Oh, shit. He was seriously livid.
Taking a deep breath, she fought to stay calm, knowing her own temper would have been gearing up for an argument in defense of her actions, if it weren’t for the stark worry in his hooded gaze that he hadn’t quite managed to conceal. Instead of making her defensive, it just made her feel like crap for not calling him and at least trying to explain why she’d had to go. She knew she should have, but she’d simply been too wrapped up in her own worries, after dealing with her suicidal patient, to talk to anyone. Much less the man who was playing havoc with her heart.
“You, I’ll deal with later,” he told her, before turning away from her and glaring at his family. Shoving his hands in his pockets, he said, “You two need to get lost.”
“Nice,” Ben murmured, his tone resigned. “Being a dick is just your go-to behavior, isn’t it?”
Alex ground his jaw, but didn’t bother arguing. Brit knew he knew he was being a jerk. At the moment, he was just too angry to care.
She cast the couple an apologetic smile as they walked past, hugging Reese back when her friend threw her arms around her shoulders.
“You didn’t have to be a dick to them,” she murmured, the moment the front door was closed behind them. She locked it, then turned around to face him. “I’m the one you’re mad at. Not them.”
“I’m pissed at everyone right now,” he countered, the gruff words ominously soft. “But that’s not what I want to talk about. What I want is to know . . .” His breathing roughened, his deep voice lashing with anger. “Christ, Brit. I want to know what the fuck you were thinking!”
She swiped her tongue over her lower lip, and tried to keep her voice steady. “I’m sorry I didn’t call you. But I had a lot to . . . deal with.”
He stared back at her, waiting for more, and she knew that as far as explanations went, that one wasn’t going to hold water. But what else could she tell him? Certainly not the truth. That her patient had turned suicidal after her boyfriend left her for another woman, and that she’d been profoundly affected by the woman’s pain. By her tears and the wrenching heartbreak that was ripping her in two.
How could she tell Alex, the man who never wanted to talk about his emotions and what he was feeling, that the only way she’d been able to deal with tonight was by taking a step back and giving herself some time to think? Yes, she should have called him—but she couldn’t. Not then. Hell, she barely knew what to say to him now.
And, to be honest, he didn’t look like a man who wanted to talk at the moment. No, he looked like a man who was ready to put his woman over his knee and spank her ass until it burned with a hot, rosy glow.
But she wasn’t his woman. He’d made that clear last night, when he’d refused to give her an answer about their future. She knew, with every fiber of her being, that there was a strong connection between them. One that was as beautiful as it was unique. One of those once-in-a-lifetime kind of things. But that didn’t mean that anything would ever come of it. Didn’t mean that he would ever be able to accept it. Be happy for it and thankful, instead of looking at it as a curse.
“You had a lot to deal with,” he muttered, shaking his head. “You know, you’re not stupid, Brit, so why the hell are you acting like it? Going out like that without me . . . Fuck, I can’t even begin to understand what you were thinking.”
“Alex, this was a legitimate call.”
“You didn’t know that!” he roared. “When that call first came in, you didn’t know that! Shepherd could have targeted that woman and set the whole thing up. You could have been walking right into one of his sick, twisted fantasies!”
Seeing precisely how terrified he’d been, her frustration and worries simply faded beneath a heavy wave of remorse that made her feel even crappier for doing this to him. “I’m sorry,” she said quietly, walking toward him. “I really am, Alex. I didn’t mean to worry you.”
“You didn’t worry me,” he muttered hoarsely, scrubbing his hands down his face, before shoving all ten fingers back through his hair. The look he gave her was stark, and filled with pain. “You scared the ever-living hell out of me.”
“I didn’t mean to.” She stepped closer, and put her hand on his hard chest. “How can I make it up to you?”
His nostrils flared as he pulled in a slow, deep breath, his strong throat working as he swallowed. “Considering I’m about two seconds away from spanking your little ass raw right now, Doc, I’d be careful what you say.”
She flicked her tongue over her bottom lip. “If it’ll make you forgive me, then do it, Alex. I couldn’t get enough of it last night. And I can’t imagine I’d feel any differently now. So do it. Do whatever will make you feel better.”
His eyes went heavy as his body stilled in a tense, predatory way. “You want to make me feel better?”
Her voice was soft, breathless. “Yes.”
She watched as his pupils dilated, the turbulent black nearly drowning out the pale, angry green. “Anything I want?”
She nodded, wondering what on earth she was getting herself into. Every time she should be smart and take a step back, she found herself rushing headfirst into another carnal sexual encounter with him, each one binding her even deeper under his spell. But, damn it, she wanted this, too. Wanted it too badly to turn away from him, even if she was like the proverbial moth flying closer and closer to the flame.
If she were Icarus, her wings would have melted long ago. And the scary thing was, she just didn’t give a damn.
“What do you want, Alex? Tell me.”
His eyes burned with a hot, possessive glow. “I want you up in my bed, naked, begging me to take you in the ass.”
“All right,” she somehow managed to reply in a steady voice. “Then come with me.” Taking his hand, she pulled him along behind her as she headed up the stairs, her heart pounding with each step. She could feel the heat of his stare burning against her, into her, his hand hot to the touch, as if he were raging with fever, and she shivered in response, knowing they were no doubt going to set the sheets on fire.
Needing to grab something from the guest room, she left him standing by his doorway, and his eyes darkened when she came back to him with a small bottle of baby oil in her hand. He followed her into his room, which was silent and still but for the soft whoosh of the cool air spilling from the air-conditioning vent.
“I’m sorry I scared you,” she murmured, looking up at him when they were both standing at the foot of his bed, where she’d tossed the bottle of baby oil. Unbuttoning the top button on her blouse, she went on. “But I didn’t have a choice. I needed to make sure she was okay.”
His breath left his lungs on a deep exhalation. “I get that you felt you needed to be there, but the way you handled it was wrong, Brit. You should have waited for me. Hell, at the very least you should have called me and talked it over with me.”
Dropping the blouse to the floor, she stepped out of her shoes and reached back to the zipper on her skirt, pulling it down. “When I first got the call, it was right in the middle of when you were scheduled to be in your meeting with the detectives and I didn’t want to interrupt you.”
His dark brows drew together. “And then later?”
“I . . . um, it’s complicated,” she murmured, hoping to distract him as she let the skirt slip down her legs. And it worked for a moment. His searing gaze moved over her body with avid appreciation, taking in her lacy bra and panties. He ran a hand over his mouth roughly, sighed, then lifted his searching gaze to hers.
“What kind of answer is that?”
Her lips twitched as she tried not to smile. “The same kind you usually give me,” she said lightly.
He grunted, the harsh sound thick with frustration, then lifted a hand to the back of his neck. “You sure you want to do this?” he asked, watching her carefully.
“Why wouldn’t I be?” sh
e countered, tilting her head a bit to the side.
His lashes lowered, but not before she caught the flash of something dark and visceral in his eyes. “Because if you get on that bed, I really am going to put every hard, thick inch of my cock up your ass. And then I’m going to fuck it like I own it.”
She sucked in a sharp breath at the low, gritty statement of intent, and her pulse quickened.
Reading her expression, he slowly arched an eyebrow. “You sure you don’t want to run now, Doc?” he murmured, and she could tell by his tone that he expected her to do exactly that.
But I’m no coward. Like hell am I running.
“Does this look like I’m scared?” she asked him, reaching behind her and unclasping her bra. She almost smiled at the look of surprise he tried to conceal, then found herself shuddering with a powerful wave of desire when his surprise bled into raw, primitive hunger. He watched her strip out of her panties like a predator might watch his evening meal, his breaths deepening as his body seemed to expand, all those acres of hard, lean muscle flexing beneath his tight skin.
Without a word, Brit crawled onto the bed, then turned over, bracing herself on her elbows as she slowly bent her knees, opening her legs so that he could see every part of her. She didn’t need to touch herself to know that she was already sopping and swollen between her thighs, her tender folds tingling with anticipation as he visually claimed every inch of her. He turned away, walking over to his dresser, where he laid his wallet down, along with some loose change. Then he leaned over, giving her a great shot of his tight ass as he took off his boots and socks. When he straightened, he pulled his shirt off, dropping it as he turned back to her, his hands slowly undoing his belt and fly as he walked back toward the foot of the bed. Shoving the denim and tight black boxers over his hips, he let them drop as he climbed onto the bed, so freaking gorgeous she was pretty sure she’d been watching him with her mouth hanging open.
She wasn’t quite sure of what to expect from what they were about to do, but she’d have been outright lying if she’d said she wasn’t excited about it. She was curious . . . and yes, a little apprehensive. But mostly she was eager to see just how far Alex could go with her. How deep into the raw, emotionally intense, blisteringly hot connection they shared he could take her.
Chills swept over her heated skin as she watched him fist his cock in a brutal grip, the veins on the back of his hand pressing against his skin as he pumped the engorged shaft a few times, the head already dark and wet. “On your hands and knees,” he said in a low voice as he dragged his hard gaze up the trembling length of her body, lingering on her pussy, breasts, and mouth, before finally locking it tight with hers.
Taking a deep breath, she rolled over and got into position, a violent tremor of remembered pleasure rushing through her when she thought about how he’d cuffed and fucked her from behind the night before. Her throat was still a little hoarse from how hard she’d screamed, her insides tender. But, God, it had been worth it.
And the way he’d held her in his arms throughout the long night, during those quiet hours when he hadn’t been inside her, had been so sweet she’d nearly burst into tears that morning when she’d opened her eyes.
But this wasn’t the time to think about the things that had already happened. It was time to focus on what he was about to do to her now, and as she curled her fingers into the sheets, Brit felt him move up behind her, the press of his hands against her inner thighs forcing her to open her legs wider, her ass presented to him as she went down on her elbows and arched her back.
“That’s fucking perfect,” he scraped out, his big hands squeezing her ass, and then pulling the cheeks apart, opening her right up. “Your cunt’s already dripping, Brit. You have cream sliding down your thighs.”
“I know,” she whispered.
“Are you excited about what’s coming?” he asked in a dark rasp, stroking his thumbs along either side of the sensitive opening buried there between her cheeks. “About what I’m going to do to this tight little hole?”
She shivered, arching her back even deeper. “I am,” she breathed out, moaning low in her throat. “You make me want everything with you, Alex. So just do it. Stop making me wait.”
“Not yet,” he muttered, reaching over to the bedside table and taking something from the drawer. For a moment, she thought he was getting the handcuffs again. But then she heard the sound of a foil wrapper being opened, and realized he was putting on a condom. It made her wonder if he was planning on fucking her pussy after he fucked her ass, but then she forgot all about asking him for an explanation when he notched the broad head of his cock against her vulva. He pushed into her slow and deep, parting her swollen tissues with his thick penetration. “God, Brit.” He barely moved his hips in a brief back and forth motion, but it was enough to make her writhe. “You have the tightest, sweetest little pussy. It’s always so fucking hot and ready.”
Because of him. Because he made her that way.
“What are you doing?” she asked. “I mean, other than the obvious?”
“The baby oil is great, but nothing’s as good as your lube.” He ground against her, giving her every inch, groaning when she tightened her inner muscles, squeezing him inside her. “Fuck, that feels good.”
“Are you wet enough yet?” she gasped, her breaths quickening as she felt him rub the tip of his thumb around her drenched vulva, the tender skin stretched tight around the thick root of his cock. Then he pressed the slick digit against the puckered ring of muscle where she was waiting to take him, briefly pushing it inside, and she all but shouted, “When, Alex?”
“Now,” he muttered, carefully pulling from her sheath. She was still swollen enough inside that he could have hurt her if he wasn’t gentle, and the way he handled her just made her trust him all the more.
“Good . . . that’s good,” she moaned, shocked by how greedy she sounded. How desperate. Her heart raced, pounding hard and fast in her chest, as she heard him pop open the top of the small baby oil bottle, then felt the wet trickle of oil as he drizzled it between her cheeks. A quick glance back showed him rubbing more of the oil onto his already glistening, latex-covered cock, and she bit her lip as she closed her eyes, trying not to think about how freaking big he looked.
“Push out for me,” he said a moment later, pressing his wide cockhead against the sensitive hole. “It’ll make it easier for you.”
Oh, wow. Her eyes were shocked wide, her heart damn near climbing its way into her throat as she felt him start to push inside. “You’re kidding, right?” she wheezed, her chest jerking with a breathless laugh. “The only thing that could make this easier for me is if I was the one doing it to you!”
“Yeah, but that wouldn’t be anywhere near as much fun,” he rumbled, his big hands gripping her ass. He spread her cheeks, and she knew he was watching what he was doing to her as he pushed a little more of his veined shaft into the tiny hole. Voice even rougher than it’d been before, he said, “And anything worth having is worth some hard effort, Doc. Don’t you preach that to your patients?”
“Are you saying you’re worth it?” she asked, as he sank in another thick, steely inch.
He froze at her words, and she couldn’t even hear him breathing. Then he blew out a hard breath, and muttered, “The pleasure’ll be worth it.”
She was panting too hard to even talk now, her pulse roaring in her ears as he dipped two fingers into her empty sex, swirling them around to get them nice and wet, before slicking her juices onto the inches of cock he hadn’t worked inside her yet. It was getting easier, but was still . . . intense, and even a little painful. She started focusing on pushing back as he went forward, determined to make it work, and somewhere in the middle of all the searing, bone-melting sensations, she realized she was nearly taking him all the way to the root now.
Oh, holy hell. It was . . . She grit her teeth, unable to think of how t
o describe it as he started fucking her ass with short, jabbing strokes. Powerful, but controlled, as if he had to leash himself as tightly as possible to keep from losing it. Sweat glistened on her skin as he gripped her hips in a greedy, biting hold, the warm drops slipping into the hollow at her lower back. She was taking him a little easier now, his thrusts getting a bit harder as he read the signals and cues from her body, and she got lost in the onslaught of raw ecstasy and pinching pain, the two sensations so intertwined she could no longer tell one from the other. She was bombarded with maddening pulses of heat and fullness, intense pulling and stretching, her body so lost in the devastating chaos she was making sounds and screaming things she didn’t even understand. All she knew was that she loved it. Fucking loved it. Loved how carnal and intimate it felt, as if he was driving himself into the very heart of her. But that wasn’t even the best part.
No, the best part wasn’t what was happening to her body. It was what was happening to Alex’s. The way she could feel him trembling behind her as she started pushing back against his thrusts, slamming her ass against him. The strong, possessive grip of his big hands on her hips as he started yanking her against him, struggling to go slow as hoarse, guttural curses spilled from his lips in a violent rush. The urgency of his breaths and the pumping, pulsing strokes of his hips as he tried not to lose control and give her too much, too hard, too soon. He was coming undone, and she wanted just to push and shove and force him over that edge, even knowing she would be weathering the storm right along with him. But he suddenly pulled out before she could act on the dangerous impulses, her body left aching and empty as she looked over her shoulder just in time to see him ripping the condom off and tossing it on the floor.
What was he . . . ?
“I couldn’t hold it,” he growled, braced on his knees as he grabbed her and turned her over. Then he jerked her up against him, her legs on either side of his muscular thighs. His arms were like steel bands around her, his body shaking as much as his voice. “Damn it, baby. Are you okay?”
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