He straddled me and threw the knife down. “You’re dead!”
He hauled me up, and said, “Again. This time, you need to react; at least do something!”
I ground my teeth together. Oh, so he wanted a reaction? He came at me with the knife lowered, and I dodged to the side just as the blade would have stabbed me. He swung again, and I pushed his arm to one side and kneed him in the balls as hard as I could. He dropped like a rock. Bull’s eye!
I kicked the knife away and pressed my heel into his wrist for good measure. Just enough pressure to know I was there… I stood there happily gloating for a minute until I realized he wasn’t making any noise at all.
“Sean?”
“Come on, stop milking it! You’re not that hurt!”
Silence. I couldn’t see his face because it was turned away from me. Was he breathing? Uncertain, I knelt down to check on him. As soon as I bent over, he grabbed me by both arms and flung me over his body and then rolled on top of me pinning me to the ground. He shoved another plastic knife against my throat. His cheek pressed against mine as he pressed the knife. Sweat dripped into my eyes and burned like fire. His breathing was harsh while mine was non-existent. He’d knocked the wind out of me. My mouth opened and shut like a fish out of water.
“What the hell, dude? Get off her, you tool. Are you trying to really kill her?” Dec interrupted my death scene.
Swearing softly, Sean rolled off in one fluid motion. My rescuer offered to give me mouth-to-mouth if it would help. Then he made kissing noises in my ear. I inhaled sharply as I tried to laugh at him. Wheezing, I sat up and glared twin holes into Sean’s back. So he wants to play rough, does he? I growled and launched myself against his legs. He toppled like a tree, and I was on him like a vine. Before he could throw me off, I skewered him like a shish kebab. Oh, he was so dead. Oh, yeah. To add insult to injury, I stood back and aimed a fake kick at his head. Then I danced my way back to Dec who gave me a high five and a down low.
“I heard you took down your trainer today, princess,” Killian commented over dinner that night.
“He had it coming.”
“No doubt.”
“She was a rock star!” Dec added loyally.
Sean grumbled and took his plate into the kitchen. He was in a crappy mood. He was still dreaming, and the dreams were getting more intense. Strangely, he still wouldn’t admit he was dreaming. Lack of sleep was taking a toll on him though. His eyes were ringed with purple shadows. He was exhausted by the end of the day but still pushed himself to teach me. Frowning, I followed him to the kitchen. He was sitting on the counter with his eyes closed and head back in a stretch.
“Come to bed with me?” I tugged at his hand, and he followed.
I curled against his side and lay my head on his chest. He hadn’t said a word to me tonight. What was going on here? Was he really mad at me? It wasn’t like him to be this quiet. I scooted up so I was level with his ear and whispered, “Forgive me?”
He wrapped his arms around me and absently rubbed his thumb down my neck. “Forgive you? Why? You did exactly what you should do. I think the real question is do you forgive me. I got carried away. I didn’t mean to hurt you.”
“There’s nothing to forgive. You’re just trying to make me stronger. I get it. You worry about me, but you shouldn’t, you know. I’ll be okay. Let’s just forget about it. I have other things on my mind right now.”
“You’re insatiable. I think I’ve created a monster.” His lips followed the same trail as his thumb. A few minutes later, he rested his chin on my thigh, and asked, “Are you purring?”
The dream was gone, but I held fragments of it behind my closed eyes. Like a kaleidoscope, the green and black shifted and changed in tiny cells. They formed a beautiful black and green symmetrical pattern that was only ruined by a singular discordant flash of blinding white. I hovered in that magical state between sleep and wakefulness and forced my sight to reach beyond the tiny cells. What if I could pull away the borders to open the image up as it was meant to be seen outside of a dream? Breathing carefully, I dismantled the edges piece by piece. As each cell was released, the nonsensical colors took shape as a green forest in the dark of night. The sky sparkled with millions of stars. I marveled at the brilliance of the tiny balls of gas when a flash nearer to me caught my attention. Just outside my vision, a vivid white light expanded and contracted with greater intensity. The light exploded, and my vision went dark.
“Slowly now, come back to me. Open your eyes.”
I opened my eyes, exhaling slowly. My hand was shaking, and Killian steadied it.
“Good girl. Now breathe slowly until you feel balanced again.”
“Well?” I asked.
He peered into my face, studying my eyes for damages, and sat back on his heels. “It’s much better this time. You still have color, and you controlled your breathing. Both good signs, I think. Your eyes look freaked out though. Maybe you could blink now; you’re scaring the wildlife.” He gestured toward a squirrel that was peeking nervously from behind a branch above us.
In the back of the property, I’d found a little space surrounded by maple trees with a wide patch of fresh grass in the center. Too small to be a real meadow, it was perfect for my lessons. Every other day, I came here and worked on refining my intuition. Some days I came alone and meditated. During meditation, I opened my mind to any premonitions or dreams that would come. No premonitions had shown up so far. Dreams came often and sometimes nothing came at all. The cream-colored room in my mind sat empty and calm. Killian came with me every few days. In his way, he was a natural teacher. He was extremely patient and relaxed while we worked through the exercises he designed.
“What do you remember about the dream?” he asked.
I shrugged. “Green forest, starry sky, explosion.”
He was thoughtful for a moment, and admitted, “I caught the explosion in your eyes. Did you see what it was?”
“You did what? How did you see that?”
It was his turn to shrug. “I always watch your eyes when you slip away like that. If your eyes are partially open, I can see your visions too. I only saw a bright flash.”
“That is so cool.”
Intrigued with this new information, we lost track of time, brainstorming possible causes and reasons for this connection between us. It was fascinating how I was connected to each of them. Dec could hear my voice, Killian could hear my thoughts and see my visions, and I was becoming more convinced that Sean was connected to the core of who I am… He shared my soul. What did it all mean?
Later that night, we made plans to go into town for pizza and some socializing. I missed my friends and wanted to be a normal person for a few hours. Ricki and Dani were meeting us at The Angry Lizard. I hoped they’d bring Kevin and Aric. I missed them too. I twirled in front of the mirror to check the effect of the skirt I was wearing. It was very short and airy with layers of white cotton. It floated around me when I twirled. It was hot tonight so I wore a fitted purple tank top and sandals. The only jewelry I wore was my locket. I never took it off.
I curtseyed in front of Sean. “Well?”
His eyes gleamed with pride as he took in my flushed face and bare legs. “Beautiful! Too beautiful to go out! Let’s stay here…” He pulled me up for a long lingering kiss that made me dizzy and overheated.
Sean was still looking smug as we drove into town. Killian had taken one look at me and pressed his lips together. With a shake of his head, he got into the driver’s seat. It was odd riding in a car with all three of them. We’d never gone out together before. Killian rarely showed up, and if he did, he stayed a few minutes and then left. Socializing wasn’t really his thing. For the past year, Killian was usually away on a mission and hadn’t been out with us at all.
As Killian parked the car, a small group of boys watched us with interest. Didn’t they realize they would never win a fight with their pants around their knees and their shoes untied? When Dec and Sean st
epped out of the car, their cocky expressions went blank. When Killian stepped out, they suddenly found something else to gawk at.
Dani was the first to spot us. She was glowing in a normal healthy way tonight. She had a pretty yellow flower tucked behind her ear and wore a sheer peasant top with cut-off jeans. She was adorable. I spotted Aric lounging against her table and understood the glow. I headed over to see them with a smile of my own. Sean and Dec moved with more purpose and took a good look around the restaurant before coming over to us. I noticed that Dec angled himself so he could see the back door. They were never off-duty when we left the farmhouse. With Dagin’s truce dissolved, it was open warfare. We never knew when we’d run into one of Dagin’s crew. They liked to surprise us. Killian reappeared from checking the bathroom and straddled a stool. I bit my cheek as it registered that he was going to hang out with us. Aric stiffened with tension and Dani’s eyes widened with surprise. Before I could say anything, Ricki, Kevin, and Tyler strolled in. They took one look at us and froze. Geez, what is everyone’s problem tonight?
Sean whispered, “Pool?”
“Good idea. Hey, Killian, come play a game with me?” I headed towards the far pool table. Nonplussed, he played along.
“Is this necessary?” He smiled in his best harmless way as he racked up the balls.
“You look like the big bad wolf when you smile like that!” I broke into giggles at my own joke.
He smiled a real smile then and actually looked human. Maybe I was crazy, but I loved this complicated creature that scared the hell out of mere mortals. I understood their fear, but he was on their side. He risked his life constantly for them. They just didn’t know it. It wasn’t fair.
Dangerous thoughts, princess. Moving lazily, he chalked the tip of the stick and waved me to go first.
“Mica, are you going to tell me what’s going on or what?” Ricki wasn’t one to sugarcoat anything.
I lined up my shot and scratched. Damn it. I sucked at pool. “What are you asking about, Ricki?”
Killian took his shot, and of course, the ball went into the pocket. He was killing me. The night wasn’t a total loss. I did manage to get him to laugh and smile and look human so my friends felt safe staying in the same building with him. Ricki was too intent on grilling me to let him intimidate her right now. Besides she once threatened to screw him in a cave… She frowned at Sean and rephrased her concerns.
“Are you happy with him?” She glanced at Sean under her lashes.
Shocked, I said, “What kind of a question is that? I’m deliriously happy with him! Why would you ask that?” My voice rose, and Sean and Dec both glanced over.
Not done yet, she continued, “You flinch every time he tries to touch you, and you have bruises on both of your arms…” she trailed off and faced me. “He’s… they… they’re all so…”
Straightening stiffly, I filled in the blanks. “Protective? How about strong or kind? Maybe those are the words you’re looking for!”
Killian’s lips twitched as he lined up another shot. I started to say something more when Sean came up behind me. He draped an arm around my shoulder, and I sank against him gratefully. With a puzzled half-smile, he kissed me and asked what was going on. Ricki turned red, and Killian twitched again. What was wrong with him? Then I heard him chuckling inside my head. He was trying to send his thoughts but couldn’t stop laughing to focus them. Was he counting? Smiling as naturally as I could at Sean, I was trying to tell Killian to shut up when I realized what he was laughing about. My shoulders were tingling and the feeling was spreading down my back. Ugh! Not now! Shit. Killian finally burst into laughter, causing everyone to stare at him long enough for me to run to the bathroom.
When I reappeared, Dec grinned at me, and whispered, “Girl, you’ve got to get a grip on that! You can’t bust out in light every time he touches you. It’s not natural!”
I guess the ice was broken because Tyler was playing pool with Aric, Sean and Dani. Killian leaned against the bar nursing a beer. Kevin and Ricki were at the table. She was crying. Kevin glared at me and Dec as we came over. I inhaled and hesitated. Dec gave me a gentle nudge and reminded me that Ricki loved me. Okay, good point. I can do this. I’ll just have to be creative.
“I have bruises because I’m learning Krav Maga. I can’t learn without a partner and bruises happen. Sean isn’t abusing or controlling me in any way. I flinched when he reached for me that day because I was mugged in Quebec and am still a little jumpy.” I took another deep breath and plunged ahead. “If he’s protective, it’s because he’s seen me bleed. You don’t know this, but he… they… all three of them, have pulled me out of Scott’s hands more than once.”
She was dumbfounded and shook her head in denial. ”When? I didn’t know.”
“No, you didn’t know. I didn’t tell you, and they respect me too much to talk about it. All you need to know is they all care about me and would never hurt me. Look at them! Do they seem dangerous to you?”
Sean was laughing at Dani’s bad shot. Dec threw out his best dimply smile at her. No, they didn’t look dangerous just then. I hugged Ricki and grimaced as she accidently squeezed one of my many bruises. I have got to learn how to heal myself…
Days later I got my chance. Sean and I just finished another brutal session, and I was sweating like a pig and sucking in oxygen. The air in the basement was stuffy, and I gulped at it like it was water. Unfazed by the workout, he tapped his fingers on his thigh and reviewed my progress. I’d learned to disarm a gunman, dodge a knife attack and break someone’s neck so I expected some praise.
“You have to do more, babe. You’re not giving me everything you’ve got. In real life, you’d be dead ten times over.”
My face fell. “You’re kidding, right?”
“Do I look like I’m kidding?”
Frustrated, I threw a right hook at the punching bag. “Do you think I’m not taking this seriously? I’m working as hard as I can!” I punched the bag again. “I’m not you!”
In two strides he crossed over to me and blocked my next swing. Holding my fist inside of his, he said, “No, you’re not me! That’s the problem--you’re still too vulnerable. Do you have any idea how easy it is to kill a fragile human?” His voice was low and silky.
Still holding my fist, he lightly touched my bare stomach with his other hand. “One small blade right here would do it. Or here, or here.” He trailed his fingers over my kidneys, my heart. My heart pounded through his palm as he ran through the many ways a human can die. I was hypnotized when he finally wrapped his fingers around my neck and looked into my eyes. “Give me more!”
We were back on the mats again, and I had a new plan. Raphael’s words echoed in my head: Use your strengths to become stronger. Instead of lunging at him, I stood very still and reached out to his mind. Eyes slightly closed, I waited for his attack. It came almost immediately. He feigned a lunge to my right side, but then dove into my legs. I jumped to the right, and he hit the floor and rolled. Back in a crouch, he aimed a rib-cracking kick at my side. At the last second, I twisted so his foot barely grazed me. I flipped backwards and then tried to sweep his legs, but he blocked me and I fell hard to the mat. He used this to his advantage by yanking my legs out from under me and flinging me several feet to one side. I threw my hands out to stop my fall and landed hard on my elbow. The crack was excruciating. I collapsed on my face with a cry.
“I heard that. You okay?” he asked.
I think not. I moaned and rolled onto my back. I gave him a weak smile. “I think I broke my elbow… Ow.”
Being the excellent boyfriend that he is, he carried me upstairs to the living room. After getting some ice, he left me to find Dec. My favorite healer took one look at the black and blue swollen mess and declared it was time for me to heal myself. Grinning at my dismay, he logically argued that I couldn’t practice healing myself unless I was really hurt. This was a perfect opportunity. He was right. It hurt--a lot! I didn’t share his enthusiasm.
I wanted him to fix it and fix it now. I didn’t get my way. Instead, I found myself lying on the floor with my poor elbow resting on a bag of ice because the pain kept me from focusing.
“This is really very easy. Close your eyes and imagine your energy inside of you. Picture the flow like a current that passes through your blood… your muscles. Do you see it?”
I murmured that I did. He continued softly, “Good. Now picture it surrounding your whole body… arms, legs, head, everything. Okay?”
I nodded. My body was tingling and warm all over. I cracked open my eyes. The faint glow of energy enveloped me like a cocoon.
Dec made a small sound of approval, and said, “You’re doing excellent. I can see what you’re doing. You’re controlling it, aren’t you? Now guide that energy to your elbow. Focus it on the break.”
I tried to picture the energy pouring into my arm and then surrounding my elbow. It wasn’t that easy though. The image wavered, and the energy flowed back around the outline of my body instead of into my elbow. It was like pouring water on top of oil… It kept trying to separate.
Dec encouraged, “Focus, Mica. You have the power. You have the will. Concentrate.”
Inhaling deeply, I re-attacked. This time, the energy wrapped around my elbow and stayed put. Okay, so now what?
“Okay, now imagine the break is knitting back together. Picture the healing in your mind as you keep the energy focused. You’ll see when you’re healed.”
I did as he said and gradually the bones straightened and knit back together. The process was intense though. My brain was exhausted with the effort, and I finally gave up and fell asleep.
The clanking of dishes woke me up. I wandered into the kitchen to see what was being destroyed. Lounging against the doorway, I smiled to myself. Dec and Sean were cooking dinner, and it actually smelled good. Sean spotted me and waved me over.
“Hey, come and try this.” He held up a fork of grilled chicken.
The Lost Soul Trilogy (Primani Book 5) Page 26