Fallen Angels (Dystopian Child Prodigy SciFi) (The Unmaker Series Book 2)
Page 55
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[Ed 1]Will there be more background on Nathan and his father? It is surprising that these inelegant thugs run such a sophisticated operation….unless they are doing it for someone else?
Yes, in the next book there will be a messy situation in which the children escape their holding areas and both Alex and Maria die in the ensuing chaos. The kids will be able to see more and more of the facility as they look for an exit, and answers will be given. At this point in time, I’m a quarter of the book in and any big changes to the Eden storyline in this book (Book 2) could bring me a whole new set of problems.
[Ed 2]How is the Whisperer back to normal? Last we saw him, he was losing his grip on insanity. You may need to resolve this.
Resolved in a brief sentence at the end of the paragraph. In truth, he isn’t back to normal, just acting on his experience and instinct. I’ll get to this in the next book, where I’m already developing the prison war further.
[Ed 3]This transformation of Webster seems quick. It might be appropriate to give him some weakness earlier on in the book so that his downfall doesn’t seem so out of the realm of the posible. This is the first regret he has actually shown.
He’s acting on desperation more than actual regret.