Nate gets this huge smile on his face.
Nick elbows Nate. “Nice! Surfin’ and babes. Huh? Huh?”
Nate lowers his head, then looks up at me. I quickly turn to Angela, giving her extra tissue for her tears of joy after her good news.
“Congratulations, Angela. You’re going to be on familiar territory. And seeing your family is going to be awesome for you.”
Angela looks at me with tears of joy in her eyes. “Thanks, Jes.”
I shift my gaze back to Ezra. I know that it won’t be that easy for me. I can’t go home like Angela. Home isn’t safe anymore. Plus, it feels like my life there happened so long ago.
Jake takes a folded piece of paper out of his back pocket. “Nick. New York City.”
Nick jumps out of his seat. “Whoo hoo, baby! Yeah! Yeah!” He runs over to Jake and picks him up off the floor in a huge embrace. Nick puts Jake down and starts dancing with him. Nick starts singing Alicia Keys’ song. “…Concrete jungle where dreams are made of…”
Jake looks like a rag doll being pulled here and there by Nick. He rolls his eyes and laughs.
Ezra says, “All right, Nick. We still have one more.”
Nick lets go of Jake. “Jake. I love you, man! We are gonna be NYC roomies!” Nick clears his throat and changes his composure instantly. “All right. I’m done. Sorry, Jes.”
“Jes. Miami, Florida.” Ezra lifts his drink in the gesture of congratulations. “Cheers, Jes.”
Beaches, sand, and warm weather. Hawaii was just a hope. I have never been there. To be honest, I really don’t feel like I belong anywhere in particular after my life transformed without my control. I guess this is my opportunity for my life to begin again. The new beginning of me.
Chapter 29
The rest of Thursday is spent with our mentors. We are debriefed on the city we are each about to claim as our territory. All that is left of our time at the facility is Friday and Saturday, really. Those two days are our time to research our territory, who the other guardians are in the city, how to contact them, make arrangements for living, job interviews as our cover, and make sure our realm of daily activities are in close proximity to the Sondians we are keeping an eye on.
The files left behind by the Dobrian guardians that had our territory before us are a huge benefit to Ezra and I. Well, that is what Ezra said, anyway. All day Friday we scour file after file. Ezra and I are sitting in the rec room. He is sitting on the recliner, and I am on the floor propped against the sofa. We have stacks of records spread into piles by year on the coffee table between us.
I break the silence. “So, the big player is this guy.”
The picture shows a very distinguished slender man. Salt-and-pepper hair, suited, and exiting a very nice sports car.
“It says he is an investor and entrepreneur in the Miami club scene.”
Ezra is studying his own stack. Looks at me. “What? Oh. Yeah. He is a real jack-of-all-trades.”
There is a brief tone of loathing in his voice.
Much of the research is what I would consider private investigative:
8:30 p.m.: S. C. enters main building of executive suite, downtown Miami. Awaiting next move.
9:30 p.m.: S. C. exits main building with young unknown associate.
9:45 p.m.: S. C. leaves unknown associate at entrance of Club Helion.
9:46 p.m.: S. C. heads south along coastline to Club Meridian.
10:00 p.m.: S. C. enters Club Meridian.
3:00 a.m.: S. C. leaves Club Meridian and heads north along coastline to Club Helion.
3:15 a.m.: S. C. enters Club Helion and remains there until 4:00 a.m.
4:05 a.m.: S. C. leaves the club with young, unknown associate and unidentifiable female. Associate takes own car, 2010 Porsche Panamera (espresso).
S. C. takes unidentifiable female in his car, 2010 Porsche Carrera S (black).
Both drive west toward residential area.
4:25 a.m.: S. C. unknown associate, and unidentifiable female enter gated residential community. Not accessible. 24/7 security guard.
4:30 a.m.: surveillance terminated for the night.
My eyes are crossing at this point. “Is this it? Three years of this?” I fiddle with the other files.
Ezra flips from one file to the next, not looking up at me. “Yep.”
This is pointless to me. “Well, what is so intriguing over there because this is not giving me any information.”
“I’m trying to find the name of this young unknown associate that seems to be Sam’s right-hand man. He is a very well-kept secret for some reason.”
I am not getting all of this research. I have a compromise for Ezra. “So how about this? You be the brains, and I will be the brawn.”
Ezra looks up at me. “Excuse me?”
I hold up the files. “This means nothing to me. I mean, I learn more about things, people, places, by being there. Living it. So, you can be the captain, and I will be the soldier.” I smile my biggest cheesy smile.
Ezra smiles back. “Well, my dear, that was my intention the whole time. I’m glad we see eye to eye on that. I was giving you an opportunity, though. I know how much you like to have control of the situation and…”
I roll my eyes. “Point taken. I know I am a little bit of a control freak. But I also know when I am in over my head. And this stuff, words, time frames, means more to you than me right now.”
I pass the files back to Ezra. “It’s all yours, El Capitan. So, tomorrow is our last day here.”
Ezra looks over his file at me. “Yes, that is correct.” He goes back to organizing the files.
I desperately want to ask Ezra to finish the story that he started days ago in the cafeteria about his past.
“So. You never quite finished your story about your years as a trainee and guardian.”
Ezra stops organizing and looks up again. “Yes. You are correct.”
“And I suppose you aren’t going to tell me the rest?”
Ezra takes off his reading glasses. “Jesca, it would be of no benefit to you now to know my experience as a guardian. I am not you. And you are not me. Our experiences, our beginnings, our purposes are not meant to be mimicked. So I will tell you.”
I am surprised. “You will?”
Ezra puts his hand up to stop my excitement before it can start. “I will tell you as we progress in your experience if the situation you are in at the moment can benefit from my story. I will not cloud your perceptions and decisions with my story.”
He looks at me, anticipating a reply.
“I get it.”
I did get it. I mean, how can I truly experience life and my purpose if I am influenced by Ezra’s. He is looking out for me. I am overwhelmed with emotion all of a sudden. “Ezra. This may seem awkward to say, but thank you for saving me.”
Ezra’s face softens for a moment. Then he quickly looks down at his files again.
I stand and start to leave the room.
“Jes?”
I turn to look back at him. “Yeah.”
Ezra smiles at me. “Thank you for letting me save you.”
I leave the room knowing that I am blessed to have a very strong person watching over me.
Back in my room, I grab my headphones and iPod and head for the trails. I am feeling nostalgic, so I choose the path I ran the first day I was here in the facility. As my run is underway, I can’t help but recall what happened on that first run, running into Nate.
A brief smile crosses my face. I remember how it felt to see Nate in the open cavern next to the pool. All the emotions start to flood back into my mind.
Stop thinking about Nate.
Tomorrow we leave for our territory. Nate and I will not be an issue anymore. I look up for a split second and see a hooded figure in front of me. I don’t have time to dodge out of its way, and its massive swing catches me on the shoulder.
I yell out, “Hey!”
The figure quickly stops and pushes its hood off.
Nate.
“Oh, sorry. I was so focused, I didn’t even see you, Jes.”
I see that he is genuinely apologetic and feel bad about lashing out. “No. I should have been more alert, too. I was just thinking and got wrapped up in…my thoughts.”
Nate is breathing heavily with his hands on his hips. His eyes are burning deep into mine. “What thoughts?”
Don’t think about it.
Nate moves toward me. “Too late.”
He cups both of his hands around my face so delicately. I can’t take my eyes off his face, his eyes, his lips. I could have easily slipped away, but didn’t. He brushes a few hairs off of my face that had fallen loose on my run. I feel myself breathing faster, not from running. I put my hands over his.
I think, I have wanted to touch you like this for weeks. I know it is too late. I just want you to know that I don’t hate you. That it is just the opposite. I can’t get enough of you.
He teasingly leans closer. I can feel his breath on my lips.
Nate slides his hand down my neck, onto my shoulder, down to my waist, and pulls me into him. Our energy instantly links. We both simultaneously respond to the breathless feeling. It feels like there is electricity all around us, a warm charge in the air. A continual surge of energy rolling between us, holding us together.
Nate whispers, “Just right now, Jes. Just let us be for right now.”
My lips respond and graze his so gently; that is all it takes. His lips take mine. The heat radiates from my mouth to my face, neck, chest, and heart. My body feels like it is melting into Nate’s.
My hands go to his chest. Not to push him away, but to accept him.
Our kiss slows. We start to pull apart, but I find myself moving back in to touch his lips again.
Just once more.
I pull away slowly. Still tempted to revisit those lips again, but settling for his warm lips against my forehead. I feel his lips form a smile on my right temple as he begins to trace his lips along my face, returning closer to my lips again. I put my fingers to his mouth just as his lips moved to mine.
We need to stop, Nate.
Nate’s arms pull me tighter. I know. Damn, I know.
My arms wrap around his neck, and we both pull each other into an embrace, burying our faces into each other’s shoulders.
We both slowly pull apart, thinking how unexplainable it would be if one of the others came up on us. Nate moves his hands up my back slowly to my arms. His breath pauses at my neck. My hands move to his forearms. I shift my face purposefully to graze his cheek. Our hands find each other’s, not wanting to let go. Nate pulls my hands into his chest and shifts his gaze so that we are looking at each other.
I whisper, “We better get back.”
Nate is still focused on me. “Yeah, we should get back.” Nate doesn’t budge.
“I’m going to, uh, finish my run.”
Nate smiles and breaks our gaze. “I’m going to take a shower.”
Our hands are still linked and are slow to unravel, lingering for as long as possible. I put my headphones back on and move past Nate, putting the necessary separation between us.
I feel Nate leave. Not just physically. I mentally feel a void. The void is so strong it stops me in my tracks.
The link. It’s gone. Can that happen?
For weeks now I have felt a constant link with him. But now, I don’t sense the link. I feel empty inside where it was once full. I am pacing in a circle. How can that be possible. Ezra didn’t say anything about this.
What did you do, Nate?
I yell for him. “Nate!”
The moment I say his name, I already know. It is his way of putting a permanent separation between us. He is trying to make this as easy as possible for me.
I walk to where the cavern opens up, and I shift to turn back, but stop myself.
He broke our bond. It had to be done. It is the only way for him to focus. For me to focus on my purpose. We can’t spend any more time thinking about what happened between us here. We can’t be linked. I guess I think telling myself will make me feel better or stronger.
I start running again, pumping hard now. I am kicking myself for not being careful of what I wished for.
Chapter 30
Saturday is packing day. There isn’t much for us individually to do since we packed light when we got here. We have to do some shut-down protocol in the facility. It would be weeks before the facility would be in use again.
Angela is on tech duty with Siobhan to properly shut down the systems to hibernation and heighten the level of security to automatic termination if breeched by infiltrators. Jake and Nick are cleaning the pool and locking up the gym equipment. Luke and Nate are on cafeteria duty and shutdown. Ezra and I are on trail cleanup, evaluation of trail maintenance, communication of maintenance, and construction of the existing and future trails. It is kind of cool to know that we are creating trails that future trainees will be running and hiking on. In my opinion, we have the most hands-on and creative duty of all of the facility shutdown.
Mapping and recommendations are the most tedious, but so interesting. It sparks a memory. “You know, Ezra, this mapping stuff reminds me of your ant farm back in Georgia.”
Ezra is taken aback by this. “You think so?”
“Yeah. But you already knew that, right?”
I can see Ezra’s smile from the corner of my eye.
“Touché, Jesca.”
We finish shutdown around 5:30 p.m.
I am curious. “So, if the kitchen is shut down, what is our plan for dinner?” I can’t help it. I have a huge appetite at times.
Ezra says, “Come with me. We are meeting in the rec room.”
Ezra opens the door to the rec room. It is dark. This makes me a little confused and a lot apprehensive. All of a sudden, the lights come on.
“Surprise! Happy birthday, Jes!”
Everyone is in the room, including the staff and chefs.
My breath gets caught in my throat where a lump instantly forms. I feel tears forming as well. I look from face to face. I’m trembling. “Thank you, guys.”
Angela rushes up to me and gives me the biggest hug ever and discreetly tucks a tissue into my palm. “We love you, Jes.”
Nick walks over and puts his arm around me. “Yeah, chica, we love you. How old are you? Like thirty?”
I elbow Nick. “Nineteen, dork.”
One at a time, everyone comes over to give me a hug. When it is Nate’s turn, we both look at each other. I test the waters by trying to read him. Nothing. The link really is gone. I drop my eyes.
“Happy birthday, Jes.”
He moves in first. In the brief embrace, Nate whispers into my hair, “I will miss you.”
I whisper back, “Me too.”
Ezra breaks the moment with his announcement. “Jesca, we couldn’t let your birthday pass without a celebration.”
Nate falls back with the others in the small crowd. Nick turns on some music. “Aw, yeah baby!”
Apparently, the chefs had prepared this early prior to shutdown. Luke tells us that Fenton had started the cake last night after dinner and worked all night on preparations. The buffet looks like a feast that would test every single taste bud on my tongue.
I walk over to Fenton before indulging in the feast. “Thank you, Fenton. It is truly amazing.”
Chef Fenton bows before me. “You’re welcome, Ms. Jesca. Enjoy your day.”
Ezra is holding the line for me. I walk over.
“How did you remember? I even forgot. I guess being so focused on training and all, I lost track of time down here.”
Ezra looks down. “Jes, you mean so much…so much to us. We have become a family in a way. Not just a team. These past four weeks have created bonds, friendships, love, that will be with you forever, no matter what may happen.”
I change my expression to match his, knowing that Ezra is very serious about his words all of a sudden. He looks away, but I can see somethin
g stirring behind those eyes before he looks away.
Nick chimes in behind Ezra, “Jes! Birthday girl! I’m starving!”
Ezra smiles at me. “Yeah! C’mon, birthday girl, move along!”
I smile hesitantly at first. Ezra winks at me. “Happy birthday, Jes.”
With that, I give myself permission to enjoy the feast and celebration for the last night at the facility with my family!
* * *
My eyes open.
Sunday. It’s here. Finally.
Then the anxiety starts.
Sunday. It’s here. Already.
It is bittersweet. I am going to miss so many moments with my new family. So many moments. Especially one moment I can’t tear away from my mind.
Nate and I.
I roll over quickly, hoping it will dislodge the thought from my mind. No such luck. Damn.
I look at the clock. It is 5:30 a.m.
Get in the zone, low emotion, high energy. We leave in three and a half hours.
9 a.m. Ezra and I will be out, in the sunlight, driving to the airport, and getting on a plane to Miami. That is the focus for the next three plus hours.
I am not the only one giving myself the pep talk. When I wheel my bag into the hearth room, everyone is there, focused on our inevitable departures.
No one speaks, just acknowledges each other’s presence. The tension is thick, and everyone has their guard up. This is the one time, if any, that blocking our thoughts is understandable and acceptable.
We have been out of touch for four weeks. Luke told us last night that sometimes the first few days are tough. Day and night confusion, headaches from the sunlight, anxiety, and panic attacks due to sensory overload from the world around us. The mentors have warned us to take everything slowly. They said to ease back into the world.
Luke says, “It’s like you are being born again. You are like a dragonfly in a way.”
Nick scoffs. “A dragonfly. What?”
Luke rolls his eyes. “A metaphoric dragonfly, Nick. Dragonflies start in larval stage, newbies, green peas. They burrow in the ground to develop, grow, change, transform. When they transition, they come up from the earth as a dragonfly.”
Piercing The Fold Page 15