With his orgasm subsiding, David relaxes, keeping himself tucked in between my legs as he breathes deeply into the base of my neck.
As my own breathing calms, I stare up at the ceiling, and a mischievous smile touches my lips. There’s something quite satisfying when you know you’ve succeeded in pushing the boundaries—knowing that you’ve done something that’s completely wrong.
Completely sick.
Completely twisted.
But, by fuck does it feel so good—so delectable—so right. As I think on this, the song “I’m Gonna Show You Crazy” by Bebe Rexha pops into my head. It makes me smile.
“I’ve missed you,” he confesses between breaths. He’s still high on euphoria from his recent orgasm. A part of me wonders if he’ll just forget about what happened yesterday and throw caution to the wind, but another part of me thinks it’ll plague him once the buzz of his orgasm completely subsides.
Pulling my hand up, I start threading my fingers through his hair. A tender gesture on my part—one that makes me frown a little. I’m not normally the tender type.
“Can I confess something to you?” I ask, hearing his breathing stop when I say it.
He pulls himself up and out of me before sliding next to my sweaty frame. “Of course. What is it?” He looks down at me, breathing his hot breath against my face. Again, he looks different from what I remember of him when I lived here all that time ago. I guess, at the time, all I had on my mind was revenge. I didn’t spend the time to get to know David or to be with him in more than a sexual capacity.
“I used you when I first came to live here.”
“I know,” he answers, but there’s no malice in his tone.
“I’m sorry about that.”
Tenderly, he strokes a strand of hair away from my face before brushing my cheek. “No need to be. I was just as much to blame. I took advantage of the situation because I was unhappy. You were a beautiful young girl offering an ageing man a chance to be young again. Selfishly, I took whatever you could give me. I was transfixed—even a little obsessed—the first time I laid eyes on you.”
Feeling inquisitive, I ask, “Did you ever cheat on Mum—other than with me, of course?” He shakes his head. “Be honest,” I chuckle.
He starts laughing himself. “I am being honest. Despite what you may think of me, I don’t cheat in a marriage—no matter how unhappy. You were the only person who ever tempted me. I had offers in the past, which I could have taken, but I turned every single one of them down. It was only you who broke me. I don’t know …” He turns his head away, deep in thought. “There was just something about you that I couldn’t put my finger on.”
I start wondering if he’s referring to what he found out from my mum, so I have to ask. “And what about now? Can you put your finger on it now?”
Out of nowhere, he sits up, rubbing his face in his hands on a sigh. “No.” That’s all he offers on the matter.
Getting up on my knees, I scoot to where he’s seated at the edge of the bed and wrap my arms around him from behind. “Are you okay?”
He places his hand on my arm and leans his head back on my shoulder. “I think I might be just tired, that’s all. I should go back to bed.”
He starts to get up, but I hold him. “Why don’t you sleep here with me?”
“I just thought you might want to be by yourself.”
I know why he’s running now. He feels guilty about what we’ve done. “I want you here. I want to know what it feels like to sleep in your arms. I never got the chance before.”
“Scarlet, you don’t owe me anything.”
“I know I don’t. I’m not doing this out of a sense of obligation. I want this.” I take a sigh before saying, “Please.”
With that begging word leaving my lips, David turns his head towards me with a smile. I knew he wouldn’t be able to resist it. “Okay,” he replies, scooting in the bed and offering me his arms. I smile, cuddling up next to him and placing my hand over his chest. I feel David take in a deep breath before starting to stroke my hair. It’s affectionate and loving, and it surprises me how much I’m enjoying it.
But then again, why should it surprise me?
Reid
“Brother!”
Someone’s shaking my shoulder, but I don’t want to move. My head is fucking pounding like a motherfucker.
“Brother! Wake up!” the voice calls again. I know it’s Akilah, but at the same time, my mind is racing back to what happened last night.
“Brother!” he screams again, tugging at my shoulder to wake me up.
Without thinking, I turn over and grab his neck. My eyes wide and unfocused.
“Brother,” he chokes out, “it’s me, Akilah.”
Once he says his name, my grip loosens, causing Akilah to choke. I must have squeezed him harder than I thought.
“Shit. What happened to you? You’re head’s bleeding.”
I pull myself up, but it’s a fucking effort. Everything aches. Everything pounds. “Someone was in the bar last night playing fucking tricks on me.”
Akilah frowns. “Are you sure? I checked everything last night before I locked up and left.” He gives me a look as if to say I’m making it up. “You were pretty wasted last night.”
“I fucking know that!” I screech, causing my head to pound harder in protest. “Someone was here. I’m telling you. Check the sound system. Is anything out of place?”
Akilah diligently walks up towards it and has a good look around it. Eventually, he looks down at me and shakes his head. “No, brother. Everything’s fine.”
“Shit!” I reply, holding my aching head.
“Why don’t you get cleaned up and have a rest? I can deal with the bar until you feel better.”
Angrily, I pull my hands away from my head and look up at Akilah. “I’m telling you, there was someone in here last night!”
Akilah doesn’t say anything at first. He just looks at me like he’s trying to figure it all out. I know what he’s thinking. I was drunk and stoned off my head last night, so it wouldn’t have surprised him if I saw pixies flying around the bar singing the fucking Birdie song.
“There’s only one way to find out. Check the cameras from when I left to when you fell and hit your head.”
I smile up at Akilah. “I knew there was a reason why I hired you.”
He smirks back down, offering a hand to help me up. I take it, and he pulls me to a standing position. My head pounds again, so I close my eyes. That’s when I feel a hand on my shoulder.
“Are you sure you’re okay? I can take you to the hospital if you need it?”
I shake my head. “No, it’s okay, but thank you. Nothing that some painkillers and a couple of hours sleep won’t cure.”
“Why don’t you go to bed now? We can check on the cameras later.”
“No. I won’t be able to rest until I see what happened.”
He motions with his hand. “Okay. Let’s go.”
I follow Akilah as he walks around the bar. When he stops still, that’s when I remember I threw the bottle of drink across the bar. I glance over his shoulder where I spot the scattered glass all over the bar floor.
“I had a temper tantrum last night,” I offer with a smirk. “I’ll clean it up once we’re done.”
Akilah says nothing. He simply shakes his head and carefully walks through the bar area, avoiding all the glass. I follow suit, hearing the faint cracking of glass under my feet. Right now, I don’t give a shit. I need to know what the fuck happened last night.
We make the journey upstairs and once on the landing, we move to the door that has all the state of the art surveillance cameras. As quick as a flash, I’m in my seat and getting to work rewinding the cameras to just after twelve last night. My head’s fucking killing me, but I have to know what’s happened. I won’t be able to rest until I do.
With sweat dripping down my brow, I wipe it away and notice blood on my shirt arm. Ignoring it for now, I press PLAY and watch
from when Akilah leaves and I’m sitting at the bar drinking. I watch as I throw the drink and cringe before looking at Akilah. I don’t really want him seeing me in such a weakened state, but if he’s here, he may be able to spot something I don’t. I see the moment I turn around, but there’s nothing behind me in the camera. Was I really hallucinating?
“You look like someone’s spooked you,” Akilah observes.
“Someone had.”
“There’s no one there.”
“I know. I don’t fucking like it, but I know.”
It’s a long shot, but there are certain angles the camera can’t reach. Those are angles we wouldn’t be able to see on the recordings. It’s quite possible that I saw something out of the corner of my eye which came from one of those areas. But that would mean that someone knows this place inside and out.
I watch the moment I stagger towards the fantasy room area, so I quickly click on the cameras for that area. I saw Scarlet. I definitely saw Scarlet.
Knowing I need the cameras in that particular fantasy room, I simultaneously play both side by side, so I can see the moment when the lights come on as well as Scarlet hanging from the bondage machine.
She’s not there.
“Fuck, no. That can’t be.” I rewind it and play it again, but there’s still nothing there.
“What’s wrong, brother?” Akilah asks with concern in his voice.
Realising I must have been stoned off my head, I say, “Nothing. I thought it was something, but obviously, it’s nothing.”
Akilah laughs. “That was some pretty strong shit you smoked last night. I’m hardly surprised.”
I shake my head, scanning the rest of the cameras until the moment I hit my head, but nothing can be seen. I obviously hallucinated the whole thing.
“Yeah, I must have been out of it. I could swear someone was in the bar last night.”
Akilah smiles, patting my shoulder. “Happens to the best of us. You need to get your head down.”
“No. I need to clean my shit up from downstairs.”
He places his hand out, stopping me. “Go get a wash and get your head down for a couple of hours. I’ll clean up.”
“It’s my shit. I should clean it.”
Akilah smirks. “I know, but I also know you’re suffering. Go to bed. I’ll clean up, and maybe when you’re ready, you can tell me what’s been haunting you since we met.”
He taps my shoulder, moving towards the door, and I marvel at how observant Akilah is. “Thanks, man.”
“You’re welcome,” he replies, walking out the door.
Silence envelopes the room. The only noise is what‘s rattling in my head. It’s an all too poignant reminder that I need something strong enough to take this pain away. I’ve had hangovers before, but this one takes the biscuit.
Slowly getting out of my seat, I leave the cameras rolling again, and head to my door. Immediately, I’m in the shower and soon after, I collapse in my bed.
I’m out like a light again.
Scarlet
The morning after I’d succeeded in getting David to give in to his desires, I’d woken up to an empty bed. David had gone to work early, and I had been left to get some much needed studying done. That same day, Dr Mason turned up with some bullshit story about needing to take my blood to check my iron levels, but I knew the real reason—it was the same reason David had been struggling to keep me at arm’s length. Yesterday, I had overheard him on the phone when he thought I was in the shower. He was frustrated because he wanted to know what was taking the results so long.
Today, the mailman came, and since then, David has been hiding away in his study. He still hasn’t told me what my mum had revealed. A part of me thinks she only did it out of bitterness and revenge, but another part of me—a small, sick and twisted part—hopes she was telling the truth. Then, I would finally have the father I had always wanted. He could give me the love my “parents” failed to give me as a child. He could offer me everything I’ve been missing.
Getting frustrated with the amount of time he’s been in there, I walk up to his study door and knock. I hear his voice grunting on the other end, so I open the door. He’s sitting at his massive mahogany desk—which looks to cost as much as this house. He’s slumped over, head in hands with a drink of scotch neat in front of him. I look for the letter, but I can’t see it anywhere. I try to gauge what it is he’s feeling, but I can’t tell by his posture whether the news has been a relief or possibly the worst news he’s ever gotten.
“David?” I ask, walking over to where he’s sitting. I place a hand on his shoulder and he slumps back in his chair, offering me a small smile. I take that opportunity to position myself in between his legs before placing both hands on his shoulder. “Is everything okay?”
“Everything’s fine.” He doesn’t offer anything further, but I need to know.
“Are you my father?” I can’t possibly take the fucking pressure anymore.
He searches my eyes, shock written across his face. “How did you ...?”
“I overheard you on the phone with Dr Mason and put two and two together.” A total lie, I know, but he may think I’m sick if he knew I pursued him after just learning of the possibility.
“No,” he suddenly breathes out. “I’m not your father.”
I wait for the news to hit some sort of nerve—something that gets me angry or upset. I guess I thought the news may have put me off David, but for some reason, I am still here with my hands wrapped around his shoulders.
But, in his face, it’s clear that something is off. “Are you disappointed?”
He lets out a sarcastic chuckle. “After what’s happened between us, no.”
“What’s the problem then?”
He shakes his head with a tight smile. “Nothing. I guess the last few days have been trying. I was trying to deal with some demons. It’s not easy learning you may be the father of someone whom you’ve slept with—someone you continue to sleep with.”
“It was only that one time.”
He stares up to me offering a reprimanding look. “Scarlet, there shouldn’t have been any times. I crossed the line with you the other night when I knew it was a possibility. I shouldn’t have done that. I have no excuses for it. I guess I’m just a sick motherfucker.”
He looks down, so I squeeze his shoulders. “Hey, don’t beat yourself up over this. It wasn’t as if I left you any choice.”
He lifts his head up, smiling, but it’s still a little off. “I told you that you were hard to resist.” He pulls his chair forward and nestles his head on my stomach. He breathes deeply as I run my fingers through his hair. Something is troubling him still, but I can’t figure out what it is. Maybe he’s had bad news at work or something. I’m about to ask him what’s wrong when he suddenly lifts his head up from my stomach and looks at it before giving it a kiss. He places his hands possessively on my hips, drawing me into his face. After a beat, he looks up at my perplexed face. “I want to be a father.” He reaches his hand up, stroking my belly. “Please say you’ll keep this baby—let me be the father I’ve missed being all these years. I’m not asking you to love me. I’m just asking that you give me this.”
Something inside me bursts at his words and his touch. The protective hand he places on my belly has a fire igniting inside of me.
Could I do this? Could I accept his offer and stay with him after everything that’s happened in the past? Could I play happy families with the last person on earth I thought I would ever end up with?
This is so fucked up.
I knew David would help me, and I know he cares, but I always thought that if I stayed with him it would be for my own selfish reasons.
My mind wages war inside my head. I have to get my revenge on Reid—I just have to.
Taking his hand away from my belly, I kneel down until I’m face to face with him. I take his head in my hands and I draw him close to my lips, offering a small, seductive kiss.
“How can you
want this with me?” I search his eyes for an answer.
“I know you need to get revenge on Reid, and I’m totally on board with that. All I ask is that you come home—once you’re done—and help me raise your child—our child. I don’t expect your commitment … only that you be with me and let me be a father.”
For the first time ever, I seem to be at a loss for words. My mind and body are having an all-out war. I shouldn’t want this. Being with David means being normal. It means bringing up a family and leading a normal, boring life.
But, then again, David and I aren’t normal.
I start thinking back to the other night when he gave into me so willingly knowing what could have been. I could have been his daughter, yet he slept with me.
An impish smile plays on my lips. I don’t know whether I could play this happy family shit, but I know right now how I feel.
“Okay,” I sigh, knowing that right now, I mean it.
Suddenly, David grabs me, pulling me in a tight embrace. “You don’t know how happy that makes me.” He kisses my cheek before pulling away. He looks so young now. You wouldn’t think he was forty. Leaving my mum was definitely the best decision he ever made.
“I’m rough around the edges and I don’t have a fucking clue as to how to be a mother. I—”
“Shh,” he says, taking my head in his hands this time. “I think you’re perfect—rough around the edges and all. I also think you will surprise yourself once you have this baby. But, even still, I am here. You won’t go without again. I promise you that. This house will be filled with nothing but love. There will be no one to fear in this house.”
Words like his should make me want to vomit, but for some reason, I can’t help the little spark I feel when he looks at me like that. It’s almost as if he’s seeing me for the very first time.
“I don’t deserve you,” I admit. And I mean it.
David chuckles. “Baby, after what you’ve been through in your life, you deserve to let someone take care of you.”
“Like a father should?”
My Valentine: Siren #2 Page 8