by Anne Herries
Susannah hunted for and chose a book of poetry she liked, taking it back to bed with her. She read for a while, then felt sleepy and blew out her candle. As she turned over to sleep, she was aware of a feeling of disappointment. She was not sure that she cared to be married because she was beautiful and would make a suitable wife. She wanted Harry to be madly in love with her. She wanted him to kiss her, not as he had when he proposed, but hungrily with a passion that overtook them both….
Chapter Seven
Susannah ate rolls and honey and drank chocolate in the private sitting room with Amelia; Mrs Hampton had hers in bed, as was her custom. Amelia seemed a little quiet and she looked tired. Susannah suspected she had not slept as well as she might, but she refrained from asking questions. She was not as impulsive as she had been, and Amelia was entitled to her secrets. If she had news, she would tell Susannah, because they were friends.
‘What do you mean to do this morning?’ Amelia asked, as if making an effort to rouse herself from her reverie.
‘Harry is taking me for a drive around the estate,’ Susannah said. ‘I do not know if he will let me take the reins, though he has promised to teach me.’
‘Yes, you should learn,’ Amelia said and smiled. ‘I learned when I was younger than you. It is a useful skill.’
‘What will you do this morning?’
‘Miss Hazledeane asked me if I liked to walk. We may walk later,’ Amelia said. ‘However, I shall not go down just yet for I have some letters of business to write. I advertised for a com pan ion be fore we left town. I had several answers, but only one appealed to me. I have decided to ask a Miss Emily Barton to come for an inter view when I return to my estate.’
‘Oh…’ Susannah nodded. ‘Yes, you will feel lonely when Mama and I leave you. If—if I should be the mistress here, you will come and stay some times, won’t you?’
‘What do you mean, “if”? You are not thinking of crying off?’
‘Oh, no, of course not. I—I was not certain where we shall live. I believe Harry has other houses…’
‘Yes, I am certain he does.’ Amelia looked at her thoughtfully. ‘Of course I shall come to stay wherever you are, dearest, and I hope that you will stay with me now and then. If you were not mistress here, but somewhere else, it would be just the same.’ She smiled. ‘I know it all seems strange and overpowering at first, my love. You will be surprised at how soon you will become accustomed to living here.’
‘I might have known you would see how I feel,’ Susannah replied and laughed. ‘I still love him, Amelia, of course I do—but this house…all those relatives looking at me as if I might suddenly grow another head! I confess it has made me wonder if I am equal to the position of Lord Pendleton’s wife.’
‘It really was too bad of Lady Elizabeth to invite them all so soon,’ Amelia said and looked amused. ‘I am glad you can laugh, dearest. Last night you looked so crushed. I wanted to comfort you, but I did not wish to interfere, for your mama will say everything necessary I am sure.’
‘Mama is always good to me, but I know she has her heart set on the match,’ Susannah said. ‘She wants to see me settled and it is a good match, Amelia. Mama would not need to worry about paying her bills—I am sure that Pendleton would see her com fort ably settled.’
‘An excellent match,’ Amelia agreed. ‘But your mama wants you to be happy. Do not feel that you are trapped, Susannah. If you really feel unable to go through with it, you may withdraw—now I have said too much!’
‘You could never do that,’ Susannah said and got up to kiss her cheek. ‘I am feeling a little…trapped is not quite the word. I think unworthy might be a better one.’
‘Susannah, dearest,’ Amelia said, ‘Harry is fortunate to get you. I have found you quite the kindest, most thoughtful girl. Believe me, this feeling of being in adequate will pass. You will grow into the position, my love—and you will do it well.’
‘You always under stand. If it were not for you, none of this would have happened for me. I might never have met Harry at all.’
‘I am glad to have been of help to you, but I should feel guilty if you married and were unhappy.’
‘I think I shall be happy married to Harry,’ Susannah said. ‘But only if he loves me. I am not so sure that I shall ever enjoy being Lady Pendleton with all that it means.’
‘I am certain he does love you, and you will grow accustomed to the responsibility in time,’ Amelia said. ‘But you must talk to Harry about this, dearest.’
A knock at the door interrupted them, and a maid came in. She bobbed a curtsy and looked at Susannah.
‘Lord Pendleton asked if you were ready to join him, Miss Hampton.’
‘Yes, I have finished my break fast. You may tell his lordship that I shall be down in five minutes.’ She headed for the bedroom as the maid departed. ‘I must get ready, for I do not wish to keep Lord Pendleton waiting.’
Susannah snatched up the bonnet her maid had set ready for her, and draped a light stole over her arms, then pulled on a pair of leather gloves. She would not need a pelisse, for it was a lovely day.
Harry looked at Susannah as she came down stairs to greet him. She was wearing a carriage gown of green striped with white and trimmed with a white band at the hem. Her stole, boots and gloves were white, her straw bonnet trimmed with green ribbons. She looked beautiful and his heart turned over. He wanted to sweep her into his arms and tell her of his love, but before he could speak he saw his nephew coming towards them.
‘You look beautiful, Susannah,’ Toby told her as she reached the bottom of the stairs. ‘Harry is fortunate to have secured you as his bride. I shall be riding to the village this morning, but this afternoon you must allow me to show you the lake from the other side. It cannot be reached except on foot.’
‘How kind,’ Susannah said and bestowed a warm smile on him. ‘I can see it from my window and I shall enjoy the walk—but this morning I am looking forward to my drive.’ She looked at Harry. ‘May I hope that you will allow me to drive your horses, sir?’
‘I have purchased a suitable pair for that very reason,’ Harry told her and smiled as her face lit up with pleasure. ‘Toby was my agent and he has proved a good judge. They are not mad devils like my blacks, but well-bred creatures that are used to a lady’s hand.’
‘Oh, then I shall be able to manage them more easily than his,’ Susannah said innocently, for get ting that her lessons with Toby were supposed to be a secret. Harry shot a sharp look at his nephew, who was trying to look unaffected, but failing. ‘Shall we go—they will not enjoy being kept waiting, will they?’
‘You under stand your horses better than I imagined,’ Harry said and nodded meaning fully at his nephew. ‘I shall see you later, Toby. Would you be good enough to call on me in the library after nuncheon?’
‘Yes, of course, Harry,’ Toby said, a look of discomfort in his eyes. ‘Enjoy your drive, Susannah.’
Harry followed Susannah as she went outside. She had gone immediately to the horses and was patting them, stroking their noses and admiring them. She turned to him as he came up with her.
‘How lovely they are! It was so kind of you to purchase them for my benefit, sir.’
‘You used to call me Pendleton. I prefer it. Sir makes me feel as if I am old enough to be your father.’
‘Does it? Forgive me, Pendleton,’ she said, her eyes clear and free of guile. ‘I did not mean to offend you, especially after such kindness.’
‘It is little enough,’ Harry said, feeling cross for no reason. Anyone would think she was talking to a kind uncle instead of her fiancé! He gave her his hand, helping her up and taking his seat beside her. ‘Would you like to show me what you can do?’ When she hesitated, he looked at her hard. ‘I know Toby has been giving you lessons—the young idiot. He drives horses I gave him as a birthday gift and they are far too strong for a lady! Now I under stand why they bolted like that! He was not in control of them—you were.’
‘Oh
…’ Susannah looked at him un certainly. ‘Please do not be angry with us, and especially not with Toby. I teased him into giving me lessons, you know. I did very well until the horses bolted and then of course I could not hold them.’
‘I am not cross with you,’ Harry said, though he did not smile in the way she loved.
Susannah looked at him a little un certainly. He seemed serious but perhaps he was not angry. Some of the tight ness eased in her chest. He had bought these horses to please her, so he must be quite fond of her.
She took the reins he held out to her, holding them lightly in one hand and accepting the whip he presented with the other. Harry nodded his approval. Encouraged, she gave the order to walk on. Immediately, she understood the difference, for Toby’s horses had been restive, always impatient to be off. This pair of fine horses behaved perfectly, responding to the slightest flick on the reins.
‘Oh, how lovely,’ Susannah cried after they had been driving for a few minutes. ‘So perfectly matched and such polite creatures. One feels that a society hostess has taught them their manners, for they would not dream of disobeying or doing anything outrageous!’
Harry burst into laughter, causing Susannah to glance at him, a twinkle in her eyes. ‘Yes, exactly,’ Harry agreed. ‘I thought them just right for a lady to drive. I am glad you are pleased with them. One thing I would suggest…’ He hesitated. ‘If I may? If you place your thumb so, it might be a little easier. I find it better like this…’ He placed his hands over hers, positioning them at a slightly different angle.
‘Oh, yes, that is easier,’ Susannah said. ‘I have noticed before that you hold your reins in a different way. It did not occur to me that it might make the control easier, but now I see that it does.’
Harry nodded. ‘It is a personal preference. Most of us have our differences. Gerard is a fine whip and Max is perhaps even better. I think Toby is getting there and in a short time he may achieve his desire to join the Four-in-Hand. He has been put on probation and, if he does nothing to arouse censure, will given full membership quite soon, I think.’
‘I have driven my horses at a walk and a trot,’ Susannah said, glancing at him. ‘When do you think I shall be ready to race them?’
‘Would you wish to?’ Harry studied her face. ‘It is not unknown for a lady to race her team on a private estate—but it is not encouraged. Are you brave enough to face the thought of gossip? And who do you intend to race?’
‘Oh, perhaps Toby,’ Susannah said, then remembered that she was about to become Harry’s wife and ought to behave with the proper decorum. ‘But perhaps I should not think of it. I would not wish to be thought fast.’
‘It would be thought fast if the race took place in public, but some ladies have the courage and the credit to carry it off. Perhaps in a few months you might have sufficient skill to try in private, though I am not sure you would find Toby eager to race you.’
‘Why?’
‘If he let you win, you would be angry with him, but if he beat you, he would be afraid of being thought a bad sport and it might offend his notions of gallantry. I, on the other hand, would have no such scruples. You will have to work hard to beat me.’
Susannah stared at him in wonder. ‘You would race me?’
‘When I consider you have the skill,’ Harry told her with a wicked smile that made her heart race. ‘Now, I think you should give your horses their heads and see what they can do—don’t you?’
‘Oh, thank you,’ Susannah said, her eyes bright with excitement. ‘I shall keep you to your word, I promise you!’
Susannah had never enjoyed a drive more! As they approached the front of the house at the end of some two hours, during which she had learned so much that Toby had not thought to tell her, Susannah knew that she had discovered a pleasure that would last through out her life. Any fear she might have had of handling the horses had fled as Harry put her through her paces, encouraging her to gallop her team for short spaces, showing her how to bring them back to a trot and then a walk. They had spent a long time perfecting a turn, and she had learned how to back her horses up, some thing she would never have dreamed she could do.
‘You are a wonderful teacher,’ Susannah declared as a groom came to take the reins and Harry helped her down from the curricle. He stood for a moment with his hands about her waist, his eyes intent on her face. ‘I did enjoy myself so much!’
‘Then we shall drive out again tomorrow,’ Harry said. He smiled in the way that made her breath catch in her throat. For a moment she thought he would kiss her as she longed to be kissed, but he moved away from her and the moment passed. ‘We must go in now, for Mama will expect us to nuncheon. I know you are engaged to Toby for the afternoon, and I have promised to keep my uncle Booker company on a tour of the estate, so I shall see you this evening, Susannah. Enjoy your walk.’
‘Yes, I am sure I shall.’
Harry was being scrupulously polite, just as he was in the drawing room in London society. Susannah felt a little bewildered. Was this the way they would always live? Behaving politely to each other, considering their guests and talking as friends, but nothing more? Susannah knew it was the way many couples lived, making the best of their marriages of convenience and taking lovers or a mistress in secret. Discretion was all, the public face everything.
It was not what she wanted! Not what she had hoped for when she dreamed of her marriage—but this was reality, not a dream.
She frowned and turned, walking swiftly up to the house. She must have the smell of the horses on her clothes and needed to change before presenting herself for nuncheon. As she was going upstairs, she met Miss Hazledeane coming down.
‘You should hurry or you will be late,’ Miss Hazledeane said as she came down. ‘You would not wish to keep everyone waiting, I dare say—even if you are going to marry Lord Pendleton.’
Something in her tone made Susannah wonder what she had done to upset Miss Hazledeane. However, she passed by without answering—she had no wish to quarrel with her.
Having changed her clothes, Susannah went down to the dining parlour as quickly as she could. Most of the guests were already there, helping them selves to an informal buffet. Miss Hazledeane was standing next to Harry at the serving table, smiling at him as he filled her plate for her. She gave Susannah an odd smirk as she took the plate to the table and sat down. People were sitting wherever they wished rather than in the places allotted in the more formal dinner arrangements. Susannah took a plate and joined the line, choosing some cold lamb, green peas and small new potatoes with a little mint relish.
Harry had taken his place at table, sitting between one of his elderly aunts and his friend Max Coleridge. She watched as he listened attentively to his aunt until she turned to the person at her other hand, and then began speaking to Max. Sitting further down the table, Susannah could not catch more than a few words of what they were saying, but she thought it concerned horses.
‘How do you like Pendleton, Miss Hampton?’
Susannah turned to her right and discovered that the Earl of Ravenshead had taken the seat beside her. He was smiling at her and she immediately felt at ease, for his look was one of approval.
‘I like it very well, sir. Lord Pendleton took me driving this morning, but I do not think we saw the half of it for we kept to good roads so that I could learn to handle my team, and I dare say there are many bridle paths that will be exciting to explore. I am to walk as far as the lake this afternoon.’
‘You will enjoy that, I am certain. The lake is natural, though it has been enlarged and landscaped,’ Gerard told her. ‘Pendleton is a large estate, though not, I believe, Harry’s favourite home. He has a smaller estate he favours when he has time to go there. I believe he spends only a few weeks of the year here.’
‘Yes, I think he mentioned some thing of the kind.’
‘These large houses are very well for a family gathering such as this,’ Gerard told her. ‘I would not care to live here all the time, a
nd I do not think Harry does—but no doubt he will tell you about it.’
‘Yes, perhaps,’ Susannah said. ‘I believe you have a fine estate yourself, sir?’
‘It is not as large as Harry’s,’ Gerard told her. ‘It was mortgaged, but I have managed to pay my father’s debts. However, I am not sure whether it will suit me to live there.’
‘You would not sell your family home?’
‘Perhaps.’ He looked thoughtful and glanced across the table, at Amelia, Susannah thought. ‘I have considered living abroad, but as yet my plans are unformed…’
‘I am sure all your friends would miss you if you did,’ Susannah said and blushed. ‘I am too forward, sir. I should not have voiced an opinion.’
‘I invited it by speaking my thoughts aloud,’ Gerard said. He looked as if he had surprised himself by doing so and proceeded to change the subject. ‘Besides, as Harry’s wife you are entitled to speak to me as a friend. I hope we shall always be friends.’ He smiled at her. ‘Now, tell me, Miss Hampton, how are your driving lessons proceeding?’
Susannah told him enthusiastically. She wondered why he had confided as much as he had in her—was she supposed to pass the information on to Amelia? She did not think that she would do so, for he must tell Amelia himself if he wished her to know.
After nuncheon the party dispersed. Many of the older guests had wandered out to the gardens, where chairs had been set under the trees so that they could sit in the shade and enjoy the sunshine. Susannah fetched her bonnet, stole and parasol, meeting Toby in the hall, as arranged. He smiled at her and offered his arm.
‘I saw you talking to the Earl of Ravenshead at nuncheon,’ Toby said. ‘He is one of the members of the Four-in-Hand who will either approve or disapprove my membership. I rather wanted a word with him myself. He has proved elusive so far, but I shall see if I can corner him after dinner.’