The Beast
By Alianne Donnelly
Copyright 2012 Alianne Donnelly
Smashwords Edition
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This is a work of fiction. The characters, incidents and dialogues in this book are of the author’s imagination and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblance to actual events or persons, living or dead, is completely coincidental.
Table of Contents
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen
Chapter Fifteen
Chapter Sixteen
Chapter Seventeen
Chapter Eighteen
About The Author
Connect With Alianne
Chapter One
Don’t go past the anteroom, he warned me, claws worrying his tattered shirt. You cannot trust anything that comes out of his mouth. Promise me, Lysette, promise you’ll remember it’s not me.
I promised.
I remember my vow as I lay a shaky hand on the door’s handle. The guard is in the nook, in place of one of the armors. He nods to me in encouragement, but I know he is wary. He knows what is inside that room, and, like his master, he does not want me to see it.
But I must.
I worry, but not enough to turn back. I have seen this man, my Beast, in the midst of a rage, terrible fangs flashing as he roared to the skies. I have seen his vicious strength as he brought down wild animals in defense of me. I can look upon his monstrous visage now and see the gentle soul that dwells inside.
If I can do that, I need to do this, too.
I wish you would reconsider.
I didn’t. I cannot.
I have already accepted everything else about my Beast. Though his claws frightened me at first, they have never harmed me, nor have his fangs. Though he is giant, in height and strength, he takes such care when he moves that I no longer worry walking beside him. I have come to love everything he thought would scare me away.
Why should this be any different?
“My lady?” the guard says and I realize I haven’t moved.
“I am all right,” I tell him. He is here to keep me safe, and I can see by the look in his eyes that he is prepared to do his duty. He has orders to put my life above his master’s and, though it will pain him, he will do what he must if it should come to that.
It worries me far more than the monster waiting beyond this closed door.
I do not let it show.
The handle is rusty and sticks as I unlatch the door. It is heavy, but I manage to push it open enough to pass through. I should close it behind me, I know, but cannot seem to bring myself to do it; the anteroom is fully dark and I crave the light of the hallway to guide me.
I hear breathing farther in the chamber, by the window. My heart throbs and I am unsteady in the pitch black room. I pick my way carefully, move slowly, allowing my eyes to adjust to the darkness.
I can see faint shadows of forms now. The windows I walk toward are giant, but covered with drapes. Even so I can make out the full moon’s glow.
A rustle of movement makes me hesitate.
Chains rattle, and I know. I know he senses me near. My palms are moist. I clutch my skirts tight and make myself move forward.
A sharp inhale. “Ah,” he breathes. “Company.” I scarcely recognize the voice.
The chains tumble to the floor and I hear him moving, dragging them behind, to one side of the room. The spark he makes to light a candle cracks like lightning in the room and makes me flinch. One candle lights another, and another, and still another, until the entire room is aglow. I am at the edge of the anteroom now. This is as far as I am to go.
His back is to me, a ragged shirt hanging on a frame that looks deceptively sparse in it. But where the neck gapes to his shoulder I can see muscle. The massive manacles encircling his wrists and ankles were each too heavy for me to lift when my Beast showed them to me yesterday. But this creature is not hindered by them in the least. Indeed, he adjusts them as I would a delicate bracelet.
My mouth is dry, I am far more nervous than I expected to be.
He stoops to the fireplace, flicks his arm sideways to move the heavy chains out of his way so he can light a fire. “So you finally got the courage,” he says.
“Y-you know who I am?”
He chuckles, more of a scoff. “Oh, I know.” He turns and I see his profile, backlit by the fire. He has long wooden stick in his hand to tend the fire; there are no iron pokers in this room. Nothing he could use to free himself. “You think I don’t hear your sniveling voice every month? You think I don’t smell that disgusting sewer water you call perfume all over my home?” He shoves to his feet and I flinch.
Worse, he notices. Though I cannot see his face clearly, I … sense his amusement.
“I hear the servants talk about you like some goddamned salvation. They all think you’re a saint come to do battle with the Devil himself. Well?” He snaps the chains like a silken train and comes around the massive bed, into the light. “What do you think of him?”
Dark golden strands of hair fall over the face of a fallen angel. Strong jaw, proud nose, dark brows and a hard, twisted mouth. But his eyes… They aren’t what I expected to see. They are empty. Cold. Eyes of a true monster.
Promise me.
I promised. And I can see it now. This is not my Beast.
He sneers. “You’re no savior. I know exactly what you are. You’re the bitch that thinks to banish me. From my own house, no less. Harridan,” he accuses, his fury rising with each word. My Beast could never be so cruel. “Trespasser. Interloper. Whore!” No, this is not my Beast.
But this was my Beast.
Before he became cursed.
Chapter Two
I ran. His roar followed me all the way to the opposite wing. I could still hear him when I locked myself in my room. Or perhaps I merely imagined that.
Now, in the harsh light of day, I stand before a mirror and behold a coward. My gown is blue today, to bring out my eyes, but all I see is the dark tinge beneath them and the sallow paleness of my skin. Sylvie did all she could to make my auburn curls shine, but none of it can hide the truth.
No matter how many times I pinch my cheeks, I cannot bring colour into them. My lips feel dry as dust. I am weary, and ashamed.
My Beast is no doubt waiting for me, but I cannot bear to face him.
Oh, Lysette, why are you here?
I make myself walk down the grand staircase, past the whispering servants with their pitying gazes, into the small solarium where I usually break fast with my host. Today, it is empty.
“Lady Lysette.”
I face Jacques, about to tell him yet again not to address me as a lady, but the look on his face stops me. “Where is he?” I ask.
“The master bid me to send his apologies,” Jacques says. “He regrets he will not be able to perform his duty as host today.”
“His duty?” The word chills me.
I can see in his eyes something is terribly amiss. “I believe,” he says, “the master feels rather the worse for wear after…”
Does he remember? Does he have any recollec
tion at all of our meeting last night? “I understand,” I say. “Can you tell me where he is?”
“I’m afraid he does not wish to be disturbed. The master has instructed me to provide you with anything you wish. He has even made his carriage available to you, if that is what you desire.”
“Did he?” I feel my ire return some pink into my cheeks. The anger is a welcome spark of fire to the cold weight in my gut. “Does he expect me to leave? Is this some sort of fare well?”
Jacques looks away. In all my time here, I have never known him to do such a thing.
“H-has he given up, then?”
The loyal butler swings his head to look at me once more, his eyes wide. He smoothes his expression expertly, but his voice is unsteady when he speaks. “Please understand, my lady. The master has come a ways since his curse. We all see it, though he cannot.” There is deep emotion in his words. He is telling me something he ought not.
I listen.
“But with every rise of the full moon, he is transformed, reminded of what he used to be. He is not allowed to forget. It is part of his punishment to remember his sins, and it has become much more of a burden than…”
So he remembers. I tell Jacques, as bravely as I can, “Please inform your master that his guest is determined to stay. And that I shall see him again tonight.”
Jacques draws himself up, I see relief and joy in him, but though I notice his mouth quirk in a suppressed smile, he says, “Apologies, my lady, but the master has forbidden you to enter his chambers again. He fears it is not safe for you to do so at this time.”
“Because the moon peaks full tonight?”
Jasques inclines his head. “It has proven to be the most … trying in the past.”
“I see.” I smooth my skirts. I need that moment to collect my thoughts. “Then please tell him he has nothing to fear. I shall amuse myself reading this evening.”
“I shall inform the master.” He bows and leaves quietly.
I eat by myself, watching the gardeners tend the blooms outside the window. When I finish, I convey my thanks to the cook and remove myself to the library. It is stunning, filled with books large and small, stories of adventure and love, volumes on every subject known to man. I could spend eternity familiarizing myself with those printed words, though, on this day, I do not allow myself the luxury of exploration. As I have told Jacques, I will be reading tonight.
But I will not be alone.
I choose my book with care.
Chapter Three
Tonight I do not hesitate. I know what awaits me now. I smile at the guard. Louis seems nervous but he squares his shoulders and nods to me. Book in hand, I enter the beast’s lair.
Tonight there is light aplenty to see by. I see the torn rags, the shattered chairs. I see part of the table in the blazing fireplace. I do not let my reaction show.
The man who is my Beast is pacing, nearly snarling. He truly is like a restrained wild thing, snapping his chains, futilely fighting for his freedom. With all his strength and fury he cannot break free. I take heart in that.
“You again,” he snarls, baring his teeth.
I gather my courage and smile. “I have come to sit with you a while.”
The man rushes toward me, but the chains pull him up short. His fingers curl into claws, as though he wants to tear into me. His massive chest rises and falls; his entire body shudders, strains. He is livid. “Get out,” he hisses.
I take a step toward him, but not too close. “You do not frighten me,” I say in the face of his wrath.
Malice burns cold in his blue eyes. “You think you can pull the tiger’s tail while he is chained? I won’t be chained forever. You should fear me, little girl. When I am free, I will show you no mercy.”
“I am sure,” I tell him, pretending that it was the cold draft sending chills down my spine and not his words. “But until then, you are here, and I am not leaving.”
He grinds his teeth so much I can hear it. I’ve no doubt that if he was free, he would make good on his threats and tear me limb from limb.
But he is not free, and that makes me brave. Perhaps even a little reckless. My smile is more confident this time. “Now, will you be a gentleman and offer me a seat, or do I need to look for one myself?”
What he says next does not bear repeating. I swallow a shocked gasp and turn my burning cheeks away as I search for a chair. There isn’t one. I can discern bits and pieces, but not one survived his wrath.
He sneers. His chains drop loudly to the floor as he reaches down, never taking his eyes off me. The chair leg he grasps is still loosely attached to the rest of its body. The chained wild thing stomps on it viciously to sever the connection.
He looks at it, then at me, as though weighing his options. Clearly dissatisfied, he hurls the broken piece of wood onto the voracious flame.
Undaunted, I gather some cushions and make a nest of sorts where the light is bright enough to read by and settle in. “Now then—” I scream as a vase shatters a mere hand width from me. Shards explode all around me, I can feel them rain onto my hair.
“Get out!” he roars.
Louis rushes in, sword drawn, taking a stand between me and the crazed master of this castle.
The chained beast laughs, a sound full of hatred. The guard is no more a threat to him than I am, and he knows it.
“My lady, are you hurt?”
“My lady,” my host mimics cruelly. “Get her out of my sight,” he orders. “She is not to step foot in here again.” He turns to address me directly. “I may not be able to get rid of you, but I fucking well don’t have to look at you while you’re here.”
My heart is racing, but I will it to calm. “I am all right, thank you Louis.”
“Perhaps you should—”
“I am not going anywhere,” I tell him, hardly wincing at my sharp tone. “I have a book to read.”
“I ordered you to remove her!”
Louis lowers his sword, incensing his master beyond reason. “Then may I suggest moving out of the line of fire, my lady?”
I want to argue, but my ungracious host is already reaching for another weapon. “Yes, that is a wonderful idea.”
Louis calls for a mirror, so that I may still see the beast from around the corner. He breaks it immediately, but it remains in place. When everything is ready, Louis leaves and I settle in once more.
“Now then,” I say. “The Little Red Riding Hood.”
I sit until my legs go numb. I read until my voice is hoarse. Through the bluster, the curses and threats, through the constant onslaught of anything and everything he can throw, I read to him.
He screams. Vows to kill me, tear me apart with his bare hands, and things far worse. I believe him. If not for the chains, I know he would cause me every pain a man can possibly inflict on a woman. This is the true beast of the castle.
And for the first time, I truly believe he deserved his curse. I want the monster to suffer, because I know that everything he threatens, he has done before. This… thing, the demon wearing a human mask is so different from the creature I have come to know and love that I can hardly believe they are one and the same.
Tears blur the words on the page. What am I to do?
I can think of nothing else, but to persevere. I cannot fight him on his terms. And so I must be patient and wait him out, somehow coax him to fight by my rules. For now, I have my book.
He has no more things to throw, but I can still hear him raging. I glance up and see dozens of his reflections in the broken mirror. He is tearing his bed apart, linens, mattress, everything to get to the wooden frame.
I duck my head and read on.
The frame shatters. I brace for another wave of attack.
It doesn’t come.
I hear him groan; look up to see him doubled over, clutching his head.
He screams in terrible pain and, before my very eyes, he begins to change.
I lose my breath, the book forgotten. The clock face is
broken, it no longer ticks to tell the time. But I can see faint light vaguely outline the draperies.
Dawn.
The transformation is gruesome and brings me to my feet. My legs nearly buckle, but I stumble to the doorway, terrified for the man-beast in the destroyed room.
He screams and roars, shaking with pain, and grief, and such horrible shame. My heart bleeds, weeping for him. I fall to my knees, helpless to do anything but watch.
When it is finally, blessedly over, my Beast bows his head, looking utterly exhausted. His rumbling breaths are a comfort like nothing I’ve ever known.
I cannot give up on the monster of a man. For this gentle, tormented Beast, I must fight on. I must find a way to free him.
“I’m here,” I sob.
He stops breathing. His massive head raises, and blue eyes meet mine. He looks stunned, disbelieving.
I smile, try to offer what little comfort I can.
My Beast makes a sound like a mortally wounded animal. His leonine face drops into his claws and he turns away from me. “Leave me,” he says.
Utter, soul shattering defeat makes me obey.
Chapter Four
I stand before the gates of Hell for the third time. I cannot say what brings me here tonight. By all rights, I should be fleeing this place, never to look back. Last night inspired a new flare of despair among the castle’s residents. They look at me now, and I know they wonder the same thing I do.
Why is she still here?
Why do this?
Could it work?
They fear me now, and despise me. I give them reason to hope. So long as their master suffers his curse, they, too, are bound to this place. Never to leave, never to change, until he does. The curse is eternal. There is not one man, woman, or child in this place who will tell me how long it has already lasted. And if I build up their hopes for release and fail…
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