by Jamie Carie
Turning to Ballard, he said, “You can have her.”
~~~~~~
Maddie was exhausted as she pulled into her parents’ driveway—rush-hour traffic, first day of a new job kind of tired. Her head was spinning with all the new information that Kat had rattled off to her from her pouty red lips. Her body felt as wiped out as she did during the first trimester of pregnancy. How had she managed to work full-time in an office during all of Max’s pregnancy? She could barely move. Worse, at 6:00 in the evening, Max would be going through his cranky phase and her mom would be obsessing whether or not Maddie had survived the semi-truck jockeying on I-70 in her beat-up Nissan.
She put the car into park and just sat, for one quiet moment, in the driveway, closing her eyes and taking some deep relaxing breaths, turning up Sarah McLachlan on the car stereo. She felt the strains of the piano echo inside her body, felt the hum from her throat as she began to sing along, connecting with what Sarah called a beautiful release. She sang along, thinking that her voice still sounded okay. She used to sing in high school and then in a choir at her church, but after Max was born life had gotten so busy. She hadn’t really sang in long time but listening to music had become something of a life-giving force since Brandon had died, giving her a cushioned landing place when the grief felt about to crush her.
As the song faded away, she turned off the car, pasted a big smile on her face and walked up the sidewalk to the front door. She opened it to see her mother coming around the corner from the kitchen, Max in her arms. “Maddie? Oh, thank goodness, I was getting worried. How did it go?”
Maddie dropped her satchel on the couch, feeling like it had been a lifetime since she had walked so excitedly out with it this morning. “It went really well.” She gave her mom a perfunctory smile and reached for her son. “Max, come here to Mommy.”
Max rushed into her arms, all fresh smelling from his bath, PJs on and grinning from ear to ear. He put his chubby arms around her neck, squeezing tight, making Maddie laugh.
Maddie buried her nose into his curly, golden-brown hair. “Oh, Max. I missed you today. Did you have a good day with Grammy?”
“He didn’t eat his dinner,” Gloria said, lighting up.
“Mom, can’t you smoke that outside? It’s not good for Max.” Maddie hated to ever say anything negative to her mother, but this was one area that had to be addressed, especially since she wasn’t home all day to monitor it.
Gloria nodded. “Oh, yeah, I forgot.” She went to the door and hung her arm out, letting the cool, autumn air into the living room.
Maddie pulled Max onto the sofa with her, still cuddling him close. “So, what did you do today? Did you have fun?”
“Saw a doggie,” Max announced with a big smile.
Gloria shook her head from her stance at the door. “I thought he was going to get bitten for sure. He chased after every dog in the park today, but he really went after this one cute puppy.”
“Really? A puppy, Max?” Maddie ignored the near-fatal wounding. “What color was he?”
“Brown with a big white spot,” said Max. “I think I loved him.”
Maddie felt her heart expand and sudden tears rush to her eyes. “Oh, Max. Did you find out his name?”
“Doggie.”
Gloria laughed from the door. “Her name was Doodles. The owner was a nice grandmother who thought Max was adorable.”
“Which he is,” they both said at the same time.
Gloria and Maddie laughed.
“I want a doggie,” Max stated, crossing pudgy arms over his chest. “A big white doggie.”
Maddie shook her head, still smiling. “Maybe someday. Maybe when we get our own house, then we will get a dog.”
“Dogs are a lot of work, Maddie. You’re going to have your hands full enough being a single parent to Max and working full-time.”
Maddie nodded slowly and shrugged. “You’re probably right, but you never know. We might be able to get one someday.”
“How did your first day go? Did they really give you the job?”
“Yes. It was good. I think once I get over the learning curve, I’m really going to like it.” She left out all the morning drama with Jordan’s almost ex-wife. “I’m starving though, any dinner left?”
“Tacos in the fridge. I saved you two.”
Tacos. Great. Maddie pulled Max closer into her arms and started for the kitchen. “Let’s go warm up Mommy’s dinner and you can tell me all about your day, okay sweetie?”
Gloria, thankfully, left them alone in the kitchen while Maddie heard Max’s account of the day—the park, the cartoons he had watched, too many cartoons, and how grandpa had played horsey ride with him when he got home from work. Maddie nodded, smiling encouragement, popping bits of her untouched taco into his mouth while she asked him questions, trying all the while to steel herself against overwhelming feelings of loss.
It would crash in on her at odd times, like now, when she wasn’t looking for it and hadn’t the energy to steel herself against it. She wanted to fall in a heap on the cold kitchen floor. She wanted to bury her head into her hands and never look up again. But she couldn’t do that. She had to be strong for Max. But she wasn’t strong enough to block out the leaden litany of her heart drowning out the soft tones of her son’s chatter. Why did you leave us, Brandon? Why did everything have to change? I miss you so much. God help me, I miss you.
The anger was lessening, though. Now she felt mostly a raw sadness that gnawed at her insides—moments that stole her breath away and left her aching for just one more time to be in his arms.
“Come on, Max,” she coaxed, staring into the deep brown eyes of what she still had. “Let’s read a story before bedtime.”
Max nodded. “Daddy read it?”
Oh no. She really couldn’t do this tonight. Not tonight. “Daddy’s gone, Max, remember?” Her throat choked on the words, making her silently berate herself. “Mommy will read you a great story.” Her voice sounded angrier than she wanted it to. He was only two. He didn’t understand.
“Daddy’s in heaven,” Max said, pointing to the ceiling.
A tear escaped, darn it. Darn it! She would not cry tonight.
Gloria came into the room and scooped Max into her arms. “Yes, sweetie. Daddy’s in heaven having a great big time up there with God. And someday we’ll all be up there with them. But for now let’s go read that story.”
Maddie smiled at her mother through her tears. “Thanks, Mom.”
Gloria nodded, smoothed down Maddie’s hair like she used to when she was a little girl. “I’ll read the first one and then you can come in and read him his favorite.”
Maddie nodded, wiping her cheeks and sniffing.
Gloria looked deep into her daughter’s eyes. “It’s going to be okay, Maddie. It will get easier.”
“Will it?”
Gloria nodded. “I promise.”
Maddie watched her mother pad down the hall with Max’s arms wrapped around her neck and tried to pull herself together. Taking a couple of deep breaths and blowing her nose, she pasted another smile, a mother’s mask, on her face and followed them into the makeshift bedroom that had belonged to her little sister before Michelle had gone away to college.
They were lucky—blessed—to have this place to go to and parents who loved and cared for them. And she had a promising new job. She needed to focus on the good things in her life.
Maddie entered the bedroom and couldn’t help the laugh that escaped seeing Max cuddled up under her sister’s faded but soft comforter. There was another thing to be thankful for—thank God Max didn’t seem to mind the bright floral wallpaper or her sister’s big pink bed.
CHAPTER SEVEN
“I can’t believe we’re going to this fundraiser,” Sasha gushed, climbing into the limo where Maddie sat, hands clasped tightly in her lap.
“I know! Oh, Sasha, you look amazing.”
“So do you. Who knew fairies could be so sexy?”
M
addie laughed, looking down at her white satin gown. “It’s not too much? I even have glitter eyelashes and a wand, see?” She waved it in front of Sasha’s nose.
“You look ethereal. Really. Now, what about me?”
Sasha was dressed in black from the tip of her pointy hat to the low, jagged-cut black mini-dress, black fishnets and pointy-toed red sling-backs. “You make a very cute witch,” Maddie assured her.
“Cute? Cute is not what I was going for.” Sasha pouted.
“Okay, okay! Hot…sexy! You will steal the show!” Maddie giggled.
“That’s more like it.” Sasha burst out laughing.
The limo pulled with silken ease from the street outside Sasha’s house, heading toward the Hilton Hotel where the Halloween party and fundraiser for the Racers was to be held.
When they were close, Sasha grasped Maddie’s arm. “I’m so excited! Will Jake Hart be there?”
Maddie laughed. “I think so. But you promised to be good, Sasha, remember? This is a business event for me.”
Sasha opened her mouth and jutted out her chin in mock offense. “What do you think I’m going to do, attack him on the dance floor or something?”
“Well …” Maddie giggled as Sasha’s wand appeared, waving menacingly in front of Maddie’s eyes. “Just don’t change him into a frog and slip him into your pocket or anything, okay?”
“What a great idea! I knew there was a reason I brought you.” Sasha grinned, eyes overly bright.
Maddie collapsed back into the leather seat with a howl of laughter.
When the laughter died down, Sasha asked, “So, you nervous about how this is going to go? You’ve been working so hard on it.”
It was true. The last few weeks had been a whirlwind of hard effort and training. She had been given this fundraiser, one of the Racers’ biggest fundraisers of the year, as the ultimate test. If she pulled this off then she could do just about anything else her job might require.
“I’ll be glad when it’s over, that’s for sure. But really, I think it just might go off without a hitch.”
“Your wedding was fabulous and you practically planned that all by yourself,” Sasha reminded her as they turned into the hotel’s parking garage.
“Yes, it was,” Maddie agreed with a small smile and dreamy voice. “As long as there is plenty of good food and drinks…and the band, as long as they like the band, everything else should take care of itself.”
The girls climbed out of the limo, admiring each other’s costumes again, and then made their way up the grand staircase to the ballroom. It was early, but Maddie wanted to be on hand in case she was needed. It was a good thing, because the minute she walked into the door, Randy Bentley approached her, panic in his eyes. “We have a problem.”
“What is it?”
“Two of the players, one of whom is supposed to speak soon, are in the bar, and they’ve already had too much to drink. We have to get those boys sobered up.”
Boys? These were grown men. Multimillionaire, hard-disciplined, grown men. How was Maddie supposed to have any sway over them? “Are they here alone? Any wives or girlfriends?” Maddie had learned not to associate with the players much, especially the ones with wives and girlfriends. She’d learned to go through the women, make friends with them first, and then other avenues might be opened for her to be friendly with the players.
“No. They came stag.”
“Who is it?”
“Hart and Cornell.”
Hart? Her stomach flip-flopped. “Have you talked to them?”
“I tried, believe me.” Randy pulled out a handkerchief and dabbed at his receding hairline. “They got me in a headlock and tried to pour a drink down my throat.” He blushed against the white collar of his tuxedo shirt and admitted, “They said if I go back in there and bother them they’ll do body shots on my…well, you girls probably know more about what those are than I do, but I’m not risking it. You’ll have to give it a try.”
Sasha laughed. Maddie rolled her eyes. “Great. Okay, I’ll go see what I can do. Anything else going wrong? People will start to arrive in about fifteen minutes.”
He shook his head. “You’ve done a great job, Maddie. Everything from the decorations to the food looks great, better than last year. I’ll keep an eye on things out here. Maybe you and your friend can use a little feminine charm to bring those guys around. Let me know if they give you any real trouble though, okay?”
Maddie nodded and took Sasha’s arm. “We’ll be all right.”
Randy nodded, his relief obvious. “You look great, by the way. Both of you.”
“Thanks.”
Maddie led Sasha into the darker, adjoining room, where a dance floor, a stage, and a long, low-lit bar had been set up. “Come on, let’s see if we can talk some sense into these guys.”
“I can’t talk to them yet,” Sasha whispered, wide-eyed and suddenly nervous. “I pictured myself nicely inebriated before talking to any of the players. And ‘Hart’ means Jake Hart, right? I’m about to meet Jake?”
Maddie rolled her eyes and laughed, pulling her friend along. “Their size is worse than their demeanor. Now show some backbone. Come on.”
Sure enough, as they came closer to where the two men sat, Jake’s voice rang out, slightly slurred, “Would you look at that, Marcus. A witch and an angel, comin’ to visit us.”
Marcus whistled. “I’ll take the witch over an angel any day.” Then louder, directed to them. “Well hello ladies, come on over and have a drink.”
Maddie and Sasha came up to them, Sasha standing right in front of Jake. “I’ll have a drink,” she said, ignoring Maddie’s shocked stare. “Cosmopolitan, please.”
Jake grinned at her, turned to the bartender to order her the drink and then swung back suddenly to Maddie with the question “What’ll you have, angel?”
“I’m not an angel. I’m a fairy. And I won’t be drinking anything.”
“Wait a minute.” His eyes squinted in the dim light as he stared at Maddie’s face. His head nodded up. “You’re that girl. Working for the foundation.”
Maddie gave him a single nod. “Yes, I am. Now Mr. Hart, I’ve put a lot of time and effort into this event and you are supposed to say a few opening remarks, remember?”
“Of course I remember.”
Maddie backed down at his tone. “Well, you seem a little…um, inebriated, to be precise, and I’d like to help you sober up before your speech.”
Jake’s gaze took on a sudden disenchanted sheen. “Oh yeah? How are you planning to do that?”
Maddie fiddled with her skirt, not meaning to draw attention to the clingy sheath of white satin. “Coffee, maybe? Have you eaten anything? Could I get you some appetizers?”
Jake laughed, low and dark. “Sure, let’s go up to my room and have an appetizer together. Why not? I’ve seen you in your costume and I know how good you can move.” His sarcasm was like a slap in the face.
Maddie took a shocked breath. “What are you talking about?”
“Halftime, at the game. You know, you had yourself sashaying all over that floor. Best girl there,” he laughed, “not that any of them were much to watch.”
Maddie felt sudden, angry tears gather in her eyes. Why was he attacking her like this? “Fine. Give your speech and make a fool out of yourself. It will only reflect badly on you, not me.” She turned, choking over her shoulder to Sasha, who looked equally color-drained, “Come on, Sasha. You can’t possibly have a crush on this jerk now.”
Maddie stopped and turned back toward Sasha, wondering why she wasn’t right behind her. She watched in suspended horror as Sasha grabbed her drink from the bar and said to Jake with a low, hissing voice, “You have no idea what you’re talking about or who you’re talking about. Maddie is the best person I know and was begged to dance that night, replacing someone who was sick at the last minute. She didn’t want to do it. She didn’t even know the routine. She did it for the kids at Colburn Place.”
Maddie
cringed when Sasha squinted her eyes until they were slits of anger. “You’re not worthy to kiss the soles of her shoes, you, you, cad.” With the look of a sudden decision, Sasha threw the red drink in Jake’s face.
She turned, leaving two shocked, slack-jawed men in her wake, catching up to Maddie and rushing with her to the ladies room to freshen up.
“Oh, Maddie, how horrible was he?”
Maddie clung to Sasha’s shoulder. “Why? Why would he say those terrible things about me? What have I ever done to him?”
Sasha handed her some tissue. “Who knows? What a conceited monster! I can’t believe I wasted hours of my life daydreaming about him. Are they all that awful?”
Maddie shook her head, blowing her nose. “I hope not. I’ve only met a few. But it’s so strange. He was so nice in the elevator my first day.”
“Elevator? You didn’t tell me about any elevator encounter with Jake Hart. What happened?”
“I didn’t tell you because I knew you would be mad that I didn’t get his autograph for you. He was helping me get past the ex-wife to my interview. Remember? I said one of the players escorted me back to Jordan’s office?”
“Oh, yeah, you just didn’t mention who. I wouldn’t have been mad. Gosh, especially not now. If I had his autograph, I’d staple it to his forehead and throw darts at it.”
Maddie giggled, imagining it. “Thanks for sticking up for me. I—I didn’t know what to do.”
Sasha dug into her tiny black-sequined bag and held out a pale pink lip-gloss. “Here, get some makeup back on and we’ll get right back out there and ignore him and his friend for the rest of the night.”
Maddie nodded. “You’re right. I have to get back out there and pretend it didn’t really upset me.” She grimaced when she looked at her blotchy face and smeared mascara. “Men,” she muttered as she reapplied the eyeliner, cleaning up the smudges under her eyes. “My makeup was perfect.”
“Hurry. We don’t want to be missed.”
After fixing Maddie’s face, they turned and rushed out the door. Maddie was shocked into stillness to feel a hand on her shoulder and a tall presence looming at her back.