“Stop looking so damn smug. I turned him down and I’d do the same to you.”
Liar, liar… I think we should deny her, Fear sung and I grinned.
“Then, I guess I know where not to go asking for it,” I said indifferently.
I loved that she squirmed and couldn’t hide that little stubborn gaze from me. “Asshole,” she muttered and slipped into her bedroom and my chuckle followed after her.
She came back thirty minutes later looking dejected and annoyed. “I’m hungry,” she admitted and I couldn’t help but crack another grin. So, her hunger was more important than her pride… I’d do well to remember that for the times I pissed her off in the future.
“I’m guessing you want me to make you something?” I asked. She looked away and nodded. “Say please and I will.”
She glared at me for the longest time, seeing if I was serious until she finally dropped her head in defeat and said, “Feed me, damn it…” She lifted her head up. “Please.”
“Okay.” I stood and walked into the kitchen. “But, come here. It’s time you learn ’cause I’m not going to keep feeding us.” I stopped abruptly when I realized how that sounded and she did too, so I wondered if she felt as weird as I felt. I no longer knew what this game with her was, but it felt more dangerous than ever before.
“Okay,” she answered quickly, almost shyly.
Yes, this was a very dangerous game. Her little meek voice was just as good as her spitfire temper—seemed Molly was just good all around.
Chapter Fourteen
Molly
Ryan stepped into my room and said, “I thought I told you to get dressed thirty minutes ago.”
I rolled over and glared. “Go away.”
He smirked. “Are you still mad about earlier?”
Yes, I was. You didn’t make fun of someone trying to learn to cook. I did not know oil shot up and attacked you like that. He told me to stick the sliced potatoes in the hot oil… and I did, and I was attacked. And I jumped when I was burned and dropped the potatoes I hadn’t yet put in there.
“I refuse to even try to learn to cook if you’re just going to make fun of me.”
He nodded. “Come on, I couldn’t help it,” he sounded pitiful and earnest, and damn it, I no longer felt mad about it. “If my sister learned how to cook, then I know you can.”
I sat up to a sitting position on the bed. “Your sister?” That’s right, he had a sister if I remembered correctly.
“Yeah, she’s human.”
“Is she still alive?” I asked surprised.
He nodded. “Yeah, she’s an old woman now, but yeah, she’s still kicking.” He leaned against the doorway. “And growing up, she couldn’t do anything for herself which was probably my fault. I might have spoiled her too much—she was my twin.”
I smiled, anxious to continue this conversation, feeling like he was opening up to me in some way by talking about his sister. “Do you go see her often?”
He shook his head and straightened himself back up. “No, she thinks I went onto my afterlife—ya know, Heaven. There’s no way I could tell her the truth of what I’ve become.” Then he raised his head and realized what he was telling me because his eyes got that startled look in them and he stepped out of the room. I climbed out of bed and followed him.
“And all this time, you’ve not even gone to see her?” I trailed behind him.
He sighed. “Of course I have.” He turned around to face me. “Penny would bring me and Grim’s wife, Melanie pictures of her over the years, including ones of my niece and nephew before Penny passed away, and I’ve also made my way into the human world to sneak a peek at them every now and then—”
“Penny?” I interrupted him.
“She was someone that stuck by my side despite everything I’d do,” he said sadly.
There was a lump in my throat the size of golf ball. For some reason, the thought of someone being there for him, making him have an expression like that as he thought of her, bothered me. “Sounds like you two were close.”
“We were,” he told me, then his eyes came together as he watched me. “Are you getting jealous again, Blue?” He drew closer and inhaled me over my shoulder.
I shuddered. “I’m not,” I said a little too defensively.
He leaned back and arched a brow, making a tsking sound. “What am I gonna do with you?”
“Any other women I should know about from your past?” The words were like dynamite forced off my tongue. I couldn’t even be ashamed I said them because in my head, Melanie’s beautiful face appeared telling me the answer I waited for.
“I don’t get attached to anybody,” was his answer and even then, I knew his answer was a lie. He didn’t know I knew he was in this dark place because of his love for Melanie. Now I wished I never thought about it, my chest squeezed—a sweet, beautiful ache, maybe the realest thing I’ve ever felt, and it was suffocating. I didn’t like it, I hated it, and I hated him for probably still loving her. “Your mood is murderous, Blue, why is that?” he teased me as he walked away from me.
I no longer knew which direction to save him or me anymore. I feared I was setting myself up for the biggest payback of all, and even though I knew I deserved this hurt I was walking into, I couldn’t help but want to reach up and pluck all others from his dark, dusty heart and place myself there…
And I’d call it home.
_____
“Don’t worry, Blue, I’m not sticking you in the cage tonight.” Ryan pressed his warm palm against my back and led me through the crowd at The Den and I let him, still drowning with dark and possessive thoughts. “I know you said something about asking if you wanted to be thrown in there, so I’ll give, only because the shit you’re feeding me right now is the best of the best… want to tell me why your emotions are so dark?” I chose not to answer.
Darrian weaved his way through the demons and moved in next to Ryan as we walked. Anyone could see that he came to Ryan like he was a little, pleased puppy, glad his owner was returning to make him happy—in Darrian’s case, Ryan helped fill his pockets from the bets and his whores… not anymore, if I had something to say about his hands on other women. “Are you sticking her in the cage again?” His eyes shot to me, sliding down the tight little black dress Ryan picked out for me. “She was a big hit; the crowd will be happy to have her back.”
Ryan stopped abruptly, so I did. He grabbed Darrian’s neck, surprising me and Darrian both. He wore Fear’s skin so he was already intimidating, but I’m sure it was worse when he was breathing down your neck. “What part of her are you looking at?” he asked him.
Darrian looked toward me then quickly averted his gaze. “Is there a problem with looking at her? I was just asking if she’d be fighting—”
“And that requires your gaze to trail down her body?”
“Fear—are you messing with me? You know everyone will be looking at her.” Darrian tipped his head toward me as Ryan gripped his neck and Ryan’s head turned.
“He’s right,” I told Ryan, scanning the crowd and trying to ignore the buzz coursing through my body at Ryan’s reaction to one demon looking at me—it wasn’t even one of lust. “You’re the one that dressed me to be looked at and now you want to get upset?” I let out a dramatic sigh and Ryan shoved Darrian away and wrapped his arm around my waist and all that buzzing I tried to ignore burned to the surface.
I couldn’t play off my desire as nothing when his breath fanned my neck as he leaned over and inhaled, taking it all in. I expected some sort of reply, but instead, he pushed us forward. Darrian studied us quietly as we left him rubbing his neck. A squeak escaped my throat as I felt something slithering up my leg. When I looked down, I saw that it was his tail.
He shoved my body into his and spoke into my ear as we walked, “Careful, Blue, you might end up drawing attention to yourself, and I don’t think you’d want that right now.” My entire body heated, from the tips of my toes to the hair on my head. His tail wrapped fur
ther up my leg and I was so bothered by it that Ryan was practically walking for the both of us.
All I knew was I had seconds to figure out how I should handle the situation. Was I really okay with him handling me this way when his horns and tail were out? “What’s wrong?” he whispered cruelly.
Oh, hell. I. Did. Not. Care.
I let him lead us toward the fights as his tail slid closer to my dress, closer to slipping between my thighs. He grabbed a seat, carried it while shoving through demons, and placed it a foot from the cage. He sat down and I stood anxious and wobbly next to him. He grabbed my wrist and pulled me down. “What—” I squeaked as I fell in his lap. What little was left of my hesitancy fizzled out with the hard press of his dick poking my ass.
I slumped back against him just as his tail weaseled its way further up my thigh. I clamped my legs shut, denying it any further access. He wrapped his arms around my stomach and arms and pressed his face into my back. I arched, his breath on my back alone made my body tingle. “What’s wrong?” he asked innocently like he had no clue. He was every bit the monster right now, proving the horns to be a nice touch to his scheme.
I placed my hands between my legs, shoving the thin black material between them like that would save me… I didn’t want it to save me. I studied his tail as it moved around my leg. It was black and thick… the same width of a dick, and smooth… I also knew he could change it into whatever he wanted. “I don’t know what you’re planning, but the tail is out,” I said, but I wondered why it didn’t sound convincing.
“You’re more worried about my tail than all the demons that’d watch?” I was shaking, his voice against my back was killing me. His hands moved over my hip bones where he pressed me into him desperately. “What was that? I think I heard a moan?” He bit into the exposed skin of my back and this time the sound did escape my mouth. I dropped my head in defeat. Why was it so easy to feel with him? Every orgasm I’ve ever had I’ve had to concentrate and work my body hard for, but with him, it already felt like it was about to be triggered when he hasn’t even started.
“You’re strangely quiet, Blue,” he added.
“What do you want me to say?” I whispered, head still hung in my lap.
“That you want me to fuck you with my tail.”
I was on fire, but the thought of admitting that was hard to swallow because that part belonged to Fear even if this was Ryan. I turned my head slightly even though I couldn’t see him since his face was pressed into my back. “This is really you, right… this isn’t Fear?”
He chuckled. “It’s me, but Fear’s right here inside my head, watching like the depraved monster he is.” One of his hands slid down my thigh. “If you don’t want to say it with words, all you have to do is open your legs,” he mumbled against my back.
He straightened his back out until his head was at my shoulder. I leaned my head back and closed my eyes, then I parted my legs shamefully. “Do you have to close your eyes to let the monster in?” His words did nothing but feed my lust. “I can’t be the only one that can smell your sex. I wonder how many are already watching us?” I wouldn’t let myself open my eyes. He put us front and center for a reason…
His tail slid up my leg, slipping between my legs, and when the tip of it pressed into my panties, my eyes shot open and I bit back the sounds I wanted to make. He wrapped one arm around my waist and used the other on my breasts. They weren’t big enough to palm, so he made use of my nipples and the fact that I wore no bra. They pebbled against the dress, all he had to do was pinch one between his fingers and I cried out. His tail rubbed against my clit and my senses were going crazy, then his tail slipped inside my panties. He bit the back of my neck and one of my straps fell off my shoulder. His hand left my nipple to force my legs open more, letting them dangle off both of his. The fighters in the ring could most likely see me if they’d take the time to look. I wiggled my shoulders, letting the strap down completely, revealing my breast, then I grabbed Ryan’s hands and placed it there, wanting his skin on mine. I panted and squirmed, but he placed the strap back on my shoulder and covered me back up. “None of them get to see any more of your skin.” His voice was raspy and beautiful when spoken through desire.
Without any warning, he pressed his tail inside me and his arms barricaded my body from moving whatsoever. The only thing I had control of was my head and I let it fall against him, and even then, he bit into my neck like he wanted control of that too. He moved it out, then back in, before he started moving it in every direction. It felt unbelievable, unrestricted to the ways of a man. I lifted my hips up when the orgasm hit me. I didn’t care that I cried out from the pleasure. He kept rubbing the same spot relentlessly to the point that my body was jerking, and then another one came.
And I came and came in such a short amount of time. “Ryan,” I pleaded and begged, over and over for it to be over or to never stop, I didn’t know. He was thrusting against me, caging me in with his arms as he ruined me with Fear’s tail. He slipped in deeper, but he sensed my body’s limit on how far he could take it and repeated his movements. My face was wet and I knew it was because my eyes were leaking. It couldn’t have been but a short amount of time that he’d been fucking me this way, but it had me unhinged—lost, falling into a place that might even have me beg Fear for it if this pleasure was ever taken from me.
“Fuck, Blue,” Ryan groaned. “You aren’t ever going to stop, are you?”
“No… don’t stop.”
“Molly.” someone called my name. “Molly.” Louder this time and that’s when I finally recognized my name. I lifted my head and stared at Timber standing a foot in front of me inside the ring. His expression was unrevealing, but my legs spread open and Ryan’s tail between my legs, revealed everything to him. I closed my legs quickly, lust draining from my body. Ryan gripped me tightly, he didn’t want to stop, and I tightened around his tail, wanting the same for him, but not anymore in this place.
Then he must have noticed Timber. His tail stopped but made no move to leave. Darrian stepped next to Timber nervously, obviously terrified to even disturb Ryan after earlier. “I know you said she wasn’t going to fight tonight,” he said, glancing toward Timber. “But he keeps insisting that she be added in this gang fight.”
Ryan blew against my neck and goose bumps spread over me. “You already know my answer.”
“It’s fine, I’ll join in,” I said quickly as I straightened out my throaty voice with a cough or two.
I couldn’t see his face to guess what he was thinking, but his arms gave around me and I stood, waiting for him to remove the tail. And he did, finally, slowly, deliberately trailing it down my leg, so that my desire glistened against my skin. I felt it drip onto my leg. I was wobbly on my feet, my body still wrapped in everything he’d just given me. I didn’t even look back, I was afraid to because I might have crawled right back onto his lap if I did.
Instead, I focused on Timber, letting his presence bring me back to who I really was. He was more focused on Ryan than me. By the time I entered the cage crawling with several disgusting demons, I felt more put together. I sucked in a breath and met Timber’s gaze from across the ring. He made his way to me. “I see you’re doing well for yourself.” I couldn’t tell if he was being condescending or not. Considering I had a tail in my vagina, I’d say he was. At one point in the past, I probably meant something to him, though… before I chose not to go back and save him. Even forgetting about him. “Since when were you so intimate with those that captured us? I don’t recall you enjoying the one from our past.”
I couldn’t remember if I had shared anything of my past with him. I trusted myself that I didn’t, though. I never gave secrets. “You know I can’t die… are you asking for a death wish?” I asked him.
He smirked. “I only have to kill you once and I’ll be named victor. I’m undefeated, you know that.”
I smiled. “I’m well fed right now; my recovery time is fast… fast enough for me to convince other
s that I was never dead.”
“You never play fair.” He yanked a sword off the cage and tossed it to me.
“When has life ever been fair to us?”
“When you put it that way…”
And the fight began, I took out two easily before getting thrown against the wall by another. Timber took care of him for me, though and I grinned in appreciation. We ended up sticking close to each other. “Takes me back,” he told me over his shoulder as I cut into a demon.
“We always did make a good team,” I told him.
Getting rid of the others wasn’t a problem for us and soon, it was down to just me and him. He circled around me, flipping his sword cockily, and I rolled my eyes. “I have to make you stay dead for a while… any pointers?” he asked with a smile.
I wasn’t a good person. I’ve done a lot of bad things in my time and I’ve only ever thought of myself, but Timber knew I wasn’t going to kill him. He had only one life, I had many.
But, even though I didn’t kill him, my presence did. I dropped my sword as the tail that had delivered my orgasms just minutes before ripped into Timber’s chest. Blood dripped out of his mouth and he met my eyes for the last time… his body fell at my feet, and Ryan stood in his place.
And it hit me, the boy I killed, the man I both needed to save and desperately wanted for my own, was already trading his soul with Fear’s. And maybe, in return, he was already giving his to Fear.
Chapter Fifteen
Ryan
Red was my vision.
Fear’s wrath was overlooked by my own. The werewolf’s body dropped to the floor and I still wasn’t satisfied. My vision was still bleeding. Several emotions ran through Molly as she watched what I did. She started out shocked and confused, then she saw that it was me and anger and fear clashed around her.
Falling For Fear (A Grim Awakening Book 4) Page 11