With a toss of his head the big chestnut gelding moved across to the bridleway and waited for her to unlock the gate. Sliding off his back she slotted the key in the padlock, pushed open the gate and led him through, wondering, as she did so, how long it would take her to persuade Luke to sit on a horse.
She thought of the frowning, dark haired boy she had last seen in London, too intent on his drawing to say goodbye to her and Izzie, and wondered if he would remember them. Despite the success of their visit they hadn’t managed another one, partly because summer was Jodie’s busiest time at the riding school but mainly because Marcus had had to return to California twice more in the past three months. This meant they’d had to survive on a few snatched meetings when he’d found the time to travel north to visit his new house, or to work with Izzie. Remembering the frustration that shadowed every visit Jodie sighed. Then her face cleared. Soon it was going to change. In the meantime it was phone calls or nothing.
* * *
Izzie shouted down from the bedroom window as Buckmaster trotted back into the yard. “Marcus called. He says Luke’s thrown a wobbly so it could be hours before they arrive.”
“I very much doubt he put it exactly like that,” Jodie frowned up at her sister as she took in the implication of the message.
“Well no, but that’s what he meant isn’t it?”
“Maybe, but you could be kinder about it.”
“Telling it as it is isn’t unkind Jodie. Nor is saying that Marcus doesn’t have the first idea how to handle him.”
“You know that after spending one weekend with him and Luke do you?”
“Yes. I love Marcus, you know I do, but I still don’t rate his parenting skills. He’d rather avoid trouble and embarrassment than challenge Luke and you know it isn’t helping him. Do you realize he’s never even taken him back to the park to see the birds? When I asked him why he just shrugged and said he hadn’t had time.”
“Well maybe he hasn’t. And he’s anxious to protect him from the Press too don’t forget.” Jodie’s instinctive defense of Marcus warred with her feelings. Izzie was right. Despite agreeing that he wasn’t doing enough to help Luke accept other people, he hadn’t changed anything. Luke was still bound by his routine. Not for the first time she wondered how he really felt about his son.
She ended the conversation by leading Buckmaster back into his stable but as she began to unsaddle him she felt a stab of guilt. She and Izzie had taken up so much of Marcus’ time in recent months he’d had little left to spare for Luke, and she felt uneasy about it.
Every time she tried to discuss it though, Marcus had headed her off by insisting Luke was well looked after and that things would change once they moved. She hoped he meant it. At least he’d agreed to let him try the riding program although without any real interest, and she knew he wasn’t expecting much success. Well there was only one way to deal with that. She was going to prove him wrong.
Satisfied Buckmaster was settled, she left him happily munching hay and hurried across to the office to check her schedule for the day. Carol was already sitting at the desk, tapping figures into the computer. She looked up with a frown.
“You look worried. Anything I can do?”
“Yes, you can tell me which is the best horse for a boy who is a complete novice and who is likely to have a meltdown if something upsets him?”
* * *
“He’s so much worse than I thought he’d be I’m beginning to wonder if I’ve done the right thing,” Marcus sounded tired and despondent as he described his journey north.
Jodie listened patiently as he told her how it had taken him and Mrs. Cotton more than two hours to persuade Luke to leave the apartment, and how he had sobbed and screamed for half the journey.
“I thought he understood about the move. I thought he was ready for the journey and so did Mrs. Cotton, but we were wrong. The noises he made were heartbreaking Jodie. It felt like I was torturing him.”
“What upset him? Surely it wasn’t the car because he’s used to being driven.”
“He kept saying he wanted his pencils and then shouting something about the birds. It didn’t matter how often I told him there were lots of birds where we were going, he just kept on crying.”
“Did you ask him why he was so cross?”
“He wasn’t cross Jodie. He was upset.”
“Isn’t that the same thing with Luke?”
“No it’s not! I told you, he kept on crying whatever we said to him. I guess he just didn’t want to leave the apartment. As it’s the only home he’s ever known I suppose I should have expected it.”
Hearing the irritation in his voice Jodie changed the subject. Now was not the moment to challenge him. There would be plenty of time later to find out what had really upset Luke. In the meantime Marcus needed her support.
By the time they cut the call twenty minutes later she had agreed she and Izzie would visit him and Luke at the end of the following afternoon. She sighed as she switched off the bedside light and slid down under the duvet. Marcus might have moved to the village but it was very far from the end of their difficulties. Now, and for the foreseeable future, they would have Izzie and Luke to cope with on a daily basis.
Staring into the darkness she recalled everything she had learned about autism over the years and wondered again what was actually at the bottom of Luke’s tantrum. Whatever it was, she was quite sure it had little to do with moving north and everything to do with his precious birds. She thought about the rigid routine of his days and frowned. Izzie was right. Marcus rarely challenged Luke. Instead he did everything he could to avoid trouble by letting him dictate exactly how he wished to spend each minute of every day, and she knew it was wrong. If Luke was ever going to gain some sort of independence he would have to learn how to fit in with other people.
* * *
When Marcus opened the door the following afternoon Jodie was shocked by his appearance. The past couple of weeks had taken their toll, stripping him of weight he didn’t have to spare, and bleaching his tan skin to a sallow yellow. His smile was the same though, and so was his kiss as he pulled her into his arms.
Izzie squeezed past them with a grin. “I’ll go and find Luke while you two get to know one another all over again.
Too late, Marcus tried to stop her. “Not a good idea Izzie – he’s being difficult today.”
She waved away his concern as she disappeared into the house.
Jodie slipped her hand into his. “Don’t worry. She’s brought him some books about birds. She knows what she’s doing.”
“Well I’m glad someone does.” He tightened his grip on her shoulders as he stared down at her. “I’ve never seen him like this. What am I going to do Jodie?”
“You’re going to leave him to Izzie and show me around your new home.”
“That simple?”
“That simple,” she reached up and kissed him.
His answering smile wiped the tiredness from his face. “In that case let’s start with the bedroom.”
“Let’s not! I want a properly conducted tour with coffee at the end of it.”
“Spoil sport! Come on then. You might even like it enough to want to move in.”
* * *
Apart from a couple of empty bookcases and a few boxes waiting to be unpacked in the sitting room, the house looked remarkably lived in. It also looked exactly like his London apartment. There were the same pictures on the walls, and the bowls and various artifacts he’d picked up on his travels were displayed on the same shelves and tables. He smiled when he saw the surprised expression on her face.
“It’s that money thing again Jodie. The one you disapprove of. A team of people has been sorting everything out for days. You know how Luke is about strangers so they did it before we arrived. They drew up a plan of the apartment and then replicated it as best they could when they unpacked at this end…not that it seems to have helped.”
She frowned as she followed him into the ki
tchen. Keeping everything exactly the same was not going to help Luke. He needed to experience new things…he needed to learn to cope with people. She was still wondering how best to talk to Marcus about it when a stack of Luke’s drawings on the kitchen counter distracted her.
She picked one up and examined it. It was a lifelike picture of a blue tit. Underneath was something that at first glance looked like a series of black scrawls on white paper but which, on closer inspection, proved to be a detailed drawing of a vast number of birds flying in the V shape of a migrating formation.
“Marcus…this is amazing!”
“So it should be. He never does anything else but draw.”
“No, it’s more than that. Look at what he’s done,” she held the piece of paper out to him.
He barely glanced at it as he searched for mugs and spoons in the new kitchen. She stared at him as the truth dawned. He didn’t believe in Luke. He didn’t believe his son was capable of achieving anything. Instead of engaging with him, he protected him. Instead of giving him the sort of choices other parents gave their children. he imposed the sort of routine he knew would keep him occupied and calm. He didn’t give him any challenges.
“I’m going to say hello to Luke while you make the coffee.” She picked up the stack of drawings and walked out of the kitchen before he could reply. Marcus sighed. If she’d decided to take Luke under her wing as well then they were never going to find time to be alone.
* * *
When he carried the coffee into Luke’s sitting room he expected to find his son sprawled across the beanbag he’d refused to leave ever since they arrived. Instead, he was sitting at the table showing his drawings to Jodie while Izzie slouched on the beanbag making a fuss of Blue. For a brief moment his heart contracted. To an outside observer it would look like a normal family scene. Only those on the inside knew about the psychological challenges they all faced.
Jodie smiled her thanks as he placed a mug of coffee at her elbow. “Luke has been telling me about his drawings. He’s been studying the migration patterns of birds leaving the country before winter sets in. He’s even plotted a chart showing their destinations.”
Marcus bent and scratched Blue’s ear so Jodie wouldn’t see his irritation. He didn’t want her to spend their precious time together pandering to Luke. His son had more than enough attention from his team of care workers. Jodie didn’t need to get involved, not when she was so busy worrying about Izzie, as well as working her fingers to the bone at the riding school.
As if she knew what he was thinking, she got up from the table and carried her coffee across to the couch. He sat down beside her and shook his head. “I know you want to help but it’s not worth it. Luke likes it best when he’s left alone to work on his drawings.”
He spoke softly, his voice full of regret, and when Jodie turned to look at him his eyes were full of a weary resignation. With difficulty she held onto her temper because she knew it wasn’t fair to criticize him when she’d only spent a few hours with Luke whereas he’d been living with him for eleven years. With an effort she slipped her hand into his.
“I need to spend time with him now you’ve moved though, and he needs to spend time with Izzie too. We can’t just ignore him Marcus.”
He squeezed her fingers. “I know, and I’m grateful you want to, but don’t expect much in return. You and Izzie have been lucky today because he’s already worn himself out with his tantrums. It won’t always be like this so you’d better prepare yourselves.”
She stared at him for a moment. Then, realizing he was tired and irritable and trying hard not to show it, she leaned forward and kissed his cheek. He slipped his arm around her shoulders and pulled her close, burying his face in her hair.
“I so needed to see you. The past few weeks have been impossible. When Luke wasn’t playing up, the people in California were on the phone demanding more and more of my time, and if it wasn’t them it was the removal people or the builders.”
Jodie snuggled closer as she listened, wishing she could have been there for him instead of living so far away. Still, all that was over now. She might not be prepared to marry him but it wasn’t going to stop her being with him as much as she possibly could. Nor was she going to give up on Luke whatever Marcus said, but now was not the time to tell him that.
* * *
The rest of the afternoon and evening were uneventful. At seven-thirty Mrs. Cotton took Luke away, glad he was ready to slot back into his bedtime routine.
“I don’t know what you did, but I’m very grateful,” she said to Jodie and Izzie as she left the room trailing Luke behind her.
“How did you persuade her to move north with you when all her family live in London?” Izzie asked as the door closed.
“I increased her salary...anyway how do you know where her family live?”
“I asked her. She doesn’t seem too keen about being here Marcus. Do you think she’ll stay or will you just have to keep throwing money at her?”
“That’s none of your business!” Jodie exclaimed, horrified by her sister’s questions, but Marcus just shook his head.
“She’s right Jodie. I do keep throwing money at her but I happen to think she deserves it because looking after Luke day in and day out is not exactly fun.”
Izzie didn’t let up. “It’s not just her though, is it? There are all those other people who care for him.”
“True, but Mrs. Cotton is the key. She manages his program, helps to keep him calm by sticking to his routine, and organizes the daily, weekly and monthly Rota. Without her my life wouldn’t be worth living and nor would Luke’s.”
“What about when she’s had enough and wants to move back near her family? What will you do then?”
“I guess I’ll try to get her to change her mind again. Now, can we talk about something else please? I’ve spent quite enough time thinking about Luke today.”
“Fine by me. What are we having for supper?”
He gave a relieved smile. “How about pizza? The local takeaway stuffed a flyer in the mailbox. I think I put it on the hall table. See if you can find it and order something for all of us.”
Jodie shook her head in disgust as Izzie left the room. “Sorry Marcus. She seems to think she can say whatever she likes to you. Normally she’s a bit more circumspect.”
“Don’t worry about it. She’s had to take a lot of criticism from me during her music sessions so I guess she thinks she can dish it out as well.”
“But it’s not the same.”
“Maybe not, but she needs to be able to stand on her own feet once she starts touring so don’t stop her speaking her mind. It’s what’s going to protect her later on.”
“I hope you’re right because I still don’t like thinking about it. I’ll be a mess when she goes Marcus, you know that don’t you?”
He pulled her closer. “Mmm…and I’ll be around to pick up the pieces.”
She tilted her face up to his. “Promise?”
“I promise, but only if you forget about Luke and Izzie and concentrate on me until the pizza arrives!”
Chapter Twenty-two
Now Marcus had officially moved in Izzie spent most of her time in his studio, sometimes working with him and the other musicians who occasionally joined him, but mostly working on her own as she practiced everything he’d told her. She started writing music too, making up for her lack of formal training by using a computer program he’d downloaded for her. Marcus nodded approvingly whenever he found time to go into the studio, but for the first few weeks he spent most of his time tying up loose ends with his site manager or taking long phone calls from California before making equally long phone calls to his agent.
Jodie was patient. She visited every day; made sure she was available for the occasional evening meal they managed to fit into their busy schedules; and was in apparent agreement with everything he told her. Soothed by her undemanding support and by the fact that at last they could see one another almost every day
even if sleeping together was still a distant possibility, Marcus took his eye off the ball. Hopeful that Luke would soon settle sufficiently for Mrs. Cotton to resume her day-to-day management of his program without any input from him, and equally hopeful he would soon be able to make Jodie see sense and move in with him, he forgot how persistent she could be until he returned from another week in America.
The first thing he noticed when he got out of the car and stretched the kinks from his back were the bird feeders hanging in the trees. When he rather shamefacedly thanked Mrs. Cotton for buying them, knowing he should have remembered how important they were to Luke and bought them himself, he was surprised to discover Jodie was responsible. Frowning slightly he went in search of his son. As usual, he was drawing but, unusually, he was sitting outside on the terrace while he did so instead of at his usual table by the window. His cheeks were pink as if he’d spent a lot of time outdoors in recent days. He was wearing a child’s version of an only too familiar green fleece as well. And his cap was the one Izzie had given him the day they went to the park.
Wondering how best to find out what was going on, he pulled out a chair and sat down. Luke ignored him. He was far too busy shading the undersides of the leaves on the tree he was drawing. Marcus watched him, surprised by the speed of his hand as it flew across the page. He wished Luke could apply that level of skill and concentration to something more useful than drawing birds and trees but he knew it was too much to ask. He was good though. Jodie was right. Even the bird feeder hanging from a twiggy branch was drawn in exquisite detail, and the tiny blue tit hanging upside down as it pecked at the seeds inside was so lifelike it almost looked as if it were moving.
“I like your picture,” he spoke slowly, wondering how best to bring up the subject of Jodie and the birdfeeders. Luke preempted him by offering some unexpected information.
Mending Jodie's Heart (When Paths Meet Book 1) Page 13