by Jade Webb
“Liam, I need you,” I manage to say in between desperate pants.
“Almost there, love,” he replies, his own voice unrecognizable and husky, laced with need.
He slowly pulls his fingers out, holding them up to his lips as his tongue darts out, licking them. At the taste of me on his lips, he groans and clenches his eyes shut. “God, you taste so fucking amazing.” He pushes himself off the bed and stalks over to his discarded pants. Shaking them, he lets out a frantic curse as he thrusts a frustrated hand through his hair.
Propping myself up on my elbows, I look over at him, concerned. “What’s wrong?”
“Condom,” he says as he continues digging through his pockets.
“Oh. Do we need one?”
He stops searching and turns to look at me, a wide smile on his face. “Are you looking to make little Liams already, love?”
I roll my eyes. “I’m on birth control. I’ve been on it for years.”
He shoots me a quizzical look.
“I got really bad cramps, so the birth control helps with that. So if you want, I mean, if you’re—”
“I’m clean,” he offers.
“Okay,” I say.
“Okay,” he repeats, dropping his pants on the floor. Coming back on top of me, he kisses me gently.
“You know, I’ve never made love without a condom before,” he says.
I smile at his confession. “Well, I’m happy to be your first,” I say in a mock Scottish brogue, mimicking his words from the other day.
He laughs at my pathetic imitation and kisses me again. His fingers trail down my body, finding their way back to my warm center. With quick, eager strokes, Liam has me panting again in mere seconds. Positioning his cock at my entrance, he locks his eyes on mine. He leans down to kiss me as he slowly pushes himself inside me. I feel my body tense as his head enters me, filling me. He’s going so slowly, and as he pulls his face away from mine, I see the deep lines in his forehead as he fights to keep himself from plunging all the way inside me. When he pushes an inch more of himself inside again, I thrust my hips forward, taking him in fully. I let out a loud gasp as I feel all of his thick, hard length inside me, stretching me in a way I've never felt before.
“Are you okay, love?” he asks, his lips against my ear.
I nod and bite down on my lip. “You just feel really big.”
He chuckles and shifts his hips to pull out a bit. “I promise to make you feel good, Gabby.” He locks his eyes on mine as he hovers over me. "I need you to trust me."
As he looks at me, I wonder if he realizes how much he is asking of me. Does he know how badly I want to trust him? Can he see it in my eyes as easily as I can see his feelings in his? I'm too afraid. Can I give him my body without letting him conquer my heart?
"Gabby?" Liam asks, his brow furrowed in concern when I bring my eyes back to look at him.
"I trust you." The words spill out of my mouth. And when I see the relief wash over Liam's face, I know I can't call them back. He dips his head and kisses me again, rocking his hips so that he thrusts inside of me again.
I force away all my worries and fears and wrap my legs around him. With slow, languid thrusts he fucks me over and over again. The pain fades away and I begin to wholly enjoy the sensation of him inside me, filling every inch of me. Our breathes become one as we both pant and moan in pleasure. His thrusts grow faster and more frantic as he takes my nipple in his mouth, suckling and teasing it. I arch my back to give him better access and he brings his other hand down to massage my clit. His mouth on my breast, his fingers teasing my clit, and his cock pumping into me are too much for me to handle. Within minutes, I feel my muscles tense and I let out a cry as my body quivers from my orgasm and my tight walls clench, contracting around Liam until he, too, succumbs, and with a loud groan, empties himself inside of me.
For several long moments, Liam stays hovered over me, his face nestled against my neck. He brushes soft kisses against me, keeping his still-hard cock inside of me. When he pulls away, he tucks me under his arm and dusts a kiss on the top of my head.
“Gabby, that was bloody amazing," he says between breaths.
I'm too scared to respond. Because I know that if I do, he’ll hear too much in my voice. He will know that I made a terrible, fatal, and irreparable mistake.
I gave him my heart.
47
Gabby
“Hurry up!” I urge as Liam shoots me an annoyed look. He continues to mark the answers on the scrap paper, then pulls out his phone to calculate the score. It’s my sixth practice test so far and the first full-length one I’ve taken.
“Okay, I think I’ve got it. I have no idea how to grade your essay, so I decided to give it both an A++ and a star.” He holds the essay up, proudly displaying the “A++” he had written, along with an oddly shaped star he had tried to draw.
I can’t help but smile, but I’m teeming with anxiety. “Okay, forget the essay. What was the overall score of all the other sections?”
“One hundred seventy.”
My mouth drops open. “One hundred seventy? No way. Let me see that.” I grab my practice test from his lap and pull the pen out of my bun. Adding the scores from the logical reasoning, analytical reasoning, and reading comprehension sections, I then check the answer key a final time.
“Oh my God. I got a one hundred seventy!” I squeal as I jump into Liam’s arms and pepper kisses all over his face.
He laughs and swings me around. “My little genius,” he declares. Bringing me back down, he places a kiss on my forehead. “I’m proud of you.”
I continue to shake my head in awe. “You know, I’m kind of proud of myself, too,” I tell him.
A mischievous smile crosses his face as he drops his hands to rest on my hips. “You know, I think this calls for a bit of celebration.”
“Oh, do you now?”
“Oh, aye. I think you should get a nice little reward for doing so well,” he replies as he walks me backward, his hands still on my hips, toward the bed.
Once I make contact with the bed, I fall back as Liam towers over me. Grabbing the hem of his shirt, he tears it over his head and I let my greedy eyes explore every hard edge of his body. Pushing myself up, I let my hands skim his abs, moving up to his chest, where the dark ink of a tattoo starts.
“You’re so beautiful,” I say as I trace the outlines of his tattoos on his chest.
Liam quirks his brow and watches me in amusement. “Beautiful, eh?”
I smile and nod. “All this ink and your muscles—they make it so when people first see you, you look so tough. But inside, you’re really quite beautiful.”
Liam smiles as he presses a soft kiss to my forehead. “I’m only beautiful for you, love,” he whispers in my ear as he skims his lips down my neck, marking me with his tongue.
When he gets to my collarbone, he places a series of kisses on my skin as his hands pull my shirt over my head, discarding it on the floor beneath us. Cupping my breasts with his hands, he moans approvingly as he deftly reaches behind me and unclasps my bra.
“God, Gabby, everything about you is so perfect,” he murmurs as he dips his head to suck the hard peak of my nipple into the heat of his mouth. “You were made for me, love.”
His words, combined with his touch, completely ignite me, setting my skin aflame. I arch toward him as my fingers fumble at my pants, unbuckling them and kicking them off onto the growing pile of clothes on the floor beneath us. Squirming under his touch, I work on unbuttoning Liam’s jeans. He eagerly complies and with a quick tug, pulls off his boxers to reveal his hard, erect length bobbing against his toned stomach.
With a mischievous glint in his eye, he pulls my panties off and dips his head, disappearing between my thighs, as he eagerly feasts on me, his tongue laving at my center, drinking me in. His hands firmly grip my squirming thighs as he takes his fill, eager and hungry.
My body tenses as I can feel my release approaching. Reading my body, Liam s
lides two fingers inside of me and matches his thrusts with the deft movement of his roving tongue. I come instantly, shouting his name as my walls clench around his fingers, still inside me. With a satisfied smile on his face, Liam rises over me and pulls me toward the edge of the bed before sliding inside my wet entrance, his cock effortlessly gliding into me. The minute he is fully ensheathed, his dark eyes close and my name floats from his lips.
As he opens his eyes to look down at me, he begins to slowly withdraw. I feel my own eyes roll to the back of my head at his tantalizingly slow retreat from my body. Suddenly, he shifts, and with a quick thrust, he’s back inside. He continues to fuck me this way: agonizingly slow withdrawals followed by frantic, quick thrusts, until I’m panting, repeating his name like a prayer as my body prepares for another earth-shattering orgasm. I can see he is just as close; his muscles ripple as he tries to control himself, ensuring that I receive my pleasure first.
“Liam, please,” I whisper, my voice desperate and frantic. “Don’t hold back. Just…just fuck me like you need to.”
My words set off something inside of him. Suddenly, his features change and I see a whole different side of Liam. He drops down on top of me, holding himself up by his palms as he frantically and relentlessly fucks me, over and over. His mouth finds my shoulder and he bites down as he groans with each frenzied thrust. The sound of his husky, masculine groans in my ear send me over the edge and I shout my release as I feel my entire body tremble with pleasure. A second later, Liam groans as he thrusts into me again, his arms trembling at my sides as he comes, everything inside of him shooting inside of me, uniting us. He collapses on top of me, pressing soft kisses on my neck. “Thank you,” he whispers, over and over.
As we both catch our breaths, our hearts hammering against our chests, he rolls away and pulls me toward him, tucking me under his arm.
“Ah, Gabby,” he says, expelling a long breath. “You fucking own me, woman.”
I chuckle and press myself closer to him. I rest my head over his chest, my ear pressed against his racing heart.
“I’m demanding that, for the rest of the tour, you stay in my hotel room. No way am I letting you go. And now that I think about it, every night after that sounds good, too,” Liam declares as he closes his eyes, a content and satisfied smile on his face.
I smile and look up at him, rolling my eyes. “How about we just enjoy tonight?” Settling deeper into the crook of his arm, I add, “Who knows where we’ll be even a week from now?”
As the words leave my mouth, I can feel Liam’s body tense beneath me. He shifts in the bed, pulling his arm from underneath me and propping himself on his elbow to face me. His eyes bore into mine, a deep indent forming as he furrows his brow. “What do you mean, ‘Who knows where we’ll be?'”
I shrug my shoulders, forcing my eyes to escape his penetrating gaze. “Once I get my scores back, I can start applying to schools and hopefully move back East, go to Georgetown or Harvard, or wherever. And you’ll still be working for Daphni. We’ll be going in separate directions."
And because Liam wears every emotion on his face, I can see his confusion as the words spill out of my mouth. And still, I can't stop myself. I want to force my lips closed, tell him it was all a mistake. But I can't. Because I'm terrified, and because when Liam looks at me, I don't see just desire and need in his eyes. I see something more. So when I say the next words, I convince myself it's to protect him, and not because I'm too afraid to let him know I've fallen. "Liam, I'm going to law school and you're a bodyguard. We're too different."
My words have their intended effect and Liam's jaw tenses as his eyes darken. “Right, I’m just a bodyguard,” Liam repeats, the hurt marking his features evident.
I push myself up into a seated position, covering myself with the sheet. "Can't we just enjoy being together now? Why do we have to talk about the future?"
“Why? What’s the point?” Liam asks as he tears out of the bed, reaching for his pants on the floor. “Apparently, we’re going in different directions anyway. This,” he says, pointing at me and then back to himself, “has an expiration date for you.”
“Liam, there’s no such thing as a fairytale happy ending. Why do we have to complicate this?" Even though I can see how my words are imploding everything in front of me, I can’t stop myself from saying them.
“I’m not an idiot, Gabby. I know life isn’t a fairytale. But look me in the eye and tell me that this isn’t something special here.”
“Liam, even if it is, we would destroy each other. We live different lives, Liam.”
Liam’s jaw ticks as he steps away. He looks away and nods slowly. “So, that is really how you see me, then? As just a bodyguard?”
I don't respond. I'm a coward and I tear my eyes away. And that alone says more than every terrible, hurtful word I've already said.
“It is how you see me.” He turns and rakes his fingers through his hair. “How could I ever think that a person like you could care for someone like me?”
“A person like me? What is that supposed to mean?”
“A girl who grew up having everything. Your mansions, your cars, your clothes—they’re just things, Gabby.” Grabbing my hand, he presses it to his chest, where I can feel his heart beating beneath my palm. “Do you feel this? I am real, Gabby. I am here. I love you. I know you feel it.”
I pull my hand back before I can let him feel my palm trembling against him. Before he can realize that I’m purposefully destroying everything.
Because I know I love Liam. But I am a coward, and a liar. So I shake my head. “I can’t love you Liam.”
“You can’t, or you don’t?” he demands.
“I don’t,” I whisper.
Liam looks at me and I can read the stunned hurt and surprise on his face and it rips me apart. But instead of calling back my words, telling him it was all a terrible mistake, I let him storm away, slam the door, and walk out of my life.
48
Gabby
“So, to clarify: your plan is to just loiter around the house until you take your LSATs next week and then…?”
“Then I am going to law school and will be out of your hair, Law. Don’t worry,” I snap back.
“Okay, well considering you are in such a delightful mood, I’m going to say we can have this conversation later.”
I roll my eyes and collapse onto Lawrence’s couch with a box of Isabel’s Fruit Loops. Shoving them into my mouth, I flip through the channels on his TV before finally settling on a Spanish telenovela.
“Auntie Gabby, you don’t look so good.”
The sound of my niece’s voice behind me makes me jump up, spilling the box of Fruit Loops all over the floor. Lawrence’s dog, Julep, happily pounces over to help clean up the mess.
“Oh, Isabel. I didn’t see you,” I say as I clean the cereal off my shirt. “I’m okay, you don’t need to worry.”
She gives me a side-eye that I can only assume she learned from Daphni. “You don’t look okay.”
“Well, it’s complicated, honey.”
“Daddy says you dumped your boyfriend and ran away,” Isabel says matter-of-factly.
“No, Daddy didn’t say that!” Lawrence yells out from the other room.
“Well, Daddy’s wrong,” I shout so Lawrence can hear me. “Men usually are, Isabel.”
With that comment, Lawrence comes back in the room. “Okay, before you make my daughter an antisocial hermit who counts sugar cereal as a food group and has trust issues with men, I’m going to step in.” Lawrence presses a quick kiss to his daughter’s head. “Isabel, why don’t you go up and play in your room?”
As Isabel leaves, Lawrence sits down on the edge of the coffee table to face me.
“Gabby, what is your deal?” he asks, his eyes pinning me.
“What do you mean?” I ask, avoiding his stare.
“Daphni told me about Liam. He sounds like a really nice guy, Gabby. What happened?”
I shrug, doing
my best to look unaffected. “It wasn’t going to work.”
“Why not?”
“He wanted to be in a relationship and I’m going to law school. It wouldn’t work out.”
“Okay, right. And it wouldn’t work because law school is on another planet and the commute would just be too long?" Lawrence asks, obviously annoyed. "Gabby, you don’t even know where you want to go to school yet. Maybe Liam would want to go with you? Or you can try it long distance for a while?”
“It’s not that simple, Law. I mean, come on! Look at Mom and Dad! They were miserable their whole lives!”
“Gabby, you are not Mom and Dad. They made their choices. They chose a miserable life over being honest with themselves." He blows out a frustrated breath. "You are too smart for your own good sometimes, you know that? You overanalyze and overthink everything. Some things you just know with your gut.”
“Lawrence, I love you, but you really shouldn’t be dishing out relationship advice when your ex-fiancé literally tried to run you over with a car.”
“Wow, Gabby. So you’re going for the low blows, now.”
“I’m sorry. But seeing your relationship with Fiona and Daphni’s insane relationship with Drizzle…Don’t you think our DNA has just doomed us to be either completely alone or married and miserable?”
“No, I think that’s absolute bullshit. And what makes it even sadder is that you’re letting your fear prevent you from falling in love with someone who could be really amazing for you.”
I shake my head. “So even after everything you went through with Fiona—the broken ribs, the restraining orders, the custody battles—you still think there’s someone out there waiting for you? You still have a chance to find that?”
Lawrence shrugs his shoulders. “I honestly don’t know, Gabby. But I do know I have Isabel, and that I will love her more than I could love anyone else in this world. And I know that if I ever get lucky and get another shot at love, hell yeah I would take it.”