Ten Million Reasons

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Ten Million Reasons Page 8

by Heather Gray


  Friday morning came, and Genevieve got dressed for a jog. She stepped out her front door and began walking toward her driveway only to find she was blocked in by a familiar, swanky luxury sedan. Richard sat there in the driver’s seat. Why isn’t he moving? Upon closer inspection, it appeared the man was asleep. Genevieve tapped on the passenger window, and he jumped, hitting his head on the roof of the car. I’d say he’s awake now.

  Richard climbed out of the car and stood there looking at her. “You fell asleep,” she said. He nodded. “In my driveway.” Again, he nodded. “How long have you been here?”

  Eyeing his watch, Richard shrugged. “You didn’t call. I thought I’d wait till the sun came up at least before knocking. Didn’t mean to nod off.”

  “You look awful.” Okay, I might need to work on my tact a bit. The truth was Richard did look terrible. He had dark circles under his eyes, his clothes were wrinkled, his hair was mussed, and he’d lost weight. “Is everything okay?”

  “You didn’t call.” It was a short answer, but there was a myriad of emotions in his words, scratching at his voice like a wool blanket on a hot summer day. The fractured look on his face pulled at her heart.

  They stared at each other a moment before Genevieve finally said, “I know. What was I supposed to say? ‘Hi, Richard, about the proposal you mentioned…’ It sounded so awkward.”

  “Spend the day with me.”

  Feeling vulnerable and exposed, Genevieve took a step back and said, “I don’t know.”

  “What has you so spooked?” he asked. Then, wincing, he said, “Forget I asked that.” He rubbed a hand across his face and mumbled, “I think I’m still waking up.”

  Crossing her arms, Genevieve said, “I’ve done nothing but think about this since last Thursday. Over and over again I have asked God for advice. He keeps telling me the same thing, but there’s one question I can’t get past.”

  “Maybe I can answer it.”

  “What happens if I fall in love with you, and you never return the feeling? How can I spend the rest of my life like that?”

  A dark and brooding turmoil washed across Richard’s features then quickly dissipated. “Love is a choice, Gen.”

  “You’ve said that already, but I’m not sure I understand what you mean.”

  Resting his hands on the roof of the car that still stood between them, he said, “I always loved my parents, but I was never a priority to them. They could have chosen to put me first in their lives, but they didn’t. I won’t make that mistake.”

  “But what if…”

  Richard cut her off, “It’s so simple, Gen. After God, you will be the number one priority in my life. Any children we may have will come next, my company after them. I can’t promise you the moon, but I can promise that I will never consciously give you cause to doubt how important you are to me.”

  “But what about love?” A tenacious need for a satisfying answer wouldn’t allow her to let the question go. Genevieve didn’t know what sort of answer she expected from him, but she believed she’d recognize it when he gave the right one.

  “You’re talking about love as an emotion. I’m talking about it as an action. I believe the emotion follows the action. If I treat you with love, I will come to love you. You might not hear harp music or see dancing cherubs when we kiss, but I can promise you that I will do everything in my power to protect, cherish, and honor you every day that I get to spend with you here on this earth.”

  “Okay.” When Richard stood there looking at her, she repeated, “Okay.”

  “Okay?”

  “Okay.” I guess that's what I was waiting for. Protect. Cherish. Honor. I can't say no to that.

  “You’ll do it?” When Genevieve nodded, Richard let out a whoop and slid across the hood of the car like a teenager who’d just gotten his first taste of victory. He wrapped her in a hug filled with all his promises. As he held her close in his arms, she could feel the strong steady beat of his heart.

  How can I already be in love?

  “You won’t regret this, Gen.”

  I think I already do. She didn’t see how someone like Richard could fall for someone like her. A one-sided marriage sounded like a recipe for perpetual hurt, but she saw no way around it. Saying no would hurt worse.

  When her conscience nudged her about his promise to protect, cherish, and honor her, she shushed it. I need to be practical about this. I can't let myself get starry-eyed.

  ****

  Genevieve decided to forego her run. Instead, she agreed to spend the day with Richard. She ran back into the house and changed out of her jogging clothes, then joined him in his car. He was taking her back to his place to fix an early lunch.

  When they pulled up to Richard’s house, she was speechless. It appeared to be at least three stories tall, but she suspected there was another level below what she could see. The windows on the front of his home were easily taller than she was and afforded the home a breathtaking view of the Blue Ridge Mountains. The garage was around the side of the house and boasted two double garages. Relief coursed through her when he pulled into the garage bay and she spied only one other vehicle there. I’m going to have to get used to the wealth, but I’m glad he’s not ostentatious enough to own a dozen cars.

  Rather than give her a tour of the house, Richard told her to wander around at her leisure while he prepared something for them to eat. The man liked to cook, and she wasn’t going to argue. As she explored his home, she saw artwork and furnishings that put hers to shame. I’ll bet that couch cost as much as I made all of last year. The display of wealth was understated, though. Everything in his home fit together in a way that demonstrated masculine elegance. Those aren’t two words I’d normally put together.

  “Are you ready to eat?” Richard’s voice intruded on her musings.

  Genevieve joined him in the kitchen and took in the cozy table in a corner nook overlooking the acreage behind the house. “It looks delicious,” she said politely as her attention was drawn to the salad of mixed greens tossed with what smelled like orange vinaigrette, a shrimp and vegetable stir-fry and, if she wasn’t mistaken, almond-crusted grilled chicken.

  Once they were both seated at the table, Richard offered to bless the food. When Genevieve nodded, he began, “We are humbled to be in your presence today, Lord, and we ask that you bless our time together as well as our upcoming union. Guide us daily so that we continue to walk with You. Amen.”

  “My father,” she said as she stabbed her fork into the salad on her plate, “always asks God to bless the person who prepared the meal.”

  Richard laughed. “My grandfather always asked God to bless the hands of the one who did the cooking, but when I’m the one who’s done the cooking, I can’t quite get past how egocentric that sounds, so I skip it.”

  Genevieve swallowed her salad. Oh my. Then she took a bite of her stir-fry, and began to suspect something. After she tasted her chicken, she knew for certain. He’s a far better cook than I am. Not wanting to tell him he was going to have to do the cooking or get used to macaroni and cheese from a box, she grabbed on to the next topic she could think of and said, “I can’t tell my family until after we’re married.”

  Richard’s eyebrows shot up in response, “I thought you’d want them there.”

  “When the pastor asks if anyone objects, my family will stampede.”

  “Even if you tell them it’s what you want?”

  “My family thinks I’m picky,” she answered as if that explained everything. When Richard continued to look at her in question, she added, “If I suddenly announce we’re getting married, they’ll believe something’s wrong and will try to stop the wedding until they get to the bottom of things.”

  “And how will it help anything if you wait till after we’re married to spring it on them?” Richard’s voice vibrated with unease about her plan.

  “Marriage matters. Even with Maureen’s divorce, marriage is still important in my family. They won’t ever do
anything to try to break our marriage up unless they believe you’re hurting me.”

  “Alright then, if you think that’s best.” He wasn't doing a very good job of hiding his skepticism.

  “I do,” said Genevieve with a firm nod.

  “Just remember those words when the pastor asks,” he joked.

  After lunch they went to the courthouse and got the marriage license. They were on their way to the county clerk’s office when Richard asked, “Do you have a date in mind?”

  “Tomorrow, if we can.”

  His eyebrows again shot up, and he said, “You’re full of surprises, Gen. Are you sure you don’t want to wait? Maybe shop for a dress or any of the other things that women usually do before a wedding?”

  She shook her head and tried to dislodge the doubts assailing her. “If we wait too long, I’ll have second thoughts.”

  “I don’t want you to feel so rushed that you end up regretting that we didn’t take more time.”

  Genevieve shrugged and lifted her hands in a helpless gesture. “If we wait, it’ll just make me sad. If I can’t tell my family, then there’s no point in going wedding dress shopping because I’d have to do it alone. There’s no reason to have a program printed or taste samples of wedding cake. Besides, I’d never be able to keep this big a secret from my family, so we’re better off just getting it over with and then dealing with the fallout afterward.”

  “I appreciate your pragmatic approach,” said Richard, “but I don’t like that you have to sacrifice getting a real wedding day.”

  She remained adamant that she’d prefer to get married sooner rather than later, and Richard finally called his pastor and set up a time the following morning. It would be the two of them, the pastor, his wife, and Richard’s personal assistant.

  When they stepped out of the courthouse, Richard tucked Genevieve’s hand into the crook of his elbow and then placed his hand on top of it. “Are you sure you’re okay with this? No one to walk you down the aisle?”

  “It’s not what I envisioned, but I can’t see any way around it.”

  “If you’d like, we can shop for a wedding dress.”

  Genevieve shook her head and said, “I can’t see spending all that money on a dress for such a small ceremony.” It’s not even going to feel like a wedding anyway, so why bother?

  “Okay, if not a wedding dress, then a new dress, something special to mark the occasion? Anything you’d like.” When she shrugged, Richard said, “I know just the thing.”

  Before she knew what he was up to, they were sitting in a posh boutique with a friendly woman who brought out dress after dress for Genevieve to look at. A couple caught her eye, and she tried them on, modeling each for Richard. She settled on a gauzy dress of soft yellow. Springtime and new beginnings came to mind when she looked in the mirror at how the dress floated around her as she turned this way and that. “It’s perfect,” Richard said. A short while later, they left the boutique with the dress, matching shoes, and every accessory she could possibly imagine.

  When he offered to take her out for dinner, too, Genevieve declined. “I think I want to turn in early this evening.”

  The drive from the boutique back to her house passed slowly. Richard tried to start a conversation more than once, but she couldn’t find the energy to meet him even halfway in his efforts. She would be getting married tomorrow. It was the right choice, but the emotional weight of her decision was settling on her shoulders like a chainmail tunic.

  When they arrived back at her house, Richard walked her to the door. He stood there, looking hesitant to leave. Genevieve wondered if he was going to kiss her. Yeah right! We’re nothing but strangers! Instead, Richard took both her hands in his and said, “I know what a sacrifice this is for you, Gen, and you have my undying gratitude.” With that, he was gone.

  Genevieve stepped inside, closed the door behind her and leaned her back against it. “Gratitude,” she said to the empty house as she blinked back tears, “is not what I want from the man I’m about to marry.”

  Chapter Seven

  Richard’s pastor wasn’t at all what Genevieve expected. He was middle-aged with brown hair just starting to turn grey. Whereas his appearance wasn’t particularly remarkable, his jovial demeanor drew her notice. Despite his age, he made her think of a doting grandfather. His wife, while not exactly dour, had a more solemn countenance, as reflected in the brown, tweed dress suit she wore and the fading blonde hair pulled back into a severe bun.

  The church itself was homey and comfortable. Nothing about it shouted Multi-Millionaire Attends Here! The carpet was ecru, and the pews were burgundy. Together with the simple wooden pulpit and well-aged piano, they filled the sanctuary with a sense of welcome.

  Genevieve, wearing her new dress, stood with Richard at the front of the sanctuary as the pastor led them in reciting their vows. Model-Talker and the pastor’s wife – aka Lady Old Fashioned – were seated together in the front row.

  “…and thereto I pledge my faithfulness till death do us part,” said Richard, completing his vows.

  The pastor then turned to her and said, “Repeat after me. I, Genevieve Mason, take thee…” Thankfully the ceremony was over before her mind had a chance to wander again. She couldn’t remember any of it, but she must have spoken the right words at the right time.

  When she heard, “You may now kiss the bride,” her eyes flew to Richard’s in panic. They’d never even kissed before, and she didn’t want the first time to be here in this room with these people watching. Her husband might know them, but to her they were strangers.

  Before her apprehension had a chance to take flight, Richard put his hands on her shoulders and leaned in. His eyes begged her to trust him, and his touch warmed her, washing away the icy panic that had rushed through her at the word kiss. Richard’s lips brushed softly against her cheek, and the remnants of tension left her body. Suddenly weak, she reached out to steady herself, grabbing hold of his arm as he turned to face their audience of two. He tucked her hand into the crook of his elbow and led her out of the church to his waiting car.

  With the exception of her reaction to the almost-kiss, the entire ceremony felt anticlimactic to Genevieve. She wondered why since she’d hardly had time to build up any expectations in her mind. Duh. I’ve been planning my wedding day since I was six years old. Of course I had expectations! Genevieve had never been the sort to spend hours wiling away the day looking at bridal magazines. Much like every girl in America, however, she had thought about the dress she would wear, the flowers, the cake, the groom. To have it all over and done in such a short time with none of the pageantry or people she’d always envisioned somehow felt…inadequate.

  As they pulled out of the church’s parking lot, Richard behind the wheel, Genevieve asked, “So what now?”

  Richard glanced at her, and she got the distinct impression he had no more answer to that question than she did. After a moment, he said, “We could get on a plane and go anywhere you’d like, spend some time together, do something you’ve always dreamed of but never got around to. Whatever you’d like.”

  Genevieve bit her lower lip before saying, “I can’t go disappearing on a trip without telling my family what’s going on.”

  “Do you want to go see them now?”

  She quickly shook her head. Then, rolling her eyes, she said, “I don’t know why I’m acting like this. My family’s always accused me of being scatterbrained, but even then, I’m usually pretty decisive about things.”

  “I think you’re allowed to feel off-kilter for a little while. This is going to be a major life change for both of us.”

  Genevieve stared out the window. After a moment, she turned and asked Richard, “What will happen to my house?”

  “We can sell it, or you can rent it out, or you can keep it and turn it into an office, where you go to do your writing. Whatever you want. Did you have any ideas?”

  “No. I hadn’t thought of it yet. It just now occurred to me tha
t something would have to be done with it. I think it’s going to take a while for this whole thing to sink in.”

  Shrugging, Richard said, “We don’t have to decide right now.” They drove on in silence for a while before he spoke up again, saying, “People sometimes date for months or even years before they get engaged. Then they take months to plan the wedding and organize every little detail of what their lives will be like after they’ve tied the knot. We, on the other hand, went about it backward, and that’s bound to be with us for a while. Things are going to come up. Questions will arise. We’ll just deal with them as they come, okay? We don’t have to figure everything out today.”

  Genevieve nodded, and gave Richard a relieved smile. He’d put voice to some of the very fears that had been bubbling just beneath the surface of her emotions.

  After a couple minutes, she said, “Tomorrow is a family dinner at my folks’ house following church.”

  Smiling, Richard asked, “Is there a dinner every week?”

  Genevieve shook her head, “It’s mandatory once a month. The rest of the Sundays are hit and miss.”

  “Let me guess. Tomorrow is mandatory.” When she nodded, Richard said, “Will you be ready to tell them?”

  “I’m going to have to be. I can’t lie to them.”

  Richard nodded, but to Genevieve’s eye, he appeared slightly less confident than he had a minute before.

  “I’m not pressuring you, but when do you think you’ll be ready to move into my house? Or,” he asked, “would you rather we buy a new house together?”

  Genevieve shook her head, “Your home is lovely. I wouldn’t dream of making you move.”

  “I’d do it if you thought it would make all this easier for you.”

 

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