by Sylvia Ryan
She was dazed, disoriented. Ben and Arden had changed places, and Arden was now standing in front of her with Ben behind. Large hands grabbed Julia’s hips and jerked her ass up in the air then ran two fingers up her wet center.
Her response to the touch was immediate and intense. “Don’t tease,” she begged.
Julia knew Ben’s need for her was illicit. His throbbing, hard cock couldn’t wait any longer even if his mind wanted to. He filled her welcoming, wet opening to the hilt, and she thought she was going to die from the sheer satisfaction of having him inside her. She was tight around him. The inside of her clung to him, hugged him.
He stilled inside her for a moment, kneading her rear with both hands. Her tiny ass was wholly covered by the spread of his fingers.
Once he regained his composure, Ben’s retreat and penetration of her was long and smooth from tip to hilt. She released a breath when he brushed the pad of his finger against the bud of her anus. He massaged her there, and Julia cried out in reaction. She wanted him there, and he obliged, penetrating her with his finger.
Arden watched what Ben was doing behind Julia and then met her eyes. His erection was just inches from Julia’s head. The nice country-boy veneer had been shed, and he looked at her with pure desire. Julia lifted the top half of her body so only her knees were on the mattress. She pulled Arden closer to her, wrapping her left arm around him.
She embraced him, snuggling her cheek on his abs. She took hold of the base of his cock with her right hand. She licked his soft mushroomed head, spiraling circles from the very tip around and around until the whole head filled her mouth. Arden grabbed her hair as she took him deeper into her mouth. She moaned against his cock and pumped her hand in sync with its deep penetration of her mouth.
Ben continued to lazily enter and retreat. Her muscles clamped onto him without mercy. She could feel Ben close the gap between their bodies. He wrapped an arm around her waist and rested his cheek on her torso. Her skin was abraded under the prickly roughness of his face. He circled her body with his arm and lowered his hand until he found her clit. He slid his finger against it and moved over it in a blessedly consistent rhythm. He pressed and circled, pressed and circled, coaxing her closer and closer to orgasm, his cock entering and retreating harder and faster.
Ben’s hand working her swollen bud was the final piece of the puzzle. Julia felt her climax begin to converge, gathering in intensity, trying to steal her total attention as it approached. She worked Arden faster, her mouth sucking and licking with ferocity while she moaned her own exquisite pleasure. She pumped her hand fiercely in unison with her mouth, as Arden tangled his hand in her hair. She was relentless, hungry for his cum in her mouth.
Arden’s head rolled backward. He seemed unable to rein his pleasure in. She hungrily took him to the back of her throat. Her moans vibrated against him. Her hand cupped his balls. No longer able to stop himself, he released hot jets into her mouth. The warm saltiness of him hit the back of her throat as she swallowed against his cock.
“Aahh, Julia. Yes, baby!” Arden shouted.
A heartbeat after Arden released into her mouth, Julia’s pleasure overtook her. Her muscles froze. Her core clamped down on Ben. She floated for those few exquisite moments before she tumbled and shuddered, overwhelmed by her orgasm. Julia wailed with Arden’s cock still in her mouth and her core clenching Ben’s shaft hard. After a few more long strokes, Ben buried himself in her and came. “Oh, yes, kitten, clamp down on me. Oh fuck yeah, oh, Julia, yes.” She felt his climax, hot streams filling her, his hands grasping her hips, pulling her toward him as if he could get deeper inside her.
As the furious sex slowed, sounds of their panting filled the room. Julia was spent. She released Arden from her clinch and lay on the mattress, eyes closed. Euphoria enveloped her mind and body. She lay between the men. There were no words exchanged, just soft kisses and brushes of fingertips on lips, stomach, thighs until Julia faded to sleep.
* * * *
The next morning, Julia woke up between the men, their warm bodies intertwined with hers and surrounding her as if they all were a litter of puppies. Julia instantly remembered the night before.
Oh. My. God.
It seemed as if her emotions had been waiting patiently for her to wake up so that they could start their upheaval. A battery of thoughts hammered her, fighting for her attention.
Julia slithered away from Arden and Ben down toward the foot end of the bed until she was freed.
She quickly put on her new sweatpants, one of the men’s oversized T-shirts, coat, running shoes, and gloves. She didn’t know where she was going. All she knew was that she needed some time alone. She needed to run. It had been some time since she’d put some miles behind her, and it was exactly what she needed to clear her head and sort out some feelings right now.
Julia slipped out the back door and started running when she hit the road.
They had planned this with each other—behind her back. They’d discussed taking her together without letting her in on the discussion.
Had they tried to get her drunk first?
Julia literally felt her anger rising and began running faster.
Arrogant fucks. Didn’t they know her at all? Wouldn’t they know that she would want to be included in that discussion?
Oh, yeah, Julia, and how was that going to go? “Hey, Julia, we want to both fuck you together. You could be our plaything, our toy. Okay?” She shook her head. That definitely wouldn’t have gone over well, and they knew it. She wouldn’t have agreed. But the surprise attack had worked well for them.
So they decided to share like good little boys. Wouldn’t their moms be proud? Yeah, they shared her because they both have dicks, and every dick wants a warm place to go, not because they loved her. And, bottom line, she wanted them to love her.
If they loved her they would have respected her enough to include her in this major decision, not prey on her vulnerability after missing them and worrying about them for the days they were gone.
They knew she would cave.
She was such an idiot. How could she have given in to temptation like that? It was self-destructive and self-centered.
In the moment, it felt so good. Last night, she had felt like two men could love her and she could have it all. Stupid.
They had worked out a way to keep what was important to them—their friendship—intact. Both men got what they wanted. She was just the woman, just the target of their plan. The odd man out. She didn’t belong.
How could she have ever felt there would be anything more?
Because you wanted it so badly.
Yes. She did. But she wanted it the right way. She wanted them to love her. If she was just fucking to fuck, she needed to know. If she was making love, she needed to know that too.
And that was really the crux, wasn’t it? She still didn’t know which it was.
Last night, the total surrender and fulfillment she gave and received had felt like a precious gift. It was a gift she wanted so badly she hadn’t even hesitated when they started to touch her.
Slowing down her run to a walk, Julia began to cry.
“Why are you crying?” Julia snapped around and gasped when she saw the woman standing at the edge of the tree line a mere six feet away from her.
Julia let out a breath. “Oh, you scared me to death!”
“Sorry, I’m Ann. Are you Arden and Ben’s friend?” she asked while she scanned the road behind Julia as if to see if somebody was chasing her.
Ann was easily identifiable as Amish by the way she dressed. She wore a white cap, a simple, black button-up wool coat, over a full, black skirt that fell to the ground. Despite her drab-as-shit clothing and scrubbed face, Ann was a stunner. She had golden hair and round, innocent green eyes. There was instant warmth that emanated from her.
“Yes, my name’s Julia.”
Ann walked up toward the white line of the road where Julia stood. “My family is your closest neigh
bor. We live just over that rise,” she said, pointing forward toward the slight hill in the road ahead. “Did you run all this way?”
“Yes, I just needed to get away for a while.”
They started walking together in the direction Ann had pointed.
“Oh, I know the feeling. Winter just started, and I’m already trying to escape the house. I’m cooped up with the same people day after day, having the same conversations incessantly as if someday the words may actually change. Which, they never do,” she said, smiling at Julia. “So, you didn’t answer my question. Why were you crying?” Ann asked again.
Julia hesitated at Ann’s question. She didn’t know much about the Amish, but she was pretty sure that this woman never had to work through this particular problem or sort out these types of torn-in-half feelings.
Ann sensed Julia’s hesitation and continued, “In my experience, most women cry over love or loss. Sometimes both at the same time.”
Julia glanced at Ann briefly before she spoke. “Love.”
Ann nodded. “Love is never easy. There’s always pride, selfishness, jealousies, and fear that get into the mix and shake everything up. Plus, you got two men and one woman over there, and a pretty one at that. I’m sure they’re probably acting like idiots.”
Julia looked at Ann, surprised.
“What?” Ann said, returning her look.
“Oh, I don’t know. I guess I expected you to be shy and quiet. It’s the Amish thing, stereotypes and all that.”
Ann laughed. “Some stereotypes are true, but in my case, no.”
As they crested the hill, Ann’s home came into view. It was similar in style to Arden’s but looked much larger. Smoke billowed out of the fireplace, and a wraparound porch wound its way around the corner and out of sight. The home was surrounded by acres of flat fields on both sides of the road. A large wooden barn that looked like it was a hundred years old if it was a day sat tilting precariously, farther away. A black buggy with a bright orange triangle affixed to the back rested in front of it.
Snow started to fall in large, silent flakes around them. As Julia stood at the apex of the hill, looking at the scene spread out before her, the feeling of stepping into some surreal version of the world took over. It was like she had stepped into a movie.
Julia and Ann walked and talked until they reached the farmhouse. Ann invited her in, but Julia felt uncomfortable and hesitant. Without warning, Ann grabbed her hand, said, “Come on,” and pulled her up the stairs into the house.
The inside of the house was warm and welcoming, with a fire in the fireplace and lanterns lighting one large, open room. A few women were working in the kitchen area preparing food, and men of various ages were sitting in the open space next to the kitchen, quiet. Julia wondered if they were sitting quietly before she came in or if the group just clammed up when they entered.
“This is Julia, the woman that Arden told you about, Papa.” Ann was looking at an older man who rose from his chair.
“Nice to meet ya. I’m Samuel Yoder,” he said, nodding toward her.
Julia smiled and nodded back, shyly. Julia noted to herself how much her personality changed while in the company of her neighbors. She had never felt so meek in all of her life. She sensed that if these people really knew the potty-mouthed, opinionated, wild-inside woman she was, they would not approve.
Ann introduced her to all the people in the home. There were so many, the only ones Julia remembered for sure were Samuel and Rebecca, Ann’s parents. All the other people gave warm and friendly greetings, and then the women quickly returned back to work. Ann walked Julia over by the fire so that they could warm themselves.
“It has started to snow outside,” Ann reported to her father.
Samuel picked up his straight-backed wooden chair and set it down by the fire for Julia to sit in, then pulled over seats for himself and Ann.
“How’d you get this far away from your farm?” he asked.
“I jogged. I guess I just lost track of time. About how far away from there are we?”
“Oh, I don’t know, ’bout seven miles.” Samuel continued, “It‘s goin’ to be a lot harder to get back home with the snow fallin’ now. But we should be able to give you a ride if it doesn’t get too deep.”
“That would be great. I appreciate it.”
“I passed your name on to my kin that traveled back over Pennsylvania way, like Arden asked me to. He promised me that if there was a way he could get the message that you were okay to your brother, he would find it.”
“Arden is trying to find my brother?” Julia’s eyes filled with tears.
“Yep. He didn’t tell you?” Samuel humphed. “He probably didn’t want to get your hopes up is all.”
Julia nodded. “Does your…kin live near the National Guard station in Annville?”
“Same county.”
Julia sat silent for a moment. John could have already gotten a message that she was alive and know where she was.
“Thank you so much, Mr. Yoder. You don’t know what that means to me.” Julia’s eyes started to water, and her throat started to close up.
“It was no trouble, no trouble at all.” Samuel cleared his throat. “A woman alone needs to be with her family if she can.”
Ann took Julia’s coat and invited her to stay for lunch. Knowing the value of food, she tried to refuse, but in the end, she stayed and ate with the huge family. During the meal, she talked with Ann, her mother, and sisters about her first attempts at canning, and they gave her tips on how to better some of her recipes.
Julia brought up her dismal attempt at making soap. They laughed and nodded in knowing agreement. Since they had bought their soaps either from the store or from another Amish homestead across the county, they were no better at making it than she was.
Julia asked about raising chickens, and the women said that, come spring, the chickens would go broody and try to hatch chicks. They told Julia that they would love to barter some chicks or some of the overabundance of wheat flour they had for corn.
She learned that they had kin all the way from Minnesota to eastern Pennsylvania close to where John was, but they weren’t sure of their survival since many of the Amish would not kill another person to defend their homes from raiders. The conversation fell silent after that with just the sounds of the forks hitting plates and a palpable tenseness in the air.
When the meal was over, she helped collect the plates with the other women, and then Ann pulled her over toward the fireplace again. “Please stay for just a little while longer. It’s been such a long time since I’ve had the chance to visit with somebody new.”
Still angry, Julia agreed to stay, fully knowing that Arden and Ben would be up and worried about her. She would show them how it felt for others to make decisions without including them, and she wanted to piss them off. No, she wanted to hurt them so they knew how it felt to be played with. They could dish it out. Let’s see if they could take it.
“Do you know how to crochet?” Ann asked Julia as she pulled out a scarf that she’d almost finished.
“Yes, believe it or not, I do. My grandmother taught me when I was young. I haven’t done it in a while.”
“Let’s see if it comes back to you.” She handed Julia a skein of navy-blue yarn and a crochet hook.
Within a minute, Julia was crocheting without much effort or concentration at all. “I guess it’s like riding a bicycle. You never forget.”
After spending another hour or so talking with Ann and crocheting, Julia sighed and announced that she had better go. There was already a couple of inches of snow on the ground, and it would be hard to get home if she waited any longer. Plus, Julia realized, she wasn’t that angry anymore. The diversion from the two at home and from all the thoughts bubbling inside her head had calmed her.
Samuel called out to one of the younger boys across the room, “Amos, get the buggy to take Julia home.”
With a nod, a scrawny boy, about the age of ten, pu
t on his coat and donned his hat to get the buggy hooked up to the horse.
With warm good-byes and thank-yous to everybody, Ann walked with Julia out the door to wait for Amos to pick Julia up.
“You’re lucky. Any more snow and it would have been hard to get the buggy through it.” She smiled at Julia. “I’m so glad we met. Here, take this with you.” She handed Julia a brown paper bag.
“What’s this?” She opened the bag and looked inside. The navy-blue beginnings of her crocheted scarf with the hook and yarn were inside.
“You’re going to need something to keep you busy. Winters can be long and boring.”
“Thank you so much.” She hugged Ann.
“Come back and visit me soon, please.”
“You’re always welcome at our farm if you ever need to get away,” Julia said, remembering that Ann was doing just that when they’d met in the road.
When Amos stopped the buggy in front of them, Julia climbed up into the seat next to him. He didn’t speak to her during the entire ride home, but she got the impression it was because he was shy and didn’t know what to say. Amos did fit her stereotype of the Amish, even if Ann didn’t.
* * * *
“Where the hell is she?” Ben yelled as he stormed in the kitchen door. He had frantically searched the whole property twice with no sign as to where Julia went. When he’d woken up, he had reached over to caress her, kiss her. She wasn’t there.
He waited for a while and expected to hear her moving around in the kitchen or coming inside from the outhouse. She never did. When he’d gotten up to find her, she was gone.
Snow was silently falling outside, but there were no tracks that could guide him to where she had gone.
He woke up Arden shortly after. His desperation had grown every hour since then.
“If anything happened to her, I’ll never forgive myself.” Ben paced the floor and rewound the night before again in his head. “She fell asleep happy, Arden. I’d bet my life on it.”
Arden nodded in agreement. “I thought so, too.” He raked his hand through his hair and let out a big sigh. “We knew it was a risk, Ben.”