by Amity Cross
He said it as a snide joke, but I gritted my teeth and swallowed my anger. Fall in love and run away. It didn’t sound so bad right about now.
“I’ll be back in time for the concert,” I said striding into the bedroom and tossing my leather duffle bag onto the mattress.
“Vix will be proud.”
I hesitated. He said it sarcastically, which wasn’t anything new for Josh—that man had a smart-arse streak that rivalled most mean girls—but it was the undercurrent that got me.
“Vix?” I asked, hoping what I suspected wasn’t true. “What do you mean by that?”
“Don’t play dumb, Seb. You’re a smart guy.”
“She tipped them off.” My blood ran cold and I began to shove my clothes into the bag.
“This is her way of making sure you came back,” he went on. “You know she doesn’t care about collateral damage. She’s got these fucks on speed dial.”
“Bitch.”
“Yeah, tell me something that ain’t new.” I could hear the eye roll in his voice.
“And you’re okay with this?”
“Why are you so fucking mad?” he demanded. “This isn’t new, Seb. Even if she didn’t tip them off, it would’ve happened eventually. Does this chick have honey dripping out of her hole or something?”
“Juniper is different,” I shouted.
“Settle down.”
“One day, when you finally feel something for someone other than yourself, you’ll understand why I’m going to punch you in the face the next time I see you.”
Not waiting for his reply, I ended the call and immediately called the Page Break, but the line was engaged. Remembering Juniper had taken the phone off the hook last night, I cursed under my breath. I had to get back there ASAP.
Whirlwinding through the house, I shoved my stuff into my bag—toiletries, razor, clothes, coat—and zipped it closed as I strode towards the foyer. I snatched my car keys from where I’d tossed them on the table in the hall, desperate to get out of here and find Juniper first.
I wrenched open the front door and screeched to a halt, my heart jackhammering in my chest.
“Sebastian, over here!”
“Sebastian! Who’s the mystery woman?”
There were fucking photographers everywhere. They’d climbed the fence and were sitting on top of the brickwork, pointing cameras at me and snapping like mad. I was like a rabbit caught in a spotlight, staring at the circus outside my refuge, blinded by the rapid-fire flash bulbs.
“Tell us about Juniper!” someone yelled.
“Is it serious?”
“Are you giving up your career to be with her?”
“Do you love her, Sebastian?
“What about Mallory?”
Slamming the door closed, I beat my fist against the wood and shouted the foulest word I could think of.
It was too late. The vultures had landed.
17
Juniper
For the first time in my life, I could see into the future. I could see possibility, and man, it made me feel alive.
I was going to see Sebastian perform and meet his bandmates. We were going to see the world and get to know one another, and maybe this crazy attraction would turn into something more. It might be forever.
Sebastian Hale might be the guy I finally fell in love with. Maybe I already was. He was always there—in my mind, in my heart, and on my skin.
I smiled and pressed my fingertips against my lips. I wasn’t afraid anymore.
We’d decided he’d come and stay with me until we went to the city, so he’d left a while ago to go pack his things. My body hummed with the afterglow of our morning ritual—his cock in me as we came—and I began to make plans.
The fate of the Page Break was still heavy on my mind, and I knew I had to make a decision sooner rather than later.
First things first, I had to take a detailed inventory of all the stock, then decide what I’d do with it. Have a massive sale or try to unload some of it in bulk to another seller, or maybe it wasn’t worth the hassle. Maybe it was all bound for a recycling plant.
I dressed in comfy jeans, a grey wooly jumper, and my trusty combat boots, and made my way downstairs. It was murky amongst the shelves, the familiar scent of old books wafting up my nose. I’d miss that smell.
I opened the blinds with a flourish, determined to get in a good start before Sebastian came back. No doubt he’d be the ultimate distraction.
The canvas rolled up and bright flashes of light blinded me.
“Juniper! Over here!”
“Juniper! Are you in love with Sebastian?”
“Are you worried about Mallory?”
“Is it true that your father committed suicide?”
“Where’s Ziggy?”
For a split second I stood there staring at the chaos on the footpath outside the Page Break Bookshop, wondering if I was in a nightmare. Photographers were jammed up against the glass, taking photos of me and shouting questions I didn’t know the answers to. Questions all about Sebastian Hale.
I let out a panicked yelp and yanked the blinds down, shutting them out. They hammered on the window, shouting my name, determined to get a reaction out of me.
Holy fuck.
My heartbeat sped up to dangerous levels and I scurried into the back of the shop, hiding behind the true crime section.
“Is that the dog?” I heard someone say. “Who are you?”
“Who am I?” Vanessa screeched. “Who are you?”
“Do you know Juniper? Any comment about her relationship with Sebastian Hale?”
“Yeah, I’ve got a comment,” she declared. “EAT SHIT, SCUMBAG!”
The door rattled and the lock clicked, sending my anxiety into overdrive. Brandishing a heavy coffee table book—on the coral reefs of the world—I said a prayer. Leave me alone, leave me alone, leave me alone!
I peeked around the bookcase and sighed when I saw Vanessa squeeze through the tiny gap. Behind her, flashbulbs popped as people tried to shove their cameras through the crack. She slammed the door in their faces, holding the blind closed.
Ziggy rushed in and leapt against my legs, whining excitedly, and I put down the book.
“Holy fuck, Juni!” Vanessa said, making sure the door was locked tightly. “What’s going on?”
“I guess the paparazzi found Sebastian.”
“Gee, I’ve seen media scrums on TV, but that was insane. There’s gotta be like twenty guys out there.”
“Twenty?” I swallowed hard, my stomach churning. I was going to throw up all those bloody possibilities I was fawning over before I opened the blinds.
“They’re all over the place,” she went on. “I was at the IGA when Marg told me she’d seen them rolling into town. They’re up at the beach house, too.”
The hammering on the windows started up again and Ziggy began to bark, running back and forth along the length of the shopfront.
“Ziggy!” Vanessa called, clapping her hands. “Shut up! Ziggy!”
“I don’t know what to do,” I said though a moan. “What am I supposed to say?”
“Nothing,” my friend said as she wrangled the little Jack Russell. “You tell them shit all. It’s none of their business.” She took out her phone and scrolled through her contacts. “I’m calling Sargent Conway. He’ll give them the bum’s rush.”
“They’re right,” I said. “What about Mallory? What about the world?”
“Fuck Mallory and her autotune.”
“This is Sebastian’s world,” I murmured, crumpling to the floor. Ziggy had finally calmed down some and sat beside me, resting his head on my knee. “This is what he has to deal with every day.”
“He should’ve been here to protect you from this,” Vanessa said with a scowl. “He should’ve done something to stop it.”
I stroked the soft black fur around Ziggy’s ears and stared into his warm, chocolate eyes. Oh Ziggy, what am I supposed to do?
“Where’s Sebastian?
Has he called you?”
“I haven’t heard anything since he left this morning.” I waved my middle finger at the windows. “I assume he’s stuck at the beach house.”
“He should be here,” she seethed. “If he cared, he would be here.”
I was thinking the same thing, but another voice was whispering in my ear that maybe he was stuck.
“What am I going to do? I’m going to be stuck in here forever and my corpse will mummify.”
“You can come and stay with me and Hugo for as long as you want,” Vanessa offered. “I know Ziggy would love to have you twenty-four-seven. He gets to go bodysurfing when you take him out. You’re the fun auntie.”
I laughed despite the shit storm outside. “I think they’d find me there, too. I can’t bring this insanity into your life. It’s been half an hour and I’m already drowning in it.”
Somehow, I knew this was only the beginning. I imagined reporters would be going all over town, talking to everyone and anyone who knew something about me. Knowing how they loved to talk about something juicy, I was about to find myself stuck up shit’s creek with my paddle wrenched out of my flailing hands.
Crawling across the floor, I peeked over the edge of the counter and saw the phone was off the hook. No wonder Sebastian hadn’t called. I put it back on and immediately, it started to ring.
“Gimme that.” Vanessa snatched up the receiver. “Hello?” She listened to the caller and rolled her eyes. “And you can go eat a giant, steaming turd.” Slamming the phone down, she gave me a frustrated look. “You better keep that unplugged.”
What was I supposed to do? The world was spinning yet again. When Mum died, I just got up and dealt with shit. I kept myself busy and survived. I could do it again, one step at a time.
“I have to get on with it,” I said, glancing around the shop. “I’ll keep the blinds closed and figure out what to do with all these books.”
“You’re still going to sell?”
I shrugged, the lingering oppression of the waiting paparazzi still threatening to overwhelm me. “Sell, rent... I don’t know. I do know the Page Break, as we know it, has to wind down.”
Vanessa sighed and ran her fingers over the spines of the arts section by the counter. “It’s just—”
“An end of an era,” I finished off.
“What a way to go out.” The front door rattled and she sighed. “What about Sebastian?”
It was the million-dollar question. If this was his life, hounded and preyed upon, then I wasn’t sure the possibility of more was enough. Would we have to hide behind bodyguards and security fences twenty-four-seven? We wouldn’t even be able to take a walk along the beach without fear of being photographed. Our lives would be dissected and discussed on prime-time television. Everyone with a fucking keyboard would have an opinion about us.
I was just a woman who didn’t know who she was, with a failing bookshop to boot.
“He asked me to go with him,” I said. “He said he wanted to try to make things work.”
“Go with him where? On tour or something?”
“To Melbourne first. There’s some concert there he has to do.” I glanced at the windows, the darkness starting to get to me. “But I don’t know...”
“You told him you’d go, didn’t you?”
“Yeah, but then I woke up to all this.” My throat tightened and I choked back tears. “Hearing about it is one thing, but it’s an entirely different story when it’s shoved into your face and smooshed around.”
“You’ll have to face it sooner or later.”
“Oh, I know.”
“Let’s just worry about today first.” Vanessa glanced at the windows, then out the back. “So you need those evaluation papers from that scrag Hopkins?” I nodded. “You keep an eye on Ziggy and I’ll climb the back fence. Then I’ll find a way to get to Sebastian and smack his arse.”
I stared up at her. “You’d climb the back fence for me?”
“You’re going to owe me, just saying.”
The moment the word left her mouth, the back door started to rattle and we glanced at one another.
“I feel like I should get a knife or something,” she said.
Ziggy growled as I rose to my feet and approached the door.
“Stand back,” Vanessa said. “I’ll make sure it isn’t a bad guy.”
She made her way through the stacks of books and into the back room. I could see her through the opening with Ziggy on her heels. The door rattled and a sliver of sunlight brightened the shadows as she peeked out.
“Oh, lookie what we have here. It’s the man of the hour,” she drawled, letting in none other than Sebastian.
“Juniper.” He wove past her, strode though the shop, and wound his arms around me. I was so stunned, relieved, and confused, and I let him embrace me. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know they’d show up like this. Fucking vultures.”
I believed him, but it didn’t change the fact that they were here and would probably be here for a long time to come. At least while there was money to be made.
“Did they see you?” Vanessa asked. “Last thing I have patience for is twats climbing into the backyard.”
“They aren’t out there yet,” he replied. “But it won’t take long for them to try and find a new angle.”
Vanessa looked to me for permission to leave and I nodded. “I’ll be back,” she glared at Sebastian, “soon.”
The door closed softly, and we were alone. Well, as alone as we could be with an army of photographers slobbering on my front windows.
Sebastian and I stared at one another, keeping our distance. The weight of the paparazzi outside was palpable, neither one of us willing to start what would end up as an argument.
“How did you get out of the beach house?” I finally asked.
“I know a few tricks,” he replied. “Juniper.” He took a step towards me.
“I just want to be left alone,” I said. “I can’t handle all of this. I can’t. I’m not important or talented or anything.”
“You are all of those things.”
No, no, I wasn’t. I was just a regular woman trying to make it in the world. I’d never aspired to be rich or famous. I was happy with my small, uncomplicated life. Wasn’t I? I looked at Sebastian and felt things I’d never felt before, but was all this pain worth the possibility of love?
“Is this what it’ll be like?” I stared at him, willing him to say no. Please say no.
He lowered his gaze. “Probably.”
I scoffed and turned away, slinking into the darkness.
“Juniper, please—”
“Please, what?” I exclaimed. “They’re outside my house! They know about my dad. They’re asking all sorts of personal questions. They won’t go away!”
“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”
I wiped away a tear. “They’re not going to stop, are they?”
He shook his head.
“Great.”
“You can still come with me,” he pleaded. “I can protect you from all this.”
“It’s too late, Sebastian!” I cried. “We both know how this is going to end.”
“How?” he demanded. “How is it going to end? You can’t know that, Juniper. No one knows their future unless they leap. My feelings haven’t changed. I want you.”
I backed away, my fear getting the better of me. “You better leave before they find out you’re here.”
“Juniper, please.”
“I can’t!” I shouted. “I can’t handle this. I’m coming apart and it’s only the beginning.”
“We can work it out. I can get rid of them and sue their arses.”
“It’s a fantasy, Sebastian.” A tear escaped my eye and I knew we’d been doomed from the start. “Maybe that’s all it was meant to be.”
He stared at me, his expression falling into despair. His eyes swirled with emotion and he raked his hand through his messy hair.
“So that’s it?” he choked out. “Yo
u’re just giving up?”
“I’m not giving up,” I whispered. “I’m moving on.”
“Juniper. I need you.”
I shook my head and turned away so he wouldn’t see me cry. “You don’t need me. It was the idea of me you wanted. You know what to do now.”
“Fuck. You’re wrong,” he murmured, his voice wavering. “You’re so fucking wrong.”
His footsteps echoed through the dark shop, then I heard the back door open. I squeezed my eyes shut as it closed with a slam, the sound tearing through my chest.
Ziggy emerged from his spot underneath the counter and did a figure eight between my legs. Then he sat and looked up at me with his big brown eyes.
I was right. I had to believe I was right.
18
Juniper
They were printing stories about my family now.
My dad’s suicide was splashed over the front of glossy magazines, re-tweeted and shared online. The Page Break Bookshop’s social media pages were flooded with tags and comments, most of them awful. I was getting death threats from Mallory Grigorio fans who all seemed to think she and Sebastian were a hot item and I was the trashy home-wrecker. Keyboard warriors were telling me to throw myself off a cliff like my father. I’d be doing them a favour, they said.
Sargent Conway had tried to shoo the media scrum away yesterday, but he was pretty much ignored. He was the only cop in town, so crowd control was totally out of his power. I’d drawn the blinds and hidden in darkness, with my tears as my only company. I was a prisoner in my own home.
They were making money off my misery while I faced complete financial and emotional ruin. The only people who were profiting were the callous sharks outside.
Later that day, I managed to get a call out to Mrs. Hopkins.
“Oh, Juniper,” she said, “are you okay?”
I was numb. I couldn’t let anything through my armour. I had to keep going.
“I’m calling about the evaluation,” I replied, ignoring her question. “I’ve made a decision.”