I love how excited everyone gets about the Stanley Cup win, but I’ve never been able to appreciate my win. I never got to celebrate that victory because one of the best days of my life was also the worst day of my life. The high quickly came tumbling down.
“Yeah, I saw it,” Kaelyn says, smiling at me, pride bright in her eyes, but there’s also a hint of sadness because she knows what happened after my win.
“I can’t believe you watched the game, especially because, when I met you, you said you hated hockey,” I tell her.
Her grin widens. “What can I say? You left one hell of an impression on me. And I never said I hated hockey, just that I preferred football.”
“Hmm.” I tease, not convinced.
She punches my arm, but it has zero impact. No, that’s not true. She has an impact, but it’s anything but painful.
“She’s definitely a football girl through and through. Takes after the men in her life,” George says.
Kaelyn focuses her eyes on me, and in a second, I find it hard to catch my breath with her next words.
“I don’t know,” she begins, smiling softly. “I think there’s enough room in my heart for hockey.”
If I wasn’t already seated, the vulnerability in her voice would have knocked me on my ass.
In ten words, she’s just stolen my soul and obliterated my heart.
The Place I Called Home
Kaelyn
Sitting beside Chase at the dinner table at my parents’ is making me happier than I’d care to admit. He fits in effortlessly, and as I look at him laughing at something Nate just said, my heart feels full and in the best way possible. Everyone loves him, and seeing him with a smile while he fills his face with my mom’s incredible cooking is just everything. Well, I say everyone loves him. Jace was being a bit of a dick with him earlier. He’s thawed out a little since then, but I still don’t miss the steel gaze Jace keeps throwing Chase’s way across the table. I’m not sure what his problem is, but Chase doesn’t seem fazed by it. I suppose he’s got bigger problems than a brother being a little protective over his sister. It’s unnecessary though. I’d expect that behavior if I were bringing home a new boyfriend, but we’re just friends.
At least, that’s what I keep telling myself.
Tonight, something feels like it’s shifted between us. I feel unbelievably closer to him, and though I know my feelings for him are moving into dangerous territory, my heart doesn’t seem to care. I know I shouldn’t be letting my heart get carried away like this, especially when he has so much to deal with, but he’s unlike anyone I’ve ever met. I know it will be a while before we can even talk about us being anything more than friends, but for now, I’ll be patient because it’s not every day a girl finds her soul mate. I know he feels it, too, or he wouldn’t be here. He wouldn’t have called me tonight and wouldn’t want me to ease his pain if he didn’t feel something for me. Plus, he’s admitted himself that he’d be with me in a shot if it wasn’t for the nightmare he’s currently living. So, for now, I’ll be whatever he needs me to be. I’m not naive enough to believe I can take his pain away, and I don’t want to. Whatever he is feeling right now and the heartache he’s enduring and the grief that will come after Olivia is gone, he needs to feel that in order to heal.
However, I will be there for him, whether that’s to be a shoulder to cry on, to give loving affection in the form of a hug, or to watch The Big Bang Theory with on a Saturday evening. What I’m feeling for Chase is something that I can’t put a timer on. It doesn’t matter to me how long it takes for us to be together. I’d happily wait a lifetime if it meant I got Chase in the end.
My mom’s voice brings me out of my internal dialogue, and I turn my head back to face her. She’s looking between Chase and me, smiling from ear to ear, and I blush, realizing she just saw me outright staring at Chase. Knowing where my thoughts just were, I know it had to have been quite the dreamy stare.
“Sorry, what did you say?” I ask as I take a bite of creamy mashed potatoes.
She chuckles under her breath before saying, “I was asking about Jo’s wedding. You said she brought the date forward?”
Wow, I totally just zoned out in the middle of talking to my mom. No wonder she’s looking at me with that big-ass smile.
Busted.
“Yeah. They were originally going to get married in June, but they want to get married before the baby comes. They’re getting married on March 3.”
“Where are they planning on having the ceremony?”
Now, this is where I snort. I mean, the setting is romantic, but I also know that it’s the place where they got down and dirty on their first date, so it’s actually more dirty than romantic.
“What so funny?” my mom asks.
I just shake my head. “Nothing, sorry,” I say with a smile, still amused with myself. “They’re having it on the rooftop of the bakery Drew owns. It has fairy lights and an incredible view. They’ve actually started hosting events there—baby showers, engagement parties—so it’s the perfect venue for something small and intimate,” I tell her.
She sighs with contentment. “It sounds wonderful. I thought maybe I’d have been to one of your weddings by now, but I’m still waiting.” She sighs again, but this time, it’s with more dramatics.
Not this shit again. She’s always harping on about how none of us are settled down yet and that, by now, at least one of her five children should be married with kids. It’s the same thing over and over again.
I go to respond when Nate speaks, “It’s such a shame she’s getting married. I always had a thing for Jo. I love a good sister’s-best-friend porno story line.”
I giggle when Chase almost chokes on his potatoes.
My eyes connect with his with a, Yep, we’re the type of family who discusses porn at the dinner table on Christmas Day.
“It’s funny you should say that. She used to have a huge crush on you.”
Nate’s eyes double in size, and wonder fills his face. “Really?”
His question has me busting a gut. “God, no!”
Everyone around the table laughs, and he flips me the bird before stabbing into his beef. The rest of dinner continues in a similar fashion, and I fall in love with the sound of Chase’s laugh every time I hear it. He’s a completely different Chase than the one I greeted at the door an hour ago. He’s more relaxed and laid-back. I guess I’ve succeeded again in making him forget—at least for a little while.
Jace and I picked the short straw with the almighty Christmas wash-up, so we begin to gather up the dinner plates.
“Do you want any help?” Chase asks while rubbing his full stomach with all the delicious food he just devoured.
My mom usually piles our plates up with enough food that you don’t need a second helping, but Chase demolished a second plate.
“No, we’ve got it covered. Just relax.”
“Okay.” He smiles.
For a moment, I become a little lost in the incredible depth of his eyes. God, his eyes are like crystal, clear and beautiful. It’s as if I can see into his soul, and I love what I see.
The sound of someone coughing awakens me from my trance, and I blush when I see Chase smiling at me, an eyebrow cocked with intrigue and amusement. I quickly turn on my feet and head into the kitchen, my arms weighed down with a stack of plates.
I leave Jace to bring in the rest of the dinner plates and cutlery. I place everything I can into the dishwasher before washing everything else by hand. Jace returns, picks up a dishcloth, and begins to dry.
“How did I end up with the task of drying? You know I prefer washing,” he complains, but when I glance at him, I see a sparkle in his eye.
“Because I’m the oldest, and I hate drying, too.”
“That’s such bullshit, and you know it,” he mocks with a laugh.
I just shrug my shoulders with a whatever grin on my face.
“So,” I begin after a few minutes of silence while we have been focused
on the grueling task at hand, “what was with the attitude when I introduced you to Chase earlier?” I ask, handing him a plate.
He gives me a side-glance, frowning.
When he doesn’t say anything and just begins drying the plate, I speak again, “You were really rude to him.”
He heavily sighs. “You really want to get into this now?”
I drop the sponge into the water and turn to him. “Yes. We’re going to get into this now,” I tell him with a no-shit attitude.
His coldness earlier was uncalled for.
“I didn’t think you were into married guys; that’s all.”
“What the hell are you talking about?” I ask, confused.
“I mean, I know you’ve always been free with yourself, but I never thought you’d stoop so low and have an affair with a married man. I saw his ring earlier, Kaelyn,” he bites out.
My stomach drops. He’s wearing his ring again? Since when? It’s ridiculous, but knowing he’s wearing his wedding ring again hurts. Then, I retrace Jace’s words, and that’s when I glare at him for insinuating that I’d ever have an affair. And for calling me free.
Jackass.
“Jesus, it isn’t like that. We’re just friends.”
“Well, does his wife know he’s hanging out with his friend on Christmas Day?”
“It’s complicated,” is all I say because, even though Chase gave me permission to tell my family about Olivia, it still doesn’t seem right, coming from me.
“Complicated how?”
“I’m not getting into it with you because it’s not my place to say.”
“What the hell does that mean?” he argues.
“It means, it’s none of your business.”
His nostrils flare, and he throws the dishcloth on the countertop. “Like hell it’s none of my business. If it involves my sister, I’m gonna make it my business.”
Jesus fucking Christ. All my life, I’ve had to deal with my brothers being overprotective with me, regardless that I’m the oldest, except for Jace. He’s the only one who lets me be and never treats me like I should be wrapped in bubble wrap. He has never been the overprotective brother, so why the fuck have the tables suddenly turned?
I face back to the sink and brace my hands onto the side, dropping my head with a sigh. “Jace, I promised I wouldn’t tell a soul, but please believe me when I say, we’re only friends.” I pivot my head to look at him. “Yes, he’s still technically married, but I promise you, we’re not having an affair. It’s not like that.”
“You just said he’s still technically married. Does that mean, he’s separated from his wife?”
Jesus, he’s not going to let this go, is he?
“Jace, please,” I say, almost as a plea.
His hand comes to rest on my shoulder, and his soft eyes return. The protective brother is gone, and my best friend returns.
“Hey, when have we ever kept secrets from each other?”
“I know, but this isn’t my secret. I mean, he did say I could tell you, but…” I finally relent.
“Well, tell me then.”
I let out a sigh and stand. “Promise me this stays between us okay?”
“Yes, of course.”
I count to three before I speak, “His wife is dying.”
His eyes widen with shock and then quickly turn to horror. “Shit, Kaelyn. What the hell is he doing here with you if his wife is dying?” His protective brother tone slips into place.
I glare at him. “I’ve already told you, it’s not like that,” I snap. “Will you just let me speak, for fuck’s sake?”
He leans his hip against the countertop and folds his arms over his chest. He lets me tell him the whole story. How Chase was filing for divorce, but before he could issue her with the papers, she OD’d on heroin and everything else that has followed during the past six months since. I finish with the terrible news that he received today. When I’m done, Jace just blinks, and when a full minute passes and he doesn’t say a single thing, I turn back to the sink and resume washing the dishes.
After another minute, he finally speaks, “Holy shit. That’s…shit. I had no idea.”
“Well, why would you? Instead, you just assumed I was having an affair with a married man,” I retort. I chance a peek at him and see he looks remorseful.
“What else am I supposed to think when you bring a guy home who’s wearing a wedding ring?”
I nod, understanding where he’s coming from, but I still give him a piece of my mind. “You’re supposed to believe me when I tell you a friend is joining us for Christmas dinner. A friend, Jace.”
He looks at me with a grimace.
“I’m sorry, and I’m sorry for the way I treated him. I’ll apologize.”
“Thank you,” I tell him, appreciating his apology. I focus as I methodically scrub the gravy away from a gravy boat. “You know, today’s the first time he’s worn his ring since he made the decision to divorce her.” Well, at least whenever he’s been in my presence.
“It is Christmas. Maybe he was feeling nostalgic. Especially with the news he got today. It’s got to be tough for him.”
I nod with understanding, yet the thought of him wearing his ring doesn’t feel less painful. Jace’s eyes roam over my face. Although there’s a year between us, we’ve always had a twin bond, and he can always sense my feelings. Right now, he can also feel my pain. He can feel my soul.
“You might not be having an affair with him, but it’s obvious you’re falling in love with him.”
All I can do is nod because it’s the truth. I am falling in love with him, and I think I have been since the very moment I locked eyes on him a year ago.
“Just be careful. He’s really vulnerable right now, and I don’t want you to get mixed up in his grief by giving away your heart to him, only for him to unintentionally break it, okay?”
“I know, and I will. Honestly, I’ve got it under control. He said he wanted a friend, and that’s what I’m being for him—a friend. One day, when he’s got his life back on track, we can try to be more than friends, but for now, that’s all we are, and I understand that. I really do,” I add when he skeptically eyes me.
He takes the sponge from my hand and turns me into him, wrapping his arms around me.
He leans his chin on my head. “Just don’t get your hopes up. His intention was to leave her, divorce her, not to watch her die. Something like that can really break a person. Please be careful.”
I don’t get a chance to reply because, suddenly, the pressure around us gets tighter.
“Group hug!” comes the playful voice of Logan.
A strangled sound comes from my throat, as if I were being squashed to death. “Jesus, Logan, I can’t fucking breathe!” I yell.
He chuckles, and the heaviness eases as he pulls away. I step out of Jace’s hold and take in Logan in his police uniform.
“Do you have to head out soon?” I ask him.
Logan is one of the unfortunate police officers who has to work tonight.
“Now, actually. It might be Christmas, but assholes still roam the streets. Just came in to say bye.” He holds his hand out for a high five, and I smack my hand with his.
“Okay, dude. Be safe.”
He grins. “I always am. I already said bye to Chase, but I told him we should hang out sometime. He’s a really cool guy.”
I smile as he gives Jace a brotherly hug before leaving with a, “Later, bitches.”
I could take offense, but I know he’s talking about Jace, not me. I blink when Jace flicks something wet at my face. When I turn to him, I see he’s taken my place in front of the sink, his hands full of bubbly suds.
“Come on, let’s get these dishes finished!”
The cheeky fucker then grabs the sponge, and I realize I’ve been demoted to drying.
“Asshole,” I playfully murmur, smacking him across the head before taking hold of the dishcloth.
Once we’re finished, we head into the li
ving room.
When I don’t see Chase anywhere, I ask everyone, “Where’s Chase?”
My mom’s the first to speak, “He was a little tired after all the food, so I told him to head to your old room and lie down for a little while.”
“Okay. I’ll go and check on him.”
“Yeah, I bet you will,” comes the suggestive response from Nate.
I just flip him off before walking off. I head upstairs to my old room that still has every one of my teenage belongings with posters of NSYNC and Backstreet Boys still pinned to the pink walls, but I blink with confusion when I don’t see Chase. I check a few of the other rooms, and when I come up empty, I decide to head down to the man cave.
I smile when I see him stretched out on the leather sofa, peacefully sleeping while ESPN plays quietly in the background. Even though I know I should let him rest, I’m unable to resist the pull I feel when it comes to him, and I gently crouch down to his face. His handsome face is smoothed out, and the creased tension he had lining his forehead earlier is gone. His hair fans across his face, his dark hair a little on the shaggy side, indicating he needs a haircut. His warm breath blows along my face, his plump lips drawn apart while he sleeps, and gentle snores come from the back of his throat.
God, everything about him is so beautiful. And I’m not just talking about his attractive looks—even though he’s as dreamy as fuck. His soul, his mind, his heart are so beautiful that being in his presence, in his warmth and brilliance, leaves me completely and utterly breathless, so out of breath that it’s as if I’d just run a marathon. My entire body hums at his nearness, so God knows how it’ll feel when I finally kiss him because I have no doubt that it will be explosive. Our chemistry is the proof of that. Unable to resist, I reach my hand out and brush his hair from out of his eyes. He begins to stir a little, quietly moaning, and my core tightens at the very sound. God, that was sexy. My fingers trail over the soft tendrils of his hair and caress through the strands, initiating more moans to slip from his lips. I gently smile when his eyes flutter open.
My Forever (Our Forever Book 3) Page 20