by Tara Brown
Moving as fast as I could, I changed into surgery scrubs, a mask, a cap, and booties. I tripled my booties to appear as if I had shoes. Plus, they would help if I ended up walking outside. Three booties would be better than one.
While I didn’t feel smarter than Dorian, since he’d likely been around since the dawn of time, I was smarter than the average teenager. Which meant he would underestimate me.
Scared to leave the confines of the closet, I sat down on the floor for a while, wondering if he could find me with a smell, or if he was able to poof to wherever I was.
Interrupting the worry, my stomach growled like it was hungry but there was a subtle discomfort in there too, as if I had food poisoning.
My brain naturally led me down that path to the one question I would have to find out the hard way on my own: would I still poo?
Never had I met a public toilet I enjoyed so the idea of being on the run and shitting anywhere but home was not a pleasant one.
I couldn’t run into my family without ruining Dorian’s excuse as to where I was. I couldn’t run into Shane without having him drag me back to the hospital bed. I definitely couldn’t run into Dorian without him doing horrid things to me and possibly hurting me in ways I might never heal from. I shivered, remembering his assault in the elevator. I slowly opened the door and peeked out into the quiet and empty hall.
Being bored and stressed in a supply closet wasn’t good for my imagination. I wondered what I would eat if I was a threat to Shane. If I would be like Aleks and need regular food every now and then to be strong, or if like Dorian I ate something else. I wasn’t sure why I was certain Dorian didn’t eat food. The black blood told me he was not exactly functioning inside quite the same way Aleks was. Truth be told though, I had never seen Aleks bleed. It was possible he was full of molasses as well.
The molasses thought was when I knew I’d stayed in the closet too long. I forced myself to step out into the hall and hurry down the emergency stairs toward the bottom floor. I crept down all the floors as fast as I could until I got to the boiler room.
There was steam blowing out of a vent of sorts between the door and me. My bravery was coming to a head as I neared the door. That would be the moment in a scary movie worth its salt, where the bad guy would show up. He would smash me in the head with one of the pipes in the room and drag me behind the boilers to maul me. Or even worse, he would carry my limp body out in a garbage bag, whereupon I would end up in a hole in his basement like Silence of the Lambs.
My heart raced as I scared the ever-loving crap out of myself while still forcing my feet to move like a rat’s, scurrying along the floor. I looked both ways as the safety of my wall ended, and I nearly dove out the door when I saw no one there.
The light from outside blinded me as I made my way up the concrete staircase from the basement. The drizzle of the rain and cars parked all around told me I was probably in the staff parking area. I ran from the building, not even looking. My feet pushed off the cement, driving me out into the parking lot.
When I got to the vehicles, I stopped running and began walking amongst them. I walked until I finally found an unlocked car and climbed inside, taking a breather and sanity check.
I needed to be as far away from there as I could get. I searched the car for money and found about twelve dollars in change along with a pair of black ballet-styled flats in half a size too small. Not being picky, I squeezed my feet into them. In the back I found a blue fleece which obviously belonged to someone bigger than me. I pulled it on over my scrubs to hide the top of them at least. I felt guilty for stealing her things and imagined the owner of the car loved the fleece. I wished I didn’t need to take her stuff, but it was life and death. I hoped if she were there, she would have helped me under the circumstances. I locked her car. It was the least I could do.
Huddled in my new fleece, I continued passing the cars, hoping to find at least one more of them open. It was tough going and security nearly saw me once, but I ducked behind a large SUV and hid for a while. I finally found another open car which had thirty dollars in it and some granola bars in the dash. I stole a hair tie, ditched the cap and mask, and locked the car door before I ran from the parking lot into an alley around the corner.
Pushing away the horrible feeling of vulnerability, I convinced myself I was going to be okay. Everything would be okay.
He wasn’t going to find me.
I looked like a nurse getting off work, not a girl who should be dying from organ failure.
When I got to the bus stop, I boarded the bus that was there and started to breathe again when we drove off. I didn’t feel completely safe until I crossed the center of the city, on my way to the north. I had examined the bus when I boarded, but also when it came time for people to get off and on. I hadn’t seen Dorian anywhere, but I didn’t know what he was capable of.
I watched out the window as my bus made its way to the main transit stop. There I could switch buses and board one for home. I didn’t know what to do, but my best chance of survival was in a place I was comfortable.
When the forty-two dollars ran out, I was hours from home at a random bus stop. I locked myself in a bathroom stall, where I sat and slowly ate my granola bar. I wasn’t hungry, but I wasn’t sure how I would get home or when I would eat again.
Chapter 23
Am I a believer or a wanderer? Does it matter?
According to Google Maps, a person can drive from the bus stop I was stranded at to my town in around three hours and walk it in about two days. I, however, reacted rather well to Dorian’s demon blood and was able to do it in one day. I shaved a bit of time off by running as much as I could. I rarely sweated or got hungry, and I didn’t have to use the bathroom. Which answered the question of random bathroom pooping.
My feet never really hurt, although I wore shoes that were too small, and I didn’t need to sleep, not even a little. I didn’t know what to say about that. I likened myself to one of the Terminators. I walked past the sign for our town and sighed a small measure of relief.
Port Mackenzie was my safe haven in that crazy moment. I walked into town seeing the gas station and knew I had to be very careful. Everyone in town knew me. I didn’t know where to go but decided my own house would be a great place to start.
I crept along backyards, keeping my head down until finally reaching our street. I snuck through the backyards of my neighbors until I reached our fence and climbed over it, again surprised by the strength I seemed to be able to muster. I landed in my backyard just as the sky turned dark. Our house was dark inside. Not a single light was left on.
I wondered where my sister was, where my dad was, but mostly where Dorian was.
Would he sit in my house and wait for me to come home?
Did he know where I lived?
Was he holding my dad and Shane hostage until I came to get them? Or would it be rescue them?
Would he tell them what I had become?
Or would they be dangling from a bridge somewhere, expecting me to save them with my new super strength?
I moved stealthily across the grass to the back door where the hidden key was. I unlocked it and crept inside but didn’t turn any lights on. Instead, I stood there and smelled the air for a second. I was home. My heart was racing, but I couldn’t help but enjoy the moment.
Then I grabbed a drink of water, even though I hadn’t realized I was desperately thirsty. I’d gulped back three huge glasses before I had to pee. I ran to the toilet, assuming it was what life was like for Aleks, doing what he needed when he got the chance. I flushed and ran upstairs to my room to open the bag with my mom’s nightgown so I could take deep breaths. I savored the smell and then put the bag back. I would return for it when I had a place and a plan.
“Mom,” I whispered, glancing around and wishing Aleks would show up. Then I could get the answers I needed about my mom’s death.
Quietly I cursed Dorian under my breath as I grabbed a crayon from my art set and opened
the window to my bedroom. In light yellow crayon, I wrote on the outside windowpane.
I need to see you. Come find me! Check at the beach.
He would see it and know I needed him. I picked out two changes of my usual black clothes and stuffed them into my beach backpack along with a few key items no one would miss. I jumped into the shower and rinsed myself in the dark, not turning any lights on. It was by far the scariest shower I’d ever had.
I expected Dorian or a knife or something to come through the glass door at any second. Before he did, I was clean, dressed, and ready to go fifteen minutes after arriving home.
I grasped the ball cap my gran had bought me a few summers before and stuffed it on my head, tucking my long hair through the back to make a ponytail.
When I locked the house and ran out to the back fence, I paused, unsure of where to go next. Night had fully set in and enveloped the world in darkness. I was grateful for the moonless night as I ran through the woods at the back of our property. I ran until I reached Shane’s house.
His truck was there but that meant nothing. My dad had taken his truck to Portland with Shane. I carefully slipped in around the back of the house, noting it was as dark as my own. Frustrated, I didn’t know what to do. My energy levels were high and I felt fine, but how long did I have? I hadn’t gone through the change yet. I didn’t know anything.
I glanced over at the forest that Shane had carried me from twice. It had only been a few days since I was on my deathbed and here I was, feeling stronger than I ever had and yet still dying.
Or was I?
Maybe my body had reacted badly to the demon blood, and instead of immortality, I had just healed and gotten strong. Maybe I would be fine and could just go on with my regular life. Perhaps I wouldn’t be a threat to anyone.
I wondered if God just felt sorry for me for all the shitty things that had happened and he was giving me a mulligan.
Instead of leaving, I sat down on the back steps of his deck, pondering life and choices. I gazed back at the grass and vaguely remembered how it had felt to lie with Shane under the stars and the way he had looked at me. I loved him. No matter what had happened with Aleks, I couldn’t get Shane out of my mind or heart. The distance from Aleks seemed to allow me the clarity to realize the lure was lust, rather than love. He seemed to have that effect on all women.
A vehicle pulled into the driveway as I heard men’s voices and car doors closed and opened.
I paused, listening.
“Okay. Well, thank you, Shane. I’m sure she’s fine. Like I said, the doctor seemed to be convinced she needed to go there.” My dad’s voice filled the yard.
“Shit,” I whispered and then stopped breathing, realizing I had nowhere to run except the stalker woods, but they scared the life out of me. I sat very still, hoping I would have a few seconds at least to hide.
“I know, Mr. James. I’m really bummed about it. I just can’t believe I never got to say goodbye.” Shane’s voice was full of emotion. He sounded crushed.
“She knows you love her, kiddo. Good luck on your test, son, and if I hear from her, I will call you right away.” My dad used his nickname for me on him. It warmed and broke my heart simultaneously.
“Thanks, sir. Have a good sleep,” Shane called out. His front door closed and I jumped up and ran around the side of the house where the garage was. I froze, hearing him inside the house and then opening the back deck door.
“Hello, are you there?” he asked.
I glanced back, not moving. How did he know I was there?
“Oh okay, yeah. My cell does that too.” He laughed and I breathed a sigh of relief, still not moving as he talked on the phone. He was one corner of the house away from me.
I crept along the side to the front of the house and stood in front of the garage.
“Yeah.” He continued talking, “I need to know where in California is the clinic that does celebrity liver treatments. I know it sounds stupid. But a friend of mine is there, and I just want to know the name of it. Thanks. Yeah, just call this number and leave a message if I’m not here. Thanks, man. I need to find her.”
Dorian hadn’t been prepared for how much Shane loved me. Shane wouldn’t stop until he found me. My heart broke. What had I done?
I considered just revealing myself to Shane and letting the cards fall where they may. The only problem was that I wasn’t sure what I would become, and I didn’t want him to get hurt.
A small part of me wondered if he’d still want me or love me if he knew I was changing in a supernatural way. I didn’t even believe it yet, so he definitely wouldn’t.
What if he ended things between us? I didn’t want to push the envelope. I decided to leave his yard and find somewhere else to haunt until I was sure what I would be.
I walked for a long time, keeping my head down as cars drove past. My brain was stuck thinking about the way things had played out. There were definitely a few things I had to take responsibility for. It hadn’t all been bad luck. Drinking with Giselle because I had humiliated myself with Blake was stupid.
I’d been the girl who spent my entire high school career preparing for college and then blew it in the last four months with some drinking.
My feet stopped when I got to a fork in the road. It was the physical representation of my existence. Left and I left town. Right and I went back.
My heart tugged right but my brain whispered, What if? I needed to face the fact I was homeless.
I knew which way I wanted to go, but I needed to be smarter than that.
But I wasn’t.
I turned, walking carefully in the direction I wanted to go.
As I approached his driveway I slowed to a crawl and silently rounded the corner of the house. I opened the door to the garage with the lock code and slipped through into the hallway. Not making any noise I walked to the stairs to the basement and then crept down them.
In the faint glow of the computer screen in the far corner, Blake played World of Warcraft. I snuck along, trying not to scare him or wake his parents if they were even home, which they hardly ever were. They were lucky he was a calm kid because with the amount of free time he had, he could have been doing all kinds of unsavory things without any hindrance.
He sat hunched over the game, headphones on. I couldn’t make out what he was saying, but I could hear the low hum of talking. I plopped myself down on his leather couch and watched for a moment, missing the feeling of being lost in the game and such trivial things.
He must have gotten the eerie sense someone was watching him because he sat very still for a second and then turned slowly. Seeing me sitting on his couch, he responded, “Hey, Aimes.” He immediately went back to his game, not registering I shouldn’t be in his house.
It took a full minute before he turned again, obviously scared to move as if I might be a ghost coming to say my goodbyes. Nervously, he swung around, peeking at me. “Aimes?”
“Hey.” I waved at him.
“Hey.” He smiled but it wasn’t the peaceful one he had given moments before. Instead, it was tense which made me laugh. “You okay?” he spoke carefully, not getting up from the chair.
“Yeah.” I wanted to cry with relief.
He removed his headphones and looked at me. “For real?”
“Maybe.” I chewed my lower lip. I couldn’t hold back the dam of emotions. It burst free and I lost control.
“Oh my God!” He rushed to my side, holding me. “How did you get here?” He wrapped around me, squeezing the life out of me.
“I ran away.” I cried in sheets, like the cold coastal rain.
It poured out in sobs and heaves.
I had lost it.
“Why?” His shirt was getting soaked where I cried and left different forms of my bodily fluids on it.
“I got scared. I didn’t know where else to go.”
“Scared of what? Where are your dad and Shane?” He pulled me back and his eyes were intense. “Did someone hurt you?”<
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“Sort of but I did it to myself.” I wiped my eyes dry with my sleeves as he passed me a tissue.
He took an extra one for himself and began wiping his shoulder, seeming horrified at the wet mark. “Jeeze, Aimes. Gross.”
“Sorry.” I laughed hard, unable to control myself.
He frowned. “I’m glad you find it so amusing that you’ve left nasal secretions on my shoulder. Dear God.” His fussing over the shirt made me laugh more. He left where I was sitting and sat across from me on the other leather couch. “Why aren’t you at the hospital?”
“I’m better.” I stared at him gravely when I finally found my calm.
“How? Your doctor was convinced you would die en route.”
“Something terrible has happened,” I whispered, wide eyed. “And I don’t know what to do. I’m putting you in terrible danger coming here, but I don’t know where else to go.”
“Aimes, whatever’s going on, we’ll find a rational and sensible solution. I’m still your best friend, even if I haven’t acted much like one.”
“I haven’t either, Blake, and I’m sorry. I shouldn’t care who you date. Being annoyed was petty of me and I’m sorry.”
“No.” He smiled. “I should have told you the truth years ago. Honestly, I thought you knew. I’ve been head over heels for that twit forever.”
“I didn't know.” I exhaled, not smiling. I couldn’t bring myself to smile. I dreaded what was about to happen. The possibilities he would either commit me or kick me out lingered in the air as I started to speak, “Remember when you asked me to just listen and hear the whole story, before I slapped you and walked away?”
“Yeah.” He looked confused.
“I need that same favor. Is that possible?”
“Of course.” He sat back on the couch, getting comfy.
My stomach twisted and turned as my nerves prepared the rest of me for the worst-case scenario. I took a deep breath and started. I watched as his brain translated and diagnosed me as I spoke. He had a scientific reason for everything I said. I ignored his facial expressions and continued speaking until I reached the very end of the story which had landed me on his couch, crying and homeless.