“Let’s turn in,” she ordered. “I would like to be on the trail before first light.”
HawkShadow bowed to her and issued a mock salute as he sauntered off to bed with the others.
Chapter 31
Delusions of Doubt
MeadowTune walked into the empty dining room and veered towards where Lyra, LifeTender, and Temiker were sitting. She brushed at her short crop of black hair absentmindedly as she crossed the room and sat next to LifeTender.
“You should be moving into RavenWing’s office,” she said to Lyra. “Not everything we talk about is good for everyone to hear.”
“There is nobody in here at this time of day,” nodded the Star of Sakova. “Besides, I do not feel as though RavenWing’s office is appropriate for me. Every time I go in there, I feel like I am trespassing.”
“Nonsense,” contradicted MeadowTune, her melodious voice smoothing the edges of any harshness evident in the statement. “MistyTrail will be back with Lord Marak this morning and it would not seem proper to greet him in the dining hall.”
“I will try it again,” conceded Lyra. “What news this morning?”
“Nothing good I’m afraid,” the resident spy frowned. “The Mayor of Campanil is calling for government action to invade the Sakova because of the watula field incident. He has a rather influential voice in Okata and our agent in Campanil thinks the government will oblige, especially after they have labeled the assassination of the Katana as a Sakovan act.”
“Great,” Lyra said softly, her lips pressed tight with nervousness. “Any more on the whereabouts of the armies?”
“Yes and it is not good either,” sang MeadowTune. “They are spread out around the Sakova inside the coast road. It appears that they are attempting to surround us, although access is still open in the North and there are pockets where we can still get through. If you are worried about StarWind, she will get everyone through the army blockade.”
That was a concern,” Lyra admitted, thinking as much about her father as StarWind, “but I am also concerned with their intentions and how we defend against their attack.”
“Perhaps a meeting of our best strategists would yield some answers,” suggested LifeTender. “Let everyone know what the problem is and see what suggestions they come up with.”
“Would outlanders be allowed in such a meeting,” questioned Temiker with a sick look on his face.
“You are not an outlander as far as I am concerned,” responded Lyra. “Besides we need all the suggestions we can get and I am not fussy where they come from. There is something bothering you Temiker. Something other than the Omungan armies. What is it?”
Temiker met Lyra’s eyes and toyed with his beard. “I am worried about Malafar,” he finally admitted. “StarWind’s last message said they were going to drug him to sneak him out of Okata. I wonder how he will react when he wakes up.”
“You are also worried about how he will react to finding you here,” realized Lyra. I am also worried about that and more. It sounds as if his dislike of Sakovans has turned to hatred and he is still a very powerful mage. I wonder if I am making a mistake by allowing him to come here.”
“But he is your father,” interjected LifeTender. “How can you refuse to let him come here?”
“I am also the Star,” reminded Lyra, “and like it or not, I am responsible for everybody’s safety here. I should not let my personal desires interfere with the safety of StarCity.”
“Kaltara will protect us,” retorted LifeTender. “Even a powerful mage cannot stand up to God.”
“Perhaps,” Lyra said, “but Kaltara wants me to make the decisions, otherwise He would be leading the Sakovans Himself. I do not intend to just go through life making decisions with the attitude that Kaltara will not let me make a wrong one. When will StarWind return, MeadowTune?”
“I can not tell for sure,” MeadowTune stated. “She will probably push hard just in case the armies start inland. She would not want to get caught in the fringes of the Sakova. With horses instead of chokas, she could still be here by tomorrow or the next day.”
“Do you mean the birds haven’t spotted her?” Lyra asked. “I thought they were able to find any intruder.”
“The Sakova is large, Lyra,” MeadowTune answered. “They can not possibly find every intruder. That is why we always have patrols out as well. Besides they would not alert us to StarWind as they know her. She belongs in the Sakova. We could send a message to her though and the birds would actively look for her.”
“Do it,” ordered Lyra. “If you find her, send someone out with chokas for her party. I will feel better when she has returned to StarCity. I like the idea of a meeting and I want her input at it.”
Temiker smiled as he watched Lyra assume the heavy burden of being the Star with a healthy attitude. She was not afraid to make a decision, but she did not leap blindly into making one either. With experience under her belt, she would make a fine leader, he thought with pride.
“Before I go, there is another report with bad news,” continued MeadowTune. “Someone had been killing wasooki around Breele. They have been using Sakovan stars to kill the animals. As happened in Campanil, the Mayor is calling for help from the army. It is but another piece of proof to them that the Sakovans are getting aggressive. Pretty soon the entire country of Omunga will be screaming for our death.”
“We cannot continue to do nothing,” murmured Lyra. “If we do, Omunga will definitely attack and soon. MeadowTune, let me know the minute you can accurately estimate StarWind’s return. I want that meeting as soon as possible and I want her there.”
“Should I put that in the message I send to her?” inquired MeadowTune.
“Yes,” Lyra replied. “Temiker, you will have to decide how to react to Malafar soon. I want very much to see him, but I do not want him disrupting things here. I am counting on you to make sure nothing happens.”
“I will do my best,” the mage from Alamar sighed. “What about Lord Marak?”
“Lord Marak will have to wait,” Lyra decided. “As much as I would like to talk with him, our survival comes first.”
“I do not think he will appreciate that,” MeadowTune stated.
“Let him attend the meeting then,” instructed Lyra. “I am sure when he grasps what we are up against, he will not feel slighted at taking an inferior position to our survival.”
“I do not think he would react that way,” chirped MistyTrail as she crossed the dining room. “I am sure that he would understand the problems of ruling and handling emergencies.”
“MistyTrail!” exclaimed Lyra. “You made excellent time. I didn’t expect you until later in the morning.”
“I was anxious to return and our guests obliged me an early departure this morning,” she smiled.
“What is he like?” asked Lyra. “The fact that he made it to StarCity at all is promising. ”
“You will like him,” grinned the short Sakovan with pointy ears. “He is not what any of us expected. I have StormSong showing him and his men to their quarters.”
“StormSong?” quizzed LifeTender. “We probably don’t have to worry about them then. She will lock them in their rooms.”
Lyra dismissed the light-hearted banter. “It suddenly occurs to me that I have no idea how a Star is supposed to act,” admitted Lyra. “Everyone here just accepts me as I am, but a foreign Lord surely will not and he is probably anxious to see me.”
“I didn’t want to mention it before,” interjected LifeTender, “but some of the seamstresses have been making you a formal gown to wear at ceremonies. Perhaps I can inquire if it is done yet.”
“I do not think this Lord stands on ceremony,” MistyTrail interrupted. “We had trouble believing that he was a Lord. I would suggest just talking to him as you would to one of us. If the timing is bad, I can take him on a tour of StarCity. That would gain you some time, but I do not think he requires a formal dress.”
“A good idea, MistyTrail,” agreed Lyra
. “I will see him in RavenWing’s office at high sun. Can you keep him busy until then?”
“Not a problem,” grinned MistyTrail. “He is very curious about everything and that small amount of time will go quickly. We will take turns escorting him so that we may all brief you on what we know of him from the trip. That way you will not be surprised by anything.”
“Excellent idea,” complimented Lyra. “I think you do well as a group leader, MistyTrail. Were there any problems?”
“No,” beamed MistyTrail. “It couldn’t have gone better.” Even if HawkShadow had been leader, she thought to herself with pride.
“Good,” Lyra said with finality as she rose and ended the meeting. “I will be in RavenWing’s office when anyone needs me.”
Lyra turned and walked out of the dining hall and maneuvered the corridors to RavenWing’s chambers. She did not bother knocking as she knew he could not rise to answer the door since the attack by Mekin had left his legs useless appendages that no longer functioned. She opened the door and strode in and stopped abruptly with a grin on her face. Antello and Syman were scurrying to get RavenWing back into bed and under the covers.
“Caught you,” she laughed.
Her friends' faces turned beet red with embarrassment while RavenWing joined her in laughing at their reaction. “We thought it might be LifeTender,” sighed Syman. “She would skin us alive if she caught us.”
“She probably would at that,” nodded Lyra. The boys stood to leave and Lyra signaled for them to wait. “I have something I want you two to do for me, but I wish to speak with RavenWing first. Can you wait outside for me?”
“Certainly, Your Holiness,” smiled Antello.
Lyra turned with a scowl on her face that could have frozen the sun. “I can still whip you two in a fair fight,” she growled at them. She could not contain herself for long however and broke out laughing again. “One more Holiness out of you and I’ll prove it,” she chuckled.
She shook her head merrily as they scampered out of the room and turned to RavenWing. “I have had a hard time getting used to using your office,” she admitted. “I guess I still look at it as yours and I feel as if I am trespassing. Would you be upset if I had the boys remodel it? Nothing major just moving the furniture and replacing the wall hangings. I guess if it looks different, I will feel better about it.”
“Your problem, Lyra,” nodded RavenWing, “is that you think of it as my office. It is the office of the leader of the Sakovans. That is no longer my task but yours. Certainly you should change it to suit your needs and desires. If there are things of mine in there you wish, you may have them with my blessing. I have no need for any of that anymore.” He squinted his eyes as he watched Lyra and frowned. “That is not the real reason for your visit,” he surmised. “What is really bothering you?”
Lyra sighed and sat on RavenWing’s bed by his feet. “Where do I begin?” she asked rhetorically. “It is almost certain now that the Omungans will attack us. There have been more incidents of carnage, which was supposedly Sakovan, and the general population is starting to scream for a military strike. The Khadoran Lord arrived this morning and Master Malafar will be here shortly. I just think that I am in over my head. I do not know how to handle all of this.”
“Tell me what actions you have taken,” RavenWing suggested.
Lyra closed her eyes briefly and calmed herself before turning back to RavenWing and smiling sadly. “I have MistyTrail and crew taking Lord Marak on a tour until high sun so that I can be prepared to meet him in your office. My office,” she corrected. “I have asked Temiker to keep a leash on his brother. I am sending chokas to StarWind’s party so they can get back here quickly because I want to hold a meeting and hear other people’s viewpoints on what we should do. That was my main reason for coming here. I would like you to attend. I know that moving is difficult for you but I value your advice greatly.”
“And you think that you are in over your head?” grinned RavenWing. “I was chosen by the people of Sakova to lead them, not by Kaltara as you were, and I could not do better than you are doing. Why do you doubt yourself?”
“Most of what I am doing is based on other people’s suggestions,” complained Lyra. “MistyTrail suggested the tour for Lord Marak. Using your office is being pushed by MeadowTune. The solutions so far are other people’s ideas.”
“Certainly,” agreed RavenWing. “What do you think a leader should do? Just because you lead does not mean that you possess all of the answers, although when Kaltara picks a leader that is possible I guess. It certainly was not the case for me. There are many talented people willing to offer suggestions to you. Listen to them. Your job is to pick the solution you think is best. That does not mean that it has to be one that you thought of originally. In fact, you do not care who thinks of the solution as long as you get to hear it and chose it.”
RavenWing struggled to sit up and Lyra jumped off the bed and helped him get situated. “You are doing the right things,” assured RavenWing. “The answers to these problems will not come easily. I would be remiss if I did not attend such a meeting as you have suggested. My personal discomfort means little in the face of the weighty decisions you face, but do not let them bring despair into your heart. Take them one at a time and seek whatever solution appears to tackle the problem appropriately.”
“I will try I guess,” responded Lyra with less than full confidence.
“You will not try,” corrected RavenWing. “You will do. Your first priority is to rid yourself of this destructive self-doubt. You do not have the strength to continue carrying it and still fulfil your obligations. If you are afraid of making a mistake, rest assured that you will make many, but not to make a decision is the worst mistake of all. The Sakovan people count on you to make decisions and they will follow you no matter what path you choose. Just do not let them wander aimlessly.”
Lyra started to leave and RavenWing gently grabbed her arm. “Lyra,” he smiled, “we are all so happy that Kaltara has sent you to lead us. He will not abandon you. I suggest that you spend time in the chapel talking with Him. You do not value how special a person you are as the rest of us do. I spent my life learning how to make the very decisions that you now face and your actions so far are just what I would have done. Does that not suggest to you that He is guiding you?”
Lyra’s brow creased with puzzlement as she dwelt on RavenWing’s words. After a brief moment she pressed her lips tightly together and nodded. “As always,” she smiled, “your words inspire me. I will visit the chapel and try to purge my doubts, but first I must get my office in shape for Lord Marak’s meeting. Thank you RavenWing.”
He smiled as he let go of her arm and Lyra walked softly out the door and gathered Syman and Antello and led them to her office. HawkShadow was waiting for her when she got there. She directed Syman and Antello as to what she wanted changed and then stood with HawkShadow by the door.
“I see you survived the mission with MistyTrail at the helm,” chuckled Lyra.
“She did very good,” reported HawkShadow. “She must have had a good teacher,” he grinned.
“I heard that she did,” agreed Lyra. “Tell me about this Khadoran Lord.”
“He is an interesting person,” HawkShadow began. “He is young, not much older than you.” He grimaced as he realized what he had said and Lyra chuckled at his embarrassment.
“I have no control over my age,” laughed Lyra, “and I am sure he does not either. Why is he interesting?”
“He was not born into ruling,” HawkShadow reported. “He is the son of a slave and worked his way up in the ranks of the army. He is a highly skilled warrior and extremely observant. He misses nothing. He is the only person I have met who understands why I rove my watch when I take it. I did not have to explain it to him, in fact I would not have, had he not commented on it to me. I believe he is a kindred spirit.”
“Oh,” Lyra commented surprisingly. “Why do you think that?”
“He is lov
ed by his followers,” HawkShadow continued. “He accepts the indigenous Chula as equals and he frees slaves as soon as he gets them. He bucks the tide of Khadoran culture because he thinks it is wrong and immoral. With Lord Marak, there is right and wrong and wrong is unacceptable.”
“That only means that he wants to have his own way with things,” argued Lyra. “I would think that it is better to try and understand all sides of a problem rather than make people adhere to what he thinks is right.”
“I did not mean to imply that he is close-minded,” corrected HawkShadow. “He is anything but. He freely accepts other viewpoints on things, but refuses to ignore something that he knows is wrong just because it is convenient or profitable to do so. He has very strong ethics and stands by them no matter what the cost.”
“Ah,” nodded Lyra. “Is he picky about formalities or proper court procedure?”
“No,” HawkShadow stated convincingly. “If you are worried about how to receive him, do not. His men do not even use his title with any regularity and he does not seem to notice. In fact, he introduced himself only as Marak.”
“I take it that you do not deem him to be a security risk,” surmised the Star. “What about the men with him?”
“Gunta and Halman are very much like Marak in many ways,” HawkShadow declared. “They idolize their Lord and would not do anything to offend him or make him look poorly in the eyes of others. I would let the three of them roam freely without hesitation.”
“That is quite an endorsement from you,” remarked Lyra with obvious surprise. “I take it that you like this Lord Marak?”
“I like him and respect him,” acknowledged HawkShadow. “I am sure that you will too although I do not see what good he can do for us.”
“I didn’t agree to the meeting just because he could do something for us,” Lyra stated. “Mostly I agreed because StarWind thought it was a good idea and I value her judgement as I do yours. Thank you for evaluating him.”
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