.” She covers her eyes with her hand for a moment before placing it back down on the table. “I’m not good at this,” she whispers. Her eyes dart around the dimly lit space, looking at anything but me.
“Not good at what?” I ask.
“This.” She gestures between us. “I’m not good at talking about things involving feelings. I’m not good at talking to guys, period.”
Her fingers nervously play with the spoon on the white tablecloth, beside her plate. I cover her hand with mine. “I don’t care how you do talking to other guys, Lana. I only care how you are with me and so far, we’ve had no problems. Being with you is fun and easy.” My thumb soothingly brushes over the back of her hand. “Don’t over think things and make it awkward. There’s no reason for it. We already know each other pretty well.”
We eat the rest of our meal with no more awkwardness between us. Lana just needed to get out of her head and stop over analyzing everything. As soon as she did, our usual comfortable vibe returned.
Once the waitress clears away the dishes and leaves our bill. I stand behind Lana and help her with her coat, always the gentleman. I rest my cheek on hers and whisper in her ear. “We’re going to leave without paying the bill.”
“What?” her whisper is harsh. She tries to shake her head but my cheek is pressed tightly to hers. “We can’t.”
I squeeze both her shoulders with my hands. “Just follow my lead. It will be fine.”
I take her hand in mine and walk through the dining room as if there’s nothing wrong. She clings to my arm, the nails on her other hand digging in. I like it, I’m not going to lie. Since the day I lost my virginity, I’ve known I’m a fan of pain with my pleasure. There’s nothing I’d like better than to end tonight buried nine inches deep inside her sweet pussy with her nails raking deep furrows down my spine. I’ll take any pain she can give me. Just thinking about it has my dick at half-mast. That might not be how tonight’s going to play out though. Rushing Lana would be a big mistake. She’s not that kind of girl and if we have sex she might regret it.
I am hoping for a kiss at the end of the night. I can’t wait to feel her lips under mine.
Soon there will be no secrets between us.
Chapter Twelve
Lana
Oh, my God, I’m going to jail.
His warm hand tugs me along beside him. I try to school my features so I don’t look guilty, but I feel like everyone who looks at me can tell we just chewed and screwed.
With each step, my heart pounds at an accelerated pace. I hold my breath until we’re safely out the door, convinced we wouldn’t make it outside without someone shouting “stop thief.”
I don’t breathe easily until we’re in his vehicle. The dark, tinted windows keep people from seeing inside.
I lay my head back against the leather seat and close my eyes. When I expel a large sigh, Zack chuckles from the driver’s seat.
My eyes flip open as I cast a glance his way. “You think this is funny, don’t you?” I try to sound stern, but I bite on my bottom lip to keep from laughing at the absurdity of it all.
“You’re adorable.” He flicks my nose with the tip of his index finger. “A criminal mastermind you’ll never be, but I think I’ll keep you around anyway.” He winks at me and my stomach whirls. He’s so attractive it intimidates me and turns me on at the same time.
After a few minutes, Zack breaks the silence. “I can practically hear you thinking.” His gaze briefly flicks to me and he smiles. “I left money under my plate for the bill.” He smirks.
“Zack,” I shout. “I was sitting here feeling guilty and worried we were going to hell.” She giggles.
“Nope, no blemishes on your record. Mine is another story, but at least you don’t have to worry about your soul being damned for what we did tonight.”
Zack drives me straight home and holds my hand as we walk up the stairs next to each other. When we arrive at my door he turns to me. “Do you mind if we continue on with our date? I’m not ready to say goodbye to you yet.” His blue eyes sparkle as they stare down at me.
How can I say no to him?
“Sure, do you want to come in?” I ask, reaching in my pocket for my key
s.
“I’d like that.” He runs the back of his fingers down my cheek, stealing my breath for a moment. He’s dangerous. One small touch from him and I turn brainless, incapable of the smallest task.
I mentally shake my head. Snap out of it. He’s just a guy, albeit a gorgeous one.
I shove the key in the lock, opening my door. He follows me inside, pushing it closed behind us. I immediately kick my heels off. “Would you like some wine? I have a new bottle I’ve been wanting to open.”
“Yes, I would, but I’ll get it. You go get comfortable and I’ll take care of the rest.”
I remove my wool coat, hanging it on the coat rack just inside the entrance. “Are you sure? Give me a yell if you don’t know where something is.” Walking into the living room, I head over to the Christmas tree. Every night I lie on the floor and stare up at the lights. I like the way they reflect on the white ceiling. Judging by the amount of pine needles that have fallen to the floor, it’s time to take it down, but I’ll miss it when it’s gone.
I shut the lights in the living room off and spread my thick, fleece blanket out on the floor next to the tree. Grabbing two large pillows off the couch, I situate them side by side and settle back against one.
It’s only a minute more until Zack is standing beside me, holding my wine glass out. His coat and tie are gone and the top two buttons of his shirt are undone. He looks even sexier than he did all buttoned up. I sit up, grab the glass from his grasp, and tip the chilled liquid back. I drink it down in three large gulps, settling back down on my pillow while Zack laughs.
“What?” I ask.
He smiles at me, sinking down to the blanket. “I’ve never seen you drink that fast before.” He runs his fingers through his hair. “Are you nervous to be alone with me?”
My head rocks back and forth on the pillow as I shake it. “No, not at all. I just didn’t feel like holding it.” And you’re so gorgeous, I want to tear your clothes off.
He lets out a chuckle, before lying down next to me on the blanket. “Where’s your wine?” I ask, noticing his lack of.
“I’m not in the mood for wine, but I didn’t want you to feel like you couldn’t have some.”
I turn my head and glance at him beside me on the blanket. Is this what it would be like to lie beside him in my bed? I want to know and it scares me. I haven’t had sex with someone besides Christopher and my instincts tell me being with Zack would be completely different.
At least I’m not a virgin. I remember how nervous I was the first time Christopher and I made love.
THREE YEARS AGO
“Relax darling.” Christopher brushes his lips against mine. “Nothing will happen unless you want it to.” His lips slide down to kiss my neck and I remind myself to relax. My fingers clutch his hair as his head moves down and I gasp when his lips close around a nipple. His fingers softly trail down my stomach and my hips raise to meet them when they slide through my slit. He pushes two fingers inside me and I moan. I want him. I want this to happen tonight. We’ve been together for six months now and he’s been more than patient with me and my old-fashioned ways. I know it can’t have been easy for him to hold out this long, but he’s never pressured me. Not that we haven’t done other things, because we have. We’ve done it all and I’ve loved it. I know this will be no different.
Giving him my virginity is the last thing holding me back. It’s the final piece of me I can give him. He already owns my heart and the thought of him having this too scares me. If he ever left me it would destroy me, but I know he wouldn’t. That’s not who he is.
Every day he shows me he loves me and I’m confident he always will.
His thumb circles my clit and then brushes back and forth over it. “Christopher, please,” I moan squeezing my eyes shut.
“Are you in a rush darling?” he questions as my hips rock against his hand.
“Yes, I want you. Please,” I beg. His fingers briefly leave me as I hear the condom wrapper tearing. My eyes fly open when I feel the head of his cock pressing against my opening. I watch his face as he slides a little inside me. His eyes meet mine as he lowers his chest down, resting on his elbows. “Are you sure about this? I don’t want you to regret this.”
Nodding, I cup his face with my hands and smile. “I’m sure about us. Kiss me and make me yours.” He groans and seals his mouth over mine. Our tongues rub together as he pushes the rest of the way inside me. I cry out with an unintelligible sound. He keeps kissing me to distract me.
The pain is intense and my vagina feels like it’s on fire. I grip his hair, tugging hard. I don’t mean to deliberately hurt him, it’s more of a reflex.
He pulls his mouth from mine. “Are you okay, darling?” He lowers his forehead to mine.
“Yeah, I’m not going to lie, it hurts. I think you just split me in two.” He chuckles and rubs his nose over mine. “I guarantee you’re still in one piece. I’m going to move now.” He brushes his lips over mine.
“Let me know if it’s too much for you.” His hips pull back and I breathe a sigh of relief. I mentally cringe as I wait for him to push back inside me. One thing’s for certain, this is going to be painful. I’m pleasantly surprised when it’s not as bad and the more he moves the better I start to feel. When his thumb begins to rub my clit, I moan and grab onto his shoulders. I push my hips up to meet his thrusts, and he takes my lips in a passion filled kiss.
Every inch of us is connected and I’ve never felt closer to him.
* * *
Our gazes are locked as we lie here on my fleece blanket. The lights from the Christmas tree reflect in his eyes and over the masculine angles of his face.
He rolls over on his side, propping his head up on his fist. His other hand caresses over my shoulder, before gently cupping the front of my neck.
He stares into my eyes as if he’s waiting for me to stop him, but I’m not going to. I’m tired of being afraid. I’m ready to see where this is going.
He applies pressure to my neck. Is he testing me? Fear runs through me. Is he going to choke me to death? My mind races for a moment. This is Zack. He wouldn’t do anything like that. He’s never given me any reason to fear him. I force myself to hold still.
His eyes flash their approval at me. “Good girl.”
I flush from his praise. I like pleasing him.
His hand slides up to briefly cup my chin before his index finger sensually traces the outer shape of my mouth. When he moves to the seam of my lips, my tongue licks the pad of his finger. Desire flares in his eyes and then his lips are on mine. There’s no tentative exploration of a first kiss. This is a teeth clashing, hair pulling, tongue dueling kiss. I can’t ever remember being kissed like this before. I can barely breathe, he’s devouring me. His mouth so tight against mine, his chest crashes into me, pushing me onto my back. My heart is pounding so fast it might explode.
He rolls over between my legs and I can feel his cock against me. Pressing me into the floor with the weight of his body, he’s everywhere. Instead of being panicked or feeling claustrophobic like I should; I’m excited by the unknown.
His beard is soft against the skin of my forehead as he trails kisses across the width and down the side of my temple. I wonder what that hair would feel like against my nipples or the inside of my thighs? I want to know. I need to know, but I’ve never been that kind of girl. I sink my fingers in his thick hair and pull him back to my mouth. I need his lips on mine to stop all the doubts from taking over. It doesn’t matter what kind of girl I used to be. I’m not her anymore and Christopher’s not coming back for me. I need to embrace this moment and forget about everything but Zack.
Chapter Thirteen
Zack
I’m in a tailspin right now. Kissing Lana is even better than I imagined and now all I can think of is how I can get my cock inside her as soon as possible. I don’t want to rush her, but fuck, it’s been almost eight weeks since we officially met and almost fourteen weeks since I first saw her at Quake
. I’m a patient man, but goddamn, no one’s that patient. A saint I’ll never be, especially tonight. I’m done fucking waiting. She wants it and I’m going to give it to her. I’ll make her forget Christopher ever existed.
Her hands tug on my hair and she’s rougher than I imagined she’d be. I like it. I think my precious angel is going to be full of surprises. That’s not all she’s going to be full of.
My hand slips inside the neckline of her dress and the lace of her bra is rough against my palm when I cup her breast. My other hand slides down over the slight curve of her hip, continuing on until I reach her hose covered legs.
I pull my lips from hers. I want to watch her reaction to my touch. My fingers skate up her leg taking her dress with them. I pause at the top of her thigh, tracing around the lacy edge with my fingertips. Her breath hitches. I slowly push the hose down until it’s completely off. I move to her other leg and her eyes close when my fingertips tease around the edge of her hose. I pull it slowly off, my lips trailing kisses down her calf. We’re only just beginning angel.
I kneel between her legs and push her dress up until she raises her arms over her head to help me. My eyes reverently trace over every inch of her. She’s a fucking goddess. A siren luring me in with every rise and fall of her chest, with every sigh, with every fucking thing she does.
I unclasp the front enclosure of her bra, holding my breath as I push the cups apart. My breath leaves me in a rush when the sheer perfection of her tits is revealed. Her fair skin is flawless, completely unblemished. Her tits are what wet dreams are made of. Full, round handfuls of perfection with taut pink nipples.
“Goddamn, you’re gorgeous.” I whisper in her ear, then suck her earlobe between my lips. The urge to bite is overwhelming, I fight against it. I know I should curb my tendencies to cause my partner pain. She’s not ready for that yet.
The Complete Quake Series Page 44