“Forever from now, but I can’t wait.”
She waved, then walked back to the sidewalk so he could pull out. He gave her another long look before he drove away, leaving her standing in the dark in the place that frightened her most. She rushed inside and locked the door as quickly as possible.
She leaned against it, convinced her rushing heart had way more to do with the good memory he’d given her of that amazing kiss. One she’d hold on to until she saw him again.
Chapter Eight
Jon knocked on Steph’s door for the third time. He checked his watch. Nine fifteen. He told her he’d pick her up at nine, but of course she wasn’t up and ready to go. He stared down at Emmy, who looked up at him with a why-did-we-bother expression on her face.
“We should go home.” She didn’t really miss her mom. She said outright she wanted to live with him at the ranch. And while it made him feel good that she wanted to be with him, it also broke his heart. She should want to be with her mom, too. She should be able to count on Steph and be excited about seeing her.
Emmy tugged on his hand.
He held her in place and showed her the keys in his free hand. “I have the key. Let’s go in and make sure your mom’s okay.” He unlocked the door and walked into the smell of Mexican food mixed with cigarette smoke.
Emmy rubbed her arm against her nose. “Yucky.”
Yeah, the whole place looked gross. Steph still hadn’t unpacked anything. The entire dining table was covered in dirty dishes and partially filled takeout containers. The food from at least two separate meals had dried, crusted, and congealed.
Several empty wine bottles sat on the counter. Two wineglasses and several empty beer bottles littered the coffee table. More were out on the brand-new patio table he could see just out back.
Where the hell did that come from?
Did she use the money he gave her?
Right now, he didn’t really care.
Emmy ran to the glass slider and rescued two of the three cats, who’d gotten locked out, though as far as he knew, they were supposed to be indoor cats.
Emmy sat on the floor and dragged Puff into her lap. The gray-and-white longhair cat meowed incessantly, setting off her buddy Dot, named because of the single white dot of fur on her chest in her all black coat. Razzle ran out of the back room, a streak of orange-and-white fur as she dashed straight to the empty bowls on the kitchen floor.
No food. No water.
How long had it been since Steph fed them?
Emmy yelped as Puff squirmed out of her arms, scratching her in the process. “Owie.” She pressed her hand over her arm. “Bad kitty.”
Jon tried to hold off the tide of frustration. “Come here. Let me see.”
Emmy uncovered the small, bleeding cut.
He pulled a paper towel off the roll, doused it with water at the sink, and pressed it to the tiny injury.
Emmy stuck out her bottom lip. “Puff is mean.”
“I think she’s just really hungry, sweetheart.”
The incessant meows from all of them and the head-bumps and body rubs made it clear they wanted him to fix the food situation immediately.
Jon cleaned the cut, then gave Emmy’s arm a kiss. “All better. Let’s feed the beasts.”
Emmy smiled and went to the cupboard and pulled out a can of cat food. He unscrewed the top on the dry food container and filled the big bowl. All three cats dove for the food and started to gorge. Emmy handed him the can and picked up the three other bowls from the floor. He didn’t bother to clean them, just divided the wet food into three portions and doled it out. The second Emmy put them on the floor, the cats attacked them.
He filled the water bowl at the sink and set it in the middle of all three cats. They dashed from the water back to their food, unable to decide which they needed more.
Where the hell was Steph? No one could sleep through the hungry cat racket.
Emmy remained occupied with the cats, making sure Razzle didn’t steal Dot’s food after she wolfed down her own. Jon walked down the hall to the dark rooms beyond. Not feeling sympathetic or kind toward Steph, he flipped on the light in her room and immediately wished he’d just gone home.
Steph sat up, blinking against the harsh lights, and covered her eyes with her arm as the sheet fell to her lap, exposing her bare breasts. The guy lying spread-eagle on his stomach next to her groaned but didn’t move.
“He’s naked,” Emmy announced.
Jon quickly covered her eyes and pushed her back down the hall. “Go to the kitchen and wait for me.”
“What are you doing here?” Steph asked, her voice rough from sleep or whatever the hell she’d been smoking last night. The pungent stench in the bedroom didn’t smell like cigarettes.
He took in the empty beer bottles on the nightstands, the two piles of cat shit on the floor, the blankets mostly falling off the bed, and the guy who was so hung over he simply dragged a pillow over his head to block out the light and sound.
“Nice, Steph. Real nice.”
She went on the defensive. “This is my place. I can do what I want.”
“Great. Get your own car. Return the rental, or you’re paying the additional fees. I’m out of here.” He turned to leave, but glanced back. “And don’t forget to feed your fucking cats and clean their litter box before they ruin the brand-new carpet.”
He headed back down the hall and confirmed his suspicions that she hadn’t cleaned the disgusting cat box sitting on the floor in Emmy’s bathroom. Litter coated the whole floor and the box was full, so the cats refused to use it anymore. The ammonia stench filling the small room made him wrinkle his nose and rush to get away.
He picked up Emmy and carried her out the front door, slamming it behind him.
Emmy picked up on his bad mood, stayed silent, and didn’t fuss when he strapped her into her booster seat. He closed the passenger door with a gentleness he didn’t really feel.
Steph ran down the walkway in her too short robe and no shoes. Her tousled hair and legs for days drew stares from the two guys walking in the parking lot to their cars. “Wait. I’m sorry I overslept. You said you’d help me with the car.”
“And I showed up, but you didn’t.” He reined in his temper and tried to be civil. “I see you made a new friend.”
She pinched her lips into a lopsided grin. “I met him at this bar. We hit it off and things got a little crazy.” She shrugged one shoulder, unapologetic. “You had a date,” she threw out, like his evening with Trinity was the same as her getting drunk and probably stoned and sleeping with a guy she barely knew.
“Best part of my week.”
Her eyes narrowed and shock filled her gaze. “I thought you canceled because you had Emmy.”
She probably wished he did and that meant she still had a chance.
He shook his head. “She had a big enough heart to include Emmy. She helped me brush out the rat’s nest you let Emmy’s hair get tangled into and made us a home-cooked meal.”
His snide comments put Steph on the defensive. “Well, isn’t she a saint. We can’t all be Suzy Homemaker.”
“All I want is for you to take care of yourself and our daughter. I expect you to have your act together when you’re expecting me and Emmy. You should have had that guy out the door before we showed up.”
Her eyes twinkled with delight. “Jealous?”
He dismissed that insane question. “Date whoever you want. But when you have Emmy or know she’s coming home, you should be ready, so she doesn’t walk in and see a naked stranger in your bed. You should put her first,” he pleaded with her, hoping it sank in.
Her gaze softened. “I should have worked on the apartment, but I got caught up with him. He really is a nice guy.”
“Great. Good for you. But you promised things were going to change.” He pointed at her apartment. “You’re getting drunk and smoking in the house where your daughter lives. You said you wanted to give that all up and live a better life here.�
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He’d given up drinking with friends and colleagues to all hours months before Emmy arrived. Steph did, too, but the older Emmy got, the harder Steph found taking care of her to be, the more she needed a glass of wine, or two, to get through the night. Most of her party crowd drifted away once Emmy arrived, and Steph stayed home more often than not. Sure, she had her nights out with the girls when he had Emmy. Fine. But this was different. This was flagrant. And maybe had something genuine behind it.
“Are you unhappy about the move?”
She raked her fingers through her hair, making her robe gape open at her chest. Steph didn’t care or notice. “It’s a big change. I didn’t think it would be so different here.” Unhappiness and uncertainty filled her weary eyes. “I talked to my dad after you left with Emmy the other night. He said he’s so proud of me for stepping up.”
He found some sympathy for her because she really wanted to do the right thing and make her dad proud of her. “It’s only been a week, Steph. Give it some time. You’ll make more friends.” He notched his chin toward the apartment. “Maybe the new guy will introduce you to his friends, and you’ll find a new crowd to hang with.”
“He’s fun, but it’s not like that.”
Right. Steph wanted to keep her options open and thought she still had Jon on the line and hoped to reel him back in one day.
Steph sighed. “I’ll take care of the apartment, but I really would like your help buying the car.”
“Fine. You’ve got ten minutes to get dressed and grab what you need or I’m leaving.” He’d help her out for their daughter’s sake, but he wasn’t going to wait around for her all day.
She launched herself at him, wrapped her arms around his neck, and hugged him before leaning back. “Thank you.” She kissed his cheek and dashed away, running for the apartment to change.
He shook his head and called himself ten kinds of a fool for giving in, but reminded himself that Steph needed a reliable car to cart Emmy around when she had her.
But he wanted to make a few things clear, and called out to her. “Hey, Steph.”
She stopped and turned back.
“Listen, I get that we just got here and you wanted to blow off some steam, but if that place isn’t cleaned up on Monday and suitable for Emmy to come home to, I’m keeping her at my place.”
She planted her hands on her hips. “You can’t do that.” Before he assured her he would, damn their legal agreement, she sighed and said, “I’ll clean it up.”
“Thank you. I don’t want to keep her from you. I just want her to be safe and happy in a clean home.”
Steph huffed out her exasperation, but nodded, then walked back to her place.
He’d give her the ten minutes he promised and went to check on Emmy. He opened the passenger door.
“I want to go home.” Emmy stared at him, boredom plain to see in her eyes.
“Mom will be back in a few minutes. We’ll go buy a car, then get lunch.”
“I want a chocolate shake.”
“You got it.” Looks like today was the day he said yes to everything.
“Are you guys fighting?”
He put his hand on her knee to reassure her. “No. I’m just upset that the house wasn’t nice for you.”
She gave him a soft smile that didn’t reach her eyes.
At four, she’d probably forget a lot of the things he and Steph argued about and said, but he feared some things would stick in her mind and heart.
How long before she really understood him, Steph, and how they were raising her?
How long before she realized she deserved better?
How long before she blamed them for not doing right by her?
How long would he let Steph get away with this irresponsible behavior before he did something about it for Emmy’s sake?
“She didn’t feed the kitties.” Emmy understood that was a bad thing. The tantrums she threw about staying with Steph in the months leading up to the move made it clear she didn’t like the way Steph treated her either. Emmy’s bad behavior had spilled over into school. The teacher asked for a meeting only he showed up to because, guess what? Steph forgot about it. The teacher pointed out that kids who acted up in school usually had problems at home. She asked if she could help provide any support.
He decided it was time to make a change for the better for all of them.
He just wished Steph wanted to be better. He’d give her the benefit of the doubt because of the stress of moving and starting a new job. But if this kept up, he’d have to seriously think about what to do next.
“If I get a puppy, I won’t forget to feed him. I promise.”
He had more faith in his four-year-old keeping that promise than he did in Steph right now.
Chapter Nine
Jon walked into his dad’s new apartment behind Emmy, who squealed when she spotted a wrapped package on top of the new toy chest his dad bought for her visits.
“Not even a hello for your old grandpa?”
Emmy set the package down and rushed to wrap her arms around her grandpa’s neck.
His dad kissed Emmy’s cheek. “How is my sweet girl?”
“Daddy made me get a car. Boring.”
Jon filled in his dad. “We went with Steph to buy a new car.” Then he’d had to follow her to return the rental and drive her back to her apartment. It took most of the afternoon and several bribes to keep Emmy from having a complete meltdown.
“I saw a naked man,” Emmy announced.
His dad’s gaze snapped to his. “Excuse me?”
“Steph had company when we arrived at the apartment.”
“I see.” His dad set Emmy down. “Open your present.”
Emmy didn’t waste a second and tore into the wrapping paper. “A tea set.” She held up the box for him to see. “Open it. Open it.” She bounced on her toes.
Jon took the box and tore the top because of the industrial tape they used to seal it. He pulled out the plastic play set and placed the teapot, two plates, saucers, and teacups on the coffee table. “What do you say to Grandpa?”
“Thank you.” She pretended to pour tea into a cup and set it in front of her stuffed bunny.
His dad turned on the cartoon channel and waved him into the kitchen and away from Emmy, who chattered with Bunny while pretending to drink tea while watching Scooby-Doo.
“What’s going on with Steph?”
Jon tried to tamp down the frustration that always rose when he thought about her. “The usual. Apartment is a mess. She knew we were coming and was dead asleep when we got there. I had no idea she was with some random guy she picked up.”
His dad raised a brow. “Is that a problem for you?”
“Only in that she should have had the guy out the door before Emmy came home.”
“Are you sure?”
“Dad, seriously, there’s no love between me and Steph. If we didn’t have Emmy, I’d never see her again.” Seeing her now only made him regret being with her in the first place. The only good thing that came out of it was Emmy. “I just wish she could get her act together. I wish things were easier between us.”
“Are you concerned she won’t settle in here?”
“When I told her about the ranch and how I wanted to bring Emmy here, she got all excited about a new place, a new life. Part of her wanting to come with me was because her father had laid down the law about her always going to him for help. She wants to show him she can do it on her own.”
“She’s old enough to take care of herself.”
“One would think so.” He rubbed his hand over his stiff neck. “I’m afraid she’s going to change her mind about the move.”
“And if she does?”
“I’ll have to go back with her.” He really hoped that didn’t happen.
“And you want to be here.”
“I want to be here with Emmy. In my mind, the life we could have here is exactly what I want for her.”
“And I’m sure afte
r all the years you’ve worked so hard, you need a break, too.”
He deserved it. “I loved what I did, but I won’t miss the stress and long hours.”
“Working a ranch is hard work,” his dad reminded him.
“It’s a different kind of work. I’m ready to get back to it. I never thought I’d miss early mornings on the ranch and tending the animals, but there’s satisfaction in that. I’ve still got my hand in business. I’ll get something going at the ranch. It will be enough for me, and I know Emmy will be happy there.”
“And when she’s with her mother?”
“I’m hoping Steph will find her footing here.”
“Hope will only get you so far.”
“I know that. I just really want this move to work out for all of us.”
“Then I wish you luck.” His dad set his iced tea on the counter. “Now, I’m going to play with my granddaughter before we go to dinner.”
Jon watched his old man sit on the floor and pretend to drink the tea Emmy poured him. The smiles on both his dad’s and Emmy’s faces were exactly why he’d brought her here.
He hoped he didn’t have to turn around and take her back to California because Steph couldn’t live on her own without her daddy’s help and the safety net he provided.
Chapter Ten
The doorbell rang, drawing Jon out of the numbers circling his head. He blinked his tired eyes. He’d been staring at his computer screen too long. Emmy, on the couch behind him, was still watching a Disney movie. The gardeners had finished cleaning the yard and trimming the trees and bushes. He thanked God the incessant noise finally ended. He couldn’t wait to see the new plants they’d put in tomorrow.
He wasn’t expecting anyone and figured the landscapers left after they finished for the day. He hoped to God it wasn’t Steph after she made a big show this morning on her video chat with Emmy about how she’d cleaned and organized the apartment. He took the time to watch as she showed Emmy everything. He had to admit, she’d done as he asked. It finally looked like she and Emmy lived there. All the boxes were gone, Steph’s belongings were either displayed or stored away, and everything looked clean. She’d even made a point of showing Emmy all the cats and asked about how she was and what she was doing.
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