No. He tore his mouth away and turned away, mumbling, “I’m sorry, Drew. I don’t know what came over me. I think that’s what scares me the most, that I don’t always know how to behave and how to react. Not like I should, not like a respected member of the council should.”
“Eirik, don’t be so hard on yourself. You are a lot younger than the others on the council are. Your father died young, you know that. This isn’t supposed to be your responsibility, not yet. It would be like Freyja taking over as council leader from her father. She is in no way ready to be our chief.”
“I know. I’m just scared of making bad decisions,” he said.
“Isn’t that how we learn?” Drew asked.
He turned and grinned at her. “I think you should be on the council. All this wise advice you give.”
“Don’t be cruel.”
“What? I mean it. Look at how hard you work and then you go home and look after your father. It takes a large dose of maturity to do what you do.”
“I wonder if it will ever change. If my dad will ever get over my mom dying. But I think I already know the answer.”
“Do you want me to talk to Ben? He might be able to give you some ideas.”
She shook her head. “He would hate anyone prying into his affairs. It’s not as if this happens often, a mate dying so young. I think that’s the worst thing. He knows how many years he could live without her. And that scares him. To start with, he tried to keep going for me, but within weeks, he had let the sadness take him. It makes me wonder if it would be better not to ever find a mate.”
“You mean it would be easier to live alone, than to go through what either of our parents are going through?”
“Yes. Although it makes me feel like a coward.”
“You are anything but a coward, Drew. And I know exactly what you mean. No one to disappoint.”
“Look at us. We are such good company for each other. Two miserable, lonely souls.”
“Then let’s do something about it,” he said brightening.
“What do you mean?” she asked, getting the feeling that whatever it was, it was most likely going to turn her life upside down. A feeling both thrilling and frightening in equal measures.
“We go out. Tonight, I am going to take you out to dinner,” he said, putting his hand up to stop her when she was about to object. “No. I insist. We go out to dinner, talk, maybe dance. Relax a little.”
“Eirik, the evenings are the worst for my dad.”
“Then I’ll find someone to babysit him.”
“Who?”
“I have an idea. Does he sober up at all?”
“Later, after he’s had a sleep this afternoon.”
“Great. I want you to keep him off the liquor as much as possible. Can you do that?”
“I’ll try, but I have to work.”
“So water it down.”
“He’ll notice.”
“Drew. I am picking you up at seven. Try to keep him sober and leave the rest to me. OK?”
They had reached the end of the trail. She stopped, looking down at her feet while she tried to make a decision. He stepped forward, his finger going under her chin and tilting it up. She couldn’t help but look into those deep brown eyes and see the softness there. Licking her lips, her gaze dropped to his and wondered what it would be like if he kissed her right at this moment.
“You are not going to wriggle out of this. OK?” His breath was warm on her face; she swallowed down her rising desire for him. She longed to go out with him, but now her father wasn’t her biggest fear, instead she was scared she would fall for him. Really fall for him, with all her heart. It would be wrong, they were not fated.
Yet that was what made this so appealing. She would have a friend, someone to talk to and have fun with. Run along the mountain meadows with and swim in the rivers. But then she could walk away. Friends. Without benefits. Without that pull that soul mates have. It sounded perfect, and she decided it was worth a chance.
“Seven.” She took one step back, looking one last time at his perfect body and sighing before turning and running off home.
By the time she arrived at her front door, her heart was beating fast, not from the exercise, more from the thrill of being near him. Yet she knew he was not her mate, and so she decided to enjoy it.
Males often took lovers and since she never wanted to find her mate, why shouldn’t she experience sex with a man she could trust? All she had to do was remind herself not to fall for him. Because when he found his mate, and she was certain he would, then she would be dumped so quickly she would see stars. But right now, as she let herself in and saw her father still asleep, not having even missed her, the stars she saw were those that spun through her head as she let her excitement at going on a date wash over her.
“Not a date,” she said firmly as she walked to the kitchen and put the kettle on. Then she skipped, yes actually skipped, upstairs to strip off her wet clothes. Figuring she should shower before she changed, she grabbed her robe and headed for the bathroom.
It felt so good to let the warm water flow over her. She closed her eyes and let herself imagine what it would be like if that warm water was his hands and his mouth, caressing every part of her body. Lathering up the soap, she rubbed it all over her body. Tempted when she washed between her legs to bring herself some satisfaction and release. Her body ached for him, ached to be turned on, then to allow her arousal to be taken to a point of no return and flung over the edge.
But she heard her father moving about downstairs. Feeling guilty, she washed her hair quickly, dried herself, and then quickly dressed for work. Going downstairs, she was thankful to find he had made coffee instead of going straight to the whiskey bottle.
“Hi, Dad,” she said kissing his cheek. “How are you feeling?”
“Terrible,” he said, giving her a weak smile. “I’m so sorry, love.”
His eyes fell on the bruise above her eye. She put her hand there to cover it. “It’s OK. It was an accident.”
“One that shouldn’t have happened.” He took a sip of his coffee. “I promise you that will never happen again.”
“What are you up to today?” She wanted to move the conversation away from the blue bruise on her face.
“I thought I might tackle the garden,” he said, looking out at what used to be her mom’s pride and joy.
“Are you sure?”
“Yes. I’ve done some thinking and I know I need to get over this.” He didn’t sound too sure that was possible.
“I’m here for you, Dad.”
“That’s why I thought I might cook you dinner tonight.”
“Dinner. Tonight?” Why, she asked herself, did this happen to her? But the fact that her father was trying to pull himself together meant she had to support him.
“You don’t have plans?” he asked, studying her closely, his eyes no longer having that bloodshot look they did when he had been drinking.
“No. When do I ever have plans?” she joked.
“True,” he murmured.
“OK. I have to get to work.” She kissed him again and headed for the door, hoping she would have enough time to go to Eirik’s and call off their dinner arrangements. All the passion she had felt for him had passed. Maybe this was the best way. No mate, no lover. She didn’t need any other complications, after all.
Chapter Seven - Eirik
Feeling happier, Eirik had gone home and fixed himself some lunch. Afterwards, he settled down to continue his thorough examination of his father’s affairs. This mostly centred in dealings he had been responsible for in his role of Holder of the Deeds. A grand name for the Clan's treasurer.
Luckily, for Eirik, figures interested him; he smiled at that. Drew Stanton’s figure certainly interested him. Dinner with her tonight would lift his spirits even more. She was good company and probably in need of a friend as much as he was. That made him feel less as though he were an invalid in need of a nurse. They could help each other
through their problems.
They could talk. Trusting that it was in confidence, because they both had parts of their lives, parts of themselves, which they wanted to keep hidden.
Opening the next folder of documents, he began to go through the accounts of some properties the Clan had ownership of, making notes as he went. This would certainly lead to some follow-up meetings with Stuart McCormac. Some of the rents hadn’t been increased for ten years. Not immediately worrying, but he didn’t want to leave anything to chance. However, he had learned that the Clan did things certain ways, with certain favours bestowed on clan members. For reasons he wasn’t aware of. It meant he was expected to run any big changes past Stuart to avoid upsetting people. One of the more frustrating aspects of his job. It made him feel as though he were on a leash.
He paused. Was he mistaken, or was that someone knocking the door? Getting up he went to the window and looked out. There stood Drew, looking delicious in a skirt, which clung to her body in just the right places. Damn, how he wouldn’t like to spend an hour unzipping it, slipping it off her curvy body and exploring what was underneath.
Then he reminded himself that licking and kissing every inch of her body was never going to happen. She wasn’t his mate, and he didn’t want to take her virginity. That was for her mate. Eirik always observed traditions.
Still, when he opened the door to her, saw the frightened colour in her cheeks, and smelled her arousal, it was hard to keep his bear caged. She could feel the attraction, too. But as soon as she opened her mouth, he knew she was about to call their non-date dinner off.
“Hi, Eirik. Listen, something’s come up.”
“I’m not going to take no for an answer.”
“My dad has decided to sober himself up.”
“Ah. But surely that means he is well enough to be left on his own? You can have dinner with me without worrying about him.”
“He wants to cook me dinner.” She looked at him and she could see how torn she was. He couldn’t put any more pressure on her. Her bottom lip trembled and he found himself wanting to kiss her so very much when she said, “I’m really sorry.”
“Listen, Drew, don’t beat yourself up about it. I know you have a duty to him. I understand. Another night?”
She brightened, her smile so soft, so uncertain that he got the biggest erection in his pants, he could remember. The effect she had on him was mystifying. It was almost as if she was his mate, but not quite intense enough. He guessed it was more lust than anything; he couldn’t remember the last time he had sex. Maybe that was what he needed tonight. Sex. No-strings sex.
“Sure. Thanks, Eirik. Listen, I have to go, I’ll be late for work.”
“See you soon, Drew. This is a rain check, a postponement, not a cancellation.”
She swung her head round and smiled, her hair flicking away to show that bruise on her face. As he lifted his hand and waved, he only hoped things would work out for her and her father.
Closing the door, he turned to find his mom standing in the doorway of his study.
“Was that Vic Stanton’s daughter?” she asked.
“Yes. I invited her out to dinner. But her dad is turning over a new leaf and making her dinner.”
“Poor man. Poor Drew.”
“I know, that’s why I thought it would be good for her to get out.”
“And you to get out too.” She came up to him and looked at him with her mouth curled at the corner. “You look tired.”
“I’m fine. At least now I can carry on working and have an early night.”
“Hmm,” his mom said and left him to it.
Chapter Eight - Drew
Work dragged. It gave her too much time to think about Eirik and their cancelled dinner. She refused to let herself think of it as a date. He had promised her no romantic entanglement, only food. But still, a girl could dream.
“Drew?” Her boss’s voice cut through her daydream.
“Yes, Arnold.” When there were clients in earshot, she had to call him Mr. Williams, but when it was just the two of them, they were more informal.
“It’s quiet today, why don’t you go home early. You look tired.”
“Are you sure?” She knew it was because he felt uncomfortable looking at her. He had spotted the bruise on her face, despite her best efforts. With make-up concealer and combing her hair forward instead of tying it back neatly as she usually did for work.
“There’s no point us both being here. If anyone comes in, I can make the appointments.”
“Thank you,” she said, not needing to be told twice. Grabbing her coat and purse, she was out the door and on her way home within five minutes. To avoid risking anyone else she knew seeing the bruise on her face, she deciding to walk rather than catching a bus. Breathing in the fresh air, Drew felt a little lighter and more optimistic than she had for some time. She told herself that it was because her father was feeling so much better. However, there was also a sneaking suspicion it was because of her encounter with Eirik this morning.
The leaves were starting to look tired and old; autumn would soon be upon them, and then winter. How wonderful it would be to curl up in front of a log fire with a man like Eirik. To feel his arms about her and lean back against his large chest, feeling safe and cherished.
As she walked, Drew allowed herself to examine her disappointment at not going out with him. She didn’t reprimand herself for wanting to spend time with him rather than her father. At her age, it was only right she would want other people’s company. On the whole, she was surrounded by old men. Her father and her boss were the two people she spent most of her time with. Only when people came into the office did she speak to anyone her own age, and then it was just about work.
Crossing the street, she caught sight of a woman about her age pushing a buggy. That’s what a lot of her friends were doing now, having found their mates and settled down. Everyone seemed to have moved on. Yet, between her dad and the loss of her mother, Drew felt she hadn’t so much moved on as moved backwards. This was the time of her life when she was supposed to be young, free, and single, not chained to a desk and then to a sink when she got home.
Self-pity, that was all it was. Not quite. The real reason she felt miserable was that as much as she loved her dad, she had been really looking forward to going out. But her duty lay at home.
“Hi,” she called as she opened the front door and went inside. Silence met her. “Dad?”
Her heart sank. Don’t say he had already succumbed to the bottle of ever-present whiskey. Going through into the sitting room, she half expected him to be passed out, drunk. There was no one there. Maybe he had gone to bed. Unusual, he never got that far in the day. The sofa was where he would crash and stay for an hour or two before he got up to start all over again. The sofa might just as well have been his bed actually, because that was where he would stay all night, more often than not. The reason was clear to Drew; he hated going upstairs to his empty room. She could only imagine how unbearable that empty bed was.
“Dad,” she called louder, listening for any sound from upstairs. Then movement in the backyard made her stop and look out. There he was.
Tears pricked her eyes; he was working diligently at pulling the weeds out around her mom’s favourite roses. Placing her purse down on the countertop, she went to the fridge, grabbed two cold sodas and headed out into the late afternoon sun.
“Wow, you have been busy,” she said, handing the cold drink to her dad.
“Once I got into it, I couldn’t stop.” He took a gulp of the drink and then said, “Thanks, that was just what I needed. I can’t believe I let her down by not keeping on top of the weeds.”
“Hey, Dad,” Drew said, rubbing his back as though he were the child. “She would understand. Now, what do you want me to do?”
“Want to prune back that shrub? It’s getting a bit out of hand and will block the light out. Can’t let these roses die. I bought her this one on our first anniversary.”
&
nbsp; “She told me, Dad. And this one when I was born,” Drew said, touching the waxy leaves.
“She loved you so much,” he said quietly.
“She loved us both very much. I know I’m not as good around the house as she was, but together we can get everything back together.”
He put his arm around her shoulders. “You’ve done enough. Until I find a job, I’m going to look after the house and do the shopping. Although you might have to come with me a few times until I get the hang of it.”
“Sure thing. I would love to.”
He kissed the top of her head, a sob shuddering through him. She looked away, letting him regain control. He was never one to show his feelings, not these kind of feelings anyway. That was his problem: he bottled them up and then drowned them in liquor until they went away.
“Right,” he said, taking another mouthful of his soda. “Let’s get started.”
She smiled at his new-found enthusiasm and joined him in trying to get the garden back to how it was. Perhaps it might be symbolic of their lives. By pulling this part of her mom’s memory back together, they might be able to patch over the tangled remains of the rest of their lives without her.
It was dusk by the time they had finished, neither of them noticing the passing time. Drew stood up and stretched. Her back ached and she longed to soak in the bath, but her stomach told her dinner would have to come first. Unbidden thoughts of Eirik came to her, but she brushed them aside. Her dad needed her support, Eirik would wait. Or move on.
“I’ll go and start dinner,” she said.
Her dad was putting the tools away. “Oh, damn I forgot I said I would cook.”
“It’s no problem; I’ll fix us something quick.” She went inside, going to the bathroom to wash her hands. Looking in the mirror, she brushed her long auburn hair back from her face. She had caught the sun; her skin, usually so pale from spending too much time indoors, had a healthy glow. Turning her head, she looked at the bruise; it didn’t look as bad any more. One or two more days and it should have gone completely. At least if it had been the catalyst for her dad’s transformation, it was worth it.
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