by Anna Scott
"What's wrong?" Total confusion had taken over. He hadn't called me. Suddenly I remembered that my phone had been on low battery the night before, and I hadn't plugged it in. When I allowed myself to think about it, I assumed that he hadn't called.
"Your house, you weren't, and your phone, you didn't, and no one knew where you were."
Trying to make sense of his rambling, I tried to explain, "My power went out, and I think my phone is dead."
"I know, but you were gone, and I couldn't get ahold of you, I thought something happened, that-"
"I went to my parents' house." My explanation was short and clipped. I felt the anger and maybe even a little resentment rise up in my stomach. This was a man who wanted everything from me, down to the smallest detail of my life but wasn't able to even let me talk to him about my concerns for him.
Letting out a relieved sigh, he leaned down bringing his mouth inches from mine and peered deep into my eyes.
"Amber, I fucked up last night, I made a huge mistake, I'm sorry. Please, can I kiss you?"
"What did you do?" If he was with another woman, though I couldn't imagine him doing that, we'd be over. That was one thing I could never abide by, and never had.
"I left you at home, alone. I was so defensive, so stupid. Please, sweetness, let me kiss you. Please, let me make it up to you."
My heart melted instantly as the anger I had been feeling only seconds before drained out of my body. His pleading and heartfelt words were all I needed to forgive him. I for one understood needing time.
Straining my lips to his, I touched his mouth gently, and as I began to separate from him, he pulled me close and took my mouth. The kiss was ravaging, pleading and desperate and seemed like it would never end. It lasted so long, was so mind boggling that we didn't break apart until a loud masculine voice was heard behind Trent.
"Well, son, this is interesting."
Trent's entire body stiffened against me, and a low growl erupted from his throat. A hand on each of my shoulders once again, he made sure I was steady, then spun to face the older man I'd seen at my front door.
"What the fuck are you doing here?"
"Looking for you, of course. When I didn't find you at Amber's house, or at the sheriff's office, I thought I'd check here." The sinister grin on his smarmy mouth was off. After what Trent had told me the night before, I could see the underlying evil in the man's dark green eyes. Joseph Harris was tall, but not even close to Trent's six-five, he was pretty fit, though age and probably over indulgence had thickened his middle and age lines were visible on his face. Joseph's hair was strawberry blonde, mixed liberally with white. From the pictures I'd seen of Trent's sister Natalie, she seemed to take after their father more than Trent did. Joseph was attractive on the surface, but underneath it all, I sensed an ugly, darkness.
"You need to stay away from Amber, don't ever come near her again. Not her house, her work, far away." I moved to the side and could see the deep scowl on Trent's handsome face. I saw anger there, a resentment I hadn't ever witnessed before. Trent's usually laid back and jovial manner was long gone, replaced by a fierce defender.
"Come on son, no need to act like that. Introduce me to your little lady here." Joseph's demeanor was unusually pleasant, overly friendly for the situation. His huge smile didn't brighten his face or lighten his eyes as Trent's did, the man was clearly as fake as they came.
"No, you'll never meet her, never know her. You are out of my life, Father, we have absolutely nothing to say to each other."
"Oh, now, it's almost your birthday, I wanted to see you, to catch up and find out how you're doing."
Trent didn't respond, but stepped forward, and without touching his father, moved him away from the door. He said something to Joseph, but it was too quiet for me to hear. Trent stepped back and slammed the door in the older man's face and turned the lock.
Reaching into his pocket, Trent pulled out his cell phone and after putting the phone to his ear stared at me intently. He wasn't angry with me, I knew, but something was working in his mind.
"Luke? Yeah, I'm at the store. What time is Aurora coming in this morning?"
Trent waited, apparently listening before he spoke again.
"Who put in the security system here?"
"All right, no, my father was just here. Yeah, call Jake and have him order, yeah, exactly. Thanks, man. No, I'll stay here."
He disconnected the call and placed another to Gavin, repeating the conversation almost exactly, just adding in that he was going to be into work for a while.
"Amber, if you see him, I want you to get away from him, okay?"
Nodding my agreement, I watched as the tension drained from his body and he reached for me once again.
"Is the front door still locked?"
"Yeah, it's early."
Once again, his mouth was on mine, though the desperation in his kiss was still present, it was completely different. He coaxed my mouth to open with long, lovingly sweet licks. Before he could move his roving hands into more interesting places, I broke the kiss and stepped back.
"Honey, we need to talk, and I need to work. Can we continue this later?"
"I'm not leaving you here alone, we have some time now. Hopefully, it's enough time for me to tell you how much of an asshole I am and to beg you to forgive me."
Shaking my head, I looked down, not able to hold his eyes any longer. "No, I pushed you too far, I'm sorry. There are plenty of things I don't want to talk about, but I pushed you when I knew you were uncomfortable."
"Can we sit?" He asked, looking around the crowded but well-organized storeroom.
Taking him by the hand, I led him to the chaise and side chairs that were nicely arranged in the store. As I began to sit on the chaise, he eyed it dubiously and sat in one of the chairs and pulled me onto his lap.
"I've heard stories about that couch thing, don't ever sit on it." He enlightened with a wicked grin.
Laughter escaped me and my heart lightened for the first time in almost twelve hours. "What have you heard?"
"Well, Luke doesn't tell tales, but I have a good idea of what they've done on that thing."
"Oh my god, that's terrible, no they haven't," I said, still chuckling.
He eyed it once again and returned his gaze to me with a raised brow, not convinced.
"You shouldn't ever be worried about asking me anything, I want to be an open book to you, and want you to be that to me. I'm afraid that I damaged something between us, walking out like I did." He explained, bringing back the serious conversation we needed to have.
Lifting my hand to caress his scruffy cheek, I watched as my fingers traced over his cheekbone and down to feel the rough stubble that wasn't usually there. Trent's face was so soft, usually shaved clean, I rarely saw him like this, not since the days after my miscarriage.
"No, I need to be less pushy, you had already shared so much. Your emotions must have already been raw, and I just kept poking you. I can't imagine how hard some of the things you've been through must have been on you. You're so gentle with me, and sometimes, you need me to be gentle too."
When he pulled me flush to his chest, I wrapped my arms around him as he buried his face in my neck. He didn't kiss me, didn't make any kind of sexual move, he just took his comfort from me. This man who was so strong, who had been there for me over and over again, needed me to be strong sometimes too. He needed me to be more understanding and maybe even compassionate. I could do that, he would certainly face more rough times in his life as I would, and I needed to learn to be there for him, to support him and to protect his heart.
"I love you, thank you for being just what I need." He whispered against my skin.
"I love you too, so much." A tear of relief slipped down my cheek as I cradled my man's head against me.
Hours later, Aurora and I watched as Trent, Jake and Reed carefully moved around the store, installing cameras and panic buttons. I really hoped that the system wouldn't be as difficult to
use as the one they put in my house. Those codes were so long, I found myself leaving it off more than Trent would appreciate.
Neither of us understood why the system was being upgraded. I knew that Joseph was a jerk, but couldn't imagine that he would be a real threat to me, Aurora or Dawn.
The front door flung open, bringing all three men to attention instantly. Reed was the closest to us, and he immediately moved his body between the newcomer and Aurora and me at the counter, where we'd been simultaneously watching the men and going through paperwork.
"Oh my god, Amber, listen to this!" Gillian shrieked as she rushed inside.
Reed went from the courageous defender, to relaxed and interested in an instant. The other guys had moved into an alert, defensive positions as well, Trent had moved toward us, but once they saw Gillian, they went right back to work.
"What is it?" I asked, realizing that Gillian had stopped just inside the door and was now looking around at the men.
"Well, hello, Gilli."
"Um, hey, Reed."
Aurora and I glanced at each other with raised brows and little smirks shared between us, knowing that there was a definite attraction between them.
"What's up, Gillian?" I asked, bringing her focus back to me.
Shaking herself, and moving past Reed, she walked over to us and lowered her voice. "I'm almost positive that Missy is mixed up with her ex. I talked to the neighbor just now, and she's pretty sure she saw him coming to Missy's apartment last night."
Missy, Gillian's cousin was in some kind of a mess, though she didn't know exactly what was going on with her yet. Years before, the girl had been on drugs but had gotten clean when she found herself pregnant with her little girl, Kelly, who was now about two.
"Is that the dealer guy?"
"Yeah, I'm going to call your dad in a minute, but I had to come down and talk to you."
"Is that Kelly's father?" That was something I had wondered about for a while but hadn't asked.
"No idea. Missy never told us. She didn't put a father's name on the birth certificate, I know that."
"Do you think your parents will help now?" I really hoped that her parents would get their heads out of the sand and step up to help Gillian. If not for Missy's sake, for the little girl.
Shaking her head with frustration, she shrugged. After a few more minutes, we explained what the boys were doing and made plans to get out the following weekend. Hope's baby shower was coming up too, and Aurora updated us on Hope's current misery with the over protective Jake.
As Gillian walked out of the store, after waving goodbye to the men, I noticed Reed's eyes follow her retreating backside intently.
Snickering beside me, Aurora elbowed me in the side and shook her head.
"What's up with them?" I asked, wondering if Aurora knew since she and Reed were so close.
"He doesn't say much, he obviously likes her, though."
"I think she likes him too, has he asked her out."
Shaking her head, she placed her finger to her lips when Reed looked over at the two of us and glared. We'd been caught.
"Hey, I think you guys have this, I've gotta run," Jake announced, looking between Reed and Trent and glancing down at his watch.
"We're good, what's up?" Trent asked.
"Hope's having another ultrasound today, she's so big, they wanted to confirm the position because last time, he was breech."
Reed's nose crinkled, making Trent laugh. "Man, that's nothing. You'd better get used to it if you ever convince some poor girl to give you a baby." Trent joked.
An involuntary gasp escaped my lips, and I felt moisture at the corner of my eyes. Biting the inside of my cheek, I pressed my tongue hard to the roof of my mouth and fought the tears.
Trent's head popped up, and his eyes met mine. Sorrow filled his eyes, remorse, and regret. I just couldn't take it a minute longer. I turned and as nonchalantly as possible, walked through the storeroom and into the small bathroom, locking myself inside. Unbeknownst to me, however, Aurora had witnessed that little scene. My secret wouldn't be kept much longer.
A light tapping on the door brought me back to my senses and away from the depressing thoughts of how much better Trent's life would have been, still could be if he would just move on to someone who could give him all that he desired.
"Just a minute," I called through the closed door, and turned the water on, dampening a paper towel and doing a quick repair to my mascara. I hadn't allowed myself to sob, as I wanted, but a few stubborn tears did escape. Staring into the mirror, I knew that my glassy eyes wouldn't go unnoticed by Trent, he saw everything.
"Sweetness, let me in, please."
Grabbing another towel, I opened the door and wiped my hands as if I'd just washed them. Straightening my spine and digging deep to find my courage once more, I faced him and forced my best smile on my face.
"What's up?" I brazened, praying he'd understand that I couldn't talk about it, not now.
"You-"
"I'm great, okay?" Pleading with my eyes, he nodded slightly, slung his arm around my shoulders and walked me back to the front of the store.
"Tacos!" Reed shouted as we walked back through the door.
Giving him a quizzical look, I swung my gaze to Aurora's as she laughed.
"He wants Mexican for lunch, does that sound good?" She explained, still giggling at Reed's excited outburst.
"Perfect, do you want me to go?"
"Nope, I'm going." Reed told us, "it takes a lot to keep up this amazing body, you might not get me everything I want."
Shaking my head, I appreciated the humor, so often present in this group. Though all of the guys and many of the girls had been through hell over the years, they were quick to laugh and almost always ready for a good time.
Lunch was devoured, the security upgrades finished, and Reed and Trent left for work. The afternoon passed quickly with plenty to keep us busy, but I didn't miss the strange looks Aurora gave me from time to time.
"What's up with that?" I asked her once we closed the store and were finally alone. With Trent and Luke working late, we decided to stay and work on inventory for a while.
"I don't know, but it seems like I'm missing something big."
"Big?"
"Yeah, something happened, I don't know what, but something. Are you going to tell me?"
Widening my eyes in shock, I wondered what I should say if I could say anything without breaking down. Glancing toward the front doors, now closed and locked, I looked back at Aurora and motioned for the seating area. Strangely, I rarely sat there, but twice in one day, I would have a serious conversation in those pink chairs.
When Aurora sat on the chaise, I had to laugh, and she looked at me questioningly. "I've heard a rumor about that chaise," I explained. Aurora's eyes widened, and a light blush swept over her cheeks.
"Damn, it's true?" I demanded.
Shrugging, she nodded, confirming that she and Luke had indeed gotten busy in the store.
Taking a breath, I steeled myself to share one of the hardest times of my life with my best friend. I gave her a little more detail about when Trent and I started dating, over a year before. How we found out that I was pregnant and about the heart-wrenching miscarriage.
Aurora was beyond surprised, she never had any idea.
"Do you remember when I'd come down with that flu?"
Understanding showed on her face as she wiped away another sympathetic tear.
"I should have known. You're never sick." Aurora's sad eyes and understanding tone were almost enough to tip me over the cliff of sadness, but I fought it and held strong.
"I'm so sorry about that happened. One thing I don't understand, though, why did you and Trent break up?" Aurora continued, and I didn't know how I would get her to understand.
I told her how my parents had wanted a large family and after several miscarriages had only gotten me. I knew that I wouldn't be able to go through that heartbreak over and over again like my mo
ther had. I explained that I wanted more for Trent, knew that he wanted a family as well and wanted him to have that chance.
"This all happened right before Nolan's death, right?"
"Yes, I think it was only about two weeks before."
Shaking her head, probably with remembered pain of her own, she apologized for not being there for me.
"No, I didn't tell anyone. It was too hard for me, too painful. You didn't know and had too much going on yourself."
"Why did you keep your relationship with Trent a secret?"
We talked about it briefly before but told her again about my fears of things going bad between Trent and me and how that would impact the group. Even before we had that first dinner together, that long ago night, I saw something special in Trent. It was something that drew me to him, and somehow I understood that if things went bad between us, it would hurt me greatly. If no one knew about us, I would still be able to show my face without shame, without the constant concern and meddling of my friends.
Though Aurora understood on the surface, I could see the wheels turning behind her eyes. I had no way of knowing what would come next, and I certainly didn't expect her to tell me about her fears when she and her now husband Luke began dating.
She had been left so many times in her young life. First by her father who had died when she was a teenager, her brother who left for the military and wasn't around, her mother who passed just a few years ago, and just a year ago when her brother, suffering from some serious injuries and PTSD he'd gotten while serving overseas in the Marine Corps, had committed suicide. Luke, being his best friend, he came immediately to be by her side, to support her through it, as there was no one else to stand with her. She gave me details of some previous relationships, how the men had found her lacking, or too needy, that she'd been confused by different complaints and was afraid to fully open up and let Luke into her heart. In retrospect though she did that years before.
Aurora opened up to me in a way she never had before. She shared her deepest fears, talking to me about the first weeks of their budding relationship and how things had gotten so messed up for a while. She attributed their struggles to the obvious grief, some residual PTSD, and nightmares Luke suffered from and most of all her own fears, her reluctance to speak with him honestly about her concerns.