by Lyla Grace
“You know they hate me, blame me for it.”
“No, Cody. No one blames you, except you. It was an accident. It wasn’t anyone’s fault.”
He looks at me, his face is a bright red, tears are welling in his eyes, and there is a sadness surrounding him as though the world is about to cave in on him. "Oh God, Carter, I am so sorry, for all of it. Luke, what I've done to you. Oh, God, help me."
He falls to his knees, sobs racking his body. I kneel next to him, my arm around him. “Let me help you, Code. Let’s get you into treatment. Beat this shit once and for all.”
“You want to help me?” he asks.
"Of course I do, man. You're my brother - from the same mother."
“You’re an idiot,” he laughs.
“That too. So, what do you say?” I ask.
“Let’s do this,” he replies. He grabs me and pulls me into a hug. “Thanks, Carter.”
Together, as brothers, we make our way into the house. My parents had watched everything that transpired, but because of the distance, they have no clue what exactly was said. So we sit down, together, and tell them the whole sordid truth — the accident, the video, the guilt - every last detail.
“Carter says he can get me into a program, he’ll help me,” Cody says.
“Carter has enough going on, we’ll take care of this,” my father says.
"No. He's my brother; I am going to be by his side every step of the way. Besides, at this point, what else do I have to do." It's meant to be a joke, but out of the corner of my eye, I see Cody hang his head. "I didn't mean it like that Cody. All this shit is going to blow over. You'll see."
I know it will, most of it anyway. It's the getting Lexie back part that worries me most. I can't lose her. I won't. Unfortunately, she won't respond to any of my texts. So, while Cody and my parents chat, I shoot one last attempt over to her.
Me: I’m not giving up. There is something I need to do, and then I am coming for you. I love you, Lexie.
Even with that admission, she doesn’t reply.
I make a few phone calls. I need to find a suitable treatment program for Cody, no I need to find the best one.
“Hello?” the voice on the other end of the phone says.
“Hey, Landon, it’s Carter.”
“Speak of the devil,” he laughs.
“What is that supposed to mean?” I ask.
“Liv and I were just talking about you and your friend. The Coach’s daughter, man? Really? What the hell were you thinking?”
“To start, I didn’t know who she was.”
“But I’m guessing she knew exactly who you were.”
“She did. Believe me; I was pissed when I first found out. But…”
"But what? Carter, even if Coach is okay with you dating his daughter if he finds out that she's the…" Landon trails off.
“He already knows,” I tell him.
"Holy shit. What did Coach Masterson say?"
“Can we talk about that later. I need your help, bad.”
“Okay….”
“You and Liv do a lot of charity work, know a lot of people, right?”
“Yeah, why?”
"It's Cody. He uh, he's using again."
“I’m sorry, man.”
"I think he's serious about cleaning up this time though. I want to make sure I get him into a good program. The best program. I thought maybe you would have some suggestions."
“Let me make some calls,” he tells me.
“Thanks, Landon.”
“No problem. Hey, Carter…”
“Yeah?”
"You can always call if you need anything. If you have any questions about sex tapes, you might want to call Chase instead."
“Fuck you, Sutton,” I laugh as I hang up the phone.
I swear the man has connections that someone like me can only dream. He calls me back an hour later, arrangements made, there is a bed waiting for him, and Cody can go in whenever he is ready. The best part is that it's only an hour away from my parents which will make it easier for them to visit.
“It’s all set,” I tell Cody when I walk back into the living room.
“I don’t know what to say,” Cody replies.
“You don’t have to say anything. Just get better and get home. I need my brother back,” I tell him. “I’ll drive you there, first thing tomorrow.”
"I appreciate it, man, but no. Mom and dad can drive me. I've already created enough of a mess for you. You don't have…"
“Cody, stop. I want to do this. I don’t care about the press or any of that stuff. I am going to be by your side. End of story.”
“I don’t deserve to have you as a brother,” Cody says.
“True. But I got stuck with you, so…”
Cody gives me a playful push.
“Uncle Cody, Uncle Carter,” Luke shouts as Char brings him into the house.
I can see Cody’s body tense.
Covering for him, I squat down to Luke’s level and give him a fist bump. “Hey, bud, what’s up?”
“Mom said Uncle Cody is going on a trip for a while, so I wanted to say good-bye,” Luke says.
I nod and look back at Cody. He stands there, rocking from foot to foot. He takes a deep breath and walks over to Luke. "Actually, Bud, I uh… I have a problem. I'm…"
“Sick,” Char supplies.
"Sick. And I have to go someplace where the people there will help make me all better. That way I don't do bad things anymore," Cody tries to explain.
“You don’t do bad things, Uncle Cody.”
"If I weren't sick, you wouldn't have gotten hurt buddy. You wouldn't…"
“I jumped off the top of the swing set instead of going down the slide like you told me too. It’s my fault,” Luke says.
My heart breaks, watching the sight before me. Char is crying, my mom is crying, and Cody is crying. There is nothing for me to do but join them.
"This isn't your fault, Cody," Char says. "It isn't anyone's fault." She wraps her arms around Cody. "It was just an accident, Cody. A horrible accident. Why didn't you tell me you felt that way? I could have told you… " her voice trails off. "Things could have…"
“Rock bottom, sis. I had to hit rock bottom.” He looks at me. “And knowing that I hurt both of my best friends, that was it. I’m going to do this. I’m going to get better.”
“You better, we need you,” she says.
Cody and I spend the better part of the night in his room, packing up some of his stuff and talking. For the first time in years, I feel like I have my brother back. Despite everything wrong lately, this feels so good.
"So, Lexie had this idea, and I think I'm going to run with it. But, I'm going to need your help," I tell him.
“You know I’ll do whatever I can for you,” Cody replies. “I can talk to Lexie, apologize. See if maybe I can make her understand…”
I shake my head. “No, that’s not it. That’s not why she left.”
“You’re in love with her, aren’t you?”
“Like a damn idiot, yep.” I run my hand through my hair. “Fuck. She’s the last person I should have feelings for, but I have never felt this way about anyone before.”
“Not even Savannah?”
I laugh at the thought. I had been in love with Savannah, made a damn fool out of myself for her. What I feel for Lexie is so much more. “Not even close.”
“For what it’s worth, I hope things work out.”
“Me too.”
“So what’s this genius idea she came up with?” Cody asks.
I start telling him about the sports league for disabled children and the variety of programs I want to implement. I’m going to need someone with his sports knowledge to help me. Hopefully, I can convince Lexie to help, too. After all, it was her idea.
“What about you, Cody? Any love interests?” I ask.
“You don’t even want to know,” he laughs. “But all that’s over now. I need to focus on me. On us. That’s what’s
important.”
I see something on his nightstand, something familiar. I would know the jewelry piece anywhere; it was one of a kind.
“Christ, you were screwing Savannah, weren’t you?” I pick up a football of the dresser and throw it at him. “God, you really are a dick.”
He shrugs. "Not sure why you were all gung-ho about her. You are better off with Lexie."
“You better not have any firsthand knowledge of that. I swear to God Code, I will…”
“Relax man. I never laid a finger on Lexie. I just watched the video. A lot.”
We both pause and then burst out laughing.
“Who the hell knew you had that in you?” Cody laughs. “Sex in public man? You’re smarter than that.”
“Maybe, but she knows how to push all my buttons… at once,” I admit.
Lexie will be my undoing. And that is fine with me.
∆ ∆ ∆
Morning comes, and Cody and I head out to the treatment facility. It's a nice place, sounds like the program is good, and Cody seems interested.
We’re unpacking some things and getting him settled in his room when a stern-looking woman walks in.
"It's time for you to go Mr. Wallace. Just because your friends with Landon does not mean you or your brother get special permissions. We have a program to run here, and all participants must follow the rules." She stands in the door, the look on her face encouraging me to leave.
“Can we have a minute, alone, to say good-bye?” I ask.
She looks at me harshly before nodding her head and leaving the room.
“Looks like this is it,” I tell Cody.
He scrubs his hand over his face. "Thank you for this. For all of it- you forgiving me and…"
“I haven’t forgiven you yet. You get clean and then we’re cool. Got it?”
“I won’t let you down,” he tells me.
Between the sound in his voice and the look in his eye, I know he won’t.
Chapter 16 – Lexie
“How is the new apartment?” Abbie asks.
“It’s nice,” I tell her as I unpack another box.
The past two weeks have been a whirlwind. After my dad came to Brantwood and whisked me away, I went home and immediately began looking for job opportunities. Anything that wasn't with the Knights. Sure enough, I found one. It just so happened to be in another state. A neighboring state, but another state, nonetheless.
I tried to look at it positively. It was going to be a fresh start for me, a way for me to get over Carter. Maybe one day, forgive my father. The ridiculous demands he made as we drove back to the city – you can't see Carter, you will not be able to complete his therapy, you will move back in with me, and the list goes on. I had made up my mind the minute he walked into that hospital room and demanded that I leave with him.
Enough is enough.
I have spent the better part of my life trying to please my father, make him proud of me. After we lost my mom, he changed. He became more distant. Less involved with me, more engaged with his players. So I got into sports medicine in an attempt to have something we could bond over, to prove to him that I was good enough.
I'm not the perfect daughter. I never claimed to be. He wasn't exactly the ideal father either though, but I never used that against him — not the way he did me.
So when the Spartans called saying they needed a trainer, I jumped at the chance. Not only did I get a job I wanted, but it was also for my dad's rival team. Now, I get to stick it to him twice.
“Carter stopped by yesterday,” Abbie tells me.
“He did?”
I don't know why I am surprised. The guy is nothing if not persistent. Since I left, he has called my phone no less than four times a day. He sends random messages telling me he loves and misses me — all with no sign of him giving up anytime soon.
"Yep. Even when the man is devastated, he's gorgeous."
Is she trying to torture me here? I know exactly how gorgeous every square inch of him is. Memories of us together flood my mind.
“Lexie,” Abbie shouts into the phone.
“Huh? What?”
She sighs. She is clearly irritated by my lack of focus on our conversation. "I said that I told him you moved."
“Why would you do that?” I ask.
When I left the other day, I asked her to tell him I'm not home. I didn't want him coming to look for me. The move, being without him, it was all hard enough on its own.
"Because he deserves the truth. You know, I don't understand why you haven't gotten back together with him. You're not working for the Knights; you're not talking to your dad. Why not just talk to him, work it out?"
“It’s complicated,” I tell her.
“Bullshit, Lex. You’re a chicken shit.”
“Bite me, Abbie. You don’t know anything about Carter and me or what is going on. By the way, thanks for being a friend and having my back.”
“I am your friend. For the record, I have your back. Just not when you’re wrong. I wouldn’t be a good friend if I didn’t tell you when you were making bad decisions.”
“Yeah, well, they’re mine to make,” I tell her before I hang up the phone.
She doesn’t understand. She wouldn’t even if I told her.
I know my dad. I know how he would act if he knew Carter and I were together. I can’t risk Carter’s career like that.
Chapter 17 – Carter
“You okay, man?” Landon asks as he takes a seat next to me on my patio.
“No, I’m not okay.”
I wait for the “told you so” that I know is on the tip of his tongue.
“That’s it?”
Huh? I whip my head in his direction. “What is that supposed to mean?”
He takes a swig of his beer. "It means that you're not okay and you're just going to wallow in self-pity rather than do something about it?"
“What the hell am I supposed to do? She’s ghosted me. She won’t answer her phone; I’ve damn near stalked every place I know she goes, then to top it off her best friend Abbie tells me that she’s moved. Took a job with the Spartans.”
“Have you thought about going there?” Chase suggests as he joins us.
“Yeah, but what good is it going to do if she doesn’t want to see me?”
“What about Coach?” Landon asks.
“What about him?” I reply, irritation laced in my voice.
"For starters," he replies. "Have you talked to him and told him how you really feel about Lexie? Ever think maybe he wants to see you prove yourself to him? Show that you love her? Just giving up…"
“I’m not giving up,” I shout.
“Really? Because that’s what it looks like to me,” Landon chimed in.
Fuckers.
What else am I supposed to do? I’ve done everything I can. It’s in her court now.
“You could always…” Chase begins.
"Could what?" I pry hoping to God that he has some advice that will lead me to Lexie.
“Get back on the horse,” he says. I give him a confused look. “Give Ashlynn a call.”
“Jesus, Chase, is that your answer for everything?” Landon laughs.
Chase shrugs. “From what you’ve told me? Yeah, she sounds like a pretty damn good answer to the blues,” he replies.
"Maybe for Landon. But the rest of us poor souls don't compare," I say. And maybe his suggestion was ludicrous, but it did make me feel a little better. I laughed for the first time in two weeks.
“Oh, come on. Drop that shit already,” Landon says.
“You can deny it all you want brother, but that girl is head over heels in love with you,” I tell him. “Believe me. I’m the one that had to hear about it every night.”
“Did she give details? Just how kinky is our little Landon?” Chase inquires.
“Christ no. And I sure as hell didn’t ask for any,” I say as I choke on my sip of beer.
"Why not just ask Livie?" Landon suggests. "Like that one
time, when I fucked her…"
“Do not use my sister's name and the word fuck in the same sentence,” Chase warns.
"Fuck, Livie," Landon moans out, causing Chase to punch him in the arm.
“You two are idiots,” I laugh.
A while later Callie and Livie show up with dinner. Looking around my patio at my friends, I can’t help but think of how well Lexie would fit in with them. How tonight, if she were here, would be the perfect night.
“Okay, we’re all here. What did you call us for?” Landon asks.
“Yeah, besides for us to give you shit about being a pussy and giving up on the woman you love,” Chase interjects.
Under normal circumstances, Callie is quick to scold Chase when he's acting like an ass. Not today though, which can only mean she agrees with him.
“I have something I want to run by you guys. A… proposition.”
Sure, I've got money. Enough to get this idea of Lexie's started, but not enough to sustain it. And I don't know the first thing about business. And Landon? That guy basically knows everything, he's got connections that you don't want to know the why or how behind, and he's a financial genius. He's got more money than I think even he knows how to spend. Still, here they are, living this simple happy life.
Chase and Callie are going to be instrumental as well. Chase is excellent at game planning and proficient in every sport imaginable. I'm going to need him to help me set up the different programs. And Callie? She is able to get anyone to do anything she wants with just a smile. It's why she's great at running the Charitable Giving Foundation at POSH. Her connections and expertise in non-profit organizations will be a huge help.
“Why do I get the impression that this has something to do with Lexie?” Livie replies.
“Because it does – sort of.”
“Sort of?” Landon replies.
“I’m I love with her. I need to get her back.”
“And this proposition… that would do it?” Callie asks.
"I don't know. It's worth a shot though, and it's for a good cause."
“I like good causes,” she says.
So, we sit down, and I start telling them my plan. How it was Lexie's idea, how I think it would work, and how I intend to make Lexie a considerable part of it so hopefully I can get her back.