He was quiet while they stood in the bathroom for 15 minutes. He stood still while Yoori quietly wiped the dried blood away from his bare upper body.
He was quiet until he couldn't stand the silence anymore.
"Yoori, can’t you say something?" he urged tiredly, looking over his shoulder. Yoori wiped the damp, warm towel over a cut on his shoulder blade. "Are you still upset with me?" His voice was apprehensive. He sounded like a kid. It perturbed her to hear him like this. He sounded so fragile even though he was anything but.
She sighed, circling from behind his back. She stopped right in front of him, the towel whispering over the last dried blood on his hard chest.
"I'm no longer disappointed with you, but I'm still bothered by how you treated me after I told you the truth," she responded bluntly, narrowing her eyes on the ice pack that rested in the sink.
Though it was difficult to stay mad at him, Yoori tried her best to keep the anger flowing. If she were angry, then she wouldn't have to deal with other tempting emotions that were waiting to consume her. It was a lame and cowardly way out of dealing with her feelings but she didn't care.
She picked up the ice pack and pressed it against one of the bigger bruises forming around his right torso.
"Does this hurt?" she asked, hoping the unexpected cold would distract him from trying to get her to talk about her feelings.
Tae Hyun sucked in a sharp breath once the cold ice pack made contact with his skin. His steel-like abs contracted in response.
"No," he lied, his wincing face saying otherwise.
She inwardly snorted at his obvious lie.
Standing there, pressing the ice pack against the area around his torso, Yoori used all the strength she had not to gawk at the sinfully eye catching aphrodisiac before her. She was so frazzled with her thoughts that she had less self-control than she would normally possess. She couldn't stop the hitch in her breath whenever she caught sight of the contours of his biceps, the ripples of his washboard abs, and his muscled chest. Even the stupid cuts on his body were adding some special effects to his overall sexual appeal. It also didn't help that wiping the dried blood away with the damp cloth left an angelic glow on his upper body.
Kwon Tae Hyun was a walking enticement and she hated him for that.
Distracting bastard, she thought bitterly, training her eyes on the ice pack instead of on anything else.
"Hey, Choi Yoori," he said firmly, pulling her out of her semi-perverted thoughts. He was unwilling to let the silence prevail. He grabbed the ice pack and threw it into the sink. He turned back and lowered his determined eyes on her. "Stop giving me the silent treatment and tell me what's on your mind."
She frowned, peering up at him. Weakness of the female heart aside, she was ready to address all that had been running through her mind. Only one dreadful thought prevailed in her busy mind anyway.
"Did you think telling me that you never left me would make everything okay?" she asked blithely, fighting to keep her voice from breaking. She had to bring up the one topic that led to this whole nightmare. "You walked out because you were disgusted with the fact that I'm An Soo Jin. That fact hasn't changed—"
"Wait a second," he interrupted, his eyes enlarged in disbelief. He looked flabbergasted. "You thought I left because I was disgusted?"
She bounced her head as if it was the obvious answer. "I could tell by how you were looking at me last night." Her tone was colder and more resentful as she instinctively backed away from him.
Her actions were stalled when she felt Tae Hyun rest his hands on her hips.
He shook his head and effortlessly pulled her closer to him. "There were a million things running through my head that night…" His eyes held hers. "But being disgusted with you for being An Soo Jin was never one of them." He furrowed his brows as if he couldn't believe her reasoning. "I mean…why would I be disgusted? I didn't even know the girl!"
"Then you should've told me that when I was trying to talk to you last night, you mute!" she shouted impatiently. It wasn't like he gave her much to go on last night. Regardless of the relief that he didn’t leave her because he was disgusted with her, it still wasn't a sufficient answer for her. She glared at him furiously. “What made you leave then?"
He awkwardly looked away, visibly hesitant with divulging in that information.
"See?” she pointed out. “You're a mute again!"
Having had it with his silence, she struggled to pull herself away from him. She was getting so angry that she didn't even want to be around him anymore.
Despite her objection to his presence, Tae Hyun's grip on her moved to her waist and tightened. It wasn't strong enough to hurt her but it was strong enough to hold her in place.
"Let go!" she shouted at the top of her lungs. "Let g—"
"You weren't the only one who opened your heart last night, Yoori!" he finally blurted out.
She stopped her fighting when his words froze over her.
A light of vulnerability plagued his eyes. He continued to speak, his arms encircled around her waist. Emotions poured out of his once reserved persona.
"Before things got worse last night, I opened my heart up to you as well."
She distinctly recalled him getting ready to ask her out on a dinner date…
"You asked me why I acted the way I did. I acted that way because I found out you were An Soo Jin."
Yoori looked away, but not before Tae Hyun reached out, gently placed his fingers under her chin and guided her gaze back to him.
"It was never because she was in the opposing gang and it was never because I felt threatened by her," he explained to her, lowering his hand and returning it to her waist after he claimed her undivided attention.
"Why then?" she asked, her patience soaring away with the emptiness of the night. "Why would you leave me if it wasn't because you were disgusted with her or because she was in the opposing gang?"
"Because I care about you!" he shouted, effectively silencing her. He stared deep into her eyes. "Isn't it obvious? I—"
A bout of silence consumed him when the vocalization of his own words hung over him like rain clouds.
"Holy fucking shit," he breathed faintly, so faint that Yoori could scarcely hear him.
His hands loosened from around her waist. He turned away from her. His fingers ran through his hair in shock. He looked disoriented, like he couldn't believe he allowed those words out of his mouth. His distressed eyes flickered to his reflection in the mirror. Yoori wasn't sure what he was thinking about, and what he realized, but Tae Hyun seemed at peace with himself when he returned his gaze to her. There was no more reservation in his eyes, only genuine sincerity. He swallowed tightly, stepping closer to her. His visage was flushed with more vulnerability than she had ever seen.
He went on, his voice gentle yet throbbing with resolution. "I care about you…so much more than I ever should. I have no idea what happened to me but I can't shake the fact that you mean something to me."
He smiled dryly to himself. He, too, did not believe the predicament he found himself in. He looked tempted to reach out and hold her again, but he restrained himself.
"I was never like this, you know? I'm always rational...but whenever I'm around you, I'm the most irrational idiot there is. I could have 10 guys pointing rifles at my head and none of that would ever equate to the fear I felt when you told me you were An Soo Jin."
"It shouldn't matter," Yoori vocalized quietly, killing the inclination to melt under Tae Hyun's previous words.
Be strong, Yoori, she urged herself, her eyes sterner than ever – even when her heart was melting all the anger away.
"No, it did," he interjected. "It did because Choi Yoori wouldn't leave me…but An Soo Jin would." Tae Hyun elaborated when he saw the quizzical look on her face. "It was the coward’s way out and I'll be the first to admit it," he started remorsefully. "What I did was wrong. I wanted to save myself the risk of caring about someone who would end up leaving me. I want
ed to save myself before I dug myself in too deep. That was why I asked you why you're no longer in denial – that was why I walked out on you when you told me you were remembering everything again. If I wanted to save myself from the pain of dealing with you leaving me after you get your memories, then I would have to leave you as soon as possible. That was why I took off."
Yoori's emotional eyes held his gaze as Tae Hyun went on.
"When I was going down those stairs…all I could think about was you. I underestimated how much I've grown to care for you. All I could think about was that I should be in there with you – I should be there for you. So I came back for you and here I am now." He swallowed roughly, uncomfortable but still allowing the next string of words to escape his lips. "It was never because I didn't care about you. It was because I realized then that...I may care too much."
He exhaled deeply. The muscles of his jaw clenched, indicating to her that sharing all of this was one of the most difficult things he ever had to do. He was reeling from it.
Yoori, on the other hand, was a bit more demure with her reaction.
She gazed up at Tae Hyun, completely speechless. She had never felt so overwhelmed. It was the first time in their relationship that Tae Hyun had been so truthful with her. It was the first time he told her how he felt about her. There was a myriad of conflicting emotions rioting inside her, but the one emotion that seemed to easily prevail was the one that compelled her to let go of her inhibitions, run into his arms and melt into his hold.
She realized how ridiculous it was that she could easily go from hating Tae Hyun, to being disappointed with him, and to wanting to be in his arms. And why? Because, after months of being around each other, he had finally uttered the words she had hoped for? Was it even a big deal? So what if he cared? She had always known that. The only thing that was still unknown was how deep that care went.
Yoori bit her lips at the host of thoughts and emotions lingering within her.
It would've been the perfect moment to express her own feelings to Tae Hyun but Yoori chose not to. She was broken from the night prior and she wasn't willing to put herself in that same vulnerable situation again. For the time being, she'd prefer to remain oblivious to the obvious signs and sexual tensions in life. She wanted to go back to the way things were with Tae Hyun. She wanted to be carefree and aloof with him again.
Yeah, she confirmed in her mind. Yeah, she'd do that. It would be less of a headache and it would prevent any further disappointment in her mending heart.
Hopefully Tae Hyun would play along...
"I'm still mad at you," she finally whispered, holding back a smile. She folded her arms across her chest. She didn't mean it though. It was just something to say.
If the relaxed nerves within his body were any indication, then it seemed that Tae Hyun was relieved that they didn't dig deeper into the wave of truth that he showered over her. Clearing his throat, he nodded, very much relieved. She knew that Tae Hyun could detect the playful sparkle in her eyes and that she had forgiven him. With a hidden smile on his own face, he reverted back to being his usual self.
"And you should be," Tae Hyun agreed, the playful glint of his own eyes reappearing once he saw that the carefree and spunky personality of Yoori had returned. "You have every right to be."
She smirked at the grin that washed across his face. He seemed so relieved that they were fine again. She wanted to be evil and wipe that smile off his face.
"So you agree that you deserve to be punished?"
As expected, and much to Yoori's secret delight, his smile faded. Though his eyes pooled with worry, he nodded apprehensively. His arms casually wrapped around her waist again.
"Just don't give me the cold shoulder."
Yoori feigned a scoff when she pulled away from Tae Hyun. How dare he subtly try to seduce her so that she wouldn't punish him severely?
But damn...
She stared at him longingly, still feeling the warmth of his hold, even though he wasn't even touching her. The speed at which her heart raced was becoming unbearable for her. Tae Hyun made her weak in the knees, the mind, and in the heart. Even his smallest gestures of touching her and speaking softly to her were making her crazy with attraction for him.
Was this the charm he stated would make her pounce on him if he should ever throw it her way? Yoori wasn't sure but she had a distinct feeling that it was merely the tip of what he could do to make her melt in his arms.
"I'll figure out what to do with you," she said sternly. It was hard to keep her voice firm with him when he was staring at her with his puppy dog eyes.
Fucking Tae Hyun, she thought bitterly, her anger subsiding. Whether he was making fun of her or throwing his reserved charms at her, he was a damn tease all the same. A damn tease who would never fail to take her breath (and sanity) away.
"Well, I guess this is all over and done with then," she concluded tiredly. She walked past Tae Hyun, whose gaze followed her like a shadow. She turned off the lights to the bathroom. "Just don't piss me off for the time being or you're in for a world of hell. You got it, Snob?"
"Got it, Brat," he pleasantly complied when she stepped into the dim hallway.
Yoori was happy, relieved. She was happy they were able to put these troublesome matters to rest and move on. She thought everything was done and over with for the night until Tae Hyun decided there was another matter he wanted to resolve.
She was in the process of marching into the bedroom when she felt a pair of strong arms wrap themselves from behind her. With the scent of his cologne enrapturing her, he wrapped his arms faintly over her arms and rested his hold just above her chest. Gently, very gently, he pulled her closer to where no space remained between them. She could feel the faint, synchronized motion of his breathing chest. His breathing chest caressed her senses and caused difficulties for her own breathing. There was no reservation in his hold.
Though Yoori froze in her stance, there was nothing paralyzing in terms of all the other effects Tae Hyun's unexpected touch had on her body.
A multitude of heated emotions coursed through her like delighted electricity. Her heartbeat tripled in speed. Her eyes were widened with passion and desire. Her breathing grew shallow, the air around her somehow not being enough to sustain her weakened knees. The heat of Tae Hyun's embrace warmed and excited her immensely.
All these side effects grew worse when Tae Hyun lowered his head and rested his chin onto her left shoulder. It grew more unbearable when he nuzzled himself into the nook of her neck, his strong arms veiling her, holding onto her as she struggled to keep herself from teetering between dream and reality.
Am I dreaming again? she asked herself.
He breathed gently into her neck, answering her unspoken question and telling her it was indeed real.
The feel of him, however much shock it placed through her small frame, felt peaceful to her too. It felt…wonderful being embraced by him like that. The seconds he held her felt like blissful eternities. It was the same feeling she had when she danced with him under the gazebo. It was the same feeling she had when they kissed. It was one of those moments where everything stood still and all that existed in the world was them. It all felt magical and it all felt right.
He said nothing as he held her but she somehow heard his words all the same.
I'm sorry. She could hear him apologizing to her for walking out last night. I'm sorry. His hold on her grew stronger with care and she could hear him saying how sorry he was that he wasn't there for her when he should've been. I'm sorry. She could hear him assuring her that he'd do everything in his power to make it up to her, to overshadow his shortcomings of that night.
As her means of nodding in understanding, she lifted her hands and crossed it over his arms, locking him there with her. A smile touched her lips when she rested her cheek against the foundation of his arm.
Would it be selfish and naïve of her to want this moment to last forever?
The apartment dimmed while
they stood there. The only being that accompanied them was the radiance of the moonlight on the tiles surrounding them. A certain stillness of life veiled over them, the only sound being the harmonic breathing rooted between Yoori and Tae Hyun.
Such serenity dispersed when Tae Hyun moved his lips near her ear and allowed his warm breath to tickle her senses.
"I'm not too sure what's going on with me and why I'm acting the way that I am…" he whispered slowly, uncertainly. "The only thing I know is that I can't leave you. Even when I tried, I came back. Against all rationale, I came back."
He fell silent. She wasn't sure if it was to gather his thoughts or his nerves but he only took a moment before his enthralling voice drew closer to her ear. She could feel a reassuring smile – one that stole every ounce of her breath – ignite unto his lips as he said words that would forever ingrain themselves in her heart.
"I just wanted you to know that no matter where life takes me, no matter the distance, no matter the length of time, no matter the obstacles…I'll always come back to you. Even if I, myself, am not sure if I'll come back…in the end, I'll always come back. ‘Cause that's the thing about boomerangs, right? They come back even if they feel they shouldn't, they come back even if the world tries to stop them, they come back because they ultimately know where they belong...and who they belong to."
If he wasn't holding her with such care, then Yoori would've slid to the floor and melted into a puddle of goo. To say that her breath was taken away was an understatement. What he said touched her…more than he'd ever know, more than she'd ever know.
Breathe in...
Breathe out...
Breathe in...
Breathe out...
Awkwardness began to take over and Yoori was speechless. She didn’t know how to respond to his incredible words. Her heart warmed in elatedness. It urged her to respond with something that told him of how she felt. Equally as pressing as her eager heart was her rational mind, which had already started to build the defenses around her. As sweet as it was, she wasn't ready to give her genuine response to it. She wasn't ready to get hurt again. She wasn't ready...which meant that the next words out of her mouth were as awkward and unromantic as a drunken slob's.
The Fall of Gods (A Welcome to the Underworld Novel, Book 2) Page 21