by K. A Knight
“Some of the rumours are true,” I start, pulling his gaze back to mine. “They have grass, they have safety—medicine. It’s not like the Wastes. In Paradise, it’s like the world never ended, like nothing ever changed. They have structures, government, an army, women, and children. They also have no sense of the real danger out here, they’re…unprepared,” I finish, looking at Evan. Erik follows my gaze and his eyes widen with understanding.
Evan ducks his head. “It’s true. We know hardships, probably not the same ones you had out here, but life wasn’t easy…Paradise isn’t perfect. I learned that the hard way,” he mutters, and I remember his story about the woman he lost.
Archel drops down in the circle, leaning back and watching the stars. “Full of dead men,” he offers. I look at him in confusion, but he doesn’t meet my gaze. “Monsters just the same, but they cover it up better. Out here, what you see is usually what you get with people. There, they are all liars, covering their evil and desires with a pleasant smile.”
We all stare, but he doesn’t elaborate further, and I catch Evan giving him a strange, considering look. “It’s also run by my father,” I add, my voice calm.
Everyone turns to look at me, as Erik blinked in astonishment. “Your father? I thought he was dead,” he growls.
“So did I. Seems he escaped Ivar’s wrath and hid down there, made a new life,” I mutter bitterly.
“He’s a fucking idiot,” Dray snarls, his voice cutting through my nasty thoughts.
I shrug, not wanting to admit how much it still hurts that he didn’t love me enough to look for me.
“He’s an idiot if he didn’t care enough to risk everything, to never stop looking, to burn the whole world to find you. You don’t need him. Look at me, soulmate.” He turns me so I’m facing him, his icy blue eyes staring deeply into mine. “I mean it. Family is a choice, the ones we are born into aren’t forever, and just because you share blood doesn’t mean you should love them. I chose Archel rather than my family and now you. Nothing, I mean nothing, would stop me from coming for you. Not a scorch, not a war, not fucking anything. You are too important. You are my everything. If he isn’t willing to risk it all for his daughter, he doesn’t deserve you. The weak don’t survive in this world, you know that, and he’s weak,” he growls, gripping my face to make me look at him.
“Dray,” I whisper.
“No, he might have been your father once, but this world changes everyone, not always for the better. I know what and who I am, Worth, and so do you. Don’t you ever let him make you feel less for doing what you had to in order to survive. I’m so fucking proud of you, so fucking honoured that you chose me time and time again. You’re a warrior, a fucking Champion, and now a queen, and you’re starting to act like it. Let him see that, let him see your scars, your story. Don’t ever feel bad for not loving him, he has to earn that, and he hasn’t yet. Sometimes, soulmate, family become strangers and strangers become family.”
What can I say to that? He’s right after all. He shows me it’s okay to be angry, it’s okay to hate the man who raised me and love a man who did not. Major… sands, I miss him. I could use his presence right about now, but I can’t dwell on all I have lost or I will never surface again. I have lost too much, yet looking into Dray’s eyes, I know I’ve gained just as much.
A family.
We’re fucked up, brutal, blood loving psychopaths, but we are a family…scars and all.
Ain’t No Party Like a Scav Party
“We’ll reach the bunker in under two hours tomorrow if I’m right about where we are,” I explain. After we had finished eating, I’d gathered Archel, Bern, Henry, Dray, Erik, and Evan to discuss our plans.
Archel looks around with a smirk. “Wait, does this make me a general?” he taunts.
“I don’t know, assassin, do you want to be one?” I counter, genuinely curious. It seems like the only person he cares about is Dray and this mystery woman. If something more exciting came up, I don’t doubt he would leave, since he’s only here because of the upcoming deaths he gets to wield.
He shrugs, grinning at me. “Such a sweet offer, how could I refuse? I’ll be your general, Worth, until I’m dead or I get bored.”
Well, fuck, I guess that’s the closest to a confirmation and a ‘thank you’ that I’m going to get.
“You’re right about where we are. I remember this place from patrols,” Evan interjects, ignoring the assassin’s interruption altogether. “Around two hours’ drive,” he confirms.
“Good, I will only take Evan and Dray with me—”
“Ma Queen!” Bern protests, making me blink in surprise.
Henry leans forward. “Please take one of our generals. I know you can look after yourself, better than any man here, but what kind of general would I be if I left you to walk in there unprotected?”
Dray leans closer, whispering in my ear, “Let them prove themselves to you, that’s what they’re craving.”
I nod, looking between their eager faces, and then a smirk crosses mine. “Bern, you come with us as well, let’s show them what Berserkers are about.”
He booms a laugh, slapping Henry on the back. “Tough look, lad.”
Henry smiles, but nods to let me know he approves.
“The rest will stay outside as a show of force without making them think we mean harm. We are not staying. We will be on our way straight to The Ring after, where we will meet with everyone else. No one kills any Paradise guards, we can’t afford a war on both fronts,” I finish with a sigh, weariness flowing through my body.
“Okay, it’s ma watch. Henry, ya rest.” Bern clambers to his feet and nods at me before ambling away.
“I’ll take early morning,” I volunteer, but Henry laughs.
“You are queen now, let us do the watch, you need to save your strength.”
I frown but he continues, “Without you, we are leaderless. We all know you don’t mind getting your hands dirty, but we need you strong. We need you confident, so get some sleep.” He stands then and wanders away.
Archel yawns and stretches.
“Let me guess, going to find a nice shadow to crawl into?” I joke.
He laughs, grinning at me. “Shh, don’t give away all my secrets.”
He disappears then, like he was never here to begin with. I shake my head, not knowing how he does that, but I guess that’s why he’s such a good assassin. I’m more a punch first ask questions later sort of person.
Deciding there is nowhere better to sleep, I slip from Dray’s grasp and curl up near the flames. Dray lays down next to me, pillowing his shoulder under my head, and pulls me back into his arms.
“Sleep well, soulmate, dream of only me and yours,” he whispers, kissing my head gently.
How does he always know?
Something pulls me out of my slumber. I keep my eyes closed and my breathing even as I listen for whatever it was. Dray is warm at my front. Obviously, I flipped over in my sleep, and now he is curled around me with the flames still heating my back. I feel him tense slightly and know he’s awake too. Slowly, so I do not alert whoever it is, I slip my hand up from his stomach where it was resting, and ever so slowly slide one of his blades from his chest holster. I feel him doing the same, pulling a blade from my thigh sheath. I tap his chest three times, then two, then one, and we both spring into action.
Turning, our blades aiming for our new prey, we stop only a hair’s breadth away from a wide-eyed, guilty looking Archel, before his expression transforms into a grin. “Thought I was going to have to jump on you,” he says cheekily, straightening from his crouch. “Get up,” he orders, before striding away.
“I’ll kill him,” Dray mutters, and I snigger as I roll over and climb to my feet, stretching out my back. It can’t be urgent, so I saunter over instead of rushing.
I can just see his silhouette on the edge of the camp with someone else, possibly Erik, standing beside him. I move through the camp as silently as I can and join them, looking
out into the Wastes. I instantly spot what they’re looking at and crouch lower into the sands to sit and observe. We are all silent, watching them.
Lights from cars shine out onto the sand as they speed past where we are. They don’t seem to know we are here, and the flames from the fire are low, so unless they are specifically looking for us, they won’t notice. Patrols? I wonder, watching them. They appear to be sweeping the area and are familiar with where they’re going. This isn’t the first time they’ve been out here.
“Patrols,” I offer.
“Looks like. From your Paradise?” Archel guesses.
I nod. “Probably. They are the only people around here with trucks like that.”
When the lights start to fade into the distance, I stand. “Keep an eye out, if they get too close, we’ll move,” I order. “I don’t want to look like we’re running, and I’m not killing a patrol, that wouldn’t go over well.”
“Understood,” Erik rumbles, speaking for the first time.
I stand and nod at Archel before heading back to camp with Dray on my heels. Now that I’m awake, I’ll head over to check in with other watchers. I find Bern over on the other side of our camp, behind the toilet building. He’s leaning back against the wall, sharpening a sword in his lap as he looks out into the Waste. I quieten my steps, sinking slightly into the sand.
“I know ya there, Ma Queen,” he calls and I grin.
Sliding down the building next to him, I see Dray talking to Henry a bit farther out, so I relax and let the peacefulness of the night wash over me. “Any problems?”
“Nah, just some scrapping Berserkers and Seekers. I sorted it,” he rumbles, his gaze flickering down to his blade and then back to the sands around us.
I nod. I expected some infighting, especially since we added Seekers to an already volatile mix of people, so it doesn’t surprise me.
“You’re an odd one, ya know that?” he says, and I flick him a glance to see him smiling at me.
“How so?”
“Ye haven’t asked me story, or anything, yet ye trust me to be ye general. Plus, I ain’t ever seen a woman fight like you.” He shrugs.
“Did you want me to ask you your story?”
He shrugs again and I sigh.
“I don’t ask because I have enough of my own skeletons and nightmares without adding others, and to have survived this long, you must have a boatload of both. I trusted you because you didn’t lie to me, you helped me bury those women, you were gentle and respectful, and you were disgusted by the fact they had been hurt and killed. I don’t judge someone by their past, I judge them by their actions now, and yours showed me everything I needed to know,” I tell him, looking down at the sands.
“Good. But in case ye wanted to know, I was born Bernie Jennifer Waltx, I lived ma whole life up north. I was nineteen when the scorch struck, lived in a tiny village. We survived well for a while, off grid, until the food ran out. Then we simply started scavenging, hunting, to survive. My mother passed away peacefully, my father has been gone since I was a babe, and I had no siblings. I got tired of being alone, so I started to explore. I ran into a Berserker. He was a mean motherfucker, but he could fight. He taught me everything I know, how to hold a blade, how to wield one, and I helped him hunt down the rapist who’d killed his wife. Afterwards, we went back to the castle and the rest…is history.” He shrugs, recollecting it all like you would read a storybook.
“Then ye came alone, Ma Queen, so fierce. You reminded me of him, a true warrior. Ivar was a bastard, and I hated what he turned us into, but it was all I knew. I have to live with tha regret every day, knowing that I dinnie do anything to protect the people he hurt, but I will make up for that now. I will balance my sins and earn my place at those pearly gates, even if it takes the rest of my life. You trust me…well, I’ll trust you. I’m putting my soul in ye hands, Ma Queen. Use me, make me a better man…us better men, then Ivar ever did. That’s the weight on your shoulders and I know you can do it.”
I stare at the side of his face as he continues to sharpen the edge of his sword. “What makes you so certain?” He looks up from his blade now, meeting my gaze, pride shining in his eyes.
“You might not have known me, but I knew you. Saw you fight before, saw you win. No matter what odds you faced, you always won, you never stopped. The kindness you showed those girls, those slaves, tells me everything I need to know as well,” he explains.
“Yeah, well, we’re facing much worse odds now. Honestly, I might not make it back from the Cities,” I admit.
“Then you die trying to save the ones you love. There are much worse ways to die.” He grins and I laugh. He’s crazy just like us, must be a Berserker thing. “You’ll come back, Ma Queen, you have too many people depending on you not te. Plus, ye a stubborn bitch, ye wouldn’t give them the satisfaction of dying.”
“Very fucking true,” I reply, laughing and settling back against the wall as I watch Dray head our way.
“I’m going to sort some Seekers out. Seems they need a reminder of who’s in charge.” He grins, excited at the prospect.
“Don’t kill them all, we need some alive to fight with us.”
He winks and slips away to deal with his people, and I lean my head back against the wall, rolling it to the side to look at Bern. “Mind if I spend the watch with you? There’s no way I’m going back to sleep now.”
“Don’t want to watch the bloodbath?” he jokes.
Looking out at the landscape of sand before us, I grimace. “No, sometimes you just need a little peace.”
“Then find your peace, Ma Queen. I’ll find it with ye.”
The sun rises over the sands, instantly heating the world and making us all sweat. I climb to my feet and stretch. After spending the last couple of hours with Bern, my body feels stiff. I nod at him and slip back into camp to see everyone still sleeping. Archel was right…they do need their rest, and with the sun’s rays only just stretching across the sky, I can let them sleep for a little bit longer. Unable to sit still, though, I head over to Evan and nudge his shoulder with my boot. He has his hand stretched out in front of him, like he’s seeking someone even in his sleep, and his face is scrunched up as if he’s in pain.
I nudge him again and he springs awake, his eyes wide and confused, his hair sticking up on one side and his face coated in sand. I smirk at him. “Come on, sleeping beauty, time for your lesson.”
I wander a few steps away then, letting him wake up as I eye a flat, empty space just beyond the bikes to show him some moves to help protect himself. My life would be easier if I wasn’t worried about him dying all the time…that’s what I’m telling myself anyway. Not that I care what happens to him…at all. Even my own mind calls me a liar on that one. Somehow, that grumpy bastard has become my friend.
“It’s fucking early,” he grumbles behind me.
“Sorry, princess, want me to let you get some more beauty sleep? Maybe just watch as you fumble with that dagger of yours and get yourself killed?” I taunt, turning to him and crossing my arms.
“Fuck you, Worth,” he mutters, before sighing and sitting up. He strips off his jacket and throws it to the side as he glares up at me. “Fine, what do I do?”
I lead him past the bikes to the flat area before taking off my jacket too, and leaving my sword sheathed within it, I hold my arms out to the side. “Stab me.”
He recoils a bit in shock. “What?”
“Stab me,” I repeat, rolling my eyes. “Fuck, you’re slow.”
He narrows his eyes in anger and pulls out his dagger, but hesitates again.
“What’s wrong, princess? Scared of breaking a nail?” I gibe.
He growls low and hard before jumping to his feet and slashing at me. I dodge him easily and smack the side of his head. “Too slow, again.”
He lunges at me again. “You’re transmitting your moves before you even make them, which will get you killed, and you’re too slow. Stop worrying about hurting people. When it co
mes to a fight, either you fight with everything you got or you die. Your opponent won’t care if they hurt you, so don’t worry about hurting them,” I instruct in a firm tone, smacking his hand this time when he tries to upper cut me with the blade. “Again.”
We do this time and time again, dancing across the sand. Sweat pours down his face, his arm weak as he continues to signal his moves. I can see some of the others watching us, gathering, but I ignore them. “No, too fucking slow and you’re still signalling! Your eyes and feet are giving you away,” I growl, and this time when he goes to attack, I grab his blade, spinning to dislodge it from his arm, and have it across his neck from behind in a second.
“You’re dead. Again!” I yell, giving him the blade and moving back.
When he extends his sword, I kick his legs and he yelps as he falls to his ass in the sand. With a wordless scream, he gets to his feet and comes at me in a whirlwind, his anger taking over. I block and dodge each hit. “Good, you’re getting faster. That’s it, stop worrying about hurting me. Don’t think too much, just move,” I order, slipping past as he strikes out randomly.
“That’s it!” I yell, moving around him as he slashes again and again before stopping, and panting as he watches me, his eyes wide and dagger held close. I grin then. “Getting better, but you’re still slow, and I could see you moving a mile away. Let’s go again.”
He groans but nods, which is good. I can teach him everything I know, but he has to want to learn, and he has to want to survive, or what’s the point? We parry for a while until I call stop. By now, people have gathered to watch. I scan the crowd and then beckon Archel.