“You could roam the gardens with me and go a little nuts,” she growls, making me giggle.
“You don’t have to stay at home, you know.”
“No, yeah, I know, but it’s stupid, getting a job now when I know I’ll just want to be home after Ben is born. Bear and I want our children to grow up with both parents present, so I have to accept that I won’t ever be a career woman. It’s just a little boring though since Bear started going into the city to work at the agency and Rain has started that bridge club. Jesus, I hate bridge.”
Another laugh, this one for Mama Rain, who’s found her passion in the form of fleecing little old women of their money, playing bridge of all things.
She’s the reigning champ at the moment, and she’s made enough cents to buy an ice cream cone.
But it keeps her busy, and for that, Alric is eternally grateful since he’s decided to manage Bear’s agency as a hobby—drives Bear nuts, of course, but hey…
“So, you’re still coming to the party?” Danny asks for the millionth time.
I roll my eyes because I’ve RSVP’d for a month straight, daily, and she still asks.
“Yes! I will be there. For the hundredth time, Danny Wylder, I will be at your party, and I’ll bring a gift. Geez,” I utter.
“Sorry, sorry, it’s just that I know that you know that he’ll be there, and I get that you may not want to come because of him, but it would hurt me if you didn’t and—”
“Breathe! And calm down, okay? I know Wolf will be at the party, seeing as it’s his welcome home party and all,” I laugh, grunting when she sucks in a deep breath. “It did not escape me the first time I read the invitation, and it hasn’t in the last month whenever you call and remind me.”
“Sorry. I know, but I don’t want to surprise you with the big ass, and he’s…”
“Going to be present at his welcome home bash. I know that, Danny. And I will be there to welcome the great Wylder son back into the fold, okay? It’s all good.”
Which is not true, but it’s my last step in the program that Dr. Morris set out before agreeing to let me go without another referral. I know I am healthy and doing fine. I have the odd setback sometimes when something triggers a memory, but I’m rock solid on the mental front, and I can deal with it all.
I have spent months working through my stuff, and I don’t just cope, I kick ass. So, yeah, I will see Wolf, but according to the good doctor, it will be my last step.
If I can see him and not feel panic, then I know I will be okay. I think. I really have no idea other than to believe that I’m fine and that I got over him.
Which is not quite true, if I count the dreams…
“Okay, okay, this is great! And bring that guy. He was cute,” she trills.
Cute? Jackson Robechaux is not cute. He’s freaking phenomenal-looking, and we all know it! I met him through Lindi, my friend, and after she set us up and I got through a freak-out in the restaurant, I totally got a fuzzy feeling for the guy.
He didn’t once look embarrassed that I was breathing like a lung cancer patient when I forced myself to walk in there, and when the waiter tried to call 911, he told him to screw off and chill out.
By the time our first course arrived—ordered by Jack because I wasn’t capable of much else but trying to stay conscious—I knew I would love him.
He’s got a few bars down on Bourbon and a restaurant. Lindi set us up when she found out I was relocating, and it’s been four weeks of dating thus far, when he can get out to Texas.
I really do look forward to dating him full-time once I’m settled, starting with Wolf’s party, and no, no, don’t get all weird on me, okay? I’m not taking Jack because I’m hell bent on showing Wolf that I have moved on.
I have moved on, and I should be adult enough to show Jack off.
If the thought of sex with him is making me sweat a bit, well, I tell myself it’s because the man is hotter than an egg on a Texan sidewalk and I am just nervous because it’s only my second go-round at this whole love thing.
That’s all.
“Bye, Danny.”
I hang up with a chuckle and swing my feet off the desk, attacking the cake with a love of all things chocolate.
The phone rings again, and I answer around a mouthful of half-chewed dough, choking when I swallow the lump whole.
“‘Lo?”
Silence continues for a second or two, and I frown before I hear a throat clear and then…
“Lori?”
That voice stops everything for me, and when my heart starts racing, this time I don’t have to go all nuts with breathing techniques, because it’s not an attack. It’s this breathless cessation of all thought as his soft, dark drawl slides over me like a sinful caress.
“Wolf.”
It’s one word, and I am thankful that I sound firm when I greet the man I’ve been trying to forget for months. Six months. I’ve been without him for six months, and while I’ve progressed, I can’t lie and say I haven’t thought about Wolf or wondered…
“It’s good to hear your voice, Lori.”
Shit. Don’t go all hot and gooey.
“Cut the crap, Wylder. What’s up?”
He clears his throat at my stern no-nonsense reply, and I feel marginally better about how things may turn out in this conversation. To say I am floored and struck dumb at this call is not even…
I am flabbergasted but also a little confused. I haven’t heard anything about Wolf in three months, and after the way he left, without even saying goodbye, I never expected a thing.
I mean, damn, I envisioned going to his party next week and having him avoid me like the plague. Definitely not a phone call out of the blue.
“I, uh, wanted to talk to you, and I thought it would be a good idea to maybe ask you to dinner so we can, uh, yeah, talk.”
This guy sounds nothing like the Wolf I know. His voice is hesitant, and he’s stumbling over words whereas before Wolf would just tell me what he wanted and expect me to comply.
“Dinner?”
“Yeah, I’m in Texas for my last debriefing, and I figured we could get together and talk about a few things?”
I’d say yes in a second at just the thought of seeing him, but thank God, I can’t, because, you know, it’s just better this way. I no longer want to talk to him and rehash things. I’ve worked it all out, slowly, with a lot of pain, and I don’t think going over things again will help.
I’ve moved on, truly.
“Uh, sorry, Wolf, but I can’t make it tonight.”
“What? Why not?”
Oh! There he is, I muse, snorting into the receiver. There’s the man who tells a woman what he wants and demands compliance.
“I have a date, and I’m not canceling to sit at a table with you and pretend to talk. You’re not going to say anything I haven’t already heard, and I don’t have anything to say back.”
That’s not completely true. A part of me would really like to tell him off, but I know that wouldn’t be healthy, and you know what, I don’t want to focus on the bad stuff anymore.
“We need to talk, Lori.”
“No, we needed to talk six months ago, Wolf, but you made it clear that wasn’t happening. So, I did what you told me to do and moved on,” I say shortly, flicking my pen in a nervous gesture that sets a staccato beat against my desk.
“I know, and I messed up, but I’d really like to sit down with you and explain. Please. Before we see each other next week,” he says gruffly.
“I can’t. I have a date tonight with someone I care too much about to blow off, and the next couple of days are going to be busy with my move. Let’s just do this now and get it over with if you’re so keen.”
Please, no! My coworkers love me, but they already think I’m nuts, and another meltdown won’t make things any better. I may be leaving, but no way do I want to walk away leaving an office full of people referring to me as crazy-eyed Lori who moved down to the swamp.
“I can�
�t do this over the phone.”
“Wolf—”
“It’s not a conversation that I can have over the phone, Lori. I need to see you,” he insists.
Something in his voice has me stilling, and I sigh as I feel my resistance crumble beneath the absolute need to get this done. And yeah, okay, it also bugs me to hear the big strong Wolf shit out of character.
“Fine. Look, come over to my place after ten, and I’ll see you.”
“Thank you, Lori.”
“Don’t thank me yet, Wolf Wylder. I may be letting you talk when you don’t deserve the time of day, but don’t think I won’t talk back,” I warn.
“God forbid,” he chuckles. “I’ll see you after ten.”
Chapter Nine
Lori
Dinner was great, and I enjoyed every single minute of Jack’s company, pushing the coming meeting with Wolf to the back of my mind as I sat and listened to Jack regale me with anecdotes and the cutest stories from his childhood.
I spent half the night looking at him, all that deliciously thick brown hair and the smoky grey eyes and wondered why I couldn’t see myself in bed with him.
Jack is more than good-looking. He’s got this sophisticated vibe that makes my toes curl, and he’s got just enough bad boy in him to guarantee that anything we do in the bedroom would be well worth my while.
I just can’t seem to get into the groove though, and for that, I blame Wolf one hundred and twenty percent. I’ve kissed Jack. Duh! We’ve been dating for a month now, and while I don’t see him on a daily or even sometimes weekly basis, we know each other pretty well.
It would be terrible if I’d started dating him without trying at the very least, and try I have. He kissed me after our third date, and it was…nice. It made me tingle a little, and he’s skilled enough that by the time our lip-lock was done, I was that much closer to imagining us together in a non-platonic way.
Now…nothing! I look at him as he steers the rental car onto my street and try desperately to recapture the sizzle I was starting to feel, when he put his hand on my thigh.
I feel only slightly uncomfortable and throw him a smile when he squeezes my thigh and stops, putting the car in park.
“Thanks for dinner, babe. I really enjoyed seeing you. Can’t wait for you to move down to me so we can do this more regularly.”
Gosh, he’s nice, and charming, and the way he looks at me is everything a woman should want. All I feel right now is nerves because I know he’s going to kiss me and part of me doesn’t want him to.
It’s ridiculous! I shouldn’t feel as if I’m cheating when Jack leans in and gently caresses my nape, his hand drawing me closer to his mouth. His lips touch mine, soft, slightly damp and warm.
I try, hard, to feel that tingle and kiss him back, desperately, when all I feel is a tightening of my limbs and the tell-tale signs of a freak-out approaching.
This hasn’t happened in months, and it’s just bad enough that I have to keep screaming at myself to chill before I scare off a man I really, really don’t want to drive away.
His tongue flicks out to stroke my bottom lip, and I open my mouth to let him in, sighing in relief when the stiffness disappears, and I let myself melt, sucking him in deeper to share the taste of the wine he drank at dinner.
Soon enough I feel something, and it’s only when I need to breathe that I pull away and smile softly at him, taking in every detail of his face, so different from Wolf’s it’s almost a comfort.
“You gonna invite me in for coffee?”
The husky rasp isn’t a demand, but I sense his need and see it when he shifts, the fabric of his slacks pulling tight over his erection. I know Jack wants me, have known it since our third date when he kissed me and couldn’t hide the reaction it elicited.
And I do want him! I want to drown in him and use all his goodness to replace the shadows, the shadowy specter of Wolf. Not tonight though, I think as I caress Jack’s cheek and sigh.
“I can’t tonight. I’m seeing a friend who just got back into town. It was a last-minute call that I couldn’t avoid.”
I don’t mention specifics because I don’t want to explain that my friend is a man I used to love with every fiber of my being. Jack knows most of my troubles, even talked to me at length about how well I’ve been doing in the last two months, but I never told him about Wolf.
To him, Wolf is just the guy who saved me, not the man I fell in love with and had an affair with.
“That’s cool, then. I can wait a week to see my girl and have her to myself.” He grins.
I smile back and peck his lips again before he comes around and opens my door, helping me out.
“I can’t wait to have you close for good.”
“Me either.”
He walks me to my door and leaves with a whistle that has me smiling softly, the expression falling away when I lock the front door and turn, only to scream my head off.
“Oh my God, are you nuts?! Jesus,” I gasp, clutching at my chest when Wolf melts out of the shadows and meets me in the living room.
He looks dark, formidable, and the air around us crackles when he flits his eyes over me, taking in my little black dress and the way my heels make my legs look miles long.
I dressed carefully for tonight’s date, and I want him to see and know that this means something to me. It’s like armor, I think, falling onto the couch with a huff and another wheeze of breath.
I’d freak out, I really would, but Wolf distracts me when he stalks over, pulls me from the seat, and kisses me hard. The contact is not easy, more a mashing of the lips that leads to his tongue plunging home when I gasp and fight for air.
He kisses me with everything he’s got, his body pressed to mine in all the wrong places. I try to struggle and push him away, my mind screaming at me to get away before, before…
Moaning, I push closer, almost climbing him when the tingle I’ve been chasing bursts into an all-body shiver of want so strong I feel my legs spread when he palms my ass and hoists me into him.
Desire rages through me in a blast wave that leaves me moaning into him, pushing so close I feel him between my legs, his shaft hitting me right where I need him.
I should fight, but God, the pleasure when he rotates my hips and grinds into me is so fierce I can’t think.
“That’s it, baby. Use me,” he growls into my mouth when I start riding his length, so wet I feel my heat seep into his pants.
Pull away, stop, and don’t feel. But for the first time in months, I do feel something other than fear, and it’s so good I can’t bring myself to stop. I want Wolf so badly it’s a fire inside me.
Giving in feels wrong and right and oh so wicked when he lowers me to the sofa and shoves my dress away, ripping my panties with a snarl.
His mouth descends without hesitation, and I scream my pleasure when he sucks my clit in on a snarl. Wet sounds fill the room, from me, from the ferocious way he kisses me and makes love to every fold.
I feel him snarl into my flesh, his tongue trailing down, stiffening to spear into me. So hard, so right, I think, writhing, pulling his hair to bring his face closer.
I’m wanton and out of control as he runs his tongue through my slit, piercing between my lips to flick between my opening and the hardened bud of my clitoris.
He doesn’t tease as he always did before, his rough mouth fierce and insistent as he sucks and licks me to an orgasm that leaves me stiffening, bending, riding his mouth with a scream of the most intense pleasure I’ve ever felt.
When it’s done and I am left panting for air, he uses his mouth to lick softly, French kissing my sex gently to avoid my sensitive center. I’m floating while he savors me and finally lays his head on my mound, just holding me as I come down from the heights of a passion that’s left me falling.
“That’s a kiss, baby, the kiss of a man to his woman.”
The words hit me like an ice bath, and I rear up and scramble away, shoving at my dress as suspicion fills me. I’
m still throbbing between my legs, and I have to grind my teeth when he pushes up, his erection tenting his pants and taunting my pulsing center.
God, I want him inside me. Filling my empty places and touching me so deep it hurts with pleasure.
But his words…
“What?”
Wolf’s dark smile meets my eyes, and I stiffen, my temper rising.
“That’s a real kiss. The next time you let that ass kiss you, remember this and ask yourself if you want his pansy-ass touching you, if it measures up to what I can give you.”
“You pig! You absolute—”
“Animal?” he laughs, licking his lips with a lazy look that leaves me blushing and wondering if he still loves the way I taste.
“Wolf, you have no right to come in here and—”
“No, I don’t, but when has that ever stopped me, Lori?”
Never. The answer is that nothing has ever stopped Wolf Wylder from taking what he wants. I could sit here and argue, throw insults at him and hate us both for what I just did, but I’d get nowhere, and I see that more strongly when he leans back against the armrest and eyes me up and down, his eyes fixing on the swollen state of my lips.
“Why are you here?”
He shrugs and flicks a look at my sex, where I’ve shoved my dress down to hide the moisture coating my thighs.
“I’ve had a lot of time to think, and I want to try again—”
“No!”
The answer is a burst of breathless denial, not helped when I shift at the masterful way he eyes me. Wolf grins at my movement, the clenching of thighs slick with the proof of his power over me, and sighs.
“I made a mistake, walking away from you six months ago, and I know it. What we had together was something that deserved more than my usual stubborn refusal to bend.”
“And?” I snarl, ignoring the needs of my body and pushing away the guilt of my actions.
“And what? I made a mistake, and I know it. You’re moving down to my neck of the woods, and now that I’m going into business with Bear, we have time. We can—”
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